Recently, the New York Times ran an article entitled, “America’s Mothers Are in Crisis: Is Anyone Listening to Them?” As part of their research, they set up a “Primal Scream Line” for mothers across the country to call and leave a one-minute message. Hundreds of moms responded with shouts, cries, guttural screams, and lots of expletives. I listened to many of these messages. Here are a few…
• I’m doing my sixth load of laundry today!
• There is just so much talking. Talking all the time. All day long. Words. Words. Words. So much talking. I just, I need no more talking. No more words. I need no more. No more. So much talking. I just need silence. Please. Silence!
• Maybe I’m not cut out to be a mother!
• All I hear all the livelong day is ‘Mom, mom, MOM! Mom, MOMMMM,
MOM, mom!! MoM, mommommommom, MOMMM!!’ Aaaaah!!
• I don’t know how to feel sane again. I’m stuck in this position for God knows how much longer!
Moms, its ok to scream because God hears you. It’s my prayer you will be reminded of this truth: You are not stuck but are in a position to fulfill God’s purposes.
We’re continuing in our series called “Re.” We began with Resurrection on Easter Weekend. Two weeks ago, Jason Crosby helped us see our need for Renewal. Last weekend, Pastor Kyle and the student ministry urged us to seek Revival.
Our topic today is Rededicate.
• In the Bible, “dedicate” means, “to initiate or inaugurate consecration.” It has the idea of setting apart persons or things to God. One example is found in Leviticus 22:2: “Speak to Aaron and his sons so that they abstain from the holy things of the people of Israel, which they dedicate to me, so that they do not profane my holy name: I am the LORD.” In addition, “dedicate” refers to “training up,” like a parent is to do according to Proverbs 22:6: “Train up a child in the way he should go…”
• The prefix “re” means, “to return something to its original state, to experience again by repetition.”
It’s my prayer for God to use His Word to help mothers, and all of us, to become rededicated to His plans and purposes. We could state it like this: Regardless of your role, rededicate yourself to God’s redemptive purposes.
While Mother’s Day is happy for many, for others, your mother is no longer here. Or maybe you have a rough relationship with your mom, and you struggle with all the syrupy sentiments in Hallmark cards. Perhaps your mom is very sick, and you wonder how much longer she’s going to be with you. Maybe you’re a single dad hurting for your kids as you watch them struggle. Some of you have experienced the devastating loss of a child through abortion, a miscarriage, or through an untimely death.
There are mothers here who wish they didn’t have kids and I know there are women who would give anything just to have a child. Others of you are grieving the direction your prodigal child is taking. Many moms are gripped with guilt and swimming in shame because they think they’re not doing a good job. Some of you are searching for equilibrium in your role as a foster mom or a stepmom. In addition, some of you are flying solo as you work hard to nurture your child’s faith without the support of the child’s dad.
Let me be quick to say if you aren’t married or don’t have children, you are not inferior. Womanhood is not only about marriage and children. Your worth goes far beyond your marital status or whether you have kids.
I want to give a “shout-out” to those of you who are raising young children. Some of you are battling bedtimes and wondering when all the whining is going to stop. You’re juggling schedules, running on emotional empty, and feel like screaming. Many of you are living out Proverbs 31:15: “She rises while it is yet night…”
It’s not my intention to add to your struggles as a mom, because many of you are already overwhelmed. According to a study from 2021, 93% of mothers feel burned out, at least occasionally.
Would you take a deep breath and listen to these comforting words from the Good Shepherd in Isaiah 40:11? “He will tend His flock like a shepherd; He will gather the lambs in his arms; He will carry them in His bosom, and gently lead those that are with young.” May you know the sweet gentleness of the Shepherd as He leads you to love the little lambs in your care.
Please turn to the Book of Deuteronomy. Let’s set the scene. The people of God have been doing laps in the wilderness for 40 years and are now ready to enter Wisconsin, I mean, the Promised Land. The generation which had disobeyed has died and now “generation next” is on the scene.
In chapter 5, God gave them the 10 Commandments, but He wanted them to know He wasn’t just interested in external behavior as we see in 5:29: “Oh that they had such a heart as this always, to fear me and keep all my commandments, that it might go well with them and with their descendants forever!”
