1. Be your own master! Own yourself! Whoever came up with that word accountability? Everyone and everything should account to you but you don’t report to anyone after all, what they know. Think of the possibilities. Just meditate deeply, or if that’s too much work see a shrink or some eastern new age guru who can get you demon possessed so you don’t have to do anything.
Be your own master, after all you got yourself out of sticky situations using your sheer genius and might. This person who began this religion business should be taken to a mental institution. But again there is a god and it’s ,yeah you guessed it.. you!
2. Create your master in your mind then make an image of it, the more precious stones on it the better, the more you pay for it the better too, while at it…look for a wandering spirit to inhabit it, for signs and wonders then bow and worship it. The best god/master so far is money, followed by power and fame. .even the bible says that money opens all doors. .doesn’t it.
Ok, so money’s not your thing, best news, anything or anyone can be master, even you..CELEBRATE! CELEBRATE!
Next step, tout your god/master, elevate him, get him worshipers, accredit him with wonders and suggest to others either forcefully or non forcefully to worship him.
And don’t forget to get I mean pay a celebrity to endorse this master/god.
3. Make promises you wont keep, ok, say things you don’t mean, lay your hands on the bible or lift them to heaven and say exactly the opposite of the truth.. wow, you really are good at this! Any way the courts and governments are full of lying, cheating crooks and they seem to be getting the best of everything so why cant you have a shot at the pie, all of it for your glorious self, why not? Oh, this great muscle called the tongue, better than the sword whether written or spoken.. and it can never be recalled. If need be you will issue an apology but won’t mean it one bit. You’ll just tell them what they want to hear, and they will believe it.. after all you are god. Don’t forget to get lessons from the greats.. c’mon you know them!
4. Kill everything in your path. Kill yourself when things get too tough or just for the fun of it, Kill others, their dreams, their children, off course one way to do this is to never never help anyone after all they are just lazy and stupid. Didn’t someone say god helps those who help themselves. Use people and dump them, they are so stupid so what if they ran berserk.. sit back, laugh and enjoy the mess you created. If they used their potential, they could be like you and join your exclusive club. Weakness should be discarded, you encourage selective breeding and disposal of non perfection. Oh c’mon, most people are a burden even your close friends. Always smile at them but GET THEM before they get you. Even JESUS had Judas. Be a backstabber, get others to do your dirty work for you, if they get too nosy, kill them. While your at it, poach, kill animals as you will, destroy the environment. Its all going to the dogs anyway. Don’t forget to build a fortress of some kind for yourself and cronies. When caught or questioned, deny, bribe and use every means to get out of that mess..you are god.
5. Make every day and hour yours. Make the rules. Get this: Do what you want, when and how you want. Never rest, get some substance to calm you. Of course no time off your staff. A 24 hour shift for the lazy, poor and stupid lot. They need you, they won’t quit. Don’t pay their wages, or pay them piecemeal and never allow them to see their families. You will get lucky and they will croak on the job. Man, don’t you just love blood and death. Who needs vegetation, blue skies ,clean air, wildlife, clean water and all that environmental nonsense. Make hay while the sun shines, privatize these and then sell it to the poor stupid people. If you don’t, someone else will, so it might as well be you laughing all the way to the bank you own. Oh yea, promote chemical dependencies among the populace so that you can control them. Sports, please! get a drug, results without sweat. They’ll be too busy searching for the next fix to compete with you. Work, work, work without rest especially for your damned employees: All work and no play translates into more work hours, reliability and off course more money for you, oh god!
6. Be a narcissitic and self centered person. Focus on yourself. You ,you and you why anyone else. Revel in the glory and accolades others give to you. Better still, spin it in your favour, publicize it and control the media. You only live once, there is no rehearsal, these are your motivational statements.
Did you say family, ok you mean your folks, already dealt with that, your spouse , they married you for their benefit so they gotta live with it. If they attempt to leave or correct you make their lives hell and reduce them to shivering heaps dependent on the drugs you create. For this to work, never let them see your true colors only your wealth and splendor. And anyway you can always dispose of them in many ways after all you are god.IN public your spouse must be drugged to give the image of a perfect companion. Primed and propped. In private, bully them into submission into worshipping you unconditionally. For children do the test tubes and experiments and if not happy you know what to do, abort and try again. What is life? these pro choicers…you’ll give them something to choose! You’re god.
7. Acquire everything you can by all means necessary and possible and while at it, keep your eyes open and admire other peoples stuff and acquire acquire acquire. Doesn’t have to be money or gold, it could be their cat ,their kidney, skin, house, wife, husband, business you name it. They will soon learn to cooperate unlike that fool Naboth. Take it. Who or what will stop you. To succeed here you need to be in charge or have those in charge in your pocket. Don’t worry, you own armies and security groups and you walk around heavily protected either by charms or men.
By now, you are really good at this. No one likes people without anything. As the Africans say: bare hands will not be licked. Your hands are full of treasures, doesn’t matter where you got them, point is they are full. Next ,in case of a case you know what to do. Kill, lie, bribe, buy off, counterfeit and continue with life, build bigger and better storehouses to store your accumulations.
8.Have intimate relations both physical, emotional, sexual with anyone and anything at anytime. After all these feelings exist and we must experience them in all their tastes. In fact, throw off all your clothes, walk around naked to demonstrate your outer and inner depravity,oops I mean openness and freedom.
Engage in orgies both under the influence and within sobriety. Invent new ways of intimacy. Practice polygamy in monogamy, monogamy in polygamy.. it’s all one fun game. Diseases ,mmmh!the medications are available for you since you are rich and gives an opportunity to research on those who can’t afford treatment.
9. in a nutshell, do what you want or like, to hell with the rest.
There you go, you reprobate mind. The MOST HIGH has handed you over to depravity.
