Opening: A wife complained to her husband about having bad migraines lately. Her husband asked: "Have you taken medicines?" The wife answered, "I took Advil and Excedrin, but they didn't help." Her husband suggested she see her doctor, and she did. When she returned from her doctor, she said, "Honey, my doctor told me I am stressed. To reduce my stress, he told me to go to London, Italy or Paris." And then she asked her husband: "Where should I go?" Her husband replied, "Go to see another doctor!"
Today we will continue to learn about stressors or factors that make us stressed and how to reduce them. But I won't tell you to go to London, Italy or Paris unless you want to go there. Last week we learned about three stressors: 1. Work (Overwork), 2. Guilt, and 3. Unrealistic Expectation. And now, let's continue with another four stressors.
4. Fear of the difficult situation and the future.
Here is some news that I read last week:
- EBT: 60% of Bay Area residents surveyed said they feel more stressed since the pandemic hit, and roughly 1 in 3 people said their mental health has deteriorated over the past five years.
– NYT: Americans are spending a dollar more for a gallon of gasoline than they were a year ago. Natural gas prices have shot up more than 150 percent over the same time, threatening to raise prices of food, chemicals, plastic goods, and heat this winter (If you go to the supermarket, like Ranch 99, you will find that some foods prices have become double).
– Yahoo: Your heating bill could be 50% higher this winter.
– The Daily Article: Rachel Levine was sworn in as America's first transgender four-star admiral last Tuesday, making her the highest-ranking official in the commissioned corps and leader of six thousand Public Health Service officers. The sexual revolution continues to advance in our culture. For example, the Pentagon has spent $15 million in the last five years to treat 1,892 transgender troops, including $11.5 million for psychotherapy and $3.1 million for surgeries, including "sex reassignment" procedures. Our culture has fully embraced Friedrich Nietzsche's edict, "There are no eternal facts as there are no absolute truths."
Getting the news like that affects our emotions. We can be worried, even fearful, thinking about the difficulties ahead or the future of America. We will be stressed because we have no control over those situations. And even though bad news like homicides, human trafficking, wildfires, or natural disasters are probably far from our homes, their vivid coverage in the media may make them seem as if they are more likely to occur than they really are.
What should we do? Should we stop reading and hearing the news to reduce our stress? That may be helpful. I think we should not spend so much time on the news. But as Christians, sometimes we need to know what is going on to be more aware and pray more specifically for the situation for God to intervene. Instead of being fearful and stressed, we entrust our lives into God's hands when we hear all of that bad news. We should believe that God controls everything, including our future, the situation in America, and the world. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will, make straight your paths." When we fully trust in the Lord, we will find peace and strength. Isaiah 26:3 says, "You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you."
Regarding the future, Jesus tells us not to allow the future to stress us out. He told His disciples, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." (Matthew 6:34). So, instead of stressing out about what is going on and lies ahead, let's trust in God, in His love, care, wisdom, and power.
5. Disbelief.
While many Christians know that God cares, they don't believe He really cares for them. This disbelief causes doubt, worry, confusion, and uncertainty when they face problems and challenges in their lives and can become a stressor. For months after Grace got the accident, I remember I was so sad, restless, discouraged, and stressed. Until one night, God spoke to me and asked me if I believe that He loves Grace and Ivan, that He cares for them and allowed the accident happened for a purpose. I was surprised to hear that. Deep in my heart, God knew I questioned His wisdom for what happened to Grace. I asked God why he didn't protect Grace as He did to many other people, why He let Grace suffer so much, etc. But after I asked God's forgiveness and said to Him that I believe He loves Grace and Ivan more than I do. And that I surrender everything to Him, my heavy burden suddenly was gone, and I felt peace. Indeed, I still feel sad, and sometimes I am worried, but I am no longer stressed because I have learned to trust God. Do you still believe that God loves you and cares for you when He has not answered your prayers or when you get sick, or when you experience tragedy in your life?
We need to have faith in all aspects of our lives. We are saved through faith (Ephesians 2:8-10). We are no longer condemned because we believe in Jesus Christ (John 3:18 – "Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God's one and only Son"). Without faith, we cannot please God (Hebrews 11:6 – "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him"). When we pray, we must believe that God will answer our prayers (Mark 11:24 – "Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours"). When we face problems, we also should believe in God (John 14:1 - "Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me").
