“Grieving the Holy Spirit”
Ephesians 4:30
REVIEW
I. Our Wealth and Worth In Christ 1-3
II. Our Worthy Walk in Christ 4-6
A. Live in Unity 4:1-16
B. Live in Newness of life 4:17-24
C. Live in Love 4:17-24
1. Speak truth not falsehood 4:25
2. Be angry without sinning 4:26-27
3. Stop stealing but work with your hands to give 4:28
4. Speak with your mouth to encourage and energize 4:29
5. Stop grieving the Holy Spirit 4:30
And stop grieving the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Ephesians 4:30
By using a present tense verb, Paul instructs the Ephesians to stop a current behavior.
These believers were grieving the Holy Spirit and Paul instructed them to knock it off.
Not only are we to be careful how we treat one another by purging destructive behavior and practicing positive behavior, we are to be aware of how our sinful behavior actually affects the Holy Spirit. We are to understand how our behavior affects the heart of God.
Somehow we get so concerning about how our actions might the people around us, we forget that the eternal God is also adversely affected by our sinful behavior. Our sin causes the heart of God to grieve.
Several questions rise to the surface in this verse that I invite you to explore with me.
What is grief and what does it feel like?
Who is the Holy Spirit?
What specifically grieves Him?
What core reason should motivate us to stop grieving Him?
The answer to these questions will become the subject of today's message. By the time we finish, I hope we become more aware of how our sinful behavior actually affects God and make every effort to stop it.
What is grief and what does it feel like?
The focus of this verse has to do with the emotion of grief. We know from Scripture that our God is a personal God. This applies to all three persons of the Trinity; Father/ Son/Holy Spirit. The Triune God is not just some energy force floating around the universe or some concept or philosophical idea.
They all have emotions, they all feel.
They feel pleasure. They feel the emotion of giving and receiving love. They feel anger.
They feel jealousy. They laugh and rejoice. They cry. They feel sorrow and pain. And from today's passage, we will explore their feeling of grief.
The word translate “grief” could also be translated sorrow or heaviness.
What does it feel like? It won't take too much probing to tap into this feeling because all of us have experienced it at one time or another in our life to some degree or another.
It's the feeling that rages inside the moment you hear about a loved one being diagnosed with a devastating illness. Cancer, Lou Gerigs, MS, Parkinson’s,
It’s what the disciples felt when Jesus told them he was going to die for the first time.
It's what the disciples felt when Jesus revealed one of them would betray him.
It's the feeling you get when you find out that you personally will have to face a very difficult or uncertain future. Perhaps your own terminal illness. It might be facing a court date or an upcoming interview that will determine your future.
Jesus felt grief in the garden of Gethsemane as he faced with the excruciating task of bearing all the sins of every person that ever lived and will live.
Here’s how Mark reported it.
And He took with Him Peter and James and John, and began to be very distressed and troubled. And He said to them, "My soul is deeply grieved to the point of death; remain here and keep watch." Mark 14:33-34
It’s the feeling you get when you see a friend mistreated. It was the feeling the fellow slaves felt when one of their fellow slaves refused to forgive another slave even after he had just been fully forgiven a huge debt by the master.
It’s the feeling you get when you have done something devastating that can't be retracted. The Bible records that Herod grieved after he was lured into cutting off John the Baptist's head.
It's the feeling you get when you've failed and hurt someone miserably. It's the feeling Peter felt when he betrayed Jesus and then when Jesus appeared to him after the resurrection and questioned him about his love.
It's the feeling you get when someone rejects you because of something you did. Paul told the Corinthians to do forgive a man that had been put out the fellowship but repented lest he be overwhelmed by excessive grief.
It's the heavy feeling that comes when you're under a load of trials.
It's the feeling comes from bad news; that early-morning phone call.
It’s the feeling we feel while sitting by the bedside of a sick loved one.
It’s the feeling we feel when confronted with the hardness of people's hearts at the plight of struggling people. It's what Jesus felt when the man with a withered hand came to Him at the synagogue.
All the Pharisees were concerned about was whether he was going to heal on the Sabbath not the wonder of seeing a man healed of a devastating physical impairment.
