REFLECTIONS
We can have a tendency to focus a lot on our image. Whether it's how we look, how we come across or how we're perceived by others, our image is something we take seriously. And in part, that's a good thing. We should be concerned with how we come across and that people perceive us correctly.
But sometimes the image we present is merely a superficial portrayal. People spend a lot of money altering their appearance; whether it's plastic surgery, cosmetics, clothes or some other way. One of the reasons why is because we don't like our image so we change it to suit the image we most want to convey. Women want to look like super models or Barbie so they go through the process to look more like them. Skinny guys lift weights to try to bulk up and look more masculine. Everyone has something about themselves they don't like.
Sometimes it's something they can alter: I was born with curly hair and I want straight hair so I get a straightening iron. I have brown eyes and I want blue eyes so I get colored contacts. Sometimes it's something that I can't change like an unsightly birth mark or a birth defect or maybe an incurable disease or illness. So I make attempts to try to hide these things; make them less detectable.
In all of this we see how easy it can be to have a poor self-image. The danger in this, aside from being depressed about how you look, is where this negativity could lead. We come to loathe ourselves. We're disgusted when we look in the mirror. We wish we were anyone else.
Maybe we're sick of the stares or tired of seeing those who look more like what we wished we looked like and we're jealous and envious. The irony is the one with pin straight hair envies the one with curly hair and vice versa. We become bitter, angry people who are miserable and unable to enjoy our life.
Unfortunately, what can happen is we become angry with God. We don't like how he made us so we conclude he either made a mistake or he doesn't love us like he loves other, more "gifted" people. When we develop this line of thinking we have a major problem.
In last week's sermon on being a treasure seeker, I said God viewed us as a treasure because he loved us enough to send Jesus, who gave his life to redeem us. Then I asked you to say, "I am God's treasure". Some of you may not have said it. Perhaps you did say it but you didn't really believe it.
Why not? Is it hard for you to believe you're a treasure in God's eyes? Why? Is it because of the way you look? Is it the negative things you were told growing up? Is it because of the poor choices you've made in life? Is it because of the sin you just committed for the millionth time?
If we were asked to describe how we see ourselves, would we have answers like, "ugly, fat, stupid, bad, worthless"? Would our self-analysis be accurate? How far off is our self image? How can we begin to see ourselves in the light that God sees us in?
1) Mirror, mirror on the wall.
We know this phrase from the 1937 classic, Snow White. The beautiful but wicked Queen stands before her talking mirror to inquire, “Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?” Each time, the mirror would respond, “Thou, O Queen, art the fairest in the land.”
But over the years, Snow White grew into womanhood and her beauty transcended every other woman in the kingdom. Came the day when the mirror said to the Queen, “Snow White, O Queen, is the fairest of them all.” From that time on Snow White was the object of the Queen’s hatred. The queen was more focused on her physical image than her spiritual image.
We might not have a magic mirror that talks to us but chances are when we look in the mirror we begin talking to ourselves about what we see. The defects and flaws jump out at us. They say the mirror doesn't lie. That might be true but if we have a poor self image, when we look in the mirror we might see something that isn't there. [pic of anorexic girl seeing a fat girl].
The true image vs. the perceived image; it's a scary thing. The reality is this girl is very thin but her perception is the opposite. So what she'll do in response to this will be to lose more weight; putting her in a more precarious situation. We might not look at ourselves quite as drastically as this but we can still see ourselves in the wrong light. We see all our imperfections and ignore all the positive qualities. Say we have pretty eyes but a big nose. Which one will we focus on more?
Can we turn our image around and see something more positive and encouraging? Sure, it's a matter of changing our perspective. As a Christian, that becomes easier when we're focused on our spiritual image. This is where it goes from looking at our reflection to being a reflection.
2nd Cor. 3:18, "And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."
In vs. 16 Paul said when we turn to the Lord the veil is taken away. The veil represented a lack of understanding as well as an inability to reflect the Lord's glory. So, when we become born again we have the Spirit of Christ living in us. That means we're able to see the difference between the darkness and the light and we have the ability to live in accordance with the light.
We can understand the heart and mind of God and we learn that his will for us is to be conformed to the image of Jesus as Rom. 8:29 tells us. So now, as an image bearer of Jesus, we go through life with the focus of changing our image to match the image of Jesus. We remove spiritual impurities and develop the character of Christ.
