JAIL BREAK (Breaking the Chains of Unforgiveness) - Cancel the Debt
June 26, 2022
Matthew 18:21-35
Introduction:
Two Christians went before a judge on charges of assault and disturbing the peace.
The judge patiently listened to the evidence from both men, and then he called them… “Men, you’re Christians, you should have settled this out of court.”
One of the men, who had an amazing black eye, said to the judge…“Your honor, we were trying to settle it out of court…but that’s when the cops showed up.”
Forgiveness is easy to talk about…it’s not even that tough to read about it in the Bible. The concept sounds nice, loving and helpful…but when we have to put into practice Biblical concepts in the real world…it’s different!
C.S. Lewis says, “Everyone agrees that forgiveness is a lovely idea…until we have something to forgive.”
I had a friend of mine in school that ended up owing the library about 5 dollars in late fees for books he forgot he had.
He tried to explain he’d left for mid-terms…He had a weekend ministry…He forgot he’d borrowed them for term papers…No dice, they wouldn’t let him off the hook…but he got mad…started fuming about it…so he put 500 pennies in this big jar…filled it with honey and took it to the library…slammed it on the counter and said, “Here! Here’s your stupid late fees.
I give him an “A” for ingenuity…but an “F” in forgiveness.
I’m not sure who first said, “I don’t get mad I get even” but my experience has been most people live more by this rule than the golden one.
Maybe we don’t put honey in penny jars, but we just cuss them out, or quit speaking to them…maybe we just give them the cold shoulder…or build a team against them with gossip… “Do you know what so and so did…NO! Well, let me tell you.” (A part of us hopes it gets back to them eventually so they know how horrible they are.)
HOW MUCH IS ENOUGH TO GET EVEN?
In the early hours of Friday, January 1, 1982 the seventeen year old Kevin Tunell made the biggest mistake of his life. At a New Year’s party near Washington DC, he got very drunk; his friends urged him not to drive but he insisted, “Nothing will ever happen to me.” On the road, he lost control of the wheel, and smashed into another car, instantly killing eighteen year old Susan Herzog. After pleading guilty to involuntary manslaughter and drunk driving, Tunell was sentenced to three years probation and one year of community service.
But Susan’s parents, understandably, didn’t feel that this was sufficient punishment. They sued him in civil court for emotional distress, for $1,500,000.
Then quite unexpectedly, after meeting Kevin, Susan’s parents offered to settle out of court. The terms of the ruling included an amount of $936, one bizarre condition:
The settlement required that Kevin pay the $936 by sending them a check for $1 made out to the deceased Susan Herzog, every Friday for the next eighteen years - one for every year Susan had been alive.
The penalty seemed like he had been let off easy, but soon the burden of guilt proved too much for Kevin to bear. He tried to present the Herzogs with two boxes of pre-written checks, dated each week through 2001, a year longer than required. The couple refused to accept them.
After seven years of the weekly purgatorial ritual, Kevin began to miss a few payments. The Herzogs promptly dragged him back into court. Giving an account before Judge Jack Stevens, a teary Tunell admitted that the agonizing guilt he felt each time he filled in Susan’s name had become unbearable.
“You get to a point where you kind of snap - and you say, it hurts too much…I used to, like, lie in bed, and if I heard…noises, I used to think Susan was going to come to visit me.”
He was sentenced to 30 days in jail, Susan’s dad, Lou said:
“Susan’s death is there every waking moment, but every time we don’t get a check, there’s only one thing that comes to our mind: He doesn’t remember.”
The Herzogs insist that their insistence is not vindictive retribution. Susan’s mother, Patty explained,
“We do want him to remember, but that doesn’t mean we don’t want him to accept it and get on with his life.”
There’s not one word I would say to the Herzogs about understanding what they’ve gone through burying their daughter, killed by a drunk driver.
But, I’d ask you…“Is 936 checks enough?”
How many payments would you demand from the one whose hurt or offended you?
Peter asked Jesus a pretty similar question one time…In fact it’s the question that prompted the parable we’re examining today.
“Peter came to Jesus and asked Him, ‘Lord how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?’”
Peter is being magnanimous…the Jewish law taught 3 times…but Peter doubles the law’s requirement and adds one for good measure.
And then Jesus does Jesus…No Peter…not 7 times..but 77 times.
As Peter stands there…mouth open…the meaning is clear…grace doesn’t keep count…or as 1 Cor. 13 says, “Love keeps no record of wrongs.”
Jesus knew unforgiveness keeps the unforgiver in jail…Its like drinking Drano and hoping it poisons your enemy.
