Alliance Church
Pastor David Welch
“Learning to Love”
"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another.” "By this(mutual love) all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13:31-35
Long-tempered Short-tempered
Kind Apathetic or cruel
Supportive of others Jealous of others
Determined to build up others Determined to build up self
Tolerant of the actions of others Provoked by the actions of others
Talks about the qualities of others Talks about their own qualities
Acts thoughtfully Acts shamefully
Seeks to satisfy others Seeks to satisfy self
Forgives and overlooks other’s offenses Tracks other’s offenses
Rejoices in truth Rejoices in evil
Protects all Reveals all
Believes all Questions all
Hopes for the best Expects the worst
Endures difficulty Evades difficulty
Always lasts and never fails Quits
According to Romans 12 unhypocritical love demonstrates itself by…
Abhorring whatever is evil
Clinging to whatever is good
Loving one another warmly as your own family
Preferring one another in honor
Not being slothful or lazy
Being fervent in spirit as if serving the Lord
Rejoicing in hope
Persevering in tribulation
Devoting ourselves to prayer
Contributing to the needs of the saints
Practicing hospitality
Unhypocritical love…
Blesses & doesn’t curse those who persecute you
Rejoices with those who rejoice
Weeps with those who weep
Thinks properly toward one another
• Thinking the same toward one another avoiding favoritism.
• Not thinking too high but thinking that includes the lowly as vital to the whole.
• Not thinking I have all the answers but listening to others opinions
Responds properly to evil
• Never pays back evil for evil to anyone
• Does not be overcome by evil with good.
• Respects others
• Meets the basic needs even of one’s enemies
• Lets God handle the revenge business
• Lives in peace with all men as far as possible.
Submits to earthly authorities
Owes nothing but to love
Loves our neighbors as ourselves
Responds properly to the weaker brother
• Accepts
• Does not judge
• Bears their weakness
Seeks to build up one another
Accepts others as Christ accepted us
General thoughts about love
• God considers belief in Jesus and love for one another priority commands 1Jn 3:21-24
Faith and love! Paul persistently praised the church for their faith in Christ and love for one another. These are the essential elements of a pleasing walk.
• Love always seeks to build other up. 1 Cor 8:1
Whereas knowledge makes one arrogant and self-centered, love seeks to build others up.
• Love seeks to raise others to higher levels of life Eph 2:4-7
It was God’s love that motivated Him to raise us from a state of death and alienation in order to seat us with Christ in the heavenlies. Love is the opposite of competition that tries to be better than others. Love seeks to bring others to an equal level and works to raise them up.
• Love treats others well Rom 13:10
• Love is an eternal debt that sums up the intent of the whole law and is the great commandment. Rom 13:8-10; Gal 5:14; Matt 5:43-47;James 2:8-13
There are so many passages that decree love as the fulfillment and embodiment of God’s law. If you love, you fulfill the law. The Law is an expression of God’s character who is love.
• Love includes emotion Mark 10:21 “Jesus felt a love for the rich man.
Lest we give the impression that this kind of love is soley a n act of the will a decision without emotion. Although this love is primarily a decision of the will it is not without feeling. Jesus felt a love for the rich man.
• Love is the overcoat of character for the Christian “beyond all these things put on love” Col 3
In a comprehensive list of virtues or character to put on or wear Paul concludes with the overcoat of love. “Beyond all these things (like a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you) put on love! Notice there is a sense of personal responsibility implied here. Just as we are to put off the things that drive us apart, we are to put on the things that draw us together.
• Love is to be the guiding factor of our everyday walk Eph 5:1-2 “walk in love.”
• Everything we do is to be done because of our love for God and others.
• Love’s sacrificial nature motivates us to minister to others. 2 Cor 5:14-16
Paul said it was the love of Christ that controlled him, motivated him to minister to others.
• Love is the perfect bonding agent Col 3:14
When two people seek the best for the other, there is no greater glue, there is not greater basis of peace to be found.
• Love functions as a protection 1 Thes 5:12-13
Paul talks in this passage of love as a breastplate to protect the heart. We are tempted to think that practicing love causes vulnerability not protection. In reality, a genuine love for others protects us from bitterness that destroys. To fail to love is to become subject to the ravages of broken relationships and bitterness.
• Love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith ought to be the goal of all of our teaching 1 Tim 1:5
When we teach or even talk to others, it should be our goal to inspire and motivate love in others from a pure heart (selfless motives) a good conscience (sinless actions) and a sincere faith (straightforward trust in God).
• You don’t always need a physical presence to demonstrate love 1 peter 1:8-9 “Though you have not seen Him
you love Him.”
We sometimes think that if we could just see Jesus we would love him better.
Peter commended his readers for their love for Jesus even thought they had not seen Him.
It was a love based on faith in his word to them and the hope for a future connection.
• Genuine love includes discipline for wrong behavior for the purpose of training in righteous living and a holy walk. Hebrews 12
Lest we think that love just overlooks everything and never responds to evil, the writer of Hebrews balances our understanding by explaining that love disciplines when necessary. Like a loving Father, God disciplines his sons that they may walk after Him in holiness.
