Please open your Bibles to Ephesians 5, as we begin a new series called “I Love My Church.”
You know, our lives are basically made up of two different kinds of places. There are places we have to go, and there are places we get to go. School. That’s a have to go place, isn’t it? Although, after the kind of year we’ve had, it was kind of cool to hear kids talking about “getting” to go back to school again.
Disney World. That’s a “get to go” place isn’t it? A cruise. The beach. All get to go places.
A college football game. That’s a “get to go” experience. Unless you’re a Missouri fan, and you got Alabama as your first game this season. Sorry, Kim.
What about some “have to go” places? I’m going to put an image of a place up on the screen, and I want you to say the first word that comes to mind about how people typically feel in regard to having to go to these locations. Give me a word.
• 1st image: DMV Definitely a “have to go” place. It’s an obligation to fulfill. Nobody looks forward to going to the DMV, but we all know we have to, at least once every so often. We need to get our license renewed. We need to pay our vehicle registration. But once we fulfill that obligation, we don’t even think about the DMV again.
• 2nd image: Doctor’s office: Again, probably not on anyone’s top ten list of preferred destinations. Sometimes we go for a regular checkup. Sometimes we go because we are in pain, or something isn’t working right. Our hope is that there’s going to be a pill or a shot or a cream that will make the problem go away. Or maybe the doctor will recommend a lifestyle change, or more exercise, or whatever. We dread hearing that there is a major diagnosis, but most of us will listen to the doctor and do what it takes to make the problem go away.
• 3rd image: Grocery store: How about this one? Actually, there are some times that I really enjoy going to the grocery store. (Trish is looking at me like, “Really?” I think she just took a note). But no, I’m serious—if there’s a special recipe that I want to try, I like shopping for the ingredients. I like the spice aisle. But… yeah. Most of the time this is just another place that we have to go because we know we need to eat. We know we can’t go without food, so we have to shop. We have to prepare. And if you’re a parent, you have to provide for your kids.
So you look at these three, and before you say, “Yeah, I know where he’s going with this: Is church a “Get to go” place, or is it a “have to go” place. Think about it:
• Is church like the DMV for you? An obligation to fulfill? A box that you check off once a week? Or once a month? Or twice a year?
• Is church like a visit to the doctor for you? A place you go to solve a problem or treat a condition? Where the doctor makes you feel guilty for something you’re doing too much or not enough of, and tries to scare you with the terrible consequences if you don’t listen to his advice?
• Is church a place you go because you you know you need nourishment from God’s Word. Or even if you don’t feel like you do, you go so your kids can learn about Jesus?
So you are probably saying, ok, I get it. These are all bad reasons to go to church. And actually, they’re not that bad.
We do have an obligation to fulfill by coming to church. Hebrews 10:24-25 says, And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, 25 not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another.
We do have a condition that needs to be treated. We have a congenital birth defect called sin that, if left untreated, is fatal. We know that from Romans 6:23. But church is the place where we learn about the cure.
We do have a hunger that can must be satisfied. Amos 8:11 describes a famine of hearing the words of the Lord. And a church that is faithfully, consistently preaching and teaching God’s Word can satisfy that famine like nothing else.
So none of these are bad reasons for coming to church. And even if they were, I’m pretty sure I’d rather have you show up for church for the wrong reason than not show up at all.
But the truth is, none of these are likely to bring you back if you’ve gotten out of the habit of going to church. Going to church is habit forming, but so is skipping church. Recent surveys about church attendance suggest that, while once upon a time “regular church attendance” meant 3-4 Sundays a month, people now consider themselves regular church attenders if they come one or two Sundays a month.
And that was before the pandemic. Let’s be honest, after several weeks of having church buildings closed, its been pretty easy to behave like its still closed. Even some of the people who were the most vocal about how the government couldn’t stop people from going to church and how we should be seen as essential businesses, well, you still haven’t come back. Could be because you’re still a little nervous. Could be because you’re a little ticked off that we’re asking you to wear a mask. Or it could be that you have realized how much more comfortable your couch is than a church pew. Or how nice it is to get to the lake early. And you’re thinking, well, I can still get my church in on youtube later in the week. Do I really need to show up on a Sunday morning?
If that’s you, let me suggest a fourth image of a place we are required to go, but has a totally different feeling.
4th image: wedding reception: How many of you have ever been to a really great rehearsal dinner for a wedding? Now, like the other three, this was something you were required to attend. Maybe you had a role to play in the wedding ceremony. You were the preacher. Or a bridesmaid. Or a family member. Or the groom! But even though it was an obligation, it had a totally different feel. Why? Because you were celebrating. Jesus Himself used this analogy when He referred to Himself as the bridegroom. One day when John’s disciples asked Jesus why His disciples didn’t fast like they did, Jesus’ response was:
“Can the wedding guests mourn as long as the bridegroom is with them? The days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast (Matthew 9:15)
So even though a wedding reception is a “have to” place, hopefully you see it as a “get to” place. You get to be a part of witnessing a joyful union! You have a part to play in two people coming together and making a lifetime commitment to one another.
