On an Internet discussion board I found the following comments:
Designer duds, hair gel, waxing appointments, manicures, and facials -- once upon a time, these terms were only associated with women, but nowadays, it seems, men are spending more time and money on looking good. Do the men you know go to the barber or the salon? Are they worried about their waistline for reasons that have little to do with health? Tell us what you think.
Ok, this one got me out of my chair after a long day's work. My stomach did not appreciate me reading this article. It is still churning. I say let men be men. Let us have hair on our backs and get cheap haircuts. If there is a culture of men that think that it is "Chic" to have a pamper day for their bodies, let them. But a message to all of you, this is not normal behavior! nrmlman Tue 12/16/03, 9:16:53
I also found in a search on the topic of men that there are those who are frustrated that women these days do not let the men make the first move. Someone wrote:
I don't think guys find it intimidating, per sé, but I don't think it's a good idea regardless. Men are called to lead in relationships, and it's probably not a very good idea to try to initiate one by having the female lead, because if you do that, then you're not setting a very good precedent. In other words, if a guy can't lead from the get go, what makes you think that he's going to step up and take the initiative later, because he probably won't.
This confusion concerning the male role has had an impact on the marriage relationship. Tony Evans says men have been “sissified” and their wives can no longer look up to them and respect them.
On the lighter side, one sister wants all her male friends to know that it is great to be a man! Here is what she gives are the reasons why it great to be a man:
* One mood… ALL the time.
* Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
* You know stuff about tanks.
* Your last name stays put.
* Wedding plans take care of themselves.
* You never have to drive to another gas station because this one’s just “icky.”
* You can open all your own jars.
* Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
* Everything on your face stays its original color.
* Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
* If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
* The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
* You don’t have to shave below your neck.
* Your belly usually hides your big hips.
* You can “do” your nails with a pocketknife.
* Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives on December 24th.
* A woman will wreck her car trying to miss a cat running across the street.
* A man will wreck his car trying to hit a cat running across the street.
Now with the tides turning and women gaining more and more rights, some men have felt their manhood being threatened. In view of this, Burger King has been running a commercial called Manthem, set to the turn of Helen Reddy’s “I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar”:
I am man, hear me roar,
In numbers too big to ignore,
And I'm way too hungry to settle for chick food!
'Cause my stomach's starting to growl,
And I'm going on the prowl,
For a Texas Double Whopper!
"Man that's good!"
Oh, yes, I'm a guy!
I'll admit I've been fed quiche!
Wave tofu bye-bye!
Now it's for Whopper beef I reach.
will eat this meat
(Eat this meat)
'Till my innie turns into an outie!
I am starved!
I am incorrigible!
And I'm scarfing a burger beef bacon jalapeno good thing down!
Yeah!
I am hungry!
(I am hungry)
I am incorrigible!
I AM MAN!
Don’t make the mistake of thinking that by pushing away the quiche and tofu for a Texas Double Whopper—you are a man. Being a man is more than scarfing down a burger beef bacon jalapeno.
At the end of his letter to the church at Corinth, the apostle Paul gives a charge to men in the church. He is in essence saying, “If you want to be a man,” “Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.” (1 Corinthians 16:13).
In those four simple statements, he calls Christian men to a foundational quality of masculine godliness.
Be on the alert.
This has also been translated, “Watch (NKJV),” and “Be on your guard (NIV).” Paul was giving the Corinthian men this command in light of what their church was up against living in the Corinthian society.
The Corinthian society was not that much different from our own: “If it feels good, do it”—there was no limit to their sexual expression. Corinth was a port city known for its loose living. The main religion in Corinth actually had sexual immorality as a part of its worship. The temple of Aphrodite had some 1000 temple prostitutes! Sex was the goddess of Corinthian society. It saturated the government, commerce, recreation, and religion of Corinth.
In 1 Corinthians 6:9 Paul says that many of the Corinthian Christians were once wholly involved in the Corinthian lifestyle. They were once fornicators, homosexuals and sodomites. Some were either female or male prostitutes. But as Paul says in v.11 “of such were some of you; you have been washed, sanctified, and justified in the name of the Lord Jesus.
