What We Leave Behind
Father’s Day 2022
Scriptures: Titus 2:2; Philippians 2:5-13; First Corinthians 11:1
The word Legacy is defined as “something transmitted by or received from an ancestor or predecessor or from the past.” The word was first used in the 15th century and was associated with a heritage or inheritance. When we think of legacy we think of it as something passed on from one generation to another which could be anything from material things to a reputation; habits to specific ways of doing things, to historical knowledge about the family. We sometimes ask people what they would like their legacy to be – how they would like to be remembered – based on the things that they were doing in this life. One of the key components of a legacy is that it is often referred to after a person dies. I have shared with you many times that for those who die in Christ they transition from one state of being to another. Their new state is one without pain, worries, doubts and confusions, which are left behind when they leave their earthly vessels behind. In their new state there is joy and peace. Based on this understanding, we have funerals that celebrate the life of a person and often talk about their legacy. We ask their children if they will follow in their father’s or mother’s footsteps depending on the situation. We speak of all the things they accomplished, especially those things that had an impact on the lives of others. We speak as if what they had done is now over because they are no longer physically here. But is that correct?
The title of my message this morning is “What We Leave Behind.” But I first want to say to the fathers who are present and/or watching this live-streamed video and who might be reading this message later, “Happy Father’s Day!” Being a good father is one of the most important assignments that a man has here on earth because he is responsible for a life other than his own. Of all the things I have accomplished with my time here on earth, I hope to stand before God and hear Him say “Your children thought you were a good father and so do I.” That being said, I want my daughters to know how much I have been blessed to be their father as that outweighs everything else I’ve done. And to all of my “adoptive” kids, I am blessed to be a father figure in your life as I too had other “fathers” who sowed seed into my life. I will acknowledge one of my father figures this morning in this message and I hope he knows that what he has done for me was not done in vain!
I am dedicating this Father’s Day message to my Uncle Robert – my father’s brother and one of my father figures. He is a man in his eighties who truly loves the Lord. This man is someone who I have looked up to for many years because of how he has lived his life. While he is not perfect, he truly allows the love of God to flow through him which dictates his responses to situations where others would just respond out of their flesh. My uncle Robert has lived long enough to witness the goodness of the Lord and give the testimony “I have been young and now I am old, yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken or his descendants begging bread.” (Psalm 37:25) I am dedicating this message to my uncle because he has helped me become a better man and a better father and he did so without even knowing it – well until this morning that is. As I said, my uncle is physically older now, in his mid-eighties, but he doesn’t know it. Yes his body is frailer than it used to be as he has aged – he talked about his brother Arth Ritis on our call Saturday as he spoke about how he was doing – but his spirit is as young as ever. At his current age he understands and can again testify to “…..but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day.” (Second Corinthians 4:16) This is who my uncle is as a child of God! Although I am dedicating this message to my uncle, I must also share a little about my father too. I mean how can you not talk about your father on Father’s Day?
I said earlier that when someone dies and we talk about their legacy, we often speak as if what they had done is now over. I asked if that statement was correct. I do not believe that it is. When we leave this world what we have deposited into people’s lives by how we lived our lives remains and, New Light, that’s the true legacy – for each one of us. There is a lot of focus today about creating generational wealth and I get that, but what I am talking about this morning is more important than generational wealth. You see, if you are like me and you are doing some things “as your father did them” then you are walking in your father’s footsteps as I am walking in my father’s and my father figures’ footsteps. Two of these men, my birth father and his brother, Uncle Robert, never stood in the pulpit or preached the word of God as a “minister.” They never worked in the industry I retired from or held the same positions that I have had. So you might be wondering how could I possibly be walking in the footsteps of these two men and I will explain it. Let me begin with my Daddy.
If I think of the word legacy by its definition, my father did not leave a legacy behind that many people would know about. He was not well known outside of his hometown. He did not develop some break-through technology that earned him praise and recognition. My father told me once that the most money he ever made in one year before retiring was a little over $45,000. Daddy was never rich as we count riches. He was not the most educated man of the city; as a matter of fact he dropped out of school; lied about his age so that he could enter into the military; and later completed his GED. After faithfully serving his country, he received an honorable discharge from the army and immediately joined the Tennessee National Guard where he served until he retired. (Daddy, I thank you for your service. I was proud to walk in your footsteps when I joined the military.) Only his relatives or the people who knew my father best would possibly know this about him. If you Googled his name, you’d find very little if anything about him. I am sharing this so that you understand that, from a world’s view, my father did not leave much of a “legacy” as some would define it. But they would be wrong.
