God desires to have a personal, intimate, loving, dynamic, and powerful relationship with every person on the planet.
WHAT IS INTIMACY?
To develop an intimate relationship with Jesus, we need to define what that looks like. Some have said that intimacy means "in-to-me-see" and begins by praying the following:
"Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!" (Ps 139:23-24 ESV)
"… please show me now your ways, that I may know you in order to find favor in your sight." (Ex 33:13 ESV)
Intimacy is allowing Jesus to look into our hearts. He prayed that the intimacy He had with Adam in the Garden of Eden would be restored and everyone who receives Him as Lord and Savior would "be one" just as the Father was in Him and He was in the Father;
"The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one, I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me" (John 17:20-23 ESV).
Jesus desired that the love the Father has for Him "may be in them, and I in them." (John 17:26 ESV)
"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him. But we know these things because God has revealed them to us by his Spirit, and his Spirit searches out everything and shows us even God's deep secrets." (1 Cor 2:9-10)
Question: How does a person grow in intimacy with a God they have never seen?
The Apostle Paul asked God, the "Father of Glory" to give every Born-Again Christian "the Spirit of Wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him" so that they would have the "eyes" of their "hearts enlightened" so that they would "know what is the hope to which he "has called" them and "what are the riches of his glorious inheritance" and the "immeasurable greatness of his power" towards them (Eph 1:15-19 ESV). Each of us is implored to "grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ" (2 Pet 3:18 ESV).
The Bible gives us six clues to growing in intimacy with Jesus.
"1 My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you, 2 making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; yes, 3 if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, 4 if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures…" (Prov 2:1-4 ESV)
1. Receive His words
- Read His Word like it's a love letter from a loved one - because it is! If you long to audibly hear His voice read the Bible out loud!
2. Treasure His commands
- Heed the commands. He has given us in His Word so store them up in your heart
3. Intentionally take notice and apply His wisdom
- Choose the wisdom of God and not the wisdom of the world
4. Continually study God's Word for understanding
- Learn how to study His words of life
5. Seek His wisdom like you are looking for lost money or hidden treasure
- Diligently seek His face daily
6. Cry out for insight and understanding
- Pray without ceasing and ask Jesus to illuminate His Word - Spending time with Him in prayer increases your time to explore and understand your actual needs and His desires for you.
When you do these things:
7. "then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding; he stores up sound wisdom for the upright; he is a shield to those who walk in integrity, guarding the paths of justice and watching over the way of his saints." (Prov 2:5-8 ESV)
If you desire to grow in intimacy with Jesus, He can't be just a part of your life. He must be ALL of your life. Human beings don't have the capacity to receive all Jesus has for them because of their pride. Pride caused Angels to be kicked out of Heaven and Adam and Eve to be kicked out of the Garden of Eden - and it will keep you from entering into having deep intimacy with eternal love Himself.
Intimacy is the way to know the heart of Jesus. If you long for deeper intimacy with Him, then you need to:
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths." (Prov 3:5-6 ESV)
The word "trust" (Heb: 'batach') means to entrust to another confidently. The word "understanding" (Heb: 'binah') refers to your logic, intellect, education, experience, knowledge, will, etc. Jesus wants you to stop leaning/relying on your understanding and entrust ALL your ways to Him daily so that He can make your crooked paths straight.
"Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart." (Ps 37:4 ESV)
The word "delight" (Heb: 'anog') means to be soft and pliable before God. Intimacy brings us to a place where His desires become our desires! He will give us the desires of our hearts because He plants those desires within us.
"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied." (Matt 5:6 ESV)
We need to hunger and thirst for the presence of God. We need to cry out to Him like King David and ask, "One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I seek after that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple" (Psalm 27:4 ESV).
Jesus said, "I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst" (John 6:35 ESV).
THE KEY TO INTIMACY
What unlocks the door to becoming intimately closer to Jesus is repentance which removes any obstacle between you and Him (James 4:8-10). Intimacy begins by surrendering your will to His will. Growing in intimacy with Jesus is a life-long process. Each time you acknowledge your failures and faults through repentance, you come emotionally closer to Him.
When you fail and fall before Jesus, your position in Him doesn't change (See John 17:20-23; Gal 2:20). Your position in Him remains the same, but your condition before Him needs to be cleansed daily. Your relationship with Him is like a legal marriage covenant. Your relationship/condition is harmed when you hurt your spouse, but your position remains the same. The only way your marriage could be broken is if a judge granted you a divorce. Jesus has made you His Bride and promised to never divorce you, no matter what (see Heb 13:5).
By acknowledging your wrongdoing and repenting of it, your spouse must forgive you for your relationship to continue growing in intimacy (See Matt 6:14-15; Luke 17:4; Eph 4:31-32; Col 3:13). The greatest mystery of His love is that He hears your every thought, knows everything about you, and still loves you anyway! Even when you are intentionally hiding or running from Jesus, He will come for you because He is a relentless pursuer. He has always been the initiator to have an intimate relationship with Him.
Jesus pursued:
- Adam and Eve after they sinned to restore their relationship with Him (Gen 3:8-9).
- Noah (Gen 6:11-13).
- Abraham (Gen 12:1-3).
- Each of the Prophets (1 Sam 3:1-11).
- The two men on the road to Emmaus (Luke 24:13-27).
- Saul/Paul on the road to Damascus (Acts 9:1-6).
- You - when you received Him as your Lord and Savior (John 3:16).
SELF-EFFORT
Jesus says to you, "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him and he with Me" (Rev 3:20 ESV).