The Apostle Paul had taught the Corinthian believers that “all things were lawful…” (vs. 12) Evidently some of the Corinthians had grabbed hold of that phrase and used it to justify gluttony and sexual sin. They justified gluttony by saying in v.13, “Foods for the stomach and the stomach for foods. Therefore, eat, drink and be merry! That’s what the stomach is for!”
They also rationalized their sexual immorality saying, “Just like it is normal and natural to satisfy our desire for food, sexual desire is normal, so why not fulfill it any way you desire?”
Some years ago a Christian magazine interviewed pornography king Hugh Hefner. Hefner said “sex is [just] a biological activity like eating and drinking.” This was the mindset of the inhabitants of the city of Corinth.
And, in the midst of this kind of society, imagine men desiring to live pure and godly lives for the Lord Jesus Christ. Imagine the temptations they would face, the pressure to look, touch, and experience. It was out of this kind of life that so many had been saved and now these temptations and the pull of the world enticed them to return to their old way of living. So Paul tells these men to “be on the alert.”
The expression, “be on the alert” means to “keep awake,” and to “be on your guard.” It is a military metaphor describing those stationed as sentinels to guard a camp and to observe the movements of the enemy.
The sense of Paul’s command to “be on the alert” is found in the 11 General Orders of a Marine Corp Sentry taught in boot camp. The Marine was to commit these orders to heart. “As a sentry I am to:”
1. Take charge of this post and all government property in view.
2. Walk my post in a military manner, keeping always on the alert and observing everything that takes place within sight or hearing.
3. Report all violations of orders I am instructed to enforce.
4. To repeat all calls [from posts] more distant from the guardhouse than my own.
5. Quit my post only when properly relieved.
6. To receive, obey, and pass on to the sentry who relieves me, all orders from the Commanding Officer, Officer of the Day, Officers, and Non-Commissioned Officers of the guard only.
7. Talk to no one except in the line of duty.
8. Give the alarm in case of fire or disorder.
9. To call the Corporal of the Guard in any case not covered by instructions.
10. Salute all officers and all colors and standards not cased.
11. Be especially watchful at night and during the time for challenging, to challenge all persons on or near my post, and to allow no one to pass without proper authority
As a Christian man you are to exercise the same kind of watchfulness. Paul writes in 2 Tim 2:3-4 “You therefore must endure hardship as a good soldier of Jesus Christ. No one engaged in warfare entangles himself with the affairs of this life, that he may please him who enlisted him as a soldier.”
* You are to be vigilant against the evils of dissension—those who would sneak into the church opposing the clear teachings of Scripture.
* You are to watch against the evils of false doctrines and false teachers.
* You are to watch against the corruption of their own souls and those of their family and church members.
* You are to watch with the same vigilance that is required of a sentinel who guards a camp, lest an enemy should come suddenly upon them, and surprise the camp when the army is sound asleep.
Men, are you alert? Are you alert for yourselves? Are you staying in spiritual shape and preparation? Are you performing the daily drills required of a soldier?
When was the last time you handled your weapon? When was the last time you opened your Bible and read its pages?
If a Marine Corp recruit came to boot camp very physically out of shape, he was sent to PCP (the Physical Conditioning Platoon). He was put on diet trays.
Are you out of shape spiritually? Do you need to go to PCP and be put on diet trays? Have you been eating too much of this world’s delicacies?
Christian men ought to be alert. Are you alert for your family? Have you allowed the enemy to enter your camp? Have you been asleep while he has captivated your children’s minds, infiltrated their hearts and stolen their purity? Has the enemy stolen the heart of your wife? Is she about to eat the forbidden fruit?
Paul says to men: If you want to be a real man, “be on the alert!”
2.) … stand firm in the faith
The expression “the faith” is the body of truths that are taught in the Scripture.
* It is the Gospel, or the Good News of how one can be saved from sin.
* It is the truth of how one is justified or declared righteous and given a right standing with God by grace through faith in Jesus Christ.
