Introduction
Tonight, we begin a new series called “You Ought to See a Whole Lot of One-Anothering going on in the Church House”. Let me tell you how this series came about. As I have been reading through the book of Acts preparing my Monday Night Live Studies, I noticed a common phrase “one-another” would pop up. Twelve times that phrase shows up in the Book. It aroused my curiosity, so I did a search of the phrase “one-another” and discovered that it appears 269 times in 115 verses throughout the New Testament. And to my way of thinking, if the phrase “one-another” appears that many times in the Bible, there must be something about it God wants us to know about “one-anothering” in the church house.
So, over the next several weeks, we’re going to look a few of those “one another” and see what is required of us. The first two “one anothers” I call the foundational ones because without these two, you cannot accomplish the other “one anothers”.
Tonight, we are going to tackle forgiveness. So, if you have your Bibles turn with me to Colossians 3:12-13.
Scripture
Colossians 3:12–13 (NKJV)
12 Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.
Points
#1
IF WE HAVE TO FORGIVE ONE ANOTHER, IT MEANS THAT WE EVEN CAN BE HURT IN THE CHURCH HOUSE.
Paul is talking to the church because he says we have been called into one body in vs 15 and as part of this body we have to forgive one another. So, hurts can happen in the church house.
And, I dare say, we all have a personal story of being hurt or know of someone who has been hurt in the church that they had been attending. It is nothing new. In the Book of Acts, deacons came into existence because the Hellenistic Jews thought they were being slighted in the daily distribution of food. They felt that they were being hurt in the church house.
In Philippians 4:3 Paul says that I plead with Euodia and Syntyche to be of the same mind. Obviously, these two women were quarreling in the church. And we know how a quarrel works: somebody quarrels with someone else and people take sides. And before you know it you have a divided church.
In Acts 15 the Bible tells us that there was a sharp disagreement between Paul and Barnabas over taking John Mark with them as they revisited the cities that they previously ministered in. The disagreement was so bad that Paul and Barnabas went separate ways. Paul took Silas with him and they went to Syria; Barnabas took John Mark and went to Cyprus.
There were problems in the early church and there are problems in the church now.
At this point in time according to Thom Rainer a contributor to the Christian Post in an article dated September 1, 2020, pastors are leaving churches at record numbers. And he gave as his second reason is that Pastors are tired of the internal conflicts. He went on to say that pastors get daily complaints about how things are going at the church.
What is interesting is that in 2019, only 4% of the people who switched Churches in 2019 did so because of a conflict within the church. That tells me that those in conflict stay in the church in which they are part of the conflict. I think that is absolutely true. I have heard many people say I have a conflict with my pastor, I am going to wait him out. And church members in conflict in the same church usually sit on opposite sides of the church and say nothing to one another.
The reality is every church experiences a measure of conflict in some way or another. Churches are made up of people, and anywhere people are involved in anything, there's the potential for disagreement and conflict. There is no perfect church. And that will continue until the day Christ comes back.
#2
WE ARE NOT ASKED TO FORGIVE ONE ANOTHER; WE ARE COMMANDED TO FORGIVE ONE ANOTHER.
I want us to look closely at the last half of verse 13.
In the New King James Version, it reads: “even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.”
In the King James Version, it says: “even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye”.
In the NIV it states: “Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
Forgiveness is not optional; it is a requirement. This is not the only Scripture that says it is a requirement for Christian especially forgiving those in the church.
Luke 6:37 (NIV)
37 “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Mark 11:25 (NIV)
25 And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
We all love the idea of forgiveness when it comes to our transgressions. However, when someone else has hurt us, getting even sounds better than forgiveness. I think that is because we see our transgressions as small, but we see the transgressions of others directed at us as huge. Jesus made a comment about exactly that way of thinking in His sermon on the mount. Luke 6:41 (NIV)
41 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?
Our first response is not forgiving but rather our first response is getting even. When you seek to get even you are practicing the Law of Lamech. Lamech killed a man for wounding him and then said that he would seek revenge 77 times over against anyone who hurts him. That became known as the Law of Lamech and it is found in Genesis 4:23-24. It's the idea that if anyone inflicts pain on me, I will make them pay. But we are ought to be different, we need to offer them grace.
And the other “one anothers” will not work without this one in place and active in your life.
#3
AS A CHRISTIAN, I AM THE MOST FORGIVEN PERSON IN THE WORLD. THEREFORE, I SHOULD BE THE MOST FORGIVING PERSON IN THE WORLD.
VERSE 13
The New International Version (1984) Rules for Holy Living
Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
I asked myself when Christ died on the Cross, what has He not forgiven me of? And what I did I went through in my mind what I consider my top ten sins and wrote them down on a piece of paper. And then I went over each one and asked myself is that forgiven. And if it was, I scratched through that offense. When I finished this little exercise all I had was ten “scratched threws” on my paper.
And then I thought to myself, if all my offenses were scratched threw by Jesus, then why cannot I scratch threw the offenses others have done to me? And I could not come up with an answer why I should not be able to forgive. What I concluded if I have been shown that level of forgiveness directed at me; I should be able to return that to others.
#4
THE KEY TO AVOID HAVING TO STRUGGLE WITH FORGIVENESS IS DON’T WEAR YOUR FEELINGS ON YOUR SLEEVE.
Right before Paul begins his discussion on forgiving, he advises us in verse 13 to bear with one another. I looked up the word “bear” and it means to put up with one another. Don’t come to church with your feelings on your sleeve. We are about to enter the holiday season and if your family is like most typical families there are one or two family members that rub you wrong. For the sake of peace within your family, you let their comments slide off of you.
That is what needed also in the church house.
