Love Is Kind
#LoveIs
OKAY – let’s do this.
Week three of our series, ‘Love Is’
NOW…
IN WEEK ONE - we talked about ‘The Unrelenting Love Of God.’
LAST WEEK – we unpack the truth that love is patient and discussed some practical ways that we could develop our ‘Makrothymia.’ Makro – slow, Thymia – burning
QUESTION – was anyone’s makrothymia tested this past week?
NOW – before we jump into our next Love Is statement (Love Is Kind)… I just want to remind you that this love thing, is like, a really huge deal…
I MEAN – just lean into the following Scriptures…
I give you a new command: Love one another. Just as I have loved you, you must also love one another. By this all people will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another. - John 13:34-35
Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law. – Romans 13:8
The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love. – Galatians 5:6
Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins. – 1 Peter 4:8
Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.
God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.
Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other. No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us. – 1 John 4:7-12
MGCC LOVE - really IS A…
big, huge, massive, enormous, gargantuan, great, gigantic, immense, significant, serious, essential, critical, crucial, imperative, indispensable, important DEAL!!!
AMEN.
AND – what if… what if you… what if I, what if the people sitting around you (go ahead and take a look)…
WHAT IF – instead of merely skimming the surface and skirting the edges, what if we stop mere sticking our toes and instead dove head first into the depths of God’s kind love…
Prayer
OKAY – here is what we are going to do this, morning as we unpack the truth that love is kind…
USING – a story, an event in David’s life, that is found in 2 Samuel chapter 9.
A story that will provide us with several practical lessons that will help us to live out in our lives, ‘Love Is Kind…’
As 2 Samuel chapter 9 opens up David has been king of Israel for many years. He has won many countless victories.
He has firmly established himself as King.
AND HE – is now enjoying a time of relative peace and quiet throughout the kingdom…
THAT – is basically where we are when this story begins to unfold.
One day David asked, “Is anyone in Saul’s family still alive—anyone to whom I can show kindness for Jonathan’s sake?”
2 Samuel 9:1
OKAY… let me give you a little back story here.
• Saul was the first king of Israel
• Now, he started out good, but ended up not so good
• Jonathan was His Son and heir to the throne
• And Jonathan and David became best friends shortly after David killed Goliath.
NOW – if you think about it, these two should’ve been bitter enemies… they really should have.
I MEAN - when someone takes something that you were expecting… AND THAT - you thought was already yours (like a throne, a crown and a kingdom), it usually creates a lot of conflict.
SO LIKE I SAID – you would think that these guys would be bitter enemies who would battle throughout all of their lives.
LIKE…
The Democrats and the Republicans,
like the Yankees and the Red Sox,
like UVA and VT
YEAH THAT - should have been Jonathan and David’s story.
But it wasn’t.
AGAIN - Jonathan was King Saul’s son, AND - in many minds (including his since he was a young boy), he should have been the next king.
BUT INSTEAD – David is anointed as the next king…
AND – Jonathan was not only totally okay with it, but he became David’s best friend and his most ardent supporter.
HOWEVER – His dad King Saul had different feeling towards David. He hated David, he was jealous of David and he tried to kill him on more than one occasion.
(threw spears at him = not a friend = we got issues)
NOW - Jonathan knew that his dad didn’t like David and that he was threatened by his growing popularity, but he had a hard time believing that His dad was actually was trying to kill David.
BUT – there comes a point when Jonathan finds out that it is in fact, really true… “I can’t believe it… My dad not only wants to kill my best friend. But he wants to kill the future king that God has chosen.
SO – Jonathan and David decide that it is best for them to part ways for the time being… Jonathan would stay beside his dad, to support him, and I think also to try to keep him from killing David.
BUT BEFORE – they separate in 1 Samuel, Chapter 20, Jonathan (knowing that one day David will in fact be the King) makes an appeal of David.
May the LORD be with you as he has been with my father. But show me unfailing kindness like that of the LORD as long as I live, so that I may not be killed, and do not ever cut off your kindness from my family—not even when the LORD has cut off every one of David's enemies from the face of the earth.- 1 Samuel 20:13-15
YOU SEE - in those days it was customary when a new king took over that all the family members of the previous dynasty would be executed…. which would eliminate any possibility of a revolt.
SO - Jonathan is saying, “David, I know you’re going to be the next king, but when you take over, don’t kill me. And please spare the lives of my family.”
THEN - David affirms his kindness…
AND HE - and promises that Jonathan’s family will be treated well whenever this transition of power takes place.
