A SMALL CIRCLE OF FRIENDS: PART 1
Text: Col. 4:7-11
Introduction
1. "And Someone died for all your friends but even better yet He lives again.
And if this song does not make sense to you, I hope His Spirit slips on through, He loves you. He loves you, He loves you" (A Song For A Small Circle Of Friends, Larry Norman).
2. Paul concludes this letter to the Colossians, as he does many of his letters, by thanking and praying for his friends.
3. In this conclusion Paul makes reference to 10 friends. In this message we will talk about the first five of them. He talked about...
A. The Friend With The Servants Heart
B. The Friend With The Sinful Past
C. The Friend Who Has Your Back
D. The Friend Who Is Forgiven
E. The Friend With Strong Commitment
4. Let's stand together as we read Col. 4:7-11
Proposition: If we are going to accomplish anything in this life it will take the help of our friends.
Transition: The first friend that Paul talks about is...
I. The Friend With A Servants Heart (7-8).
A. Beloved Brother And Faithful Helper
1. Paul concludes his letter to the Colossians by talking about his friends, and the one at the top of the list is Tychicus.
2. In v. 7, Paul writes, "Tychicus will give you a full report about how I am getting along. He is a beloved brother and faithful helper who serves with me in the Lord’s work."
A. Tychicus means "fortunate." Indeed, he was fortunate to have ministered with Paul for so many years. He is mentioned five times in the New Testament.
B. Although the references are brief, they give us a rich profile of the man.
We first meet Tychicus in Acts 20:4. Paul was in Ephesus near the end of his third missionary journey.
C. He planned to return to Jerusalem via Macedonia, where he intended to collect an offering. With the offerings from Galatia and Achaia, he would present it to the needy believers at Jerusalem.
D. By doing so, he hoped to cement the bond between the predominantly Gentile churches outside of Palestine, and the predominantly Jewish church at Jerusalem.
E. He also planned to take some Gentile believers from Greece and Asia Minor as representatives of their churches to the Jerusalem church. Among them was Tychicus.
F. Tychicus's willingness to travel with Paul to Jerusalem shows his servant's heart. Such a journey was not to be undertaken lightly. Travel in the ancient world was far more difficult and dangerous than in our day.
G. The trip to Jerusalem would be very grueling, and it would take Tychicus away from his family, friends, and church for a long time.
H. Along the way, Paul was repeatedly warned that trouble awaited him in Jerusalem. Although Tychicus must certainly have heard those warnings, he remained with Paul.
I. Helper: is from the Greek word diakonos, and means a servant. Although it refers to a servant in general, in the NT it also refers to a servant to God and His people.
3. In v. 8, Paul talks about Tychicus's purpose in going to the Colossians. Paul says, "I have sent him to you for this very purpose—to let you know how we are doing and to encourage you."
A. Not only will Tychicus deliver the letter of Colossians, he will also bring the Colossians information about Paul's affairs and update them on his circumstances.
B. That would include bringing them information on Paul's health, his hopes, and his future prospects.
C. He would also encourage their hearts by adding a personal word of encouragement to what was written in the letter and answering their queries about Paul's condition.
B. Called To Serve
1. Illustration: You need to answer a very important question this morning. Are you more interested in being served or being a servant? A first grade teacher asked her students, "What do you do to help at home?" One little girl said, "I dry the dishes." One of the boys said, "I sweep the floor." Another one said, "I feed and water the dog." Every student in the class had something to contribute except for one boy sitting in the back. The teacher looked qt him asked, "What do you do to help out at home?" He said, "I stay out of the way." That's a problem in the church. Too many church members just stay out of the way. A Gallup poll discovered that only 10% of church members are active in any kind of personal ministry in their church. 50% said that they have no desire or interest in serving in any ministry.
2. If you want to be like Jesus you have to be a servant and get involved!
A. Mark 10:43-45 (NLT2)
43 But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant,
44 and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of everyone else.
45 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
B. You can't be like Jesus and not be a servant!
C. You can't be like Jesus and sit on your hands!
D. Jesus said he came not to be served but to serve.
E. Not one of us can do it all on their own, and if we are going to make a difference in this neighborhood, this community, this world we have to do it together!
F. If we are going to call ourselves followers of Jesus and then we have to do what Jesus did and be servants!
Transition: The second friend that Paul talks about is...
II. The Friend With A Sinful Past (9).
A. Onesimus
1. One thing that all believers have in common is that we all have a sinful past, including me.
A. Romans 3:23 (NLT2)
23 For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard.
B. Ephesians 2:8-9 (NLT2)
8 God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God.
9 Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.
C. So we are all in the same boat, we all have a sinful past, and we are all only saved by the grace of God.
2. The next person that Paul talks about is someone with a sinful past and his name is Onesimus.
3. In v. 9 Paul says, "I am also sending Onesimus, a faithful and beloved brother, one of your own people. He and Tychicus will tell you everything that’s happening here."
A. Onesimus, the man with the sinful past, is the runaway slave whose return to his master was the occasion for the book of Philemon.