* It is the truth concerning the substitutionary atonement that was accomplished when Jesus was “wounded for our transgressions and bruised for our iniquities” and how “the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed." (Isaiah 53:5)
* It is the truth of propitiation that declares that the wrath of a holy God and the righteousness of a just God were satisfied when Christ became our offering for sin. 1 John 2:2 says, “And Jesus Himself is the propitiation for our sins…”
* It is the truth of our redemption. In Galatians 3:13 Paul writes, "Christ has redeemed us from the curse of the law, being made a curse for us." The Christian was once enslaved to sin, a prisoner in the slave market of sin but Christ has set us free! Colossians 1:13--God "has delivered us from the power of darkness, and has translated us into the kingdom of his dear son."
This is the “faith” or the body of truth in which men are to “stand firm.” When Jude wrote, “I found it necessary to write to you exhorting you to contend earnestly for the faith which was once for all delivered to the saints” this is what he was referring to.
But sadly, men aren’t standing firm in hardly anything these days, especially when it comes to “standing firm in the faith.”
* The typical U.S. Congregation draws an adult crowd that’s 61% female, 39% male.
* On any given Sunday there are 13 million more adult women than men in America’s churches.
* On any given Sunday almost 25 percent of married, churchgoing women will worship without their husbands.
* Midweek activities often draw 70 to 80 percent female participants.
* As many as 90 percent of the boys who are being raised in church will abandon it by their 20th birthday. Many of these boys will never return.
* The average man accepts the reality of Jesus Christ, but fails to see any value in going to church.
* A significant number of churchgoing men attend out of habit, unaffected by what they hear.
* Quite a few men go to church simply to keep their wives/mothers/girlfriends happy.
* The majority of men who attend church do nothing during the week to grow their faith.
* Relatively few churches are able to establish or maintain a vibrant men’s ministry.
This gender gap is not just a U.S. phenomenon; churches around the world are short on men. No other major religion suffers such a large, chronic shortage of males. In the Islamic world, men are publicly and unashamedly religious—often more so than women. Of the world’s great religions, only Christianity has a consistent, nagging shortage of men.
“Promise Keepers at Work”, a publication of Focus on the Family, indicates:
* If a child is the first person in a household to become a Christian, there is a 3.5% probability that everyone else in the household will follow.
* If a mother is the first, there is a 17% probability that everyone in the household will follow.
* If the father is the first person in the household to become a Christian, there is a 93% probability that everyone else will follow.
Someone has said, “Jesus had no trouble captivating men. Fishermen dropped nets full of fish to follow Him, but today’s church can’t convince men to drop their TV remote controls for a couple of hours a week.”
Paul says to men: If you want to be a real man, “stand firm in the faith!” Men are to stand firm in both holding and defending the truths of the Gospel.
Paul says in 2 Timothy 4:3-4 that “the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables.”
We are in those days.
* You are not a strong Christian man if you do not know what you believe.
* You are not a strong Christian man if you cannot open the Scriptures and show someone how you got saved. (If you cannot show someone from the Word of God how they can be saved, how is that you know you are saved yourself—can the blind lead the blind?)
* You are not a strong Christian soldier if you don’t know how to use your weapon.
During basic training, drill instructors tell their recruits that they cannot earn the title 'Marine' until they learn to accurately fire the M16 service rifle.
In 2 Timothy 2:15 Paul tells Timothy, “Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, handling accurately the word of truth.” In other words, you are not an unashamed, approved workman unless you are accurately handling the Word of Truth!
Paul says to men: If you want to be a real man, “stand firm in the faith!”
Act like men
Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. (1 Cor 16:13)
Today we have a lot of men who look physically like a man, their chromosomes say they are a man, at times they let you know from their B.O. that they are a man, they can even produce a child like a man but that is where it stops.
Here in our text, Paul says to the Corinthian men, “act like men.” Paul would say to the individual, “act like a man!” It means in the original text, “to render one manly or brave. It means to show one’s self a man, that is, not to be a coward or timid or alarmed at the enemy; but to be bold and brave.