AND – then they go their separate ways
IN - the years that follow… Saul and Jonathan (along with Saul’s other 2 sons) are killed in a battle with the Philistines,
WHO - decapitated all 4 of them and put their heads on top of a wall…
AND DAVID – soon after becomes the King of Israel.
Okay that’s the brief backstory to 2 Samuel 9
AGAIN…
One day David asked, “Is anyone in Saul’s family still alive—anyone to whom I can show kindness for Jonathan’s sake?”
UNDERSTSAND DAVID – is remembering the promise, the covenant, that he had made many years earlier to His good friend Jonathan…
So he summoned a man named Ziba, who had been one of Saul’s servants. “Are you Ziba?” the king asked. “Yes sir, I am,” Ziba replied. The king then asked him, “Is anyone still alive from Saul’s family? If so, I want to show God’s kindness to them.” Ziba replied, “Yes, one of Jonathan’s sons is still alive. He is crippled in both feet.” - 2 Samuel 9:2-3
NOW - this young man who was crippled is Mephibosheth, and he is the only son of Jonathan who is still alive.
QUESTION - have you ever known anyone who just never seemed to be able to get a break in life (maybe that someone is you)... well that is pretty who Mephibosheth is…
YOU SEE – he was not born crippled, but on the day that his dad (Jonathan) died and his grandfather, King Saul, died, Not a good day. Mephibosheth (who was 5 years old at the time) was in the palace back in Israel.
AND WHEN – this news reached the palace… (that the king and all of his sons are dead)… they were certain that the enemy would soon be crashing through the doors in order to kill everyone.
SO - Mephibosheth’s nurse grabs him and as she hurries out of the palace she stumbles and the young boy falls from her arms and he becomes permanently disabled…
AND LISTEN - ever since that fall (many years), he has been hiding away, fearful for his life…
“Is anyone still alive from Saul’s family? If so, I want to show God’s kindness to them.”
Ziba replied, “Yes, one of Jonathan’s sons is still alive. He is crippled in both feet.”
YOU KNOW - when Ziba answers David,
‘yeah, there is one guy left, but he’s s crippled…”
IF WE - read between the lines, I think Ziba is telling David….
“You know…well, there is one guy, but he’s disabled. He is crippled, he is not really worth worrying about. I mean, if it were me, I would not even bother…”
AND – David is like (I didn’t ask about his physical condition, In fact I don’t give a rip about his disability)
“Where is he?” the king asked. “In Lo-debar,” Ziba told him, “at the home of Makir son of Ammiel.” – 2 Samuel 9:4-5
QUESTION – where is Mephibosheth?
NOW - let me tell you about the words “Lo Debar.”
Lo means “no” and Debar means “pasture.”
SO - in other words, it was a forsaken area. There was no pasture; there was no grass. It was a desolate wasteland. No vegetation.
AND MGCC – that is where this disabled man has been spending his days since he was 5 years old (and he is probably now in his mid 20’s because he has a son of his own).
PICTURE/IMAGINE – this young man’s life…
living or should… simply existing in ‘Lo Debar’
(afraid, hiding, disabled) All because someone who should have been carrying him, dropped him when he was young… Tragically that sort of thing still happens way too many times today.
So David sent for him and brought him from Makir’s home.
AND LISTEN – I am sure that at this point in his life the last thing Mephibosheth wanted to hear was… a knock on the door, from a guy sent from the king. But that is exactly what happened.
I MEAN - can you imagine what he was thinking… when he opened the door… AND THERE STOOD - a group of soldiers, who say to him…. “The King wants to see you…”
He’s probably thinking this is it… They finally found me. I am done for. He finally has found me. I can’t believe I’ve been found out by the king. I knew I should have taken the battery out of my cell phone so they couldn’t triangulate my position…
6 His name was Mephibosheth; he was Jonathan’s son and Saul’s grandson.
Do you know what Mephibosheth means?
Now it actually has 2 contrasting meanings..
(‘shameful thing’ or ‘dispeller of shame’)…
YOU SEE - in Biblical times, people were often given names based on the situation existing at the time they were born.
Can you imagine growing up and having people call you, ‘hey, you shameful thing’? (taking role in school)
When he came to David, he bowed low to the ground in deep respect. David said, “Greetings, Mephibosheth.” Mephibosheth replied, “I am your servant.”
NOW – put yourself in Mephibosheth sandals for a moment…
LIKE – he has got to be sacred to death.