B. Philemon was one of the leaders of the Colossian church, and it is likely that the church met in his home.
C. Onesimus had been a slave in Philemon's household until he ran away and made his way to Rome.
D. There he met the apostle Paul, who led him to Christ. Now he was returning to Colossae and his master.
E. Paul wrote to urge Philemon to forgive Onesimus for running away and defrauding him and to welcome Onesimus as a brother in Christ.
F. Although Onesimus was a runaway slave, Paul describes him as our faithful and beloved brother.
G. When a person comes to faith in Christ, the past is no longer an issue. Onesimus was a testimony to the power of God to transform a life.
H. Paul tells the Colossians that the man who left Colossae as a runaway slave now returns as one of your own people.
I. He was to be treated as a member of the church, because in Christ there was neither slave nor free (Gal. 3:28).
J. Paul shows his regard for him by having him, along with Tychicus, inform the Colossians about Paul's whole situation (MacArthur, 194).
4. When you are in Christ, you are not the same person anymore. You have been transformed by the power of the Holy Spirit.
B. We All Have A Past
1. Illustration: A family from a remote area was making their first visit to a big city. They checked in to a grand hotel and stood in amazement at the impressive sight. Leaving the reception desk they came to the elevator entrance. They'd never seen an elevator before, and just stared at it, unable to figure out what it was for. An old lady hobbled towards the elevator and went inside. The door closed. About a minute later, the door opened and out came a stunningly good-looking young woman. Dad couldn't stop staring. Without turning his head he patted his son's arm and said, "Go get your mother, son."
2. When Jesus comes into our lives we become completely new people!
A. 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NLT2)
17 This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!
B. Once you come to Jesus it doesn't matter who you were before.
C. Once you come to Jesus it doesn't matter what you used to do.
D. Once you come to Jesus it doesn't matter with whom you used to hang out.
E. Once you come to Jesus it doesn't matter where you used to go.
F. All that matters is that Jesus has changed who you were, what you did, where you went or with whom you went there.
G. Your past is your past, but Jesus is your future.
Transition: The next friend is...
III. The Friend Who Has Your Back (10a).
A. Aristarchus
1. "There are two kinds of people in the world, Greeks and everyone who wish they was Greek!" Sorry that just kind of slipped out.
2. Seriously, there are two kinds of friends, those who tell you they have your back, and those who show you they have your back.
3. Aristarchus is the kind of friend who shows it by his actions. In the first part of v. 10, Paul writes, "Aristarchus, who is in prison with me, sends you his greetings..."
A. Aristarchus was a Jewish believer who had a Greek name. He was a native of Thessalonica. Aristarchus first appeared during Paul's three-year ministry at Ephesus.
B. He was seized by the rioting mob, who recognized him as one of Paul's companions (Acts 19:29). He accompanied Paul on his return trip to Jerusalem (Acts 20:4), and on his voyage to Rome (Acts 27:4).
C. It is possible he stayed with Paul throughout his imprisonment in Palestine as well. As Paul writes Colossians, Aristarchus is still beside the apostle.
D. In Prison with me is from a Greek word, which literally means, "one caught with a spear." It refers to war captives, or prisoners.
E. Paul refers to him as such because he shared Paul's prison existence. In fact, some commentators say he did so voluntarily, perhaps passing as his servant (Bruce, 178-179).
F. That he chose to make Paul's lifestyle his own speaks of his sympathetic, caring heart.
G. He gave up his own freedom to minister to Paul's needs. Any leader would be enriched to have a faithful Aristarchus at his side through all his trials.
H. The Lord's work would not be done if it were not for people like Aristarchus, who humbly bear hardships without the fame of those they serve (MacArthur, 194).
B. Sticks Closer Than A Brother
1. Illustration: There is a phrase of a poem that says: "A true friend is he who listens to your deepest sorrows. A true friend is like toothpaste, when it is put under pressure, it appears!"
2. A true friend is one that is there in your darkest hours!
A. Proverbs 18:24 (NLT2)
24 There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.
B. Friends are there when you have nowhere else to turn.
C. Friends are there when you have a death in the family.
D. Friends are there when you need someone to pick you up.
E. Friends are there at 3:00 a.m.
F. Friends have your back when the world is in your face.
G. What kind of friend are you?
Transition: The next kind of friend is...
IV. The Friend Who Is Forgiven (10b).
A. Mark
1. Now this next guy's name shouldn’t be to hard for us to pronounce. I mean it's not like his last name is Schaeufele!
2. The rest of v. 10 says, "...A and so does Mark, Barnabas’s cousin. As you were instructed before, make Mark welcome if he comes your way."
A. Mark had a very different career in the ministry than either Tychicus or Aristarchus.
B. A companion of Paul and Barnabas on their first missionary journey, he deserted them when the going got tough.
C. Acts 13:13 relates the story: "Paul and his companions put out to sea from Paphos and came to Perga in Pamphylia; and Mark left them and returned to Jerusalem."
D. Mark's desertion was later to become a source of friction between Paul and Barnabas. Barnabas wanted to take his cousin along on the second missionary journey, but Paul, not trusting Mark to be loyal, refused.
