Series: Leaning Into the Peace of God
Sermon: Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
Today begins a sermon series on how leaning into God's peace can renew our purpose during the exhaustion of this pandemic. There is a temptation – and I fall prey to it as well – to only utilize this time for hibernation. I believe that when we lean into God’s peace as a daily discipline, we can become a non-anxious presence in a country and a community that is living in constant fear.
Each Sunday in September, the Gospel readings present us with opportunities to lean into God’s peace in various ways.
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Ahh… relationships. They are… messy. They require feelings. Have you heard of those? They are either feast or famine! There are three popular approaches to feelings:
Hyper feelings: Like fireworks on the 4th of July, a short fuse and a big explosion.
Mixed feelings: One person described it as, “Watching an entire greyhound with politicians go over a cliff… with five empty seats.”
Repressed feelings: “I like my emotions like I like my water! Bottled uptight.”
Jesus knew that we, his followers, could lean into God's peace if our relationships were healthy.
That is a great idea, but, like many great ideas, it comes with a problem. No one has invented a way to make relationships work without conflict!
Have you ever heard of the province of Modena in northern Italy? It sits between two provinces that are culinary giants. The first is Parma, which is to thank for offering the world the gift of parmesan cheese. The other, to the south, is Bologna, which is to blame for the smell of fried Bologna.
Modena has an interesting story that occurred in 1325 when some soldiers from Modena invaded the city of Bologna. The destroyed buildings, they stole artifacts, and the poets said they even insulted the… facial composition… of a nobleman’s daughters. But that was not their worst crime, by far. No, they stole an oak bucket from a public well on their way out of town.
To the people of Bologna, the oak bucket was… an oak bucket, but it was their oak bucket. So they declared an act of war, and the conflict lasted 12 years.
After the war was over, the citizens of Modena decided that there was only one thing to do with the Bologna bucket… Return it as an act of solidarity? Prove that they could forgive and move forward? God forbid! No, they put it in the bell tower of the town church.
(See Picture) Where it still hangs…
So when we find ourselves getting angry and upset, we need to ask ourselves… "Is this a bucket?"
Today’s Gospel is not a rubric for excommunicating people. It’s a lesson in restoration, and it’s a lesson in the peace of God.
The first thing we need to remember about relationships is, Jesus admits that disagreements will happen!
When he says, “If a member of the church sins against you…” He admits something that people try to deny, and that is the church has people capable of sinning against us… hurting us, and fracturing our relationships. Some people use this as an excuse not to come to church. They think the church should be perfect people. Thankfully Jesus doesn’t see things that way. He says right here that the expectation is that when – not if – we hurt one another, we seek to make it right.
When there is a clash between us—the corporate us—we can show people what's really inside.
The second thing about relationships is… Jesus shows us that conflict brings opportunities for healing.
One of the best tests of our spirituality is the willingness—I did not say ability because nearly everyone has the ability—to see how we hurt people, then seek to understand why.
Going to a person and sitting down with them can be terrifying. So, instead of conquering that fear, what happens? We suppress it… we like our feelings like our water, bottled!
It always comes out… and it usually happens in front of another person. "Did you hear about the Bishop’s diocesan youth initiative? He’s raised 800k and spent 700k toward discipleship ministries.” "Eh… I'm not a fan; he's been sooo stingy with Beckwith, he wouldn’t even repair the dock.”………. Someone’s holding a bucket!
Holding buckets amounts to surrendering potentialities.
Jesus said, “If you do go to them, and you do work it out, then you have won a friend.” I’ve watched that occur first hand!
When people who handle disagreements, hurts, and disappointments with a holy curiosity that focuses on what God can do with the issue wind up making good friends great friends! Often the proper handling of conflict will deepen a friendship.
Here's the key to the sermon: There's one word that shows up four times in two verses: “listen.” Here’s a fascinating tidbit… when we put the word “listen” under the microscope of Greek is means… listen.
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We will not find healing and restoration, nor peace of soul until we are willing to listen. This especially speaks to the rampant yet largely unconscious action of white saviorism.
Some of us are so used to talking and not listening that we want to be the ones talking for the oppressed instead of using our positions, privileges, and influence to create a platform for the oppressed and handing them the microphone.
Let me say it this way… we often recognize the face of racism, but we rarely notice its shadow.
Often someone points out a sin, and it's TEC to the rescue… "Don't worry; we've got this… we will be your savior." We stand up in a room filled with people, grab a microphone, stand on the table, and rail on the room about how this person is hurting, and it is their fault!
I wonder what kind of peace we could have among ourselves and in our nation if we said, “Ladies and gentlemen, could I have your attention for a moment? This is my friend… and he’s got a story to tell you, will you please honor him with your attention?”
Peace—inner and outer—comes from listening!
I heard a story about a father who saw his son hurting, so he asked him what was wrong. The son told him how one of his friends hurt him, called him names, insulted him, and told him he never wanted to see him again. The father listened.
A few days later, the father saw his son texting someone, so he asked which friend and how they were doing… The son said he was talking to his friend. The father said, "I thought you two were no longer friends."
The son said, "Oh, I forgave him; we're friends again."
Then father sat down at his desk, he realized that his son knew more about the forgiveness of sins than he did, and he finished his sermon with that story.
Amen.