Not only that, Rom. 12:2 says to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. So, a big part of our transformation process into the image of Jesus is done in the heart and mind. When the way we think and feel starts to change, our character starts to change, our light shines brighter and we reflect the Lord's glory more and more. When people see us we want them to see the image of Jesus.
But what about when we look at ourselves? Do we see ourselves as God sees us? Do we see who we are in the Spirit more than who we are in the flesh? [pic of cat seeing a lion]. I might physically be a house cat but spiritually I'm a lion because I have the Spirit of the Lion of Judah living in me-enabling me to have the heart of a lion.
What I see when I look in the mirror should be less about what I look like physically and more about what I look like spiritually. It's all in how I see myself. We may still look the same with all the same imperfections, but we decide to let the eyes of God and the Spirit of Christ determine our self-image and respond accordingly.
"Choir director Arianne Abela spent her childhood sitting on her hands. Born with fingers missing or fused together she wanted to hide them from the world. She was also missing her left leg as well as some toes on her right foot. Although she was a music lover and lyric soprano, she planned to major in government at Smith College.
But one day her choir teacher asked her to conduct the choir. Obviously doing that would make her hands quite visible. But she did it. From that moment she found her career going on to conduct church choirs and serving as director of choirs at another university. "My teachers saw something in me", Arianne explains. Because they did, they moved her in a direction that would exploit her talents, even if that meant it would also exploit her imperfections. Because Arianne was willing to step out of her comfort zone, she was able to discover her new passion.
God sees something in us too. Sure, he sees all our imperfections but he focuses on what he has gifted us to do despite them. And he will move us in the direction of using those gifts, even if that means it will expose an imperfection we have. Why? So we will find our true worth and focus on what matters most.
I'm sure the more Arianne conducted she was able to focus more on the joy she got from it than the visibility of her marred hands. God wants us to have that shift in focus also and for the same reasons. He wants us to focus on reflecting his image instead of reflecting on all our faults and flaws.
I'm sure people in the audience focused more on Arianne's ability to conduct an orchestra than they did her hands. They probably noticed them but their focus wasn't on her hands, but her talent. People may notice our imperfections but when we reflect the Lord's glory, that will shine brighter than our imperfections. Our spiritual reflection.
2) Not despised...prized.
David and Jonathan were close friends. After Jonathan and Saul were killed in battle, David became king and began to pile up victories in battle. At some point, David wanted to honor his friendship with Jonathan and asked if there was anyone left in the family to whom he could show kindness. There was- Jonathan's son Mephibosheth. So, David said, alright, go get him and bring him here.
2nd Sam. 9:6-13, "When Mephibosheth son of Jonathan, the son of Saul, came to David, he bowed down to pay him honor. David said, “Mephibosheth!” “Your servant,” he replied. “Don’t be afraid,” David said to him, “for I will surely show you kindness for the sake of your father Jonathan. I will restore to you all the land that belonged to your grandfather Saul, and you will always eat at my table.”
Mephibosheth bowed down and said, “What is your servant, that you should notice a dead dog like me?” Then the king summoned Ziba, Saul’s servant, and said to him, “I have given your master’s grandson everything that belonged to Saul and his family. You and your sons and your servants are to farm the land for him and bring in the crops, so that your master’s grandson may be provided for. And Mephibosheth, grandson of your master, will always eat at my table.” (Now Ziba had fifteen sons and twenty servants.)
Then Ziba said to the king, “Your servant will do whatever my lord the king commands his servant to do.” So Mephibosheth ate at David’s table like one of the king’s sons. Mephibosheth had a young son named Mica, and all the members of Ziba’s household were servants of Mephibosheth. And Mephibosheth lived in Jerusalem, because he always ate at the king’s table, and he was crippled in both feet."
Mephibosheth referred to himself as a dead dog. That phrase means a despised person. Why would he feel despised? Because of his condition. We learn about what happened to Mephibosheth in chapter 4. 2nd Sam. 4:4, "(Jonathan son of Saul had a son who was lame in both feet. He was five years old when the news about Saul and Jonathan came from Jezreel. His nurse picked him up and fled, but as she hurried to leave, he fell and became crippled. His name was Mephibosheth.)"