The times in which we live demand men to be men, but sadly there is an effort underway to suppress the male image. One "progressive" family therapist put it this way: "Cities full of men stomping around flexing their muscles and growling manly noises at one another have become our modern jungles. Men fight for turf and wrestle for control over people and things, whether through war, armed robbery, or corporate takeovers . . . Heavy doses of masculinity are unquestionably toxic, and no longer socially acceptable.” This was written by a man!
Even in the church there is the suppression of the male image. Last year I shared my thoughts on this subject and there were some who were uncomfortable with it and some even got angry. One person even accused me of “trying to control the women.”
God has made men and women different. That we are different anatomically or physically is obvious. But we are also different psychologically and emotionally. Men are drawn to risk, challenge and adventure. But these things are discouraged in the local church. Instead, most congregations offer predictability—no surprises—they have an “order of service.”
They are programmed from start to finish, from opening prayer to the benediction. Studies show that women and seniors gravitate toward these things. In contrast to this, the Great Commission is one of adventure—the Bible says, “Go into all the world and make disciples of all nations; baptizing them in the Name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit; teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded and lo I am with you, even until the end of the age.” You can’t get any more adventurous than that.
However, the actual mission of most congregations is making people feel safe and secure-especially longtime members. A sign with the words, “Don’t Rock the Boat” should be hung over most church entrances.
Here is a question for you to ponder: How did Christianity, founded by a man and his 12 male disciples, become the territory of women? We have already seen that the typical U.S. Congregation draws an adult crowd that’s 61% female, 39% male.
There is a pattern of feminization in Christianity going back at least 700 years, according to Dr. Leon Podles, author of The Church Impotent: the Feminization of Christianity. But the ball really got rolling in the 1800s. With the dawning of the industrial revolution, large numbers of men sought work in mines, mills and factories, far from home and church. Women stayed behind, and began remaking the church in their image. The Victorian era saw the rise of church nurseries, Sunday schools, lay choirs, quilting circles, ladies’ teas, soup kitchens, girls’ societies, potluck dinners, etc.
Soon, the very definition of a good Christian had changed: boldness and aggression were out; passivity and receptivity were in. Christians were to be gentle, sensitive and nurturing, focused on home and family rather than the bodacious ministry of the Gospel. Believers were not supposed to like sex, tobacco, dancing or other “worldly” pleasures. The “godly” were always calm, polite and sociable.
Consider with me a description found in Hebrews 11 of those who overcame their faith in God. The writer of this book reminds us how “By faith the walls of Jericho fell down after they were encircled for seven days. By faith the harlot Rahab did not perish with those who did not believe, when she had received the spies with peace. Through faith many subdued kingdoms, worked righteousness, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, quenched the violence of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, out of weakness were made strong, became valiant in battle, turned to flight the armies of the aliens. Women received their dead raised to life again. And others were tortured, not accepting deliverance, that they might obtain a better resurrection.”
Even a cursory reading of the New Testament book of Acts leaves us with the same feeling of excitement.
Does this sound like most churches in the United States today? There is an un-masculine spirit that dominates our churches. Those of us who grew up in church hardly notice it; we can’t imagine things any other way. But an unchurched male visitor detects this spirit the moment he walks in the sanctuary door. At church events he must watch his language, mind his manners and be extra polite—even quiet. It’s hard for a man to be real in church because he must squeeze himself into this un-masculine religious mold.
Some guys are happy with church just as it is, and see no need for change. Others are the sensitive type and actually like the warmth and the embrace and the hugs. But try to see church through the eyes of a typical guy. It’s intimidating for a man to hold hands in a circle, to cry in public, or to imagine falling deeply in love with another man (even if his name is Jesus).
Many churches have found that attempts to start a men’s ministry end in failure? Why? Here’s an example of a typical men’s small group. See if you can figure out why it would fail: Tony went to men’s small group at his church—once. First, the men sat in a circle and sang praise songs for about ten minutes. Tony was asked to introduce himself and share about his life. Next, he was paired with a stranger and asked to share one of his deepest fears. Then, everyone was asked to share a prayer need or a praise report. The men read from the Bible, taking turns around the circle. Finally, the men stood in a circle and held hands for what seemed like hours, while one by one they bared their souls to God. One man was quietly weeping. The guy next to Tony prayed for ten minutes straight, and his palms were sweaty. Once the meeting was over, Tony didn’t stay for cookies. He hasn’t been back.
