One of the deepest joys that I have ever experienced in all my life is the joy of watching our children turn into adults. I guess I always pretty much figured that would happen some day. But then, there were those times when they were upset with each other over the silliest things and the bickering went on and on. And other times when it seemed impossible to get them out of bed and into the school bus, and I wondered if they would ever be able to hold a job. There were times when they seemed so helpless. Give them the simplest job and it would drag out, on and on and on. As they went through different friendships, we liked most of their friends, but then there were some that really concerned us. And we talked with our kids about that, but there comes a point when they are just going to do what they are going to do. And I’m sure I wondered how this was going to end.
And, they’re not perfect yet. They’re each at different stages of the process, but wonder of wonders, they are all gainfully employed and doing well. They are in very different careers, a teacher, an engineer, an artist and a marketer, but they’re all doing well. When we get together they actually enjoy being together. There are no more fights. They even call each other up and talk, just because they like to. Two are married and they are good husbands and they made good choices of spouses. One now has three children and he’s an excellent father. And after all the times when we had to lower to boom on them, and they were so sure that were the meanest parents in town, they even come home and talk to us. They still like us. They even call us for advice. Who’d a thunk it? They’re growing up. We did our job and it worked. It feels great.
One of the things that I think we had going for us is that we had a pretty clear idea in our minds of how we wanted our children to end up. They didn’t have to be just like us. We wanted them to develop their own unique gifts and interests. But we wanted them to be loyal and loving in relationships, to be honest, to be able to think for themselves, to love and serve God. And so we gave them the experiences that would encourage those things. We tried to model those things. We discouraged the things that didn’t fit our vision for what we wanted them to be.
And if a clear vision of what you are trying to produce is important in parenting. It is also important in building a church. Just what is it that we are trying to accomplish here? Is our goal to be a nice, comfortable place to see our friends? That’s awful nice, but the church must be more than that to be faithful. Is our purpose to relieve stress? Is it to keep an institution alive, to maintain the building that our predecessors left to us? Is it to give something to God, to put in our time, so that we can say ‘now I’m good enough. I did my bit by attending church, so now you have to leave me alone, God’? What are we here for?
Some time ago, after a lot of good thought, we made our mission statement for our church. That’s what the officers said we are here for. Can you say it with me? “The mission of the First United Methodist Church of Oak Lawn is to make disciples of Jesus Christ.”
I think we’re getting it into our heads. But I want to be sure that we have it in our hearts and woven into everything we do together, all our committees, all our programs, all our relationships. “The mission of the First United Methodist Church of Oak Lawn is to make disciples of Jesus Christ.”
Today we move on to a new section of Paul’s letter to the Ephesians. I consider it a wonderful source for learning how churches grow. And in it Paul makes clear what we are here for. Here he doesn’t use the word disciple. He uses the word, ‘maturity’ and the phrase, ‘the full stature of Christ.’ But he means the same thing. And as we enter the year 2006, as we hope to strengthen and build our church, it will be very important that we know just what it is that we are trying to build.
Please stand for the reading of God’s word, Ephesians 4:11-16.
11 The gifts he gave were that some would be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, some pastors and teachers, 12 to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, 13 until all of us come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to maturity, to the measure of the full stature of Christ. 14 We must no longer be children, tossed to and fro and blown about by every wind of doctrine, by people's trickery, by their craftiness in deceitful scheming. 15 But speaking the truth in love, we must grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, 16 from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by every ligament with which it is equipped, as each part is working properly, promotes the body's growth in building itself up in love.
So what does maturity look like? In our passage he sets maturity as the goal, and then says we “must no longer be children, tossed to and fro and blown about by every wind of doctrine…”
You’re not grown up until you are able to stand steady, to be stable. Kid’s get shaken easily. That’s normal for kids. It’s sad in adults. If you find yourself often upset by what others do, reacting angrily against them, or pulling inside yourself, changing course because of what others do rather than living by what God is doing inside of you, then that’s a warning light. There’s still something that needs to grow up here. Mature people are stable.
But Paul has a very specific kind of stability here. It is stability in the face of all the winds of strange doctrines, blowing people off course, that he has in mind. This is a warning for United Methodists. All too often Methodist Sunday School classes float from one religious best seller to another, chasing after every wind of doctrine. We pride ourselves on keeping up with the times. And one of the results of that is that we don’t know who we are. We are torn as a denomination into different theological camps. And when we teach our people that way and then they face a personal crisis in their lives and they try to think theologically about it, all they find is this mishmash of clashing ideas and they have nothing to stand on.
Understanding right doctrine is a lot of work for some of us. But, you cannot be a mature Christian without a solid theological foundation to stand on. You won’t know who you are in Christ, and a mature person knows who they are. You won’t have a clear framework for making decisions. And a mature person has a clear framework for making decisions. You’ll be confused about who you should be, and who your children should be. And a mature person knows what they are working to become.
Every United Methodist should be in a class where they are working to build a solid life foundation through understanding how God’s word applies to their life. That’s for 6 year-olds, 16 year-olds, 26 year-olds, 36 year-olds, 46 year-olds, 56 year-olds, 66 year-olds, 76 year-olds. My mother is 86 and my father is 89 and they still go to Sunday school and church each week. I am so thankful for the example they set for me of being learners, students of God’s word. I wouldn’t be who I am today without their example.
