SILENT SOLITUDE
Peace and quiet. How many times have you wished for that? How many times have you tried to get it but were unsuccessful? Maybe you share Job's sentiment. Job 3:26, "I have no peace, no quietness; I have no rest, but only turmoil.” We can understand why Job would say this. We may not have it as bad as Job did, but we might still be able to relate to this verse. To say this past year has been stressful is an understatement. As we begin our new year, maybe it's time to start incorporating some silent solitude into our daily regimen.
1) No thanks.
It might seem strange but there are some reasons I might resist having quiet time. We're addicted to noise. Silence is uncomfortable; it feels unnatural to us. If you live in an urban area where it's normal to hear horns honking and sirens blaring, the times when that's not happening and you have quiet surroundings it doesn't feel right.
If your house is normally full of people and pets you know it's rarely quiet. And when it is it's so foreign to you it's uncomfortable. We might not like all the noise we hear but we have to admit that for many of us, it's just weird to have complete silence.
Too busy. We've got too much going on to just take some time out to sit still. I get my prayer time in while I'm on the move. You know, quick prayer here and there. I'm sure God understands. Plus, my mind is too busy. I can’t focus on being still before the Lord when my mind is distracted by all the things I've got going on. I can’t get into quiet mode when my mind or my feet are racing.
To avoid thinking. Sometimes there are things we should be thinking about but we don't want to. It might be too difficult or scary or emotional. So, we avoid going there. We drown out our thoughts through things like the TV, radio, a movie or something else. Have you ever been watching TV at night and you start dozing off? So, you turn it off and get ready for bed.
You're yawning away as you turn out the light, and as soon as your head hits the pillow your mind is off to the races. You start having strange thoughts and you're like, where is this coming from? A few minutes ago I was falling asleep, now I can't shut my brain off.
We sort of turned our brain off when we were watching TV. But now that the preoccupation of the noise has disappeared, all we have now are our thoughts. We don't want that; we're trying to go to sleep. But that's what can happen with silence; our brain kicks into high gear and sometimes the thoughts that pop into our minds are things we don't want to think about.
We have too much of it already. Some people would actually want to have less quietness in their lives. Solitude is not something they look for, it's something they hide from. Maybe as a child you were sent to your room a lot and you had nothing but silence to keep you company.
Maybe you live alone and much of your time is spent in solitude. For you, solitude is confinement; it's restricting. So whenever possible, you seek to be around people and noise as often as you can because you know when you go back home there will be solitude and silence.
And with COVID, we've all had to be inside more. We haven't been able to go to all the places we normally would be so we're spending a lot of time at home. These are some of the reasons why we might be saying, 'no thanks' to some silent solitude.
2) Interrupted solitude.
I'm not avoiding it, I just can't get it. I try to get away by myself but I constantly get interrupted. Jesus dealt with this too.
Mark 1:35-39, "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed. Simon and his companions went to look for him, and when they found him, they exclaimed: “Everyone is looking for you!” Jesus replied, “Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also. That is why I have come.” So he traveled throughout Galilee, preaching in their synagogues and driving out demons."
This takes place early in Jesus' ministry. He had spent the day teaching and driving out evil spirits and healing people. So he gets up early and goes out to be by himself. It's understandable why Jesus would need to do this. During his ministry, he would undoubtedly be busy from sunup to sundown. Whether he was traveling or doing all the things I just mentioned, he would not have the opportunity to get away by himself to relax.
Maybe that's your world. From the time you get up it's go-time. You have work to do and a family to take care of. Perhaps there aren't enough hours in the day for you to do all you would like to get done. So you would say, "Quiet time? Get away by myself? How do you expect me to fit that in?" If Jesus can fit it in then we can too.
Jesus got up early but that didn't mean he wasn't tempted to stay in bed; I know I would've been. But if that was the only time I could get my quiet time in I hope I would be willing to make that sacrifice. We know how we get when we don't have an opportunity to unwind. We get irritable, we get tense and stressed. And not all of this is due to being busy; it's also due to not taking time to be with the Lord. If Jesus needed to get away and pray then there's no way we can avoid it without suffering for it.