Men’s ministry so often flounders for this simple reason: it’s actually women’s ministry for men. When Christian men gather, they’re expected to relate like women and to enjoy the things women enjoy. Most men’s ministry is built around the needs and expectations of women. So the men’s retreat features singing, hugging, hand holding, and weeping. Men sit in circles and listen, read, or share. We keep our conversations clean, polite, and non-confrontational.
While there’s nothing wrong with men doing these things, it feels feminine to a lot of guys. So they stay home. Sometimes men’s ministry fails because of the labels we use. Some years ago, a man was invited to a “Men’s Purity Conference” at a local church. He says that he did not attend. It sounded like they were trying to turn men into bars of soap. Men don’t want to be pure as snow: they want to be dangerous warriors for God’s kingdom.
Don’t get me wrong; purity is important to the Christian man. But if purity is the goal we are going to fail. Men must see purity as the means to achieving a higher goal. For men, the higher goal must be “the battle.” Purity is one of the means by which we can prepare to accomplish the task that our Commander in Chief, Jesus Christ has assigned us to do as men.
When we make purity a goal in itself, we lose men. The same results take place when we make “personal holiness” or a “quiet time” or even a “passionate, intimate relationship with Jesus” the primary goal of Christianity. As men, we do these things only to prepare ourselves for the battle.
An athlete will go through rigorous hours of training and days of self denial looking forward to that day in the boxing ring or time on the football field or basketball court. My brother-in-law Chris loves to play Paintball—when those balls hit you it hurts and leaves a mark on your body for weeks—but it is the battle that keeps him coming back for more. A man will even push aside sexual intimacy if his mind is on the battle. David could not get Uriah to go home to his wife because Uriah was a faithful soldier.
In our text Paul says, “act like men!” This means “to render one manly. Many churches today do not have an environment where men feel comfortable being men. Illust: Men’s trip to DC. I returned exhilarated, wanting to do it again.
On a recruiting brochure for the U.S. Army, bold letters on the front cover invite one to Rise to the Challenge. As you read, notice the masculine imagery and language:
If you’re looking for a job that will challenge you from day one, look no further than the U.S. Army. As a Soldier in the Army of One, you’ll engage in life faster and better than most people your age . . . you’ll experience things that you never thought possible and go places most people only read about. You’ll learn your capabilities, sharpen your skills and then push yourself to the limit on a daily basis. You’ll grow stronger, physically, mentally, and feel a sense of pride you’ve never felt before.
This ad copy can teach us a lot about men. Listen to what it promises: challenge, rising above the rest, adventure, increased competence, skill, endurance, strength, and pride. It’s competitive: you’ll be faster, better, and stronger than the rest. With such imagery the army attracts sixty to eighty thousand volunteers each year, most of them men.
I want to encourage our men to feel free to act like men! Take a personal inventory of your gifts and abilities and use them for the glory of God in His church. Many men stand for excellence, strategic thinking, progress, efficiency, vision, controlled risks, bottom-line performance. If you stand for these things, roll back your sleeves and let’s get things going in this church!
be strong
1 Cor 16:13 Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.
This means to “be firm, fixed and steadfast.” Paul is referring to the maturity of a man. In Ephesians 4:14, Paul writes “that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting…”
When Paul writes, “be strong” he is speaking of a diligence and commitment that is found only in the mature.
Someone has said that “men have the attention span of gnats.” A question for women: How often has the man in your life said something like, “I will do such and such” and then forget they made a commitment until you remind them of it.
Jesus talked about men like these in Matthew chapter five where He describes them as so dishonest they have to make oaths and “swear on a stack of bibles” in order to get people to believe them. Addressing men like these He says, "Just let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No.' For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.”
Paul exhorts men to “be strong, be fixed and steadfast” because there are men who stand on the truth only until something comes around that tickles their ears. Paul writes in 2 Timothy 4 about those who “want to have their ears tickled, they will accumulate for themselves teachers in accordance to their own desires; and will turn away their ears from the truth, and will turn aside to fables.” (2 Tim 4:3-4).