Surprisingly, in chapter 6, Moses doesn’t give them instructions on farming, shepherding, economics, building their houses, or even battle plans. What is first and foremost on his mind, and on God’s heart, is the family’s role in faith formation.
We’re going to see two requirements and three responsibilities for parents.
Requirements for Parents
1. Reverence for God. We see this in verses 1-2: “Now this is the commandment—the statutes and the rules—that the LORD your God commanded me to teach you, that you may do them in the land to which you are going over, to possess it, 2 that you may fear the LORD your God, you and your son and your son’s son, by keeping all his statutes and his commandments, which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be long.”
Jump down to verse 4: “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.” This is the beginning of the Jewish Shema, which literally means, “Hear,” or we might say, “Listen up!” It can also mean “to listen intelligently and attentively; to obey.” The Shema is a declaration of faith, a pledge of allegiance to the Almighty. It was recited when rising in the morning and when going to bed at night. It was the first prayer a Jewish child was taught to pray, and it was the last thing a Jew would pray prior to death.
The full Shema is contained in verses 4-9 and is a call to live and love God in order to leave this love with our children.
It’s been said many Christians are functional atheists, living as though there is no God. I would argue we’re more like functional polytheists, living as though there are many gods, who we give ourselves to. Brothers and sisters, there is only one God, and He is totally unique, not some vague pantheistic force. As such, we’re called to reverence Him.
Check out verse 3: “Hear therefore, O Israel, and be careful to do them, that it may go well with you and that you may multiply greatly as the Lord, the God of your fathers has promised you, in a land flowing with milk and honey.” It’s one thing to learn something; it’s another thing to live it out. When I’m “careful to do” there will be harmony between my life and my lips. It’s not enough to just know information – it must lead to personal transformation.
That reminds me of what happened one Sunday after a Child Dedication service (we have five dedications this weekend). As a young family drove away from church after the dedication of their baby, little Johnny, the older brother, cried all the way home in the back seat. His mother asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, “The pastor said he wanted us to be brought up in a Christian home…and I want to stay with you guys!” Ouch.
If you want your kids brought up in a Christian home, make sure Christ is at home in your heart because kids have a radar system for hypocrisy and empty religion. Someone said it like this: “If you wish your children to be Christians you must really take the trouble to be Christians yourselves.”
Regardless of your role, rededicate yourself to God’s redemptive purposes. The first requirement to is have reverence for God. The second is to have a relationship with God.
2. Relationship with God. Verse 4 says He is to be “our” God because He is personal and relational. Verse 5 continues with a challenge to love God with everything we’ve got: “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” Jesus quoted this verse in Mark 12:30 and called it the greatest commandment. Our love is to be whole-hearted and is to pervade every aspect of our life because God wants our exclusive and intensive devotion.
The term, “with all your heart” is used 21 times in the Bible and always refers to our relationship with God. God alone, and only God, is to have the primary, all-encompassing loyalty of our hearts.
Notice the three uses of the word “all.” God’s whole-hearted love for us cannot be answered with half-hearted commitment from us. By listing the heart, soul, and might, no area is left out. The word “might” can be translated as “with our much-ness.” We’re to love Him with everything we have – with devotion in our hearts, with passion in our souls, and with the energy of our very lives.
Verse 6 reminds us God’s Word needs to be in our hearts, not just our heads: “And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart.” One pastor said it this way: “If you want your children to have a heart for God, you must first get God’s Word into your own heart and then pour God’s Word into your child’s heart.”
Regardless of your role, rededicate yourself to God’s redemptive purposes.
Faith is both caught and taught. Now, let’s look at three responsibilities for moms and dads.
Responsibilities for Parents
1. Teach truth intentionally. We see this in the first part of verse 7: “You shall teach them diligently to your children.” God’s design is for parents to be the primary propagators of God’s truth to the young disciples dwelling in their home. The phrase “teach them diligently” literally means “to sharpen” or to “teach incisively.” It’s the idea of going over and over repeatedly until the knife is razor sharp. It also means to use pressure to leave a mark in the mind or memory. “Diligent” speaks of “exhibiting care and conscientiousness in one’s work or duties.”
