You are what you Value!
February 9, 2020
I’ve never built a home, and if I was to build a home, I would hope I wouldn’t hire some of my favorite carpenters. This was one of their attempts to build a home for their wives . . .
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Hopefully I wouldn’t be quite so bad. If you’re going to build a house, or any type of structure, you need to start with something that is absolutely vital. You must start with a foundation. And your foundation must be right. You can’t be off or your structure will be off as well.
Well, we’ve been building up towards having a better understanding of our purpose in life. Last we started looking at the fact that God has a plan and a purpose for your life. And as I was thinking about moving into that first aspect of our purpose, I realized, I needed to slow down and take my time so that we would have a solid foundation, so we could better understand who we are called to be in Christ.
Today I want to talk about our values. Because as I was thinking about this message, I realized that we live our lives according to what we value. And one of the big stressors in life occurs when we aren’t living according to our values.
So, how can we do that? I kind of want to lay down the foundation as we look at values and how we can stay true to those values. We need to live lives in which our values and our actions are congruent.
I don’t think we realize how much our values play into the decisions we make. In many respects, our values control everything we do. Every time we make a decision, we're filtering that decision subconsciously or unconsciously through our values grid. If your values are right it will lead to growth and maturity. If your values are wrong, you’ll eventually crash and burn.
Your values also effects your salvation. Jesus said it’s possible to be outwardly successful - financially, socially and every other way - and yet, be spiritually bankrupt. In Matthew 15, Jesus said –
25 For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
26 For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? - Matthew 15:25-26
Do you hear what Jesus was saying? What is it really going to get you if you gain all the material goods, all the social glamour, all the prestige, if it means you don’t know Jesus? It’s not going to be a good ending. You are what you value. And for the rest of our time, I want to try to start to lay a foundation for our values, so that our values and our faith and our actions are all in agreement.
Our first decision is a decision about where we’re going to get our values from?
The source of your values will determine the quality of your values. For instance, would you consider the National Enquirer a good source for values? How about TV talk shows? The source determines how valuable your priorities are.
In reality, we get our values from a lot of places. We pick them up from our parents, friends, from books and magazines, from music, movies, television programs, from social media . . . and more.
Think about this . . . Americans spend an average of 2'20" per day on social media. Add to that adults watch between 4 and 6 hours per day of television. That may mean 1/4 to 1/3 of your day is on social media and television. Studies indicate we will spend 8 years of our lives watching television and 6 years on social media.
If you attended church to worship God for one hour per week for 50 weeks per year, you would spend 4 months of your life worshiping God.
Four months compared to over 10 years . . . so you tell me where we are getting our values from?
In 1 John 2:15-16, the apostle John wrote --
15 Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.
16 For all that is in the world — the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of possessions — is not from the Father but is from the world. - 1 John 2:15-16
Don’t tell me the Bible is outdated! This applied 2000 years ago, and seems to be more relevant today! In a strange way, the world's values haven’t changed. We tend to want what the world is throwing out at us.
And let me add . . . as a parent, it’s really difficult to tell your kids they can’t have what everyone else has. It’s a competitive world and we don’t want our kids to fall behind, or not have what all of the other kids have, but what values are we holding onto when we give in to the values of the world? That’s a daily tension for every parent. And I recognize that! I’ve been there, and I’m still there!
So, the media bombards us with thoughts telling us we need more possessions, we need a better car, we need to eat certain food, drink certain drinks, wear certain clothes - - and so on. Why? Because if we do, we will be better liked. We’ll have the cool friends hanging out with us. We’ll be more popular, we’ll have it made! But will we?
In Romans 12:2, Paul wrote --
2 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind,
that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. - Romans 12:2
Paul’s point is that when we conform to the world’s ways, we end up not being transformed by God, but we’re transformed by the world, buying into the worlds ways and we lose the ability to test and discern God’s will. Our filter isn’t God’s word, our filter, or values - is what the world demands.
So, when we use other sources for our values, we will miss out on following God and miss out on learning God's purpose for our lives.