Notice what happens when Jesus does get away-the disciples go looking for him. And they found him. Have you ever felt like in order to get away for a little while you find that perfect hiding place? So you go stuff yourself in the closet. Then within minutes you hear it-"Mom? Where are you?" Or it's your husband, "Honey, where are my boxers with the smiley faces on them?" It's like they can't survive without you for five minutes.
Jesus knows how you feel. "Everyone's looking for you", they said. And notice we don't see Jesus going off on them. He doesn't respond with, "can't I have any time to myself! Is that too much to ask?" He may have been tempted to but he didn't.
Why did he tell his disciples it was time to go somewhere else? That may have been one of the things he was praying about. Being alone with God helps us to figure things out. Jesus didn't do things according to his plans and timing, but the Father's. Jesus had a lot of ground to cover; many places to go where others needed him. So it wasn't that he didn't care about the people who were looking for him, it was just time to move on. He would make it back at some point but for now it was time to go.
There was another time Jesus was interrupted in his quiet time. Jesus had sent out the Apostles two by two. It would be the first time they would have gone out on their own. They saw that Jesus really had given them the power to preach and heal and drive out demons. Then they came back and gave their exciting report to Jesus.
Mark 6:30-34, "The apostles gathered around Jesus and reported to him all they had done and taught. Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.” So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place.
But many who saw them leaving recognized them and ran on foot from all the towns and got there ahead of them. When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. So he began teaching them many things."
The Apostles were no doubt exhausted and hungry. So Jesus saying, 'let's go off and be by ourselves and get some rest', was music to their ears. Then the boat reaches the shore and they see the crowd waiting anxiously for Jesus. Can you picture the irritation of the Apostles? If it were me I'm sure I would've been irritated. I can picture Peter going up to Jesus and whispering, "Tell them to go away. Tell them we have to get some rest. C'mon, they'll understand. You can see them afterwards."
But Jesus ministers to them. He saw how desperate they were to be taught and led correctly. They weren't getting it from the religious leaders. His compassion toward them overrode his desire to be alone with his disciples. Sometimes, we won't be able to reject the interruption. We need to be a little flexible and have the compassion of Jesus.
Sometimes the interruption will be about something that can wait; but sometimes it won't be. We may still be irritated but hopefully we'll be understanding and realize as much as we try to have a set time to have quiet time, life happens and we'll need to deal with it and try again.
And for Jesus it wasn't long after before he was able to have that quiet time. When the boat landed, he ministered to the people and then it was getting late and they needed to get dinner. This is when Jesus fed the five-thousand plus. And remember the disciples who hadn't had a chance to eat when they returned to give Jesus the report from them being sent out? They would get their dinner too when they picked up the twelve baskets of leftovers.
Then, right after this, Jesus sends his disciples ahead of him while he gets some R&R and prayer time. Mark 6:45-46, "Immediately Jesus made his disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to Bethsaida, while he dismissed the crowd. After leaving them, he went up on a mountainside to pray."
Jesus did make the time to get away. I'm sure his disciples thought he was going to come with them but he stayed back. He needed to pray. We see in chapter one and here his purpose was prayer. Silence and solitude are needed to rejuvenate but Jesus' main purpose was to be in touch with the Father without being interrupted.
It's important to not be interrupted when we're praying. I know there may be times when something really can't wait and we'll have to deal with the interruption but for the most part, we need to do our best to ensure we won't be interrupted during our prayer time.
I remember on Sundays before service John would turn off the light and lock the door to his office. Not only would people think he wasn't there, but darkness is good for concentration. Getting by ourselves to pray, meditate and get our thoughts straight are all necessary so we can get back out there and do what we need to do. So we do our best to avoid interruptions.
3) I tried silent solitude but it didn't work.
I tried to do that but it didn't work. I gave it five minutes, I got antsy and gave up. When we're not used to it we can't expect to be able to sit in silent solitude for 30 minutes without it feeling uncomfortable. If five minutes is all you can manage at first then ok, but don't give up. The more you do it the longer you'll be able to do it.
Whenever I try to be quiet and focus on prayer and listen for God to speak, Satan is right there to interrupt and disrupt. I've had that happen to me. As soon as your mind is on God, Satan wants to redirect you to focus on something else, anything else, just so long as you're not focusing on God. Satan wants us to give up and stop seeking solitude and silence.