Mature Christians are stable, not knocked off balance, not blown about by trends and pressures. And that happens by understanding God’s word. You don’t have to be a great theologian of philosopher. But you need to have the basic principles down solid. And that will pay off. And so any church that wants to make disciples will offer many opportunities for learning God’s word. And those who are serious about being disciples will take advantage of them. Jesus said, “If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples; 32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free." ”
The whole context of our passage today tells us that part of maturity is to know your spiritual gifts. And we have talked about that a lot already, but the job isn’t done until every one of us can know what we are in this church to do. And the biggest clue to what God wants you to be doing here is to discover your spiritual gifts. I come from a family of engineers. My father was an engineer. My older brother was an engineer. From the time he was about 4 years old, we could see that our son, Luke, had skills to become an engineer. And he’s good at it. He enjoys it. He is making a contribution to society as an engineer. He would be a fish out of water as an English teacher, but he’s a good engineer. We spotted our daughter, Elizabeth, as a teacher from very young. And she’s a really good teacher. Just as they are using their natural gifts, I hope for every one of us to discover the joy of knowing your spiritual gifts and using your gifts to serve God effectively. The basic idea of the Greek word that Paul uses for maturity is to reach your goal or to fulfill who you are. Knowing and using your spiritual gifts is a big part of that. That’s part of growing up in Christ, being mature, being a disciple.
So a mature Christian is stable and a mature Christian knows and uses his or her spiritual gifts.
Certainly the ability to reproduce is part of maturity. I’m not pushing any of our kids to have children, but what a joy it is when they do!
In Jesus’ parable of the sower he describes plants that grow up, but they are so choked by the thorns and weeds around them that they can’t bear fruit. The growth of the gospel in their lives is stunted because God has to compete with a crowd of commitments to less worth things and the work of the Holy Spirit gets squeezed out. Jesus specifies that he is describing people who set out to follow God, but they are so distracted by seeking money and the pleasures of the world that they can’t produce fruit. They don’t build a life that is different from the world enough that anybody would see anything special in them. One of the signs of spiritual maturity is to live a life that invests in others, that shares faith openly and wisely so that their faith is reproduced in others. Mature Christians bear fruit as people can see Christ in their lives and want the same for themselves. But that can’t happen in lives that are cluttered with unworthy and trivial things.
When people look at you, what do they see? Do they see Christ? If not, then you still have work to do.
Mature Christians are stable, they know and use their gifts, and they live a life that spreads the good news of Jesus Christ to others.
Certainly relationship skills are an important part of being mature. Our kids still tease each other, but they’ve learned to do it constructively and endearingly.
When Paul wrote to the Corinthians he told them, sadly, that when he was with them they weren’t even ready for a mature diet of Christian teaching. All they could stomach was the easy stuff. And it was because their relationships were so messed up. We can read about it in 1 Corinthians 3:1-4. 1 “And so, brothers and sisters, I could not speak to you as spiritual people, but rather as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. 2 I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for solid food. Even now you are still not ready, 3 for you are still of the flesh. For as long as there is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not of the flesh, and behaving according to human inclinations? 4 For when one says, "I belong to Paul," and another, "I belong to Apollos," are you not merely human?”
Jealousy and quarreling are signs of immaturity. They are signs that our ability to love has not yet matured. We are driven by fear rather than drawn by love. If you have to avoid people because you can’t get along with them, that is a sign of immaturity. If you are afraid to enter into deep relationships with others, that is a sign of immaturity. And we live in a culture where deep, honest relationships are rare.
Individuals are mature when they learn to get along with people, even in difficult situations. Individuals are mature when they learn to enter into deep, meaningful, honest relationships, able to talk about the things that really matter in their lives. Churches are mature when all the members are pulling together, cooperating, encouraging one another, being open and honest with one another, truly connected with one another. And it is in small groups and classes that church members especially build those connections and relationships that allow them to help one another grow and that help them learn to work together.
If you asked John Wesley, the founder of the Methodist movement what he thought was the most important sign of Christian maturity, he would say the ability to love. I sure can’t argue with that. And he would gather his people into small groups to learn how it works. You can’t build close relationships in a group the size of our congregation today. We are here in this service for worship and teaching. For close relationships, you need to be in a small group. Is there anything in all of life more important than learning God’s love?
The Holy Spirit has great power to heal the wounds deep down inside that get in the way of open and honest relationships.
His word, the Bible, has great wisdom to help us learn to come close to one another and work together. We aren’t mature Christians until that has happened.
For this church to grow we need to have a clear idea of what maturity looks like, what we are trying to produce. And today we have four parts of the answer to that question. Maturity means stability; knowing and using your gifts and strengths, who you are; the ability to reproduce your faith in others; and the ability to enter into close, stable, loving relationships.
Does this describe you? Are you four for four? Are you three for four, two for four, one for four? God loves you as his own child. He wants to see you complete and mature. I invite you today to put your all on the altar, to press in to God until he has made you whole. AMEN