Too many Born-Again Christians focus on being obedient through keeping the Law made up of rules and regulations to gain knowledge of God so they can find acceptance from Him rather than growing in an intimate relationship with Him. Religiously attending church or reading books won't make you grow in intimacy with Jesus. That is called legalism, and the only thing it ever produces is pride. Human beings are "not justified by works of the law but through faith in Jesus Christ" (Gal 2:16 ESV). Christianity is not about anything you can do for Jesus but what He has already done for you.
The greatest danger to intimacy is the rituals and traditions of men. There is nothing that personal effort or good works can do to draw you closer to Jesus. A person does not get to Heaven by keeping rules. Christianity is based on love, not rules. Intimacy doesn't happen by doing lots of things for Jesus but by knowing Him. The secret to greater intimacy with Jesus is learning to focus on Him - breath by breath - and what He has done for each of us - not on what we can do for Him!
"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast." (Eph 2:8-9 ESV)
Obediently sharing Jesus with others and learning about Him through His written Word is not the same as spending time with the author Himself. It is like a married couple having difficulties and spending their time separately reading and studying about how to have a good marriage, yet not taking any time to be with each other and getting to know their spouse more intimately.
Every healthy relationship has two people pursuing each other and intimately relating to one another. Jesus desires that you spend time with Him and intimately communicate with Him, to enjoy fellowship with Him, and trust and follow Him. Intimacy is not automatic but a process that begins on the inside and must be cultivated.
Communication is the key to keeping any relationship vibrant and alive. Growing in an intimate relationship with Jesus increases exponentially by praying continuously without ceasing, which allows the Holy Spirit to guide you into all truth as you study the Bible (John 16:13; 1 Thess 5:17).
INTELLECTUAL PURSUIT
Growing in mental knowledge is not wrong or bad. It can be beneficial for every Born-Again Christian as there will be times it is necessary to live out the life Jesus is calling them to live. However, intellectual knowledge about Him is not the same as an intimate relationship with Him. The head always gets in the way of the heart.
The Bible emphatically says that Jesus will come intimately closer to you if you intentionally desire to come closer to Him (See James 4:8). To get to the place of truly both KNOWING and LOVING Jesus intimately, you must first be willing to humbly pray (and live) the Gethsemane prayer, "Not my will Lord but Yours" then you must carry your cross daily because, at any moment, the Lord may require that a specific area of your life be can be put to death. After he does that you can experience true overcoming resurrection power (Luke 22:44).
The pursuit of knowledge is vital for growth as a disciple of Jesus, along with intimate experiential knowledge. However, the danger of intellectual pursuit without an intimate relationship is that the heart can become cold and brittle like a stone, making knowledge an idol. Jesus has given every Born-Again Christian a metaphorical "new heart of flesh," which is the new understanding of life itself that will cause them "to walk in" His "statutes, and "obey" them" (Ez 36:26-27 ESV).
The motivation to love Jesus and study His Word must come from the heart, the emotional center of a human being, and not just the mind (Matt 22:37). Living the life He desires for you is about obeying Him and studying His Word through the power and operation of the Holy Spirit in your life.
Every Born-Again Christian is implored to diligently study and rightly divide God's written Word (2 Tim 2:15). All Scripture is "given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work" (2 Tim 3:16-17 NKJV). The only effective way to do that is to intentionally study the Bible by using both the new heart of flesh and the mind of Christ you have been given (1 Cor 2:16).
Both the intellectual and experiential pursuit of Jesus must be grounded in prayer because it is the fundamental element of relationship with Him in the life of the Born-Again Christian. It is an act of worship, the communion of the soul with God - Spirit with spirit - the saved with the Savior. It is both wrestling with God and resting peacefully in His arms.
CONCLUSION
Intimacy with your Creator is the highest purpose for which human beings were created. The Bible makes it clear that a person can know Jesus intimately. The intimacy of divine embrace is far deeper than between two lovers. Are you passionately in love with Jesus? If not, do you want to be? If the answer is yes, ask the Holy Spirit to relight the flame of passionate love within your heart for Jesus.
If you desire to have a deeper and intimate relationship with Jesus, the only way to begin is to come to a place of total desperation, self-abandonment, and surrender to Him through prayer. The ultimate goal of prayer is to have intimate union and dialogue with the Triune God. Prayer is the application of the heart to Jesus and the eternal exercise of love.
The life of King David was both a picture of success and failure. He even committed adultery and murder, yet the Bible calls him a man after God's own heart because of three things he did daily:
1. He did whatever God wanted him to do
2. He meditated on His Laws
3. He spoke to God with a repentant heart filled with praise and adoration
(See Acts 13:22; Psalm 51:1-2; 119:47-48)
The underlying desire of David's heart throughout his life is revealed in the following Scriptures:
"As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God." (Psalm 42:1-2 ESV)
"O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary, beholding your power and glory. Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you." (Psalm 63:1-3 ESV)
"How lovely is your dwelling place, O Lord of hosts! My soul longs, yes, faints for the courts of the Lord; my heart and flesh sing for joy to the living God." (Psalm 84:1-2 ESV)
Let's pray and make this prayer your own:
"Lord, I need a radical encounter with You. I need to decrease so that you will increase in my life. I need You to come in and break through all the religious trappings of needing to work things out. I need you to invade the very core of my life. I long to move in Your wisdom and counsel. I desire to walk mightily in the power of Your Spirit so I can dramatically affect those I come in contact with. Teach me how to seek deeper intimacy with You. Please show me the areas in my life that need to change. Amen."