He wants to keep us away from all the good things silent solitude gives us. He doesn't want us to be alone with God; he doesn't want us to hear God. He doesn't want us to be refreshed and replenished. He wants to keep us busy doing other things and he wants us to continue to be uncomfortable with silent solitude.
So what's going to help us to get into the rhythm so we can benefit from silent solitude? First, try to set a regular time that you believe will work best for you. And if that time happens to be early in the morning, like it was for Jesus, then so be it. But choose whatever time where you are least likely to be interrupted.
And whenever that is, make sure you don't do anything before hand to sabotage it. Don't ingest things like caffeine soon before. You'll be too jittery and unable to focus.
Make sure you're not tired. How many times have you sat down to read your bible or pray and you end up nodding off? That could be because you're too tired to begin with. The noise around you and the things you were doing kept you going but now that you've slowed down your tiredness catches up to you. We need to find the happy medium between not being too tired and not being too hyped up.
Perhaps in your quiet time God speaks to you through his Spirit or his word. You may want to write those things down. That's great, but use pen and paper-avoid bringing your computer, tablet or phone with you into your quiet room. You need a break from the electronics. Plus, you don't need the distractions of notification pings or the temptation to check emails, texts or social media. We're used to using the bible app on our phones but when it's your quiet time, bring an old-fashioned bible in with you.
Earlier I talked about those who avoid silent solitude because they either had too much of it in the past or they have too much of it now. So to say it's a good thing is something they would disagree with. So how does this get turned around for them to see it in a positive light again?
See the difference. Before, if you were sent to your room or put in solitary confinement-silence and solitude were punishment. If you live alone, silence and solitude cause loneliness and depression. But now, silence and solitude have a different meaning and purpose.
Now, it has nothing to do with punishment; it has to do with blessing. Now, instead of it being filled with loneliness and despair, your time is spent with Jesus. Before it was something you would be afraid of and dread, but now it is something you can actually look forward to.
4) How does silence and solitude benefit us?
One of the things that will help us do better at making the time for silent solitude is to understand the benefits and to realize we're being deprived when we don't have it. Consider Solomon's words in Prov. 17:1, "Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting, with strife."
Solomon is talking about peace within the household but this holds true for each individual. We're taught here that material blessings are not worth sacrificing the precious gems of peace and quiet. Here we see the value of peace and quiet. Given the choice between dry crust and a feast, of course we're going to choose the feast. But throw in the condition that with dry crust comes peace and quiet but with the feast comes strife and that's a game-changer.
We need to place that high of a value on our peace and quiet. If we don't strive for it for ourselves, how can we expect our house to be filled with it? And if we don't take that time to seek silent solitude, we will have strife instead. Strife within and strife without.
Another benefit is that it allows us to think. Whenever things are chaotic what do we often say? "I can't even hear myself think". It's a funny saying but we understand it. It means there's too much noise to think clearly. We need silent solitude so we can concentrate, focus and think clearly.
It works for our ears too. Silent solitude will help us hear the voice of God more clearly. Our time with God isn't just about reading his word and praying; it's about listening. What is he saying to us as we study his word? How is he responding to our prayers? If we're able to listen we can hear him give insight and direction. We'll hear his knowledge and wisdom. We'll get answers or confirmation; perhaps even a revelation.
When we think we hear an obscure noise what do we say? 'Stop. Listen'. Or, 'turn that down I think I hear something'. We need the distractions cleared away before we can hear what we need to.
Before refrigerators people used icehouses to preserve their food. Icehouses had thick walls, no windows, and a tightly fitted door. In winter when streams and lakes were frozen, large blocks of ice were cut, hauled to the icehouse and covered with sawdust. Often the ice would last well into the summer.
One time a man lost a valuable watch while working in an icehouse. He searched diligently for it, carefully raking through the sawdust, but didn’t find it. His fellow workers also looked but their efforts proved futile. A small boy who heard about the fruitless search slipped into the icehouse during the noon hour and soon emerged with the watch.
Amazed, the men asked him how he found it. "I closed the door," the boy replied, "and then I laid down in the sawdust and kept very still. Soon I heard the watch ticking." When we’re silent before God, we will hear his voice. Let’s make sure we’re making the sacrifice of setting aside the time to get alone with God in silent solitude. It will improve our quality of life.