Paul is saying in our text, Be strong—be firm, fixed and steadfast. Act like a man and keep your commitments:
* If you are married, keep your commitment and honor your vows made before God to your wife. The grass always looks greener from the other side but you are looking from a distance. If you take a closer look you will find weeds there too.
* Be strong; honor your word; keep your promises with your children.
* Keep your commitment to your church family; don’t be a “fair weather” friend.
* Be dedicated in your ministry—be on time to church. Be at your post. Don’t be a slacker when it comes to your tithes and offering.
* Be faithful to your employer—get to work on time—don’t loft; don’t under perform.
* Fulfill your obligations with your creditors. Pay your bills and do so on time!
Act like a man; be strong!
Act like a man! Act like Jesus!
We’ve seen that the church has turned Jesus into a feminine person. If you ask most guys, ‘Who is Jesus?’ they would say, ‘Well, He’s a kind and sweet and caring, tender, loving, compassionate, long-haired green-eyed hippie.’ That’s the picture most of us had of Jesus hanging on the wall, the picture where His eyes follow you across the room. Well it’s true; Jesus is caring, tender, loving, and compassionate. When you were hurting, Jesus was the epitome of tender mercy. But there’s another side of Jesus that doesn’t get preached.
Many men’s early conception of Jesus comes from Sunday School and Vacation Bible School teachers — all women. When men read the Bible for themselves, they’ll meet another Jesus, who was "the epitome of masculinity."
In our text Paul says to men, “Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.” Jesus was all of these things.
Jesus was always on the alert, always watchful. The Bible says, in Matthew 16 that Jesus began to show to His disciples that He must go to Jerusalem, and suffer, be killed, and be raised the third day. Then Peter took Him aside and began to rebuke Him, saying, "Far be it from You, Lord; this shall not happen to You!" But Jesus turned and said to Peter, "Get behind Me, Satan! He knew that Satan was trying to use Peter to detour Jesus away from the work of Calvary.
Not only was Jesus on the alert, He was steadfast in the faith. Jesus knew the Scriptures. When Satan tried to tempt Jesus in the wilderness, Jesus defended Himself with the sword of the Spirit, the Word of God.
After His resurrection, Jesus appeared to some disciples on the Emmaus Road. The Bible says in Luke 24, “beginning at Moses and all the Prophets, He expounded to them in all the Scriptures the things concerning Himself.” After Jesus left their presence the disciples said to one another, "Did not our heart burn within us while He talked with us on the road, and while He opened the Scriptures to us?"
Not only was Jesus on the alert, and steadfast in the faith, He acted like a man! He was provocative. He didn’t run away from fights. In exposing their hypocrisy, He picked fights with the Pharisees. Reading the Bible you will find a Jesus who was a strong-armed carpenter before Black and Decker and Home Depot ever came into existence.
Not only was Jesus on the alert, and steadfast in the faith, and not only did He act like a man, He was strong—He was firm, fixed and steadfast on His mission. He was committed to the reason He came to this earth.
He said in John 4:34, "My food is to do the will of Him who sent Me, and to finish His work.” In John 6:38 He said, "For I have come down from heaven, not to do My own will, but the will of Him who sent Me.”
When the Judas betrayed Him into the hands of the Pharisees, Jesus’ disciples took out their swords and Jesus stopped them saying, “Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and he will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels? But how then would the Scriptures be fulfilled that say it must happen in this way?" (Mat 26:53)
The ultimate characteristic of biblical masculinity is you have the power to absolutely break everybody in the room ... but you humble yourself. The Bible teaches that Jesus was God Almighty but He became a servant and humbled Himself to the point of death even the death of the Cross.
While He was hanging on the cross the people mocked Him saying, "If You are the King of the Jews, save Yourself.” But He stayed there, undeterred and finished the work of salvation. He would not come down from the cross just to save Himself; He decided to die just to save me.
Aren’t you glad that He stayed there? Aren’t you glad He was watchful, steadfast, acted like a man and was strong?
