"God’s Call for Intimacy" (Psalm 42) By Ptr Michael Cariño
Have you ever felt spiritually dry?
You go to church, read you bible, and pray, yet deep inside you still feel spiritually empty. You believe in Jesus, you follow Christ, and you know God yet your life is aimless and meaningless.
Many of us have been in those situations when we are expecting that we will experience spiritual “green pastures” – fruitful, fresh, and flourishing, yet all we encounter are “spiritual wilderness” – dry, miserable, discouraging. You have Christ in you but you feel so empty?
It is like being married to the person you love, yet you no longer enjoy each other’s company. You have lost that delight or pleasure of being together. There is no intimacy.
There was once a couple who lost their intimacy for each that they decided not to talk to each other anymore. Instead, they communicated by using “post it” notes that they stick on the wall or the refrigerator. So when they want to say things like “dinner is ready” or “ I will be out to the grocery” or “the phone bill is due today”, they will write notes on paper and post it on the wall.
One night, the husband decided to ask his wife to wake him up early the next morning so that he won’t be late for work. So wrote a note that said “wake me up at 5:00 am”, then he posted it on the toilet mirror for his wife to see.
The next morning, the husband woke up and it is already 8:00 am. He was so angry that his wife did not wake him up early. When he turned, he saw that a note is posted on his pillow. The note says. “It is 5:00 am. It’s time to wake up!”.
This is the exact opposite of intimacy in any relationship.
Intimacy means the relationship is thriving and flourishing, and not dying. Intimacy means there is deep connection and communication between the two people who love each other.
This is the same with our relationship with God.
God calls us to spiritual intimacy with Him. He desires and longs for us to be close to Him.
This is what separates Christianity from the other religions. We speak of a God who longs for a relationship, not a religion. A life of loving relationship, not a life of rules, rituals, and regulations.
God is the great “Lover of our Soul” who wants to relate to us like a “Good Father”, like a “Passionate Lover”, like an “Intimate Friend”, and like an “Excited Groom” longing for his bride.
All these images of God’s character speak of His love, of His passion, of His invitation for intimacy.
What is Intimacy with God?
“Spiritual Intimacy” is described as a passionate love to the One who loved us first. It is a relational closeness, a deep friendship, a delightful knowing, and a pleasurable companionship with God.
That is why when our spiritual lives are characterized by fear, pressure, or performance, we are not living in intimacy with God.
Our misconceptions of who God really is distorts how we relate to Him. When we see God as angry, strict, and tyrannical being we live miserable, unhappy, and impoverished spiritual lives. When we perceive God as a grumpy ruler who keeps a record or makes a list of all your failures and mistakes, checks it twice and finds out who is naughty or nice. We can never have intimacy with God.
We will always fear Him, avoid Him, hate Him, and perform for Him.
Would you rather spend time with the school principal or spend time with a loving friend?
For many of us, spending time with God is like being inside the principal’s office. It is terrifying! We avoid it. We hate it. We fear it. We may do it out of mere duty or obligation, but we feel miserable.
For some of us, being with God is like being with a loving friend. It is delightful! We feel happy. We have fun. We are relaxed. We do not have to perform or pretend. We can make mistakes and failures and still feel loved and accepted. We long for it. We are excited about it. We desire it more than anything. It is not out of duty or obligation, we do it out of pleasure.
Remember the truth about who our God is. We are not sinners in the hands of an angry tyrant. We are sinners in the hand of a loving dad. This is the root of all intimacy with God and passion for God. It is LOVE. Rules without relationship leads to rebellion. Truth without love leads to rejection.
The God of love wants us to love Him back.
Our work, our worship, and our ministry must be an overflow of our intimacy with God. The Christian’s fruitfulness and faithfulness should come from a heart that is madly in-love with Christ.
Why do we need intimacy with God?
I used to think that God is always angry and impatient. The result of this false belief in my spiritual life is that I am always afraid of Him and I do not want to be close to Him. I realized that I am unconsciously shaping God according to my own image. I am an impatient and angry person who have a low tolerance for mistakes and failures. I thought that God is like me.
The truth is, God is so unlike any one of us. He is not like us. That is the meaning of the word “holy” – “kadosh” – God is “wholly other”, God is totally “different”, God is “unique”, God is “set apart”, God is so “unlike” us.
That is why we need intimacy with God. The more we know God in a deeper way, the more we can live with the truth of who He really is.