• Growth comes from speaking the truth in love and the building up by love Eph 4:14-16
This is a powerful byproduct of proper love in the church body. The body of Christ experience growth when members speak the truth out of a fervent love for not only the truth but also one another. As each member lovingly employs his particular gift the body builds itself in love.
• God does not forget loving ministry Philemon 1:4-7
Paul reminded Philemon that God would not overlook his loving deeds practiced faithfully. God rewards loving ministry to one another.
• It is good to report on examples of faith and love 1 Thes 3:6
Timothy brought back news of the Thessalonian’s love and faith and concern. Testimonies of love in action stimulate us to love one another all the more.
• Lawlessness in the land cools love in the land Mat 24:9-14
Jesus relates how lawlessness in the land in the last days will cause people’s love to grow cold.
• Fleshly love is perishable we are called to love with incorruptible love. Eph 6:24
Paul refers to a perishable love and encourages a love that is imperishable.
• Unbelievers do not have the love of God in them John 5:38-42
Jesus makes it clear that those who do not trust God do not love like God. They do not have the love of God in them. It think that can be understood both ways. They have neither a love for God nor the love of God because they do not have God.
Who are we to love in this way?
Love god with all your heart, soul, mind and strength
Love your spouse and family
Love your neighbor
Love all men
Love those who have sinned
Love your enemies
Love by meeting their basic need, praying for them, lending without expectation doing good, treating them the way you want to be treated.
What demonstrates genuine love?
• Obedience to God demonstrates love for God John 14; 1 John 5:3; 1 john 2:3-6; 2 Jon 1:6
This is fearfully elementary. If we really love someone we will naturally respond to his or her likes and dislikes. We will avoid whatever might offend them and advocate the things that please them. It becomes nearly impossible to weasel around this principle. This is a glaring measuring stick of our love for God. To say we love God while ignoring his expressed likes and dislikes his is self-deception. That’s putting it kindly. The Bible says we are liars.
On the other hand…
• You can’t love the world and God at the same time 1 John 2:15
This is the flip side of obedience. You can’t love the things that are contrary to the heart and character of God and love him at the same time. You may feel something for God but don’t call it love. Call it convenience, hope, fear, carefulness, but not genuine love.
• Caring for God’s sheep demonstrates love for God Jn 21
Jesus interrogates Peter concerning the depth of his love just before ascending into heaven.
In this loving interchange, Jesus clearly communicates one measure of genuine love for Him. If you love Him, you will take care of His sheep. Most importantly tend and feed.
• Self Sacrifice demonstrates love John 3:16 and 1 John 3:16
There are two 3:13 passages that clearly indicate the sacrificial aspect of love. The highest expression of love is self-sacrifice. No greater love than someone lay down his life for his friends.
• Love for the children of God demonstrates love for God
You can’t claim to love God and reject the children of God. There is no way around it, if you love me, you must love my children, for they are extensions of me. To reject them is to reject me, for they are part of me. What seems so obvious in the natural realm becomes fuzzy in the spiritual realm. But there is no difference. We really don’t love God if we actively reject and resist those whom God continually loves and accepts.
• Love grows and increases 1 Thes 4:9-12; Phil 1:8-11; 1 Thes 3:11-13; 2 Thes 1:3-4; Jude 1:2
A number of Bible verse indicate that love grows and increases. Paul observes it in others. Paul prays that it might happen. Since this is true, learning to demonstrate love is a lifetime pursuit. We never arrive at the ultimate demonstration of love for others. It is possible to continually grow in our love for one another.
• God calls for a sincere fervent love from the heart 1 Pet 1:22-23
From this passage it appears that love is a heart thing more than anything else. Not only a sincere love but also a fervent one. Peter connected two Greek words here.
“ek” = out of “teino” = to stretch
Thus he calls for a stretched out love, and extended love, a fervent love that operates out of a heart that is after God’s heart of love.
• Hate for people blocks love for God 1 Jn 3:10-18; 4:20-21
To proclaim a love for God and practice hate of people exposes hypocrisy and a lie.
It doesn’t get much clearer. Love for God is primarily demonstrated by a desire to obey God and love the children of God.
• Deeds demonstrate love 1 John 3:18
John calls us not to love only in words but in actions that meet the needs of others.
• Love avoids hurting others by a willingness to surrender personal rights Rom 14:13-19
Paul calls us to consider how our actions might affect our brother. Love adjusts behavior so as to build up not destroy a brother.
• Forgiveness demonstrates love 2 Cor 2:4-11; Eph 4:1-3
Since the core of love pursues connection with others, forgiveness demonstrates that desire more clearly than any other thing. I am willing to forbear the personal cost in order to establish or reconcile a relationship. That is genuine love. To love those who never offend us is easy. Even the unbelievers do that.
