Title: “Pulling Weeds of Bitterness in the Garden of Life” Script: Heb. 12:14-15
Type: Thematic Where: GNBC
Intro: Most of you who have know me for any time know that I love to garden. Late in the winter I dig out my 50 year old Reader’s Digest book on Gardening. I begin to think about what to plant and where to plant and how much to plant. Every Good Friday I try to get my first plants in the ground. The past two years I have expanded my gardening to the Wetherby Park Community Gardens with my friend Paul. I love the planting. I love seeing the plants grow. I love the harvesting. One thing I hate: WEEDING! You can ask my friend Paul, he probably gets a little annoyed with my lax attitude towards weeding. Sometimes I try to take shortcuts by mulching plants and ground cover. However, every gardener knows that to produce the best crop possible, you have to weed your garden! Now, in Heb. 12, the Bible compares bitterness to a weed that doesn’t merely spring up in a vegetable garden, but rather takes root and contaminates a soul. The problem is that far too many people deal with bitterness about as directly as I like to deal with the weeds in my garden! Simply ignoring their existence won’t make them go away! Ignoring sin and bitterness won’t make those hurtful items disappear either, and will wreck the harvest of spiritual fruit God wants to grow in your life.
Prop: Today we’ll examine the problem, consequences of, as well as hope for the individual struggling w/bitterness.
BG: 1. Psychologists inform us that bitterness is a huge problem in our society. Not restricted to non-Christians.
2. Plain and simple, forgiveness is the antidote for bitterness, yet it is a costly commodity. Cost Xst’s blood.
3. If we’re ever to realize victory in Xst, must apply Xst’s forgiveness to our life and those issues cause pain.
Prop: Today we’ll examine the problem, consequences of, as well as hope for the individual struggling w/bitterness.
1st: The Problem of Allowing Weeds of Bitterness to Spring up in our Lives – Heb. 12:14-15.
A. I want you to Notice the Problem of Allowing Lingering Bitterness in our Lives.
1. Allowing a root of Bitterness to take hold in Your Life Brings Defilement to Your Soul.
a. v. 15 – defiled – used 4x in the NT, “miaino” – to stain with color, it carries a definite ceremonial or religious theme. Paul uses the same term in Titus 1:15 – “To the pure all things are pure; but to those who are defiled and unbelieving, nothing is pure, both their mind and conscience are defiled.”
b. The author of Heb. warns us that as we pursue peace w/ all men and holiness, w/o which no man will see the Lord…” we are to watch diligently so that no one resists God’s grace. You see, bottom line, holiness is a matter of the heart. It is an attitude. It is not necessarily a dress code or a keeping of certain laws. As believers we are supposed to pursue peace and sanctification – v. 14 – Peace w/ man and a right standing with God. Bitterness towards God or man stops both from happening.
2. What is lingering bitterness a sign of in my life?
a. Lingering bitterness in your or by life is a sign that we think we deserve better. Blaise Pascal, the brilliant French apologist, once observed that a crucial element of man’s misery is found in this: “He/she can always contemplate a better life than is provided for him to achieve.” It’s true, and don’t be mistaken, the casino owners, the lotto operators, the touch machines, all know this and appeal to you and me on that basis. Illust – You know, I find it very interesting, my dog Reuben could care less what type of vehicle he gets to ride around in. He could care less with which neighborhood our house is located. I seriously doubt he sits around contemplating a better life and being vexed about the one he has with us! We would all do well to adopt the Dave Ramsey philosophy: When asked how he is doing by those calling into his show, Ramsey always responds: “Better than I deserve.”
b. Now, let me ask you something: Do you think you deserve better? Be very careful how you answer that question. It is a key concept in how we market many things in this country. “You deserve it!” However, let me tell you that often a lack of contentment is directly related to past and present bitterness. And unfortunately, until we seek or ask or grant forgiveness, can’t fully enjoy what do have that will bring joy, happiness or pleasure.