After looking around at them with anger, grieved at their hardness of heart, He said to the man, "Stretch out your hand." And he stretched it out, and his hand was restored. The Pharisees went out and immediately began conspiring with the Herodians against Him, as to how they might destroy Him. Mark 3:1-6
It's the feeling that comes when you think about loved ones who face an eternity without Christ. It's the passion Paul felt when he contemplated his lost countrymen.
I am telling the truth in Christ, I am not lying, my conscience testifies with me in the Holy Spirit, that I have great sorrow and unceasing grief in my heart. For I could wish that I myself were accursed, separated from Christ for the sake of my brethren, my kinsmen according to the flesh, Romans 9:1-3
It's the feeling that comes when we somebody important to us dies. Paul encouraged those who had lost loved ones by telling them that we don't grieve as do the rest to have no hope because we have a living hope. Paul shares the grief that accompanies Ministry to people.
Do you feel it? Can you identify with the feeling? All of us have felt grief at one time or another? It can be anywhere on the spectrum from slight to gut wrenching trauma.
Wayward children, lost loved ones, car wrecks, famines, disasters, abuse, devastating illnesses. Some of these things may cause anger but we also feel a deep indescribable ache inside. Bring to remembrance a time when you experienced grief. Remember how it felt.
Now think about the implications of this passage. Paul tells us that we can cause the Holy Spirit to feel that same way. Paul told the Ephesians to stop causing the Holy Spirit of God grief.
God has feelings.
I shall make mention of the lovingkindnesses of the Lord, the praises of the Lord, according to all that the Lord has granted us, and the great goodness toward the house of Israel, which He has granted them according to His compassion and according to the abundance of His lovingkindnesses. For He said, "Surely, they are My people, Sons who will not deal falsely." So He became their Savior. In all their affliction He was afflicted, and the angel of His presence saved them; in His love and in His mercy He redeemed them, and He lifted them and carried them all the days of old.
God identified with the distress of his people. He felt their affliction. He saved them. He carried them. How grateful they must've been. What praise they must have uttered from their lips for their deliverance. Not so!
But they rebelled and grieved His Holy Spirit; therefore He turned Himself to become their enemy, He fought against them. Isa 63:7-14
Parents supply for their children. They sacrifice in order that their children might have what they need. They get up in the middle of the night. They provide the best training and advice and boundaries they can so their children might avoid some of the painful pitfalls they experienced growing up. What do we expect in return? Not much. Respect. Cooperation. Gratitude. What happens when it doesn't come? How does it make us feel?
The same way it makes God feel when we rebelled against him.
How often they rebelled against Him in the wilderness and grieved Him in the desert! Again and again they tempted God, and pained the Holy One of Israel. They did not remember His power, The day when He redeemed them from the adversary, when He performed His signs in Egypt and His marvels in the field of Zoan, and turned their rivers to blood, and their streams, they could not drink. Psalms 78:40-44
I'm sure God feels the same way when we forget all he's done for us and rebel. We rebel against him in the wilderness and grieve him in the desert. Again and again we too pain the Holy One of Israel. We can bring grief and pain to God; the closer the relationship the sharper the pain. Paul warned the Ephesians to stop grieving the Holy Spirit of God.
Who is the Holy Spirit?
Paul refers to the Holy Spirit over 30 times in his letters. If you include other obvious references to the Holy Spirit without using his full name you have many more occurrences. He is one who is characterized by holiness, purity, absolute sinlessness.
He is God Himself. “the Holy Spirit of God”. The Holy Spirit is the third person of the Trinity. He is not a force or an “It”. He has all the attributes of personality just as the father and the son. He works in flawless conjunction with the other members the Trinity to bring about God's plan for the universe to enlist a company of creatures to become members of His Kingdom, His eternal community. He invites us to join the community of the eternal Trinity. Them in us, us in them; unified for eternity.