• Love enables us to view others from Christ’s perspective 2 Cor 5:16
Paul confessed that the love of Christ “griped” him so that he no longer views people from a fleshly perspective but from an eternal one.
• God frees us that we might serve one another in love not ourselves Gal 5:13
Do you have the picture? God’s genuine love is a most powerful attribute. It is that kind of love that changes the world. It is that kind of love that demonstrates what God intended life to be all about. This kind of love seems nearly impossible to live in a fallen, selfish, angry, and hate filled world. The burning question is how do I love like that? How does one learn to love like God loves?
What is the source of divine love?
God’s part
• God is love 1 John 4:8
We began with this simple definition of love. God is love.
God always loves. Everything he does is motivated by love. Wherever you see love, you see God. Wherever you see God, you see love.
• God loved us first 1 John 4:10, 19
In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation (satisfactory payment) for our sins. 19 We love, because He first loved us.
God’s love motivates and is the basis of our capacity to love.
• Love is from God 1 John 4:7; Eph 6:23
Because we were created in the image of God who is love, love is at the core of human experience. Even the secular “experts” admit that the core longing of man is to love and be loved. The fall twisted that desire to love and serve others into self-love. Only through a supernatural transformation can that diminished capacity to love God and others be restored. Love is because of God. Love is from God.
• God pours his love in our hearts by the Holy Spirit Rom 5:1-8
At the moment of salvation, God filled our empty love reservoir with his undiminished love. We have all the resources necessary to love people. The problem lies in our understanding and outflow of His love. We make the choice to share His love or block it. When we live by the power of the Holy Spirit, we love.
• Love is the work of the Holy Spirit in our life Gal 5:22-24
• God gives a spirit of love 2 Tim 1:7
• God causes our growth in love 1 Thes 3:11-13
• God teaches to love 1 Thes 4:9-12
Just how God teaches us is not specifically taught. He is active in our learning process. Even though His love indwells us, there is also a learning process.
• Love is found in Christ 1 Tim 1:13-14; 2 Tim 1:13
Love is the essential character of the Trinity. Love is found in God because God is love. Love is found in the Holy Spirit because the Holy Spirit is love. Love is found in Jesus because Jesus is love.
So what is our part in this love thing?
Man’s part
• Obedience purifies the heart to initially love sincerely 1 Pet 1:22
Since you have in obedience to the truth purified your souls for a sincere love of the brethren, fervently love one another from the heart, for you have been born again not of seed which is perishable but imperishable, that is, through the living and abiding word of God. 1 Peter 1:22-23
When we respond to the truth of the word of God there is a new birth. The old heart, no longer capable of loving God or others, is purified and renewed with a capacity to love. Peter urges us to develop this new capacity to its fullest extent and fervently love one another not from obligation or forced action but from the heart.
• Obedience also perfects love 1 Jn 2:3-6
John indicates here that obedience to the truth not only restores the capacity to love but develops it as well.
• Love is something we choose to wear or put on 1 Thes 5:12-13; Col 3:14
God provides the armor of love we choose to wear it.
• We have a part in keeping ourselves in love Jude 1:20-23
• Love can be pursued by us 1 Tim 6:11
There is an active part we play in developing love.
• Love comes from encouragement by the body Heb 10:23-25
• Love is modeled by others 2 Tim 3:10-11
• Intercessory prayer develops for God’s in the body 2 Cor 13:14; Philip 1:9; 1 Thes 3:11-13; 2 Thes 3:4-5
Paul continually prays for the development and manifestation of love among believers. It is in such a prayer that Paul reveals a four-step process to divine fullness. We will look more carefully at that Divine staircase next week.
• Full manifestation of God’s love comes through a four step process Eph 3:16-19
Strengthening by the Holy Spirit
Indwelling of Christ in love
Comprehension of the love of Christ for us and through us
Filling with divine fullness which is love
What continually motivates love?
• The Holy Spirit motivates us to minister to others.
• The hope found in the Gospel motivates our love for others Col 1:3-8
• Understanding Christ’s love for us motivates our love for others Philip 2:1-2; 1
John 4:19
• Forgiveness motivates love (Parable of the man forgiven a great debt.) Luke 6:27-38
• Personal sacrifice motivates love. (The father loves the son because he gave up his
life) Jn10:17
• We are to give serious though how to motivate one another to love Heb 10:23-25
• We inspire each other to love by example. 2 Cor 8:7-9
Conclusion
Next week we will look more specifically at a process for development of this love tht it may fully manifest in our life.
We have touched on a number of things concerning God’s love.
• It is impossible to do apart from God so depend on Him.
• It is larger that we can ever imagine so don’t limit your understanding.
• It touches and changes lives so anxiously look for opportunities to demonstrate love.
• It has no limits so never stop developing your capacity to love others.
• It is a gift of God who is love so gratefully receive it.
• It develops as we receive it, pray for it, pursue it and live it so pray for it, pursue it and choose to live it always.
NOTES:
What did God say to me personally today as a result of the teaching of His word?
