Introduction:
A. Once there was an elderly widow who had recently married a 4th husband.
1. A reporter saw the wedding announcement and was interested in her story, so she interviewed her.
2. The reporter asked her about the occupation of her newly acquired husband and she replied that he owned a funeral home.
3. Curious about her previous husbands who had died, the reporter also asked about their occupations.
4. The woman explained that her first husband was a banker, her second was a circus ringmaster, and her third husband was a minister.
5. The reporter said, “None of those people have anything in common! Why did you marry those men with very different occupations?”
6. The woman matter-of-factly said, “I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.”
B. You might be surprised to know that the Bible actually has a lot to say about caring for widows.
1. I love the story from 2 Kings 4 about a widow who had been married to a prophet.
2. We are not told how the widow’s husband had died, but when he died, he owed money, and his poor widow inherited the debt.
3. So the creditor had come to collect her only valuables which happened to be her two sons.
4. The creditor would keep them as slaves or sell them on the slave market.
5. The widow didn’t know what to do, she didn’t want to lose her sons, but she didn’t have any other way to pay her debt.
6. In desperation, she sought help from the man of God named Elisha.
7. Elisha asked her, “What else do you have in the house?” “Nothing but a jar of oil,” she replied.
8. He told her to go, collect all the empty jars she could, and fill them all from the one jar of oil she had.
9. So the women and her sons blanketed the neighborhood and borrowed every pot, jar, and bowl not in use at that moment.
10. They lined them all up; then they poured…and poured…and poured, until every container was filled.
11. The widow returned to Elisha and he told her: “Now go sell the oil and pay your debt, then you and your sons can live on the rest.”
12. The widow did as she was told, and was blessed by God’s provision through the prophet Elisha.
C. So we see through that story and many other verses of Scripture that widows have a special place in God’s heart.
1. God not only has a special place in his heart for widows, but God holds accountable those who neglect or take advantage of widows.
2. Moses received the 10 Commandments and the rest of the Law of God which includes these words: “You must not mistreat any widow or fatherless child. If you do mistreat them, they will no doubt cry to me, and I will certainly hear their cry. My anger will burn, and I will kill you with the sword; then your wives will be widows and your children fatherless.” (Ex. 22:22-24)
a. I would call that a harsh warning, wouldn’t you?
b. Basically God said: “Don’t mess with widows or orphans, or I will mess with you!”
3. Through the prophets, God often expressed concern for widows, like this passage from Isaiah 1:17; “Stop doing wrong, learn to do right. Seek justice, encourage the oppressed, defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow.”
4. When we turn to the New Testament, we notice in Acts 6 that concern for widows was one of the first organized ministries of the church.
a. Some widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food and so a new ministry was put in place to meet that need.
5. When James wrote his practical letter, he clarified what Christians should be doing with these words: “Pure and undefiled religion before God the Father is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself unstained from the world.” (James 1:27)
6. So we see that the simplest and purest form of godliness is to protect and provide for the vulnerable and defenseless – which include widows and orphans.
D. Therefore, it shouldn’t surprise us that when Paul wrote to Timothy to give him practical instructions about ministering to different groups in the church, that instructions about widows would be included.
1. Last week, we looked at Paul’s instructions about how to treat older and younger men, and older and younger women, and how to treat worthy elders and sinning elders.
2. Today, we want to explore Paul’s instruction about taking care of widows.
I. First, Let’s Make Some General Observations
A. Although concern for widows is scattered throughout the Bible, there is no more extensive chunk of Scripture devoted to the topic of widows than we find right here in 1 Timothy 5:3-16.
1. It may strike us as unusual that Paul would devote so much space to the proper care of widows, but consider the day in which he and Timothy ministered.
2. First, we should remember that many men were ostracized, persecuted, and even put to death for following the new Christian faith which left their wives, some of them very young, to fend for themselves.
3. Second, consider the fact that women didn’t have the choice of careers that women have today, and there was no pension plan or Social Security for them to depend on.
4. Additionally, medical care was primitive, and many men died far younger than they die today.
5. All of these factors resulted in there being many Christian widows who found themselves in great need.
B. Let’s get an overview of the passage by noticing that Paul mentioned five different kinds of widows:
1. Widows in genuine need (vs. 3, 5, 16a).
2. Widows who have living relatives (vs. 4, 8, 16a)
3. Widows who live carnal lives (vs. 6, 11-13, 15)
4. Widows who are “on the list” (vs. 9-10)
5. Widows who are young (vs. 11-14)
C. One observation that surfaces is that the church must be careful not to waste its resources on people who not in really in need, or should have their needs met by their families.