Yes, God is so great and vast that there will always be something we’re discovering about Him in this lifetime. We may not be able to know everything about Him now, but that does not mean we can’t know Him better. God is making Himself known to His creation.
The closest words for the concept of intimacy with God is the word “yada” in Hebrew and “ginosko” in Greek. These words mean “to ‘know’ in a deep and intimate way”.
God calls us to spiritual intimacy with Him. He desires and longs for us to be close to Him.
This invitation was expressed in Psalms 42. This is one of the many passages in the Bible that calls us to a deep “relational trust” with God. The writer of this poetry is emotionally bombarded by discouragement, by doubt, by depression, and by desperation. Yet, because of his intimacy with God, because of His deep knowledge of God, because of His passion for God, he was able to spiritually find safety, security, and satisfaction amidst the darkness that surrounds him.
1. INTIMACY WITH GOD MAKES US SATISFIED.
“As the deer longs for streams of water, so I long for you, O God. I thirst for God, the living God.” (Psalm 42:1-2)
Every person longs for fulfillment and satisfaction in life. Part of being human is that we desire, we long, we crave, we thirst for things that we think will make us satisfied or fulfilled in life. Whether it is winning in that game we love, or achieving that goal we are working for, or buying that stuff we have been looking for, or fulfilling that dream we have been waiting for, or getting that recognition we want.
Biologists, sociologists, anthropologists, and psychologists all describe humans as passionate beings. We are passionately pursuing things that we think will truly satisfy us. We desire success, fame, wealth, acceptance, belongingness, love, safety, security, recognition. We desire good food, good friendship, good sex, good fun, good career, good family, and good things. To be human is to seek fulfillment, satisfaction, and happiness.
We were created for intimacy!
All our human cravings, desires, longings are all pointers to or indicators of something that will deeply satisfy. Deep within each of our passionate pursuits and intimate desires are actually cravings for the One who is source of true fulfillment and genuine happiness in life.
All our human cravings, desires, thirsts, hunger, and longings are links to God. Our passions reveal that we can never be happy in life without the “Stream of Living Water” who satisfies our soul’s thirst.
Our thirsty souls lead to the One who can truly quench our thirsts.
2. INTIMACY WITH GOD MAKES US SECURE.
“Now I am deeply discouraged, but I will remember you... each day the Lord pours his unfailing love upon me, and through each night I sing his songs, praying to God who gives me life.” (Psalm 42:6-8)
When we deeply know God, we become secure that no matter what happens to us His love will never change. His love never fails. We will be rested and be confident that our God is reliable, regardless of how the world around us behave. We can make mistakes and blunders, but we are secure at the truth that God will never abandon us.
Remember when you are still in the courtship stage of your relationship with your boyfriend or girlfriend. It is still very insecure and unstable. Both of you still fear that if someone makes a mistake, or wears the wrong clothes, or smells weird, or chooses the wrong gift, or says the wrong words, the relationship will end with a break up. It is very insecure.
But when you get married and you are both assured that you are deeply loved, you become more secure in the relationship. After many years of deeply knowing each other and being intimately in-love, no amount of mistakes, failures, and blunders can easily break up your love. You may wake up with a bad hair and a bad breath. You may smell bad and not look great because you are sick. You may gain "flabs" instead of "flat abs". Yet you still feel loved and accepted no matter what.
That is what love is! That is what intimacy does.
We do not need to perform or try to impress God to win His approval. He loves you no matter what. No strings attached. Unconditional love. His love does not keep a record of wrong. His love never fails. His love is the greatest – for better or for worst, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health.
3. INTIMACY WITH GOD MAKES US SAFE.
“Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again—my Savior and my God!” (Psalm 42:11)
When we are spiritually close to God, we feel safe. We are confident that God cares for us and He will take care of us. We may feel discouraged or depressed, but in spite of our troubles and difficulties we have hope that God is in charge and that He knows what He is doing. His ways and thoughts are higher and greater than our own understanding.
Christians get cancer too. Christians can go bankrupt too. Christians have marriage problems too. Christians get depressed too. Christians have disasters too.
But in all these things, we know that God works for the good of those who love Him. We feel safe. We have hope. God will take care us.
What hinders us from having intimacy with God?