We’re not to just throw our faith out as an option for our kids. Rather, we’re to take it so seriously we intentionally look for ways to precisely pass along what we are learning which is reinforced by how we are living. We are to talk about God’s Word 24-7. The task of teaching is a never-ending, full-time assignment.
Would you notice whose responsibility this is? Look at this clause again: “You shall teach them diligently to your children.” This task is not for the church to fulfill but for moms and dads to faithfully follow. The church is meant to supplement what is done in the home.
I enjoy hearing kids retell Bible stories. I came across some statements shared in a Sunday School: “Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without any ingredients. The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the Ten Amendments. The First Commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple. The Fifth Commandment is to humor thy father and mother. Moses died before he reached Canada. Then Joshua led the Hebrews in the battle of Geritol. The greatest miracle in the Bible is when Joshua told his son to stand still, and he obeyed him. David…fought with the Finkelsteins. Solomon, one of David’s sons, had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.”
First, we’re to teach truth intentionally – that’s the “how.” Our second responsibility is to talk truth relationally – that covers the “when” and “where.”
2. Talk truth relationally. Look at the last part of verse 7: “…Talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” We are to make an impression upon our children by talking about God when we’re sitting at home, walking along the road, at bedtime and in the morning. The basic idea is we don’t preach at them but reach them by showing how God relates to everyday life. Jesus did this all the time as He drew illustrations from birds, flowers, sheep, and even pigs.
Eternal truths are most effectively taught in the loving environment of a God-fearing home that is life-oriented, not guilt-driven. I like how Pastor Kyle put it last weekend: “Change and growth must be awe-inspired (long-term), not guilt-driven (short-term).” Notice this should be more than just getting them up for church once a week, but it certainly involves that.
The basic idea is to capitalize on the normal rhythm of day-to-day life, leveraging “teachable moments” for the sake of our children. I had mixed success doing this. Sometimes I got it right, like when Megan was making scrambled eggs one day and commented that the eggs were very fragile. I told her eggs are like our hearts – very fragile and easy to break. Later, Beth pointed to a verse we used to have over our kitchen sink from Proverbs 4:23: “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”
One author offers his take on what Moses was telling the people: “If you are going to impress these truths in the hearts of your children, you will have to be more deliberate about creating a rhythm within your home. In the future, there will be a host of things that will distract you, and it will be easy to drift away from the importance of having an everyday kind of faith.”
Let’s look more closely at these four natural and normal times to talk truth intentionally.
• Mealtime – “When you sit at home.” What does your home life teach your children? One of the best times to talk with our kids is when we gather for a meal. It’s an optimal opportunity to have a focused discussion. Sadly, according to one study I read, less than a third of families eat meals together at the table. But for those who do, 65% said having dinner together made their family closer.
• Drivetime – “When you walk along the road.” Most of us don’t walk to do our errands or activities, but we are in our cars a lot. One researcher offers this insight, “Often the richest conversations, the moments of genuine intimacy, take place somewhere else, in the car, say, on the way back from soccer at dusk, when the low light and lack of eye contact allow secrets to surface.”
• Bedtime – “When you lie down.” Bedtime rituals can be a very tender time when our kids are open to discuss things they might not share during the busyness of the day. One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mom was tucking her small boy into bed. As she was just about to turn off the light, he asked with a tremor in his voice, “Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?” The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. “I can’t dear,” she said. “I have to sleep with Daddy.” After a long silence the boy replied, “The big sissy. Is he scared too?”
• Morning time – “And when you get up.” Each day is a blank page for the family to start fresh relationally and to plant important seeds in the heart of a child. Just a few encouraging words, a hug, and a prayer together can launch the day off on the right foot.
We are to show our kids who God is, not just in formal spiritual settings, but also in the unhurried casual classroom of everyday life. Look for those teachable moments to make an impression. Be intentional and leverage this natural rhythm to live out God’s purposes. When those times happen, gently introduce God’s perspective by sharing a verse or principle from Scripture.