I MEAN - His father Jonathan is dead, all of his brothers are dead, he’s been hiding out in the wilderness ever since kindergarten.
AND NOW – he finds standing before a mighty warrior, King. David… A guy who killed, a lion and the giant Goliath.
(Lions and Goliath and bears, Oh my)
IN FACT - David had killed thousands of men in battle…
UNDERSTAND - this is the type of man he is standing before.
NOT – to mention that Mephibosheth’s grandfather King Saul was insane and tried to kill David, and fought a civil war against David’s army for years.
YEAH – Mephib has to be freaking out… big time.
AND LISTEN even if he had heard that David wanted to show him kindness, it was very common for kings (like politicians) to say one thing, but mean and do something pretty much the opposite..
LIKE – what King Herod says to the Wise Men, “Hey, once you find that cute little baby boy… come and tell me where He is so that I may come and worship Him.”
Herod, had no desire to worship Jesus. He wanted to kill Jesus.
UNDERSTAND - That is the way kings operated.
Mephibosheth had to think that his life was in jeopardy.
7 “Don’t be afraid!” David said. “I intend to show kindness to you because of my promise to your father, Jonathan. I will give you all the property that once belonged to your grandfather Saul, and you will eat here with me at the king’s table!”
Kindness – Hebrew ‘checed’… often translated loving kindness…
It is used 127 times in the Psalms and translated many times as steadfast love.
AND – it speaks not to God’s general love, but to His covenantal love for His people.
It’s a love that never gives up, never gives out, never gives in.
It’s an unquitting, unrelenting, unceasing kind of love.
Kindness – Greek ‘chrestos’… fit for use, useful, virtuous, good, manageable, mild, pleasant, benevolent, gracious… wine that has been aged.
Wine that has mellowed to the point where it’s acidic edge has been softened. Wine that is no longer blunt and abrasive.
Mephibosheth bowed respectfully and exclaimed, “Who is your servant, that you should show such kindness to a dead dog like me?” - 2 Samuel 9:8
Why would you do this for me?
Who I am to deserve kindness from a king?
AND YOU KNOW – I think David is like, I sooo get where you are coming from. In fact, I actually wrote a song about it… you can download it on itunes…
Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory in the heavens….When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them? - Psalm 8:1-4
YEAH – when it came to feeling unworthy and undeserving of favor… David ‘ got it.’
Then the king summoned Saul’s servant Ziba and said, “I have given your master’s grandson everything that belonged to Saul and his family.
You and your sons and servants are to farm the land for him to produce food for your master’s household. But Mephibosheth, your master’s grandson, will eat here at my table.” (Ziba had fifteen sons and twenty servants.) – 2 Samuel 9:1-11
WOW
What a life-changing moment in Mephibosheth’s life!
From ‘Lo Debar’ (no pasture, wasteland) to having everything that belonged to King Saul.
Additionally, this disabled man instantly receives three dozen servants to tend to his land and all of his needs, and on top of that the king of the land looks at him and says,
“You are going to eat every single meal at my table with me…with my family.”
Chuck Swindoll writes about this and he says, “Picture what life would be like in the years to come at the supper table with David.” He writes:
“The meal is fixed. The dinner bell rings, and in come David’s children and the guests.
There is Amnon—witty and clever.
There is Joab, one of David’s soldiers—handsome, well-built, walking tall.
Then comes Absalom, a handsome young man. Not a blemish from the crown of his head to the soles of his feet.
Then there is Tamar, the beautiful, tender daughter of David. Later Solomon comes out of the library—studious, brilliant.
In other words, the beautiful people, the impressive people, the powerful people were at that table.
Then they hear this ‘Clunk…clunk.’
Here comes Mephibosheth hobbling along down the hall.
He humbly joins the others as he takes his place at the table as one of the king’s sons, and the tablecloth of grace covers over his feet.
I love it!
I MEAN – the Bible minces no words when it says in verse 11
“So Mephibosheth ate at David's table like one of the king's sons.” 2 Samuel 9:1-11
R U kidding me…
And “Lo Debar’ was now only a shadow in his rearview mirror.
NOW - do you see why I chose this story as an example of kindness?
OKAY - so let’s make some observations from David’s example and take away some applications for our own lives… in regards to living out the truth that love is kind…
Here is the first one:
I. Unleash Kindness On Your Family And Friends
Now I chose the word unleash for a reason, check out how it is defined...