The fact that each of you are sitting here today or watching this on live-stream (or reading this message via email) speaks to my father’s legacy – his choice to leave something of himself with all of his children. You see, we grew up in a home where we were expected to know the Lord. It was not left up to us to find Him by accident; it was a guarantee that we would have a formal introduction to Him and the choice would be ours to accept Him or not. But, while we were under the age of eighteen and living in his house, we would go to Church – PERIOD! My father taught me many lessons, some of which I am still growing in my understanding of because he did not teach me in the traditional way. He would not sit down and say let’s talk about the Bible, but he would tell me things that he understood and why he did some of the things he did. He lived his faith. I am going to say that again Church – my father lived his faith. He lived his faith so that we would have something to look back on if we ever wondered “why.”
I have shared with you on several occasions that it was my father who taught me “how” to visit the sick as he would take me with him when I was young. After I entered the ministry, whenever I was home he would tell me he was going to visit so and so in the hospital and/or nursing home and although he would not always ask me to go, I volunteered to go because it pleased him. It didn’t dawn on me at the time that I was actually doing ministry work with my father! When he was sick he would sometimes tell me who was in hospital or nursing home and I would go alone representing both of us. But as long as he could go, even when he was sick, he went. I am standing before you today because of the parents that I had; parents who lived their faith in their actions every day. They were not perfect, but they loved the Lord and did not hide their love of Him from us. My father never worried about his “legacy” because that was not his focus. What he did want was for each of us to know the Lord so that we would one day have a reunion with Christ and him when we left this earth.
Today my uncle Robert continues to be a father figure to me. I have a great deal of respect and love for my uncle. Although he has his own kids, I’d like to believe that I have eased my way into his heart without displacing one of his own. My uncle is a man who truly fulfills what Paul said to Titus of older men. He said, “Older men are to be temperate, dignified, sensible, sound in faith, in love, in perseverance.” (Titus 2:2) This is who my uncle is now, but as far as I can remember, this is who he has always been. I remember when I was a teenager this verse was put on display in an interaction I had with him. As was my norm during my teenage years, I got mad about something and walked out of the Church. My uncle, who was an usher and a deacon with Sunday responsibilities, left his post and followed me outside. While I do not remember what I was mad about, I do remember the lesson he taught me while we stood outside the Church. First he checked my attitude without any anger or hostility in his voice – that was temperance. Then he told me how my Christianity was on display for all to see because I demonstrated it in how I lived and acted. That was being sound in faith. In his actions he showed that he loved me and then he invited me to come back inside. But he did not wait for my answer. He turned around and walked back into Church knowing that at some point I would follow. He had sown seeds into my life at that moment in time that is still flourishing. That was perseverance – he never gave up on me. But it was not just me that he demonstrated his love to. My brother Barry shared something with me about Uncle Robert that says a lot about how much he loves his family. Barry and Doris were living in Tennessee at the time but had planned a trip to Ohio. Uncle Robert and his wife, Virginia, lived in West Virginia, about two hours away from the place Barry was going to. He wanted to spend some time with Barry and Doris, so he and Aunt Virginia drove that distance to see them. Most uncles would wait for the nephew to come to them since they were the elder, but not my uncle. His daughters have shared many examples with me about their love for their father. During one of our Saturday family calls, my cousin Vivian told the story how she hated his “lectures” when she got in trouble because she hated that she had disappointed him. Can you imagine the love that a child has for their father when they are hurt when they disappoint them? I understand as this is sort of what I felt when he talked to me in the Church parking lot. This is the same love we should have for God when we disappoint Him. My uncle has been a part of my life since the day I was born but I really got to know who he was after that incident in the Church parking lot and I have never been disappointed.