And so as we begin a series called “I love my church,” I want to suggest to you this morning that there might not be a better metaphor for what church is all about than a wedding rehearsal. One of the most dominant images of the church in the New Testament is that the church is the bride of Christ. Paul used it in Ephesians 5, and this is our central passage for the morning, so if you are physically able I’d like you to stand to honor the reading of God’s Word:
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.[a] 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
This passage is where the title of the sermon comes from. I hope that all of you can say, “I Love My Church!” But before we say it, Jesus said it. Before any church is “our church,” every church is His church. So after we pray, I want to spend the rest of this morning talking about what Jesus means when He says, “I love my church,” from Ephesians 5.
Let’s pray…
So let’s look at this phrase: I Love My Church. Before we say it, Jesus says it. Let’s look at it, word by word. We’ll work backwards, starting with Church.
This might surprise you, but Jesus only used the word “church” twice. He used it in Matthew 18, when He was talking about conflict resolution. And He used it in Matthew 16, after Peter (we talked about him last week) confessed that Jesus was the Christ, the son of the living God. He said,
17 “Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father who is in heaven. 18 And I tell you, you are Peter, and on this rock[b] I will build my church, and the gates of hell[c] shall not prevail against it.
And that’s it. That’s the first time the word church shows up in the New Testament. And if we are going to be faithful to the Greek, it maybe shouldn’t even be there. Because, unlike most of the words in our Bible that are translations from Greek or Hebrew, church is a substitution for a Greek word. The word Jesus used was ecclesia, which literally means “the called out ones.” Kaleo is the Greek verb “to call,” and “ek” is a prefix meaning out, or out of. An “ecclesia” is a gathering or an assembly of “called out ones.” So the better translation here is “assembly.”
This is so important because it reminds us that the church was never supposed to be thought of primarily as a building. It was always supposed to mean people. Called out ones. It wasn’t until 1382, when John Wycliffe substituted the old English word chirche for the Latin ecclesium that the word “church” started being used. People who study language aren’t 100% sure why. Some say it’s a mashup of the Greek phrase kyrios oikos, or house of the Lord. Others say it comes from the Celtic word for circle, and reflects that early Christians would gather to worship in a circle.
Regardless of how the word came into use, its been distracting us for about a thousand years now, because we started to think that Jesus intended to build a building. And we got all upset during the pandemic when we heard about states that were “closing churches.” Let me be clear:
THE CHURCH THAT JESUS LOVES IS NOT A BUILDING. The church that Jesus built is not a building. The church is a gathering of people.
And Jesus loves people. Let’s look next at the word “LOVE”
Our text for this morning begins with “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church.” The Greek word for love here is “agape.” There have been a bazillion sermons preached on what this word means, and how it’s different from other Greek words for love—romantic love, brotherly love, family love, and so forth. If you’re interested, The Four Loves by CS Lewis is probably the best of the bunch. But this morning, we probably don’t need to spend a lot of time explaining what the word means, because Paul spends the next several verses showing us exactly how Christ loved the church, and we can learn a lot about what love means by looking at how love was expressed.
And let me caution you as we look at these verses: because this passage of Scripture deals with how husbands and wives relate to one another in a marriage relationship, we can miss what it is saying about how Christ loved the church. And its almost like Paul wants to make sure we don’t get distracted by all the talk about wives submitting to husbands, and husbands being the head of the wife. Its easy to tune it out. But do you notice that from verse 23 to verse 32, Paul uses the word “Church” the exact same number of times as he uses the word “wife?” Six times:
• Christ is the head of the church (v. 23)
• The church submits to Christ (v. 24)
• Christ loved the church (v. 25)
• Christ presents the church to Himself (v. 27)
• Christ nourishes and cherishes the church (verse 29)
And, just to put a cherry on top and make sure that there isn’t any confusion, he spells it out in verse 32: “This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church.”
So don’t just think of Ephesians 5 as the “wives submitting to their husbands” passage. It’s just as much the “Christ loves the church” passage.
So with that thought in mind, let’s look at how Christ loves the church:
First, He gave Himself up for his church (v. 25) This means that He put the needs of the church above His own needs. Of course, the ultimate example of this is the Cross. We know from the time we spent in the Gospel of Mark that Jesus’ personal preference was to avoid the Cross: “Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me.” But Jesus gave Himself up for us. And remember, church is the people, not the building. So if we are going to love the church the way Jesus loved the church, it means that we consider the needs of the rest of the body of Christ ahead of our own. Now this can be hard for us to do, because we come to church as consumers. We choose a church because we like a certain style of music, or a certain way of dressing, or a certain set of traditions. And if any of those things change, we get our feathers ruffled: “I don’t like some of the changes that new preacher is making to my church.”