Unleash…
- to free from or as if from a leash, let loose;
- to cause a strong force to be released or become unrestrained;
- to let happen or to begin something powerful that, once begin, cannot be controlled.
Unleash kindness on your family and friends
UNDERSTAND -this overwhelming expression of kindness came about all because of David’s close friendship with Jonathan, who was Mephibosheth’s father.
NOW - you may be thinking, “Oh, come on, Steve. You don’t need to tell us to show kindness to our own family and friends. I mean, that’s a given.”
But that’s not always the case, is it?
At least - it hasn’t been my experience.
YOU SEE – a lot of times, when it comes to kindness, those who are closest to me are often the ones who get the short end of the stick.
And listen, we can so easily rationalize this… they’ll be okay.
I mean, they love me; they understand me; they’ll get over it. AND - the truth is that sometimes it is easier for us to perform a random act of kindness for a total stranger than it is for a loved one. AND – I think that is pretty messed up, don’t you?
AND LISTEN – to unleash kindness on our family and friends we can’t just sit back and wait for an opportunity to present itself.
WE NEED – to take the initiative.
IN FACT – maybe we need to even change our vocabulary a little and instead of just doing random acts of kindness, how about we start doing some intentional acts of kindness for those who are closest to us?
YOU KNOW – maybe we need to(seriously and with an open heart) pray what David said in verse 1 of this text:
“Lord, is there anyone in my family, are there any of my friends that I need to show kindness to, for your sake?
Is there anyone I have overlooked?
Is there anyone I just tend to kind of skip over.
MGCC – in order for you to live out God’s kind of love, you must start unleashing kindness on your family and friends…
Get it?
AND – start this very week…
• Write a note, Give a small gift
• Make them some cookies, Take them out to breakfast or lunch, Do something around the house
• Do something for them, rather than always letting them do for you.
Yeah let’s unleash kindness… let’s begin something powerful that will become unrestrained and uncontrollable in the love it will spread.
Here is a second application:
II. Unleash Kindness on someone who cannot return the favor.
UNDERSTAND…
THIS IS - gut-check time, because it is very easy to be selective with our kindness and our goodness. And sometimes the determining factor is whether or not there is something in it for us. SO WE - have to evaluate what our motives are.
QUESTION – what does a cripple guy living in ‘Lo Debar’ (desolate place) have offer a powerful King.
Not much, that is, from an earthly – human point of view.
YOU KNOW – as you read through the Scriptures (as we have talked about before) God has always called and commanded His people to care for and show compassion and kindness to those who are less fortunate.
IN FACT – one of Jesus’ parables (and according to Matthew it was His very last one) was about this very thing.
Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ The King will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me. – Matthew 25:37-40
UNDERSTAND - the world’s economy is so different than God’s economy. I MEAN – the world is always looking for networking opportunities and for people to hang out with who will enhance their popularity, their power and their position (quid pro quo… Latin ;something for something), but that is not how Jesus says we are to do life.
He says, “Sure, it’s fine to be with the movers and shakers, the powerful and the positioned (to be kingdom influencers there), but don’t neglect the others.
REMEMBER - I called you reach out to those who are overlooked and forgotten.”
To those who
• Were dropped when they were young
• Are hiding in a desolate place because of shame
• Have nothing to offer you back
• Most of the world overlooks and discards
‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me. – Matthew 25:40
Kindness is the language that the deaf can hear and the blind can read. – Mark Twain
MGCC – just imagine what is going to happen in you and through you as you UNLEASH kindness on those who cannot return the favor.
OKAY – now here is a third application from 2 Samuel 9.
III. Unless kindness when it may not be deserved.
NOW REMEMBER – Mephib’s family had been extremely harsh to David… I mean, they tried to kill him and fought against him for years. AND LISTEN - Jonathan’s death…
David could’ve said, “Okay, that changes things,” or, “Things are going to be different. I mean, Jonathan’s dead. I don’t need to keep my promise. All bets are off. All promises are void.”
BUT - he wasn’t like that. David was a godly man, therefore, he expressed kindness… even though it may not have been deserved… QUESTION – did you, did I… deserve the kindness of God? Let me answer that… NO!!!!
UNDERSTAND – when we express kindness when it is undeserved, look out because some serious love is fixing to be unleashed. PAUL – wrote this words in Romans 2:20,21…
If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you. – Romans 2:20,21
May be referring to an Egyptian ritual where a guilty person as a sign of repentance carried a basin of burning coals on their head.