E. That led to such a sharp disagreement between Paul and Barnabas that they separated from each other.
F. Fortunately, the story does not end there. By the time Paul wrote Colossians, Mark had become a changed man. He had been restored to usefulness, probably through the ministry of Peter (himself no stranger to failure) in his life.
G. In Philemon 24, Paul names him among his fellow workers. The man whom Paul once rejected became one of his greatest helpers.
H. In 2 Timothy 4:11, Paul tells Timothy to "pick up Mark and bring him with you, for he is useful to me for service."
I. Paul told the Colossians that if Mark came to them, they were to obey their instructions (which may have come from Paul, Peter, or Barnabas) and welcome him. They were not to shun him because of his previous failure.
J. We might also call Mark the man with a second chance. His life was a testimony to God's ability to use failures.
K. In fact, he later received a privilege shared by only three other men in history: writing one of the gospels (MacArthur, 195).
B. Forgive And You Will Be Forgiven
1. Illustration: "He that cannot forgive others, breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass if he would ever reach heaven; for every one has need to be forgiven."
2. If we want to be forgiven we need to be willing to forgive.
A. Luke 6:37 (NLT2)
37 “Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven.
B. We cannot realistically expect God to forgive us of the many things when we are not willing to forgive others of the little things.
C. If we want to be forgiven we need to forgive.
D. We need to forgive when others hurt our feelings.
E. We need to forgive others when they lie to us.
F. We need to forgive others when they let us down.
G. We need to forgive others of things in the past, and let those things stay in the past.
H. If we don't then we will not be forgiven either!
Transition: The fifth friend is...
V. The Friend With Strong Commitment (11).
A. Only Jewish Believers
1. The last of the friends that we will look at today are the ones with strong commitment.
2. In v. 11, Paul writes, "Jesus (the one we call Justus) also sends his greetings. These are the only Jewish believers among my co-workers; they are working with me here for the Kingdom of God. And what a comfort they have been!"
A. Nothing is known of Jesus who is called Justus apart from this verse. It is possible that he was one of the Roman Jews who believed Paul's message (Acts 28:24).
B. Jesus is the Greek form of Joshua, which means "savior." That certainly was a difficult name to live up to, but his Latin surname, Justus ("righteous"), indicates that he in some measure did.
C. Jesus Justus, Mark, and Aristarchus were Paul's only fellow workers for the kingdom of God who were Jewish.
D. The lack of response from his fellow Jews must have grieved Paul's heart. The Jewish leaders in Jerusalem rejected his message, plotted to kill him, and denounced him to the Roman authorities.
E. Much of the opposition he received on his missionary journeys was from his fellow countrymen.
F. Even those who believed his message apparently did not commit themselves to him. (Many Gentiles who appeared to receive his message soon deserted him, according to 2 Tim. 1:15.)
G. Only these three proved to be an encouragement to him. Parēgoria (comfort) appears only here in the New Testament. It could also be translated "comfort."
H. Jesus Justus, along with Aristarchus and Mark, was a source of comfort and encouragement to Paul.
I. That Jesus Justus was willing to leave his people to identify with Paul demonstrates his strong commitment.
J. He was willing to take a stand alongside Paul for Jesus Christ no matter what the cost (MacArthur, 196).
B. Committed
1. Illustration: When the explorer, Cortez, landed in Mexico with his 500 men, he did a wise thing; he burned the ships. His men realized that they must be committed to staying and to succeeding here because there was no turning back. Whether it is our commitment to Christ, or our commitment to one another, we need to have the same kind of mind set. There's no turning back!
2. We need to be committed, in both our faith and our relationships, regardless of the consequences or the cost.
A. Genesis 31:44 (NLT2)
44 So come, let’s make a covenant, you and I, and it will be a witness to our commitment.”
B. God's love to us is a covenant love. He loves not because we deserve it, but rather because He said he would.
C. This comes from the Hebrew word khesed, which refers to an unconditional, highly favorable disposition to an object.
D. This is the kind of love with which we should treat one another.
E. This means I love you regardless of what you do.
F. This means I care for you regardless of how you have treated me.
G. This means I am committed to you as a brother/sister or friend, not because you deserve it, but rather because I said I would love you!
Conclusion
1. He talked about...
A. The Friend With The Servants Heart
B. The Friend With The Sinful Past
C. The Friend Who Has Your Back
D. The Friend Who Is Forgiven
E. The Friend With Strong Commitment
2. FIVE THINGS TO REMEMBER...
A. IT'S BETTER TO SERVE THAN TO BE SERVED.
B. WE'VE ALL DONE THINGS WE'RE NOT PROUD, SO DON'T HOLD OTHERS MISTAKES AGAINST THEM.
C. BE THE KIND OF FRIEND THAT ALWAYS HAS THE OTHER'S BACK, EVEN IN THE GRIMMEST OF CIRCUMSTANCES.
D. IF YOU WANT TO BE FORGIVEN THEN BE A FORGIVER.
E. LOVE OTHERS, ESPECIALLY IN THE CHURCH, BECAUSE YOU SAID YOU WOULD.