B. There Are Consequences to Allowing a Root of Bitterness to Spring up in our Lives.
1. There are spiritual consequences to bitterness.
a. Have you ever noticed that a truly bitter individual is unable to accept spiritual truth or instruction? Usually will accept certain principles, or apply their interpretation to specific passage to own and all other’s lives, yet not loving, but harsh, and often skeptical. Again, why is this the case – because they are trying to justify selves and actions or attitudes, therefore have closed spirit.
b. There is a reason for this: Ps. 106:15 – Discusses Israel’s sin in the wilderness. “Israel insisted on having meat when God provided manna. It was not God’s will for them to have meat, but since they insisted on it, God eventually granted it to them. In return for meat, they received spiritual poverty. When you and I insist on our own way, rather than God’s leading, it can lead to unfortunate consequences @ higher cost than the anticipated benefits. (Illust – man is angry cause dinner not served on time when thinks. “I’ll teach wife a lesson!” Gives, silent treatment. Yet children observe. Respect and love for him goes down. Wife’s spirit closes towards him. Affects many areas of relationship. – Oh, but I have a right to have meal on table at 5:30 pm! Get over it! Give it to the Lord (probably need to fast anyway!). Illust – Think about Moses. He was bitter and angry about way Egyptians treating Israel. So much so that lashes out and kills a man. Moses thinks going to become serial killer and deliver Jewish nation one Egyptian at a time. God has another plan for him – next 40 yrs. look at hind end of sheep! Why? Had to prepare Moses’ skills and character before life task – leading Israel out of bondage.
2. Some would say they are even physical consequences of bitterness.
a. Illust - Bitterness, improperly handled, causes trouble--and it does so in at least two ways.
First, it causes physical problems. In his book "None of these Diseases" S I McMillan wrote, "anger, unhandled, will show itself in at least 50 diseases." Dr. H. Norman Wright, a professor of psychology at Biola University and a Christian writer, agrees with McMillan. God has constructed us, says Dr Wright, with an internal tube of about 30 ft. . That long tube, disturbed by bitterness and anger, produces things like colitis, diarrhea and ulcers. When we are angry and do not handle it properly, there are physical consequences. Bitterness can cause chemical imbalances in our bodies, which lowers our resistance to germs and bacteria and can lead to many serious diseases. Bitterness also tightens facial muscles, which can cause our teeth to ache and give us hard and unattractive facial features. Our bones and blood can be damaged by bitterness.”
C. Applic: Beware of allowing unattended weeds of bitterness to grow in your life.
II. 2nd: What are the Consequences of Allowing Bitterness to Grow in Our Lives?
*When a person allows garden to become infested with weeds, brings torment! That’s as true in your and my soul as it is a strawberry patch!
A. There are significant Consequences in Allowing Bitterness to Grow in our lives.
1. Spiritually Surrendered Ground in our Souls Brings Torment to Bitter People.
a. Eph. 4:27 – “do not give place to the devil” – KJV – word that is used for “place” in the Gk means an area of legal control. So when you and I become bitter, allow sun to go down on anger, we don’t simply stew, we are giving areas, relationships, etc. of our lives over to Satan to build debilitating strongholds. Some people naively think, “I am a Christian, Satan can’t influence me!” Wrong! Even as a Christian, if you are willingly clinging to areas of your life in bitterness, you had best beware.
b. Let me ask you, have you given “place” to the devil your life? Anger w/ spouse, boss, children? Bitter over the perceived or real blessings another Christian has received. Illust – Years ago, knew a Christian woman who was always telling another woman in that church: “Oh, you have it so good. Your husband would be so easy to live with, he’s nothing like my husband. Why didn’t God give me someone like your husband?” Now think about that series of statements. Jealous, faulty perspective, judgmental, ungrateful, blaming God for her problems, etc. Beware, throwing handfuls of weeds in your soul’s garden.
2. Would it shock you to know that God sends Tormentors to the Souls of Bitter People? (Mt. 18:32-35 Read)
a. Illust – Jesus is teaching a very important parable on forgiveness, tells story of wicked slave who was forgiven by his master of an unpayable debt. Yet, upon receiving such unmerited favor, he goes out and physically abuses a man who owed him a tiny fraction of what he had been forgiven (v.32-35). Notice what Jesus says in v. 35 – God will allow tormentors in our lives. You see a bitter person becomes the prisoner of his/her own making. Become angry, depressed, disillusioned, incapable of enjoying relationships, sometimes abusive and chemically dependent.
b. Shame on you Christian, and shame on me if we have been forgiven so great a debt as each of us has been thru God’s mercy, and yet can retain forgiveness for the comparably minor offenses some have against us.