• The illusion of independence
One barrier to being passionately in-love and intimate with God is the idea that we can live our lives without Him. We can pay lip service to loving God and trusting God. But deep within our hearts, we are in-charge of our own lives. Our way, instead of God’s way. Our will instead of God’s will. Our plan, instead of God’s plan
• The allure of lesser gods
Another barrier to intimacy or being close to God is our attraction to shiny things that the world offers. Idols of the heart, lust of the eyes, the pride of life, vain and shallow dreams – these pursuits become false substitutes to what really will make us happy. We buy things we do not need, to impress people we do not like, while using money we do not own, and live the life we do not really want.
• The tyranny of the urgent
So many things that we do are not really important, but they are urgent. We become slaves of doing things that do not matter, and we sacrifice the things in our lives that really matter the most – our family, our health, our peace of mind, our happiness, and our intimacy with God.
• The wounds of past disappointments
Sometimes we do not want to be intimate with God because we are disappointed with Him. We expect Him to do something or give something, yet He opted to not grant what our wish. This is really a question of trusting God even when He does not behave or act in a way that we want Him to be. These disappointments with God can make us distant from God and doubt His love.
How do we cultivate intimacy with God?
• Silence.
When we pause to be silent, we train our spirits to hear God’s still small voice. When we reduce the clutter of words and the abundance of noise in our lives, we learn to listen to God and to others. This kind of attentiveness to God’s Word and God’s world develops a strong spiritual center that invites intimacy with God.
• Solitude.
When we learn the power of being alone with God, we welcome the companionship of God. When we pause and withdraw away from the crowd, we train our spirits to rest and recharge. When we tune out all gadgets and clear our minds from all worries and concerns that surround us, we learn to reflect about life. Our private worship, our private prayer, our private journaling, our private readings --- they become sources of freshness and newness of life, like an oasis in the desert.
• Stillness.
When we learn to be still, slow down, and stay -- and stop moving and stop rushing, we receive the peace that comes from of God. This stillness and calmness of the soul becomes our antidote to a hurried life and the stressful life. When we learn how to meditate and quiet our hearts, we learn the power abiding in Christ. We find intimacy instead of weariness and burn out.
There was a season in my Christian life when I experienced what they call “burn out”. My spiritual world has become filled with work and many things to do. As a workaholic person, I found pleasure and a false sense of security in performing, in achieving, in doing, and in working. This led to a life of hurriedness, stress, pressure, weariness. I lost my quiet center, I lost my passion for God, I lost my appetite for God’s Word, and I lost my spiritual intimacy. I was so spiritually exhausted and dried up.
Now I am beginning to come back. I am realizing that if my inner life is crumbling, and my foundations are not strong, my external world will easily be destroyed by the storms of life. Now, I am renewing and re-strengthening my private worship, prayer, and journaling. In a sense, God is rekindling my love for Him and my passion for Him.
“In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength…” (Isaiah 30:15)
Oswald Chambers wrote, "It is a joy to Jesus when a person takes time to walk more intimately with Him. The bearing of fruit is always shown in Scripture to be a visible result of an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ." (My Utmost for His Highest)
Our work, our worship, and our ministry must be an overflow of our intimacy with God. The Christian’s fruitfulness and faithfulness should come from a heart that is madly in-love with Christ.
God wants to take each one of us deeper. And this requires an invitation to times of aloneness.
The strength that is needed at the foundation of your life in order to stay consistently stable in hard times. Your foundation has to be strong so that no storm in life can penetrate your firm trust in the Lord.
The quality of our aloneness with God can actually enhance the quality of our time with others.
The stability of the trees depended on how deep the roots went below the surface. Shallow roots could not stand the force of even a small hurricane.
Likewise, right now God is developing your prayer life and the depth of your personal relationship with Him. God is inviting you to enter into deeper intimacy.
Cultivate holy aloneness with God on a daily basis-plan it in your schedule. Sacrifice in order to give God your time.
Summary:
God’s Call for Intimacy (Psalm 42)
• Intimacy with God Makes Us Satisfied.
• Intimacy with God Makes Us Secure.
• Intimacy with God Makes Us Safe.
I pray that you discover that the life of silence, solitude, and stillness are the keys to a flourishing, overcoming, and vibrant spiritual life. The cultivation of a strong inner life is the source of deep love and deep intimacy with God. I pray that you learn the power of the unhurried life, and that you realize in a fresh way that only God’s love is the source of true joy, lasting fulfillment and genuine satisfaction in this life.