So if we are going to love the church the way Christ loved the church, we have to realize, its not about us. Let me ask you: is there anything you need to give up about your own personal preferences that would make church more accessible to someone else?
Second, he sanctifies his church (v. 26). When something is sanctified, that means it is set apart. It is made holy. It is no longer used for common purposes. Something that is sanctified is used for God’s purposes. And that’s what we are. Remember, church is people, not a building. This is the ecclesia—the called out ones. God has a purpose for the church in the world. We aren’t supposed to be like the rest of the world. Peter describes us as a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a people for God’s own possession, that we may proclaim the excellencies of him who called us out of darkness into his marvelous light.
Third, he cleanses his church. Paul says he does this through the washing of water with the Word. So when the church messes up, God uses His Word to show us where. When the church gets off track, God uses His Word to bring us back.
You know, it seems like every time the church is in the news, it seems to be because some high profile mega-church pastor gets caught doing something wrong. And its sad, and its embarrassing, and its heartbreaking, and it might lead someone to say, “Good grief… what’s wrong with the church?” But the truth is that these stories, as embarrassing as they are, actually point to something that is very right with the church. Jesus in continually in the process of cleansing his church. It can be painful, but Christ is committed to cleansing His bride.
This is true for individual members of the church as well. Sometimes you’re going to hear things at church that make you uncomfortable. You’ll hear truths about yourself that you don’t always want to face. One of the clichés about church is that it comforts the afflicted, but it also afflicts the comfortable! This is all part of God’s commitment to cleanse his church through the washing of water with the Word.
And why does Christ cleanse His bride? It’s so He can display her. Show her off. Verse 27 is beautiful:
27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
Those of you who are married—ladies, do you remember how beautiful you looked and felt on your wedding day? Do you remember the hours you spent on hair, makeup, nails—the dress?
A couple of months ago I officiated the wedding of a young couple here at Glynwood. The bride had chosen a country song called “Speechless” for her walk-in song. The song builds up to the chorus, which says, “I’m speechless, staring at you standing there in that dress, watching you is all I can do…” Stephanie had timed the whole thing so that the back door opened and she started walking toward Ryan right at the moment the song got to the “I’m speechless” line. I was standing next to Ryan, the groom, and I promise you, he gasped. At that moment, the bride literally took his breath away!
And do you realize that is how Jesus feels about His church? We are the bride of Christ! You are breathtaking to Him. We—the church, are beautiful, spotless, splendid, without spot, wrinkle, blemish, or any such thing!
And because we are so beautiful to him—man—nobody better say anything bad about the church to Jesus.
I want you to know I love my wife. Twenty-seven years later, twenty-eight in December, and she is still beautiful to me. Yes, we have arguments. No, she doesn’t laugh at all my jokes. But she is my bride. And people know not to say anything bad around me about my wife, because they know if they do they’re gonna have problems with me.
Beloved, that is how Jesus feels about His church.
Verse 29 says that Christ nourishes His church (v. 29) He does this by making sure she is fed with sound doctrine and good teachers. By the same token, he cherishes the church. To cherish something is to treasure it. Protect it. Hold it close. Secure it. Just as the church is nourished with sound doctrine and good teachers, she is guarded and protected from false teachers and bad doctrine. In our Wednesday night study, we have been studying the book of Titus, and last week we read about the danger of false teachers. And did you know that almost every New Testament writer has something to say about false teaching and false teachers? All four gospels. The majority of Paul’s letters. Peter. John. Jude. The New Testament is constantly dealing with this topic.
This is the season where we are working on recruiting small group leaders and Sunday school teachers for the fall. And to be honest, we are having as hard a time as I’ve seen a church have making sure every class has teachers. [Talk more about this]
Finally, Christ is faithful to his church . Verse 31 says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. And again, just to make sure we stay focused on what this passage is really about, Paul wraps this up with verse 32: this mystery is profound, but I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. Jesus loves His church, and he is never going to forsake her. He’s never going to get tired of her and trade her in for a newer model. He’s going to be there when its hard. He’s going to keep his promises to her. He’s not going to abandon her for the next trendy thing. When she hurts His feelings, He’s not going to walk away.
And dear friends, if this is how Jesus loves His church, isn’t this how we ought to love His church?
The phrase is “I love my church.” But before we can ever say “I Love My Church,” Jesus has said “I Love My Church.” Before Glynwood is our church, Glynwood is His church.
1 John 4 says,
19 We love because he first loved us. 20 If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. 21 And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.
Jesus has given us the standard for what it means to love the church, and before we say it, He said it. We love because he first loved us.
Let’s pray.