My father’s legacy lives within me. My uncle’s legacy lives within me because he is still sowing seeds into my life. I do not believe that someone has to be dead before they can have a “legacy” because our legacy, good or bad, starts developing as soon as we impact the life of someone else and that is why being a good father is so very important. Do you know that even though our spirits leave our bodies when we die, our life imprint will remain here as long as someone is carrying forth in the things that we implanted within them – the seeds we sown? If you are currently living in the teachings of someone who is now in the presence of God, those individuals are still having an impact in this world through you. What they left behind were seeds that are growing through you. The seeds that they sowed are still producing fruit. The saddest life is that life which is lived through adulthood and impacts no one in a positive manner and we see that happening all the time. This is not what Christ died for. Turn with me to Philippians chapter two. Let’s begin reading at verse five.
“Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, 6. Who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7. but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. 8. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. 9. For this reason also, God highly exalted Him, and bestowed on Him the name which is above every name, 10. so that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow, of those who are in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11. and that every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. 12. So then, my beloved, just as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your salvation with fear and trembling; 13. for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure. (Philippians 2:5-13)
In verse five Paul says “Have this attitude in yourselves….” What “attitude” was he talking about? He was talking about the attitude of Christ; thinking like Christ thought; believing like Christ believed; and acting like Christ acted! We must bear a resemblance to His life if we are to have the benefit of His death. Do you understand this? When I lived at home, I had all of the benefits of being my Father’s son. He provided for my every need. But it came at a price. I had to abide by his rules. I had to go, or not go as the case may be, where he approved. I had to talk the way he wanted me to talk, at least while I was in his presence. There was no cussing or going off on my parents when I was a child. When I was out in public, I had to act in such a way that I would not be an embarrassment to him or my mother after the fact. Everything that I did was a reflection on them and they took it seriously. All of these things I have mentioned are what Paul was talking about as it relates to Christians having the attitude of Christ. I chose to take on the attitude(s) of my father while I lived in his house and because I took on his attitude(s) I enjoyed the benefits that came with living with him. Even as I was enjoying those benefits, I understood that when I grew old enough to “make my own decisions and live like I wanted to live” I could move out and it was not based on my age. At any point that I chose not to live by his “attitude” (standard) I had the choice to move out and he would actually help me pack (at least that is what he told me once.) Even if I was ten years old and decided that I wanted to live like I wanted and I no longer had to abide by his rules (attitude) I could leave. What is important here is that my father, who loved me dearly, loved me enough to stand his ground. He loved me enough to make me choose his attitude if I wanted to enjoy the benefits that I received by his working to provide for me.
I saw the same attitude in my uncle – maybe because they grew up with the same standard from their mother. My uncle has standards and it applies across the board. My uncle will tell you that he has made his mistakes, but the one thing he has not relinquished is his faith and his standards about how a Christian is supposed to live. Uncle Robert stands by what he believes and he does not make excuses for others who don’t! He tells us all the time that if you going to be a Christian you must live like one. Some Christians want all of the benefits of being in a relationship with Christ with none of the responsibility of having His attitude. It does not work that way. If we are to enjoy the benefits, we must take on His mindset. It is sad when I see parents trying to negotiate with their children about certain things as if their children were on the same level as them. This mentality is also in the Church as we try and negotiate with God about what we should or should not be doing regardless of what His word says. My father and uncle were not mean to us, but they had a standard and they had an expectation. When we messed up they called us out on it and continued to love us. They never gave up on us choosing to believe that while we might have missed one mark, there were many more that we would hit if given the love and support we needed to continue.
In verses six through eight Paul goes on to describe what Christ’s mindset was. He talked about Christ taking on the mindset of His Father and living like His Father wanted Him to live. In verse eight he says “Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” (Vs. 8) Paul says that Jesus humbled Himself and was obedient, even unto death, and not just any death, but the worse death available at the time, the death on a cross. This was a slow agonizing death and yet He endured it in obedience to His Father but for our benefit.