He did not just show up at Pentecost. He has been intimately involved in the whole plan from the very beginning. Jesus called him the encourager. His involvement in believer’s lives would make up for the physical absence of Jesus. He encourage just like Jesus did when He walked the earth with his disciples. He assured the disciples that they wouldn't be abandoned as orphans, but would be sent another encourager just like Jesus to continually come alongside them. There is a lot more that could be said about the ministry of the Holy Spirit but I don't want to lose sight of the main point of this passage which is, don't grieve him. We’ll consider more of the Holy Spirit a bit later in the letter.
There are some other sins against the Holy Spirit besides grieving that we commit.
Resisting
"You men who are stiff-necked and uncircumcised in heart and ears are always resisting the Holy Spirit; you are doing just as your fathers did. Acts 7:51
Quenching
Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. Do not quench the Spirit; do not despise prophetic utterances. But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good; abstain from every form of evil. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-22
Rejecting or disregarding
So, he who rejects this is not rejecting man but the God who gives His Holy Spirit to you. 1 Thessalonians 4:8
What grieves the Holy Spirit?
It could be said that any sin grieves the Holy Spirit. Some feel that the inclusion of "and" at the beginning of this verse was intended to connect it to what has been mentioned previously. The nearest issue was inappropriate worthless speech that hurts others rather than helps them. You could also add stealing, speaking falsehood, and even add some of the issues that will follow in the next verse.
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Ephesians 4:31
The Holy Spirit is the one who operates within the church to bring unity. He is the ultimate community organizer. He is the one who places us into the body of Christ and gifts the members to build one another up by their words and actions. He is the one who puts His seal upon each member until the ultimate expression of God’s new community of people blossoms. He is the one who indwells, fills, empowers, guides, enlightens and encourages.
The Holy Spirit is grieved by actions that disrupt community. He is grieved by those who work against his specific work. He is grieved when people deface his masterpiece and tear down His work. He is grieved when people pervert and misuse his resources. He is grieved when people either ignore his gifting intended to build the body or misuse it for selfish purposes. It is the Holy Spirit who empowers the members to live differently.
To act inappropriately toward fellow Christians is to oppose the very work He came to do.
What is a key motivation?
There are number of motivations that one could cite for not grieving the Holy Spirit.
Paul offers just one. Paul encourages us not to grieve the Holy Spirit because He is the one who is currently in charge of our life change. He is the one who seals us or marks us till the day of redemption. He is the one intimately involved in the everyday working out of our salvation. He is the one who permanently lives inside of us and sees everything we do and say every moment of the day. (2:22; I Cor. 3:16, 17; 6:19)
His intimate connection with our every thought word and deed produces either pleasure or pain. Give attention to your present relationship to the one who guarantees your future. Don’t grieve the one who cares for you and is deeply invested in you.
I guess the opposite of grieving would be to bring pleasure. Hebrews is pretty clear about the kind of work the Holy Spirit is doing within us.
So then, my beloved, just as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure.
How do we allow this salvation to work out of our life in cooperation with the Holy Spirit?
Do all things without grumbling or disputing; so that you will prove yourselves to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world, holding fast the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I will have reason to glory because I did not run in vain nor toil in vain. Philippians 2:12-16
I can't imagine the emotional trauma that intimate connection with 6 billion people and all of their issues bring. If the Holy Spirit's grieving is anything like the grief that I've experienced at points in my life I can't imagine how excruciating it must be.
First
May we realize the pain we have caused the heart of God and repent of causing such grief to the One committed to our ultimate refinement. May we grieve for causing him grief. Let us not be indifferent to how our behavior affects the heart of God.
Second
Let us resolve to bring him pleasure rather than pain; delight rather than displeasure
Let us work to hear him say well done good and faithful servant. Let us delight him with our worship. Let us delight him with our devotion. Let's delight him with our service to others. Let us delight him by our passion to know him more; learning about him, talking to him.
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in Your sight, O Lord, my rock and my Redeemer. Psa19:14
We can't forget that Jesus said, “As you have done it to the least of these in need, you have done it to me. Stop grieving the Holy Spirit who sealed you and will keep you till the day of full redemption.
Rather than what grieves the Holy Spirit, I want to take some time next week to explore what it is that pleases Him and the need to make pleasing God our top priority just as this week it is doing everything we can to not grieve Him.
The take home truth today is pretty clear.
Stop grieving the heart of God!
