“The Secret of Happiness”
April 18, 2018 -Andy Grossman
Someone said one time that everyone is about as happy as they want to be. I don’t know who said it or where I heard it – but I never forgot those words, “You are as happy as you want to be.” My reaction was probably about like yours- “BALONY! I want to be happier than I am right now!”
So many of us are disillusioned and unhappy and depressed. “Gloom, despair and agony on me!” the Hee Haw gang sang. And we drink ourselves to sleep or medicate ourselves to sleep so we can wake up and do it all over again the next day. I remember a time in my life, shortly after coming home from the military, that I literally had to drink myself to sleep every night. I was burning with anger in my life and I couldn’t sleep until I drank a couple of Colt .45’s (a strong beer) before I went to sleep or passed out. Thankfully I exchanged that beer for a Bible before long. But many people live like that. They need alcohol or marijuana or pills or sleep aids or prescription drugs of one kind of another just to sleep. Then they start all over again the next day. It is an endless cycle.
We are all in a mad search for happiness, aren’t we? Some of you just got back from vacationing in Hawaii or Disneyland or the Caymans or someplace that you thought would make you happy. But it didn’t – or it didn’t last. You had to go back home.
You go fishing or golfing or watch TV or go to the movies to find something to lift your spirits. Some think the secret is in wealth and if they just had enough money they would be happy – but the lives of the rich deny that theory. They are some of the most unhappy people in the world. You can’t buy happiness.
The world is in a crazy search for happiness. They think it may be in marijuana or meth or heroin. It isn’t. Those things only cause more pain. Some people turn to sex in their quest for happiness. Pornography is a huge industry. Happiness isn’t there, so some try deviant sexual experiences. They think homosexuality might be the way since the opposite sex didn’t do it for them. Others are led to violence - and rape and assaults are increasing. We hear about people capturing young girls or boys and making them sex slaves. Some of these victims have escaped after years in captivity and tell terrible tales of misery.
All these things are symptoms of a problem - The problem of unhappiness. To what lengths would you go to find happiness? What would you do if I told you I have a pill or a drink or could tell you about something you could do that would make you truly happy for the rest of your life? How much would you pay for it? What would you give for it? How much would you sacrifice for it? If I knew that secret – I could get very rich. I could have anything I wanted. I could make people do anything I asked them to. And some are peddling that lie.
Paul wrote, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Philippians 4:12
Paul said he knew what it was to be in need. He knew what it was to be in want. He also said he know what it was to live in abundance – in plenty. And he learned a secret. He learned the secret of being content. Isn’t that another word for happiness? When I am content – I am happy. Paul learned the secret of happiness in any and every situation. So does he go on and tell us the secret? No! I would have liked an item by item list of stuff that I could do – but no! It isn’t there. We have to dig for it! We have to work at it. Paul hid those great truths in the things he wrote and we have to discover them ourselves.
“We all have about as much happiness as we choose.” Here is where we lose a whole lot of people. They don’t want to work at it. It is easier to wallow in misery and pain than it is to search for the solution. It is kind of like someone trying to sleep but they are too tired to get up and turn the light off. We cry, “I can’t do it!” So the next thing Paul writes is, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)
We don’t have to be on our own. We don’t have the strength on our own. But we don’t have to. Jesus will give us the strength we need. We just have to put forth a little effort. He won’t do it for us – He gives US the strength. So the first thing we have to do is, in faith, do something. So what do you do? You won’t find it on your own - so you need Jesus. Your way won’t work. Only He can lead you to happiness. You have to commit 100 percent to following Him. If you aren’t willing to do that you will have about as much happiness as you want to – or work for – and isn’t much. If you are committed 100 percent to finding that elusive happiness– here’s the first secret.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7
If you are willing to follow His lead and receive His strength and wisdom on the quest then you need to start but stopping – and thanking God. Can anyone be truly happy and be a thankless ingrate? I don’t think so. I have seen dirt poor happy people who couldn’t rub two coins together. But they were happy and thankful. They were thankful for family and God and salvation and the weather and a roof over their heads – and on and on. On the other hand, I have seen people who lived in the top one percent of the world and were miserable. That had more money and things than you or I will ever have – but were miserable and stressed. Why? They wanted more. The world’s richest man at the time was asked how much money was enough. He replied, “Just a little more.” See, there is never enough with that mindset. There is no contentment.
If you want to experience contentment and joy in life you must start by thanking God for what you have – not begging him for what you don’t have. Oh, you can present you requests and desires to God later – but start by thanking Him for the blessings you are now experiencing.
Second, present your requests to God. He knows about them anyway – but there is something about verbalizing them. Sometimes it may make us realize we don’t really need that thing we long for or it may make us realize we do and need God’s help for the fulfillment of our desire. I think that it helps to present our request to God so He can take the burden off our shoulders. Peter wrote, “Cast all your cares on Him (Jesus), because He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7) He cares for you! Think about that! That is mind blowing. To think Almighty God, creator of the universe, cares about me and my little problems – it overwhelms me sometimes. There are so many awful things going on; people dying of diseases; Christians being killed for their faith; world shaking events – yet God cares about me and you and our problems. It doesn’t matter if it is lost keys or unpaid bills – God cares! Why? Because He cares for you.
Feel free to present your request to God. A loving father doesn’t begrudge his child their asking for anything. I’ve been asked by my kids and grandkids when they were young if they could have my car or guns or one thing or another when I died. I said, “Sure!” It was sweet to me. Your request matters to God because you matter to Him.
Thirdly, be content with what you have and where you are. That doesn’t mean you accept poverty or illness or anything else. It doesn’t mean you stop striving and working to become better or make things better for your family. Some people think being content means to kill all ambition and furthering your education and so on – just accept your lot in life. I don’t think it means that. When we are not content it does something to our spirit. It makes us bitter and angry and unhappy. We can be content and at peace with where God has us at a certain period of time and yet continue to aim high for a goal and work hard to achieve it.
Real contentment is found only in the center of God’s will. Joseph was content and at peace even in prison. It was better in the palace where God eventually took him but he was at peace even before. The Children of Israel were content in the fiery furnace and Daniel was content in the lion’s den. They didn’t want to remain there but as long as they were in God’s will they were content. They were happy.
And that is the secret to happiness. That is the secret to being content. It is found in the center of God’s will. So often we get ahead of God or lag behind and experience frustration and anxiety and a whole host of bad things. I want to encourage you to seek God first. In Jesus’ very first sermon, the Sermon on the Mount, He said, “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things (our hearts desires) will be given to you as well.” (Matthew 6:33)
Happiness and contentment are a by-product of right priorities. It is a result of putting God first. Figure out how to do that in your life – and you will find happiness.