B. Another consequence of Bitterness is that it will Sometimes Cause us to Make Decisions Contrary to God’s Will.
1. Be very careful not to harbor bitterness when contemplating a major decision.
a. Bitterness makes us foolish. Bitterness provokes people to do stupid things and to say stupid things. Bitterness hurts us. Bitterness is emotional suicide. Bitterness is drinking poison while hoping the other person will die. It is a very slow form of destroying one's peace of mind. It prolongs the hurt and it makes us miserable. Bitterness makes everyday life miserable. Normally bitter people have an amazing memory for the tiniest detail, and they wallow in self-pity and resentment. They record every offense in their and are always ready to show others how much they have been hurt. Bitter people defend their grudges constantly: they feel that they have been hurt too deeply and too often, and that this exempts them from the need to forgive. The weeds of resentment and bitterness choke out the weeds of love and blessing.
b. Illust: One elderly Christian couple in Phoenix chose not to become bitter by facing their discouragement 'head on'. They were discouraged that their children never came to see them on the holidays unless they bribed them and paid their way, even so last few years not come at all. In two days would be Thanksgiving. Couldn’t face the sadness. The father had an idea and called son in New York and said, "I have to tell you that your mother and I are being divorced; 45 years of misery is enough." (Their children are divorcing them by not seeing them!) "Dad, what are you talking about?" (Son). "We can't stand it any longer," the old man says. "We're sick of it, and I'm sick of talking about it. Please call your sister in Chicago and tell her." Hung up. Frantically, the son called his sister. She exploded, "Like heck they're getting divorced," "I'll take care of this." She called Phoenix immediately, and yelled at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling Mike back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. "The old man hung up the phone and turned to his wife. "I’ve got good news honey! The kids are coming for Thanksgiving and they’re even paying their own fares!" (Credit Faith Life Sermons, Timothy Glover)
2.
a. When resentment, unresolved anger, take root in our lives, we can become bitter people. Bitterness can be caused by any thing or any person who has failed us or brought disappointment and trouble to our lives. A bitter person can be sharp, resentful, cynical, cold, harsh, stressful, intense, relentless, distasteful, unpleasant. Any attitude represented in these words is a sin against God. That is why God wants our lives to be characterized by the fruit of the Spirit, ie. love, joy, peace, and holiness - not in bitterness.
b. Illust -A person with a root of bitterness in the church can be a corrupting influence on the entire body of Christ. It’s like a tiny thorn that causes an infection. Such infection affects the entire body. When such bitterness takes root, it can last for years. Some believers are still bitter over things that happened decades ago. We need to guard against allowing bitterness to take root in our lives. Illust – Our first church was very small. Most influential couple in the church had a relatively influential position in school system. Wife would come to morning and evening service service, but seemed to dislike everyone, hate being there and would grade papers in service. Within few months realized church not going to quit, so they decided to. I was told they were largest contributors, but didn’t care! You know why? Because bitterness and discouragement left with them! The church had a new sense of joy and revival. Sadly, yr. later divorced.
C. Applic: You and I cannot carry bitterness in our lives w/o resulting in significant consequences. We’ll be tormented in our spirit and may make harmful decisions based on flawed and faulty reasoning.
III. 3rd: There is Hope for the One Who’s Life is Consumed by/Bitterness.
A. There is Good News! Lost ground can be regained by those in Christ.
1. However, lost ground is retaken the same way it is lost – one step at a time!
a. Illust – Some of the most costly and devastating battles of WWI – The Somme, Verdun, Ypres, 10’s of 1000s of men were killed, even 100,000’s killed with the borders or terrain being controlled only shifting a few hundred yards per sector. Each inch of land was slogged for, won, and attempted to be held at the cost of lives.
b. I don’t know what your experience has been, but I know in my own life, that if I want to have a fruitful, productive, garden, I need to take the time and the steps to systematically weed. If I simply go out and pull a weed here and chop at a plant there, I find that I really haven’t changed the look of the plot of land at all. This is how we often are in our Christian lives when we don’t want to take the time to make repentance complete and full. If you and I are to gain victory over bitterness in our lives, and if we’re going to see the Lord take back terrain in our souls long under enemy occupation, we will need more than a moment or two of weeding out bitterness.