I like how one pastor put it: “Regardless of where we are or what we are doing, there is to be a constant theme in our conversation with our kids: ‘There is only one God, and we are to honor and serve Him alone by loving Him with all that we are and all that we have…but don’t assume that spiritual training will just happen automatically. You’ve got to have an intentional plan for discipling your children. You need a routine of teaching them the Word…so you will be ready for the teachable moments.”
Regardless of your role, rededicate yourself to God’s redemptive purposes.
3. Transmit truth practically. Verses 8-9 show us the Israelites had visual reminders about God everywhere: “You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”
Many Jews took this literally by putting passages of Scripture into little boxes called phylacteries and attaching them to her hands and foreheads. They also attached mezuzahs containing Deuteronomy 6 to the doors of their homes. God’s Word is to be so central to your family’s life that your kids think about it every time they turn around. The principle here is this: whatever we need to do to remind us of God, we should do it.
One day, Samuel Taylor Coleridge had a guest for dinner who was an atheist. During the meal this man expounded the virtues of freedom of choice and how religion prevented people from being truly free. He was especially upset with how parents train their children in the faith, claiming that kids should be free to believe what they want without any influence from their parents.
After dinner, Coleridge got up and asked his friend to come outside to look at his garden. Coleridge was known as an expert gardener, so his guest was expecting to see beautiful flowers, sculpted shrubbery, and flowering plants. Instead, there were weeds everywhere, out-of-control vines, and overgrown grass. The atheist looked puzzled and said, “What happened to your garden?” Coleridge responded, “Well, I just took your advice. I wouldn’t want to impose myself upon these young vines – I just let them grow like they wanted to.”
Let’s summarize. There are two requirements from this passage:
• Reverence for God
• Relationship with God
And three responsibilities:
• Teach truth intentionally
• Talk truth relationally
• Transmit truth practically
Regardless of your role, rededicate yourself to God’s redemptive purposes. Let’s consider some practical ways to cultivate the souls of our children and grandchildren.
Take-it-Home
1. Evaluate what kind of example you are setting. It’s not that you should be an example to your kids. It’s that you are an example. What sort of example are you?
2. Make dinner time a priority. If you’re having dinner once a week, work at twice a week. If you gather two times, make it four times, and make sure you put the phones away and turn off the TV.
3. Read the “Shema” (Deuteronomy 6:4-9) with your family. Howard Hendricks used to say if he had just one sentence of advice to offer to parents, he would encourage them to drench their minds with Deuteronomy 6:4-9.
4. Figure out your role with each of your children or grandchildren. Beth and I read a helpful article from Focus on the Family many years ago. The basic idea is that our parenting roles need to adjust as our children grow. I don’t have time to explain it fully but here are the four phases:
• Commander
• Coach
• Counselor
• Consultant
5. See discipline as part of discipleship. The root of the word “discipline” is “disciple.” It might be helpful to change your vocabulary when faced with an issue you need to address with your child. Instead of saying, “This is a discipline situation I need to deal with,” it’s more helpful to say, “This is a discipleship situation.” Every discipline situation is a setting for discipleship.
6. See motherhood as your mission. In her book, The Missional Mom, Helen Lee writes: “Moms need to explore the idea of calling and understand both the specific part God has given them and also how the melody of motherhood fits into the grand symphony of God’s work.” This may help you not to scream.
You don’t have to be a perfect parent because there aren’t any. God is looking for ordinary moms in ordinary circumstances who are faithful in rather ordinary ways. God is at work telling a story of restoration and redemption through your family. Never buy into the myth that you need to become the “right” kind of parent before God can use you in your children’s lives. Instead, learn to cooperate with whatever God desires to do in your heart today so your children will revere Him and have a relationship with Him.
Have you drifted in your discipleship? Have you grown cold, hard, and bitter? Do you need to rededicate yourself to Christ? Moms, dads, and grandparents, it’s time to intentionally live on mission with your children and grandchildren.
Regardless of your role, rededicate yourself to God’s redemptive purposes.
Please close your eyes. Perhaps you feel like screaming or maybe you just feel flat. If you are not yet saved, cry out for Christ to save you. If you’re ready to rededicate yourself, do so right now.