It’s why Jesus tells this story:
I. WE ALL HAVE A MASSIVE DEBT
The servant in our story owes the King 10,000 talents.
A talent weights about 60-80 pounds…it could be either silver or gold…but since Jesus is using an unimaginable debt…let’s say its gold…It’s the equivalent of 60 million working days.
The man’s debt is far greater than his ability to pay…he is ordered to be put in jail, but not just him…His wife and kids go to jail too. Everything was to be sold.
But remember, this parable isn’t about money…it’s about forgiveness.
And Jesus says when the servant begs for forgiveness before the King…He cancels the debt…the Master takes pity on him and clears the ledger.
But I want us to do something…imagine every sin you’ve committed is a talent of debt…not just the “big” sins but every sin…are you at 10,000? 20…50…100 thousand? Every lie, every lust…every hateful word…every unkind judgment…adds up doesn’t it?
A Sunday School teacher asked her class… “What do you have to do to be forgiven?” And a little boy started waving his hand like crazy…shouting “I know…I know.” When the leader called on him he said, “First you have to sin.”
God’s Word tells us that every one of us have accomplished this first requirement.
“All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” (Romans 3:23)
God is the King in this story…and every single one of us are the 1st servant when it comes to being in debt caused by sin.
“Our pockets are empty while our debt is millions. We don’t need a salary; we need a gift! We don’t need swimming lessons; we need a lifeguard! We don’t need a place to work; we need someone to work in our place!”
So God pays our debt…cancels it in His grace at the cross… “He Himself bore our sins in His body on the tree, so that we might die to sin and live for righteousness, by His wounds you have been healed.” (1 Peter 2:24)
“God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.” (2 Cor. 5:21)
“The servants master took pity on him (and her) and let him go.”
Paid in Full…That’s what the blood of Jesus does for the massive debt of the sins of all mankind…Past, present, and future. The wages of sin are death…and Jesus paid our wages!
And yet that transaction releases us from Jail…It allows us to escape Hell…His righteousness becomes our righteousness.
Accepting forgiveness and grace like this must change our hears and lives…or:
II. WE END UP IN A WORSE PRISON THAN BEFORE
The worst Jail a person can find themselves in is an “unforgiving heart.”
Remember, this story from Jesus is about forgiveness…But not just God’s forgiveness of us…but how that affects our forgiveness of others.
MATTHEW 18:28-30
That’s almost unbelievable isn’t it? How can someone who’s just been forgiven millions and millions choke another man because he owes him 10 dollars? Are these the words of someone who’s really been set free?
“PAY ME OR ELSE!”
It would be like you having your mortgage paid off by someone and then you going to Walmart and screaming at the cashier for short changing you a nickel and then getting her fired.
If you come to the cross and understand and accept what God has done for your debt of sin…you can’t leave with the same heart.
This ungrateful servant even has his fellow servant thrown in jail…interesting that it’s the other servants that say…“wait a minute and they go to the Master.”
Unforgiveness blinds us…and it destroys our witness…we want those 936 payments…we want our 10 dollars…we demand that apology.
“Rattlesnakes when cornered can sometimes become so irritated that they bite themselves. That’s exactly what harboring resentment against others is - a biting of oneself.”
And it puts us in a jail where torture and chains bind us until the debt is paid.
Jesus says, “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
No wonder the writer to the Hebrews says, “See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.” (Heb. 12:15)
When we miss the grace of God like that first servant, bitterness is our jail.
Over the next couple months (if Jesus doesn’t return) we’re gonna delve deep into this subject of unforgiveness…and I’ll be honest…I’ve never had a drunk driver kill my daughter, I’ve never been abused, I’ve never gone through a nasty divorce, but I’ve been hurt, injured, mistreated, just like every one of you…its inevitable…and I have hurt, injured and mistreated others…that also is inevitable.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean I continually put myself in circumstances and with people I know will hurt me…on the contrary…but forgiveness does require I choose grace…and want grace for them…including in my prayer life. I have to desire what Jesus wants for them…and stop demanding 936 payments…or the 10 dollars they owe me…or I’ll end up in a bitter jail…and it’s torture of my soul.
[It helps if I remember the 17 year old pothead Jesus saved…It helps if I remember my rebellion and my calling and forgiveness…It helps if I remember the 10,000 talents of debt I owed God…and how it was paid.
I remember working down in New Orleans after Katrina hit…mucking out houses filled with every imaginable filth…my clothes were so dirty and toxic and caked with waste I had to throw them away every evening…and put on new ones…But what if I’d taken that glorious shower…cleaned up and been refreshed and put in the same clothes I’d needed to throw away…not smart huh? Unforgiveness is like that in view of God’s grace.]