Christ lives today and His Spirit can operate within us, but this benefit comes with a price. When we take on His mindset, He is actively involved in what is happening because we are thinking and acting just as He has taught us. My birth father is still alive and having an impact in this world because I am still operating by some of the things that he taught me. My uncle, although he is alive and lives in another state, he is having an impact in Kansas because of the knowledge I gather from him during our weekly calls. Although my father has transitioned to heaven and my uncle is here, I do not want to tarnish either of their names by the choices I make in this life. This way of thinking on my part is actually taking on their mindset – I am thinking like them in some regard. I am making the same decisions that they would have made in a similar situations. This is what Paul was talking about when he said we should take on the mind of Christ. Christ was obedient and therefore we should be obedient. Christ was obedient to God; we should therefore be obedient to God. Paul says in First Corinthians 11:1 “Be ye imitators of me, just as I also am of Christ.” In other words, “follow me as I follow Christ” or “imitate what I do as long as I am imitating Christ!” When I or any other church leader stops following Christ we should stop following them!” If I stop following Christ, you should stop following me. Can you imagine what would happen if Christians stopped following their leaders when their leaders stopped following Christ? I am not taking about our political leaders who live by their own agenda; I am talking about Church leaders who are supposed to direct everyone to Christ. We must command a certain way of walking if we are going to follow anyone. A few years ago I read on Facebook a post on one of my friend’s page where the poster was just cussing away about what they have the right to do. What is interesting is that the day before this same person had wrote a post about walking in faith. How can we do what we want to do and still claim to walk in faith? Although the two posts were contradictory of each other one of the person’s friends responded with the word “Preach” being in agreement with what the person had written. All I could do was shake my head.
Paul goes on to say “So then, my beloved, just as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure." (Vss. 12-13) Paul makes an interesting statement here that I want you to think about. He says that they have always obeyed, not just when he was in their presence, but more so “now” that he was not in their presence. Remember earlier I talked about things I will not do not because of the things my parents taught me? This is what Paul was talking about – obedience when you’re not being watched. It is easy to obey when someone is standing over you and making you do it; but a child of God is taught to obey even when there is no one around to ensure that they are doing it. Obedience is not slavery, it is a choice. I chose to obey my father when he was alive and I am still obeying him now. Likewise, I chose to obey my mother when she was alive and I am still obeying her now.
It costs something to be a father. You have to be a man that stands for something and are willing to make your children choose. You understand that initially their lives are in your hands but at some point they get to decide how they will live. Between those initial days of them being under your authority, in your house and the time they move out, you must provide them with the training and direction they need to be able to walk with Christ. Fathers must lead by examples both in what they say and more importantly how they live. I thank God for my parents. I thank God for my father. I thank God for my uncle Robert. I thank God for all of the other men who were father figures to me. They taught me more about being a man of God than any of the pastors that I have sat under. My father lived a life that made me proud to be called his son. My uncle lives a life that makes me proud to be called his son (or nephew if any of his children get offended.) Neither man was/is perfect, but I know that they loved God. I know they did and continue to do their best to live for Him.
But I want to leave you with this. I have talked about walking in my father and uncle’s footsteps. I talked about the two of the men who drastically impacted my life. Both of these men had the same Father, not natural father, but spiritual Father. Both of these men walked and continue to walk in their Father’s footsteps which made it easier for me. Because of the choices I made, my birth father and my uncle Robert are now my brothers. Sound bad? It’s not. You see, they walked in the footsteps of God. They became children of God and they walked as God would have them to walk as best as they could. I had the gift of having a father and father figures who all believed in and walked with God. I had earthly examples of good fathers which made it easier to accept the fact that my heavenly Father is also a good Father. I am walking in the footsteps of all of my fathers who came before me because this is what they left me – footsteps pointing to Christ as the way to God. So at the age of 61, I am walking in God’s footsteps because those are the steps that were left for me and are continuing being left for me.
Fathers, what legacy are you leaving behind for your children. Is it a legacy of money, generational wealth, etc. or is your legacy footsteps leading your descendants to Christ? What are you leaving behind for your children? When you take a step and you leave a print – where is the print leading towards? It does not matter if your natural father was a good one or not; you have a Godly one who will never fail you. If you want to the benefits of being in a relationship with God, look at His Son and follow Him.
Uncle Robert, happy Father’s day! I love you and thank you for everything you have implanted in me through the years and what you continue to implant during our weekly calls. You will never know on this side the impact you have had on my life and the lives of others – but the day will come when you will understand. I wish each and every father a very blessed Father’s Day. God bless!
Until next time, “The Lord bless you and keep you. May the Lord make His face shine on you and be gracious to you. May the Lord lift up His countenance on you and give you peace.” (Numbers 6:24-26)
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