The psalmist tells us in Psalm 1 –
1 Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, or stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
2 but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. – Psalm 1:1-2
Add to that so many passages from Psalm 119 -
9 How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to your word.
10 With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments!
11 I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you. - Psalm 119:9-11
Add to that what Paul wrote in 2 Timothy 3:16-17 --
16 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness,
17 that the person of God may be complete, equipped for every good work. - 2 Timothy 3:16-17
You see, the Bible is good for us. The Bible instructs us and helps us to know God better. And if we know God better, then that helps us in our desire to follow Him in all that we do. Without knowing the Bible, we struggle to know some of what is right and wrong.
This leads into the next way to help us have healthy values. And this one is a difficult one, because it causes us a lot of stress.
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The stress occurs when our values and our actions are not in agreement. It’s easy to have happen in our lives. When we recognize this, we find ourselves really stressed, because this brings internal conflict. Let me give you a few examples.
If I were to ask most of you, ‘what’s the most important thing to you?’ There’s a good chance you would say family. My family is the most important thing in my life. Yet, we stress over the amount of time spent with our family. We work long days, are tired, use the TV and social media to pacify the kids, we buy them stuff to make up for time away. It’s been said the average father spends less than 20 minutes per day with his children. Yet, we say family is most important.
We might add, ‘my health is really important to me.’ Do you exercise? No. Do you eat right? No. Do you sleep right? No. But my health is important.
We would add that we are not materialistic as well. But one look at America and these are true - we’re going deeper into debt. We owe more on credit cards. We’re not saving money. Yet, we say we're not materialistic!
Let me give you 2 more examples. One occurred this past Tuesday night. I can’t help it. Our political system is broken. It’s been broken for years and years. We have elected officials who would say they want what’s best for America. They want a United America. Yet on Tuesday we witnessed a divided America. It can be summed up in 2 pictures -
Trump not shaking Pelosi’s hand - - - and Pelosi ripping Trump’s speech. That leaves America on edge.
Lastly, it comes in our spiritual lives. We say ‘God’s number one in my life.’ But we give Him our leftover time. We give Him our leftover money, we don’t put Him first. Are we praying? Are we reading the Bible? If something better comes up, we do it, with no thought about who God is. So is God really first. I know I’m stepping on toes. But if we are to be really healthy and find God’s purpose in our lives, we need to understand what it is we value.
When our values and actions are not congruent - - we experience stress.
I generally don’t like to use paraphrase versions of the Bible, but in the paraphrase, The Message, Eugene Peterson says this about Ephesians 4:17-21 -
And so I insist — that there be no going along with the crowd, the empty-headed, mindless crowd.
They’ve refused for so long to deal with God that they’ve lost touch not only with God but with reality itself. They can’t think straight anymore.
But that’s no life for you. Everything — and I do mean everything — connected with that old way of life has to go.
Get rid of it! And then take on an entirely new way of life — a God-fashioned life, a life renewed from the inside.
Does that make sense? Does that describe us? Paul’s saying that shift in our values, starts with a focus on God.
It’s not easy to change! We talk about it, but never get there. Sometimes, we don’t have the energy and drive to get there. We want it, but we’re already so tired and feeling so overburdened.
And you're right. That's why you need God. That's why you need Jesus Christ. God gives you the power to do what He’s calling you to do. You can't do this on your own. You've tried to change - - and it never lasts. Trust me, I’ve been there. We need God's power.
Paul wrote that great passage which encourages us –
13 I can all things through Christ who strengthens me. - Philippians 4:13
We get God’s power to help us. He’s our power source.
To do that, we have to do more than just decide or write them down on a piece of paper. We’ve got to make this a daily endeavor. It’s doing the hard work in Christ. But it’s trusting that Jesus is going to be there for us and with us. He’s not going to bail out on us when we mess up. He promises to be with us.
It’s taking the small steps of trusting God in areas of your life you possibly never have. It’s becoming more vulnerable with God.
It’s going back to what I spoke about a few weeks ago . . . everyday you put on the full armor of God. Remember what Paul tells us --
10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might.
11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.
13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm.
14 Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness,
15 and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace.
16 In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one;
17 and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God - Ephesians 6:11-17
We need to protect ourselves, to know that the things of the world will creep in, it will happen without our realizing it, which is why we need to be protected from the schemes of satan. He will trick you and deceive you.
But with the help of the Spirit of God, we can withstand the deception and move closer and closer to having our values and our actions be in alignment, which creates less stress and moves us closer to God and better understanding his purpose in our lives.