2. What can I do to make sure I am not living under the influence of bitterness?
a. Let’s look at Eph. 4:26-32 to see 3 actions to take in order to walk in Christ’s victory over bitterness in our lives:
1st – v. 30 – “do not grieve the Holy Spirit” – The HS is the third Person of the Trinity. He is indwelling every believer, and as a Person He can be grieved. We grieve the Spirit with ungodly/sinful actions, thoughts, or attitudes. Quenches fellowship w/the Father. b. v. 31 – “put away” – take an active step in putting away – When all the kids were at home one thing I was constantly saying – “take care of or put away what you get out!” – listen, in Eph. 4 we see Paul telling Ephesians to put away – “bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander, malice.” – Listen, do you get angry? Bitter? Sometimes it is an emotion that simply overwhelms us. Not intentionally attempting to hurt others. Sometimes at night, walk through house, or go into one of the kids’ rooms. Walking in the dark and wham or thud or crunch or… Ow!!! Someone was careless and another got hurt. Put away your hurts and offenses!
b.3rd action Paul states is to (v.32) “be kind and forgive one another.” – You know what I have noticed over time – kindness results in more kindness. Rudeness results in more rudeness. Anger results in more anger. Man reaps what sows. Now, no matter how carefully I till and plant, weeds appear. Is there a “weed fairy” that come sin the night be a bane to my garden? No. Just a part of life. Part of the curse on the ground. (Read Gen. 3:17-18) Maybe when pulling out thistle I should say: ”Thanks Adam!” But do you know what? In that passage we see the same hope for the soil is the hope for our soul: (Read Gen. 3:15) The hope for both is Jesus! The redeemed earth will be thistle free, the redeemed soul can be free from the thistles of bitterness. Christ alone is the hope for bitterness!
B. Make Sure to Take the Positive Step of Understanding and Apply Mercy.
1. Don’t wait to forgive until you feel like it, you probably never will.
a. Illust – Dr. Neil Anderson: “Feelings take time to heal after the choice to forgive is made and Satan has lost his place. Freedom is what will be gained, not necessarily a feeling. The feeling may be immediate or may come in time. What is critical is for you to be free from the past right now! Don’t say: “Lord help me to forgive…” he is already helping you. Also, don’t say: “Lord I want to forgive,” because you are by-passing the hard-core choice to forgive which is your responsibility.
b. When you forgive an individual from the heart, those individuals no longer have any control over you. Then, you take the step to release that person to the Lord and you renounce your right to seek revenge and allow Christ to heal your wounded emotions. One of most helpful things could do is ask Lord to bring to mind those events, individuals, etc. that resulted in your being bitter and asking the Lord in prayer to take that pain away. To forgive.
2. Apply mercy to others because you have received mercy, and realize that God is using this person or event in your life to demonstrate God’s sovereign will.
C. Applic: How do you deal with situations that could potentially lead to bitterness? Does your reaction point people to what is eternally true or to what are my petty, temporal, offenses?
Conclusion: Martin Rinkert was a minister in the little town of Eilenburg in Germany, some 350 years ago.
He was the son of a poor coppersmith, but somehow, he managed to work his way through an education. Finally, in the year 1617, he was offered the post of Archdeacon in his hometown parish. A year later, what has come to be known as the Thirty-Years-War broke out. His town was caught right in the middle. In 1637, the massive plague that swept across the continent hit Eilenburg... people died at the rate of fifty a day and the man called upon to bury most of them was Pastor Martin Rinkert. He performed 8,000 funerals, including his wife. His labors finally came to an end about 11 years later, just one year after the conclusion of the war. His ministry spanned 32 years, all but the first and the last overwhelmed by the great conflict that engulfed his town. Tough circumstances in which to be thankful. But he managed. And he wrote these words as a hymn “Now thank we all our God, With heart and hands and voices; Who wondrous things hath done, In whom His world rejoices. It takes a magnificent spirit to come through such hardship and express gratitude. Here is a great lesson. Surrounded by tremendous adversity, thanksgiving to Christ will deliver you from the weeds of bitterness that can kill you.