1. Whether we like to admit it or not, there are individuals and families that “milk” local churches.
2. Some who are capable refuse to work, or they don’t use their own resources wisely and then look to the church to take care of their needs.
3. So that is a word of caution.
II. Let’s Look at Paul’s Specific Guidelines
A. So, whom should the church support? Which widows qualify for support?
1. Certainly widows who are truly in need should be helped by the church.
2. Paul wrote, “Support widows who are genuinely in need.” (vs. 3)
3. The word “support” literally means “honor” and it is the verb form of the word Paul used in verse 17 in reference to giving “double honor” to elders.
4. As we said last week, the command has financial implications, yet its meaning goes beyond mere material provision.
B. So, who are these widows in need? First of all, she’s a widow who has no living relatives.
1. Paul wrote: But if any widow has children or grandchildren, let them learn to practice godliness toward their own family first and to repay their parents, for this pleases God. (1 Tim. 5:4)
2. In Timothy’s day, when the primary breadwinner died, the responsibility for the widow’s care fell to her immediate family.
3. Perhaps some of the believers in Ephesus, where Timothy was ministering, were avoiding their obligations to support their widowed mothers or grandmothers.
4. Such avoidance was unbecoming to Christ, for Christians are to be the epitome of love.
5. Maybe that’s why Paul used such strong language in verse 8: But if anyone does not provide for his own family, especially for his own household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. (1 Tim. 5:8)
6. This verse is often used to exhort fathers and mothers to properly provide for their children, and it certainly can apply in that way, but the context has in view adult children and grandchildren providing for their widowed mothers and grandmothers.
7. Note how great is the contrast:
a. Caring for widows is putting religion into practice and is pleasing to God.
b. Not caring for widows is a denial of the faith, and puts a person in worse shape than an unbeliever.
8. But when a widow is without family to sustain her, then she should be able to depend on the church - her larger, spiritual family - for support.
a. The church can’t do much about non-Christians who don’t care for the widows in their families, but the church can hold Christians accountable for caring for the widows in their families.
C. Secondly, the widows who are supposed be helped are those who are godly women.
1. Paul wrote: The widow who is truly in need and left all alone has put her hope in God and continues night and day in her petitions and prayers; however, she who is self-indulgent is dead even while she lives. Command this also, so that they will be above reproach. (1 Tim. 5:5-7)
2. The church is supposed to support widows who demonstrate a preoccupation with the things of God, not those who live a worldly, promiscuous lifestyle.
3. It has been my experience, and perhaps yours as well, that godly widows can be “spiritual powerhouses” in the church.
a. They are often the backbone of the church.
b. They support church gatherings and ministries, they often teach in the children’s classes, and are often involved in visitation, hospitality, and service.
c. On the other hand, a widow who is not godly can be a great problem for the church.
4. So, the widows who are truly in need and who should be supported by the church are those who have no family to support them, and those who live an honorable, godly lifestyle.
D. Another category of widows whom the church should support are the widows “on the list.”
1. Apparently, the early churches, or just the church in Ephesus which Timothy was serving, kept a register of all the widows who were to receive on-going financial support.
2. In the next few verses, Paul goes into detail to designate those who qualify.
3. Paul wrote: No widow is to be enrolled on the list for support unless she is at least sixty years old, has been the wife of one husband, and is well known for good works—that is, if she has brought up children, shown hospitality, washed the saints’ feet, helped the afflicted, and devoted herself to every good work. (1 Tim. 5:9-10)
4. Notice the qualifications:
a. First, to be on the list, a widow had to be at least 60 years old, for reasons Paul gives later.
b. Second, the widow must have been faithful to her husband during the marriage.
c. Third, she had to have had a history of doing good works.
5. We don’t know much about how this special group of widows was organized, but it is obvious that they first had to meet some specific qualifications, and then they had to follow through in their role as doers of good works.
6. When they were put on the list, the church supported them financially, and they remained unmarried and involved in all kinds of service.
7. Commentator J. W. Roberts wrote: “We know too little of what Paul is directing to imitate it in the church in modern times. Surely if God had wanted this arrangement – whatever it was – to continue in the church, He would have given us more information on it. God’s word furnishes us unto every good work.”
E. Next, we notice that younger widows did not qualify for this list and did not receive on-going support for two reasons.
