In this series, we’ve defined repentance as a change of mind that results in a change of heart that results in a change of action. Last time, we said that false repentance is the result of worldly sorrow. We said that worldly sorrow focuses on self, not God; and on sin’s consequences, rather than sin’s failure. Today, we’ll conclude by considering the characteristics of real repentance. (READ TEXT)
We shouldn’t be surprised that just like worldly sorrow results in false repentance, godly sorrow results in real repentance. Unlike worldly sorrow, the focus of godly sorrow is on God, not oneself; and on the failure of sin as opposed to sin’s consequences. Godly sorrow produces real repentance, which is characterized by seven things.
1. We see our sin for what it is - “earnestness”
Real repentance sees sin for what it is - an offense to a holy God. My sin sent Jesus to the cross where He paid my penalty so I wouldn’t have to. So, every sin I commit is a sin for which Jesus died. And when I sin, even though Christ’s sacrifice has covered my sin debt, so I can have a relationship with God, my sin grieves God and disrupts my fellowship with Him; and prevents His Spirit from being able to work in my life.
“And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.” - Ephesians 4:20 (NIV)
It’s seeing sin for what it is; not a mistake, or a failure, or an error, but an offense to a holy God that brings about repentance that causes a change of mind that results in a change of heart that results in a change of action. It moves our awareness of sin and the need to turn to the Savior from the head to the heart, and eventually to our hands.
“A man must first recognize and consider what his sin is, and know the plague of his heart before he can be duly humbled for it. The eye is made both for seeing and weeping. Sin must first be seen before it can be wept for.” - Thomas Watson, Puritan Preacher
2. We confess our sin as what it is - “eagerness to clear yourselves”
We say the same thing God says about our sin, in other words, we confess our sin to Him (homologeo).
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” - 1 John 1:9 (NIV)
Real repentance does not color code sin, excuse sin, or justify sin.
I remember the advice given by David and Teresa Ferguson in their book, “Intimate Encounters.” They said we shouldn’t say, “I’m sorry” when making apology to a person we have hurt, but rather we should say, “I was wrong. Please forgive me.” Because we can be sorry for all sorts of reasons like, “I’m sorry I got caught; or I’m sorry you have a hang-up with my words or behavior; or I’m sorry I’ve got to take the time to fool with apologizing with you, there, can we move forward now?”
But by saying, “I was wrong. Please forgive me,” we communicate that we are looking at our behavior through God’s eyes, admitting how wrong we were, and how in need of forgiveness we are.
That’s how we confess our sins to God when we’re really repentant. We come clean with God and with others we have hurt by our sin.
A. Since all sin hurts God, we must ask His forgiveness.
B. If my sin has hurt another person, I must ask their forgiveness.
C. If my sin has hurt a group, I must ask the group’s forgiveness.
A person who is truly repentant, is willing to go as far as necessary to clear themselves and come clean with God and others.
3. We look at our sin as God does - “indignation”
The dictionary defines “indignation” as “anger or annoyance provoked by what is perceived as unfair treatment.”
God is indignant about sin, because it results in Him not being treated fairly. He is creator, but because of sin, creation doesn’t acknowledge Him. Sin brings separation, and the fact God is indignant means He hates being separated from us. The Bible presents God’s attitude toward sin with strong feelings of hostility and disgust. Sin is described as putrefying sores (Isaiah 1:6, NKJV), a heavy burden (Psalm 38:4), defiling filth (Titus 1:15; 2 Corinthians 7:1), a binding debt (Matthew 6:12-15), darkness (1 John 1:6) and a scarlet stain (Isaiah 1:18).
Now, when we really repents, we look at our sin as God does. We’re indignant about sin because it causes separation between us and God. We hate being separated from God just as He hates being separated from us. We recognize there is but one provision for the problem of sin and one solution for the separation it causes - a full confession and turning from our sin and full surrender and turning to our Savior.
“If we go to a psychiatrist or a therapist, we’ll become well-adjusted sinners. If we go to a doctor or a health spa, we’ll become healthy sinners. If we achieve wealth, we’ll be wealthy sinners. If we join a church and decide to turn over a new leaf, we’ll become religious sinners. But let us go in earnest repentance and faith to the foot of Calvary’s cross, and we’ll be forgiven sinners, for we will find that the cross of Jesus Christ is the only bridge that can reach God.” - Skip Heitzig
4. We acknowledge our sin for what it does - “alarm”
Why do we have fire alarms in our homes? Because we recognize if a fire isn’t caught early and put out, it will cause great destruction.
Likewise, when one really repents, they do so because they understand the destructive nature of sin and want to halt it before it causes further damage. The presence of sin in their life and prospect of it growing and spreading it’s damage through-out their life scares them to death. This alarm is reflected in what James tells us:
“So let God work his will in you. Yell a loud no to the Devil and watch him scamper. Say a quiet yes to God and he’ll be there in no time. Quit dabbling in sin. Purify your inner life. Quit playing the field. Hit bottom, and cry your eyes out. The fun and games are over. Get serious, really serious. Get down on your knees before the Master; it’s the only way you’ll get on your feet.” - James 4:7-10 (The Message)
5. We desire to be free of our sin - “longing”
Real repentance desires not only to be forgiven of sin, but to be free from sin. The attitude, “I’ll confess my sin today so I sin again tomorrow,” isn’t the attitude of one who really repents. They confess their sin today because they long to be free of that sin tomorrow.
Real repentance is turning to Christ for forgiveness & instruction. One who is truly repentant wants to learn how to avoid that sin in the future and since real repentance is a change of mind that results in a change of heart that results in a change of action, they’ll seek to avoid the circumstances, the friends, the habits, whatever it was, that led them into that sin, so they will not commit it again.
6. We want to learn from our sin - “concern”
One who really repents not only wants to learn how to avoid sin in the future, but they want to learn from their mistakes.
“God uses sin sinlessly.” - Puritan Saying
God can use every hurt, every difficulty, every problem, and even our sinful failures to teach truths that will transform our lives and then use us to encourage others with what we have learned from our suffering. Whether the trouble we have to go through is due to the fallen nature of this world, the fallen nature of others, or our own fallen nature, God can redeem it and use it and the lessons we learn from it for His glory, even if it is trouble we have brought on ourselves by our sinful choices. His promise remains true:
“He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.” - 2 Corinthians 1:4 (NLT)
7. We accept the consequences of our sin - “readiness to see justice done”
One who really repents is willing to accept the consequences for their action. If it disqualifies them from leadership, they step down, if it means they are guilty of a crime, they are willing to do their time.
“Forgiveness is relational. The Father sent Jesus to make a sacrifice on our behalf, and by so doing reconciled us to Himself. By His mercy alone, we can have communion with the Lord. On the other hand, consequences are circumstantial. The man who drank for many years and developed cirrhosis of the liver knows that his disease has a direct link to his alcohol abuse. The woman who had an affair realizes, deep in her heart, that her ruined marriage was a direct consequence of her sinful choice. The promiscuous person knows his sexually transmitted disease is a result of an immoral lifestyle. God does not often remove consequences like these simply because
someone trusts Christ as Savior or confesses sin.” - Charles Stanley
Those who really repent will receive forgiveness and can move on from there to live life anew, even though they may still have to suffer the consequences of past sinful choices. Some of the most vibrant believers I know are living today with consequences like a disease, or a failed marriage, or even prison time. How? Because they’ve really repented.
No one can go back and make a brand new start, but by the power of God, the provision of the cross, and the practice of repentance, we can start where we are and make a brand new end.