So we have a terribly unfortunate accident that changed his life forever. He came to see himself as despised, probably because that's how he was made to feel. He couldn't do what "normal" people could which probably made him feel less of a person. But we see he was married with a son so that's nice. But even with a family that loves you, we can still feel less than or despised when we have a condition that makes us different than everyone else.
I have a skin condition that is under control now but there was a time when it was pretty bad. I was embarrassed, always conscientious of what people were thinking when they saw me. There was no medicine that was going to make Mephibosheth's condition any better.
Then we have what David did. With the exclamation point at the end of his greeting it shows his excitement when he saw him. I'm sure David noticed his feet; especially as he made his way in. Did he focus on that? No. Did that change his focus on being kind? No. In fact, it may have actually played a role in David's generosity.
Perhaps he was merely going to bless him with the land but after seeing him he decided to have Ziba and the other servants farm the land and provide for him. David wanted him to live a better life so he invited him into the palace to be treated like one of his sons and eat at his table.
It's interesting that the passage ends with reiterating his condition, 'and he was lame in both feet'. The author wanted people to know that this act of kindness and blessedness was given to a lame person; one who was "despised". What a lovely picture. In retrospect, we're Mephibosheth and God is David. We were crippled spiritually and then we were invited to eat at the king's table as one of his children.
I wonder how often Mephibosheth focused on his feet after this? I'm sure it was a lot less than he did before. How much should we focus on our "lameness" now that we 'eat at the king's table'? Mephibosheth may have been despised; he certainly felt despised, but he encountered the kindness and generosity of David and came to be despised no more. We who have encountered the kindness and generosity of God can realize that we are no longer despised. We are loved, blessed and forgiven.
One meaning for prized is valued. A synonym for valued is treasured. This gets back to what I was saying last week. God knows our true value; he knows our true worth. Unfortunately, we easily de-value ourselves. We consider ourselves to be worthless. We might be unworthy-we don't deserve what Jesus did for us-but that doesn't make us worthless; quite the opposite. We're valuable to God; treasured by him.
David didn't despise Mephibosheth, he prized him. But that didn't necessarily change other people's view of Mephibosheth. I'm sure he was still despised by certain people. But I'm sure he didn't let it get to him. Why? Because the king had shown him how special he was. That should work for us too. People might stare at us or focus on our defects and flaws instead of seeing the beauty inside of us. And that can discourage us. But what will help is knowing we have a God who loves us and values us.
John 9:1-3, "As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life."
It was a popular misconception that one could actually sin in the womb and suffer by having a birth defect. It was also a misconception that all human suffering was the result of either a parent’s sin or the person’s. No room was left for another possibility. So Jesus sought to clear up that misconception.
We can feel that way today. If I have an affliction it's because God doesn't love me; he has forsaken me. But Jesus counters that. This blindness wasn't because of sin-this was an opportunity for the work of God to be displayed in his life. Then, Jesus healed this man of his blindness.
Think about all the "undesirables" Jesus focused on-lepers, cripples, prostitutes, the demon possessed. Jesus focused on people the rest of society despised. One reason he did this was to show how much these people were treasured in God's eyes. Jesus would want us to remove our blindness so we could see that we are loved and that God wants to do his work in us. In fact, there is work that can only be accomplished through those who are handicapped.
Nick Vujicic (Voochic) was born without arms or legs. When he was born his mother wouldn't hold him. Eventually, his parents accepted his condition and understood it as "God's plan for their son". Nick became a Christian and went on to earn a bachelor's degree. He's a motivational speaker who has written numerous books and even acted in a short film.
Obviously there are motivational speakers who have all their limbs. But how much of a difference does it make to see one with no limbs talk about his joy in Christ? The impact he has made because of his condition has been immeasurably greater than the one he would've made without it. One could easily feel bad for Nick and be sad over how deprived he is.
Here are some quotes from Nick's book, Life Without Limits and you tell me if you think he feels deprived. “It's a lie to think you're not good enough. It's a lie to think you're not worth anything.” “I have the choice to be angry at God for what I don't have or be thankful for what I do have.” “For every disability you have, you are blessed with more than enough abilities to overcome your challenges.” “Life without limbs? Or life without limits?”
We're not despised by God-we're prized by God. So, what are you going to reflect on today?