1. Let’s look for the reasons as we read the text: 11 But refuse to enroll younger widows, for when they are drawn away from Christ by desire, they want to marry 12 and will therefore receive condemnation because they have renounced their original pledge. 13 At the same time, they also learn to be idle, going from house to house; they are not only idle, but are also gossips and busybodies, saying things they shouldn’t say. 14 Therefore, I want younger women to marry, have children, manage their households, and give the adversary no opportunity to accuse us. 15 For some have already turned away to follow Satan. (1 Tim. 5:11-15)
2. Did you detect the two reasons younger widows should not be on the list?
3. First, because they may want to remarry.
a. It is not a bad thing for a young widow to want to remarry, unless she has made the commitment not remarry and has been put on the church’s special widows list.
a. To remarry after having made the pledge to the church is to bring judgment on herself.
4. The second reason not to put them on the list is that they may become idlers and gossips.
a. Widows who are older and more mature will likely know how to fill their time with good works and will know how to keep from gossip.
b. But younger widows, not having matured through years of godly experience – might take advantage of the financial freedom and sit back and do nothing but become busy-bodies.
c. Incidentally, women are not the only ones who can become idlers and gossips - men can also fall into that kind of sinful behavior too, but here Paul happens to be talking about widows.
5. So, what is the best course of action for young widows?
a. The best course of action is for them to get married, have children, and manage their homes, thus giving the enemy no opportunity for slander.
b. When a person is pouring her life into raising a family and tending to a household, it’s amazing how little time she has to waste or get involved in ungodly activity.
c. If idle hands are the devil’s workshop, then busy hands are God’s workshop.
d. And that’s true for men as well as women.
F. Paul ends this discussion with a final reminder that the family and not the church is supposed to be the first line of support for widows.
1. Paul wrote: If any believing woman has widows in her family, let her help them. Let the church not be burdened, so that it can help widows in genuine need. (1 Tim. 5:16)
2. God’s will is for both the biological family to do its part and the spiritual family to do its part.
III. Let’s Finish Up With A Few Underlying Truths
A. First, We learn that caring for one’s dependent parents and grandparents is a serious, scriptural responsibility.
1. Scripture commands parents to provide for their children (Pr 19:14; 2 Cor 12:14b), but then there comes a time when the tables turn.
2. Adult children are to care for their parents when their parents can no longer care for themselves.
3. Each family will need to decide the best way to care for the needy and aged ones in their family.
4. Some may decide that the best way to do that is to have them move into their home, but that may not be possible or may not be the best thing for every family.
5. The important thing is that believers show love and provide the support that is necessary.
6. Each generation should train the next generation regarding this responsibility, and we do that training though the things we teach by word and the things we teach by our actions.
B. Second, We learn that the church is never expected to support everyone in need.
1. The ministry of compassion and care must be accompanied by discernment and wisdom.
2. We would not be very good stewards of the Lord’s resources if we indiscriminately handed out money to every need that came up without first evaluating its legitimacy.
3. In some cases the church has a clear responsibility, but in other cases it is clear that a person’s family has the first responsibility.
C. Third, We learn that a full, busy life is much safer than an idle one.
1. When we spend our time serving the Lord, studying His Word, raising a family, earning an income, and building quality relationships, then we will be less likely to fill the empty hours with harmful activities.
2. When we get busy for the Lord, then it helps to keep us out of trouble!
D. Fourth, We learn that widows, especially older ones, can play a vital role in the church family.
1. The loss of their loved one does not have to overwhelm and immobilize them permanently.
2. Their new-found singleness can give them the freedom to focus more exclusively on the work of the Lord.
3. They can draw close to God and He can use their vast storehouse of experience for much good.
E. Fifth, I want to encourage us to also keep in mind that the needs of widows are not merely financial.
1. Not every problem faced by widows can be solved by money.
2. And in fact, a widow’s financial need may be the least pressing need she has.
3. Other needs that might be much more pressing and not solved by money could include the need to belong, or the need for fellowship in the face of loneliness or isolation, or the need for self-worth and affirmation.
4. These kinds of needs are resolved through relationships not through money.
F. Finally, When we care for widows and all the needy, we become more like God.
1. The Bible says that our God is a husband to the widow, a father to the orphan, and a provider for the poor.
2. Psalm 68:5 says: God in his holy dwelling is a father of the fatherless and a champion (defender or protector) of widows.
3. When we love and care for widows and for other needy and vulnerable individuals, then we become more like our God.
4. Let’s be more like our Father in heaven! Amen?
Resources:
• 1 & 2 Timothy and Titus, Commentary by David Roper, Truth For Today Commentary
• What About Widows?, Sermon by David Owens
• Charles Swindoll’s “Insights For Living” Radio Program Study Guide on 1 Timothy