Your kindness will be rewarded… and may even win them over…
God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance? – Romans 2:4
NO…
• Mephibosheth may not have deserved David’s kindness but he gave it.
• So and so may deserve your kindness
BUT – the question is will you like David give it.
TODAY - God is calling us to begin unleashing kindness on
1. Our family and friends
2. Those who cannot return the favor
3. Those who may not deserve it
And the final point in your notes… is something that is pretty new in my thinking…
God is calling us to
IV. Unleash Kindness Not Niceness
UNDERSTAND – Jesus never called us to be nice, he called us to be kind… In my studies for this message I came across and read a really good and timely book…
I would highly recommend this book... listen closeness to this quote...
"To be Christian, kindness must shape us and define us. But this powerful virtue seems to be characterizing us less and not more. We have lost an understanding of the power of kindness, mistakenly dismissing it as fluff or flat.
Kindness needs to be rediscovered. Our reflex is to fight those who oppose us. Standing for our dignity and in defense of the truths we hold, we have too often led with meanness toward those antagonistic to the Christian faith. To prove we’re not going soft on our faith, we’re quick to label others from a distance.
I wrote this book out of frustration that those who represent the gospel are often caustic and mean, picking fights with those whose views are hostile to theirs. In other words, Christians are often starting with unkindness.
Unkindness has little effect beyond marshaling other Christians to admire our toughness and raising our own profile. This has gotten us nowhere in the cause of the gospel, our Christian call to be redemptive voices to that which is broken.
Our increasingly shrill sounds in the public square are not strengthening our witness but weakening it. Bullhorns and fist shaking—mustering armies and using war-waging rhetoric—are far less effective than the way of kindness, treating those with whom we disagree with charity and civility.
That doesn’t mean we don’t stand courageously for what we deem right, true, and just. But kindness is not incompatible with courage. Kindness embodies courage, although courage does not always embody kindness.
Too often our centers are firm on conviction, but our edges are also hard in our tactics. This way is characterized by aggression. And on the other hand there is the way of “niceness.”
Whereas aggression has a firm center and hard edges, niceness has soft edges and a spongy center. Niceness may be pleasant, but it lacks conviction. It has no soul. Niceness trims its sails to prevailing cultural winds and wanders aimlessly, standing for nothing and thereby falling for everything.
Kindness is certainly not meanness, but it’s also not niceness. Niceness is cosmetic. It’s bland. Niceness is keeping an employee in the job, knowing he’s no longer the right fit but failing him and the company because you don’t have the courage to do the kind thing. Kindness calls you to tell him he’s not the person for the position and then dignify him in the transition.
Kindness is fierce, never to be mistaken for niceness. They’re not the same and never were. Kindness is neither timid nor frail, as niceness can be so easily. Kindness is all over the Bible, plentiful in both Testaments. But you won’t find niceness there once—or nice, for that matter.
The ideals of kindness are rooted in Scripture, founded on Christian theology, and tested over the millennia by followers of Jesus. Since the early church, disciples have walked the risky and sometimes dangerous road of kindness.
In today’s polarized culture, we are often pulled toward one extreme or the other, soft centers or hard edges. I’m proposing a different approach, a third way. Rather than the meanness of firm centers and hard edges, and rather than the weakness of spongy centers and soft edges, why don’t we start with kindness? Kindness is the way of firm centers and soft edges." – Barry Corey
The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. – John 1:14
MGCC – God is calling us today as His people to…
1. Unleash kindness on our family and friends
2. Unleash kindness on those who cannot return the favor
3. Unleash kindness on those who may not deserve it
4. Unleash kindness not niceness.
NOW - here is my fear as we wrap up this sermon.
My fear is that you’re going to hear this entire story and just make the application that you need to show kindness and goodness just as David did… and that’s true.
BUT - there is another powerful application – in this story that I do not want us to miss….
And that is…
You and I are Mephibosheth in this story.
We brought nothing to the table… we were lame, crippled, handicapped by sin.
AND GOD – in an outlandish act of checed and grace says I want you at my table.
NOT BECAUSE – you look good, or are smart, or make right decisions, but because I love you.
NOW - actually there are two types of Mephibosheth’s in the room today.
REMEMBER – the meaning of the name ‘shameful thing’ and ‘dispeller of shame.’
NOW – I want to first talk to those who are sitting at the King of kings table.
• Remember how you got there
• Remember how you stay there
• Remember what to do while there (celebrate and become a dispeller of grace and loving kindness.
AND – to those who have yet to accept the offer…
(Gospel invite)