We need to trust in God like David. He begins Psalm 23 by saying, "The Lord is my shepherd; I lack nothing." (Psalm 23:1). Like a shepherd, the Lord is going to take care of us. He will provide, protect, guide, and correct those who place their trust in Him. When stressed, we should remind ourselves of the truth of who God is and how He cares for us as He tells us in His Word. We know that the Holy Spirit intercedes for us (Romans 8:26–27).
6. Making an important decision.
Making a decision with a serious or life-long consequence can also be a stressor because we don't want to make a wrong decision. We are usually restless, worried, confused, and stressed during the decision. Illustration: Before I graduated from seminary in 1990, several churches invited me to be their pastor. I was planning to serve my childhood church in Semarang. But after I made the decision, the church in Kudus also invited me. Honestly, I didn't want to be the pastor in Kudus because I heard the church was challenging; the members fought a lot and caused church division twice. I was still young and didn't think I was ready to serve that church. But three senior pastors at the conference encouraged me to serve in Kudus. I was confused. I had to pray earnestly, asking God's guidance which church He wanted me to serve. I took a personal retreat for fasting and praying. I remember, on the third day, when I prayed, I heard God speak in my heart this: "The church in Kudus needs a pastor." Therefore, I decided to serve the church there until I officially moved to America in 2006. I thank God for His guidance.
Like I said two weeks ago, stress is a normal response to a change. Making an important decision can bring huge change; therefore, it can be very stressful. I don't know what important decision you need to make today. You or your child are probably struggling to decide which college your child should go to and what major will be taken. Or you probably are struggling to find a husband/wife, a job, or thinking of moving to another place (56% of Bay Area residents plan to move out of the Bay Area in the next few years). Whatever decision you have to make, make sure you have asked God for guidance. God invites us to ask His advice. Jeremiah 33:3 says, "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." Don't be stressed, come to God and He will guide you and show you what is best for you!
7. Wrong perceptions and responses.
How you view the world, or a particular situation can determine whether it causes stress. For example, if your car is stolen and you respond, "It's OK, my insurance company will pay for a new one," you'll be less stressed. But if you think, "They stole my car. What if the thieves come back to my house to steal again?" you will be stressed more because of worrying about things that may never happen. Having the right perspectives is very important to see things correctly, be strong and remain calm, even when facing great difficulties. We need to have, what the apostle Paul calls, the mind of Christ. In 1 Corinthians 2:16b, Paul says, "we have the mind of Christ." Because of that, we see how amazing he responded to the very disappointing situation in his ministry. In Acts 16, we read after Paul and Silas preached the Gospel in Macedonia, they were beaten severely and imprisoned. If they did not have the mind of Christ, they would be complaining to God and so discouraged. They planned to share the Gospel in Asia and Bithynia, but the Holy Spirit and the Spirit of Jesus did not allow them (v. 6 and 7). Then Paul got a vision of a man of Macedonia standing and begging him to come (V. 8). Paul and Silas obeyed and went there, hoping the people would welcome the Gospel. But instead, they were persecuted. In that situation, they praised the Lord. They trusted in the Lord, believing that what happened to them as part of God's plan.
If we have the mind of Christ, we will see and respond to things differently. The mind of Christ will also enable us to see things from the perspective of eternity. Apostle Paul says in Colossians 3:2,4 says, "Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. … When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory." So, even though our situation here on earth does not change, we still hope that God will surely change it one day. Like in the case of Grace, her doctors told Ivan that her TBI and two strokes would cause permanent problems with her health. We will continue to pray for recovery because we believe God can do the miracle. But if her condition does not change, we know that one day God will restore her fully. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. We learn to believe what Paul says in Romans 8:18, "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us."
Closing: We have learned seven stressors and how to deal with them. When you are stressed, ask yourself these questions: - What are the primary sources of your stress? - What do I need to do or change to reduce it? - How am I trusting God with my work, finances, health, relationships, and future? - How often do I pray about the issues in my life causing me stress? Bring your stress to God. Share your burdens, concerns, and needs. When we go to God, we will often gain wisdom about our stress. Remember what Jesus says, "I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)
