I CHOOSE TO LOVE MY FAMILY FIRST
LUKE 12:13-21
LAST WEEK WE LOOKED AT CAPACITY CHOICES INVOLVING FORGIVENESS OF OTHERS AND TRUST. ESSENTIALLY WE ARE GOING TO TRUST AND LEAVE OUR FUTURE IN GOD’S HANDS, OR WE ARE GOING TO TRY TO MANAGE OUR FUTURE IN OUR OWN POWER. SINCE WE CANNOT CONTROL OUR FUTURE IT IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR US TO CONTROL IT IN OUR OWN POWER. WE NEED TO DEPEND ON GOD AND PUT OUR TRUST IN HIM.
OUR NEXT CATEGORY OF CHOICES ARE CLOSELY RELATED TO THESE CATEGORY CHOICES, AND ARE PRIORITY CHOICES. CAPACITY CHOICES SHOW US THAT WE HAVE LIMITED CAPACITY TO DO THINGS, AND OUR CAPACITY LESSENS AS WE AGE. PRIORITY CHOICES ALLOW US TO LIST AND DO WHAT WE FEEL ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS WITHIN OUR LIMITED CAPACITY.
WHETHER OR NOT WE REALIZE IT, WE MAKE PRIORITY DECISIONS ALL THE TIME, AGAIN SOME MAY BE MINOR AND SOME MAJOR IN NATURE. SOME OF OUR PRIORITY CHOICES WILL BE GOOD AND OTHERS QUESTIONABLE. AT TIMES WE MAY CHOOSE THE PROPER PRIORITY, BUT IF THE INTENTION IS WRONG, THEN THE DESIRED GOAL WILL NOT BE ATTAINED.PRIORITY CHOICES ARE MOST IMPORTANT AND VISIBLE WHERE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GETTING THEM RIGHT OR WRONG IS MOST APPARENT
TWO CHOICES THAT I WANT TO CONCENTRATE ON ARE:
1. THE CHOICE TO LOVE MY FAMILY FIRST
2. THE CHOICE TO BE AUTHENTIC
GOD USES THE FAMILY IN THE BIBLE TO SERVE AS AN EXAMPLE OF HOW OUR RELATIONSHIP SHOULD BE TO THE CHURCH AND TO OUR IMMEDIATE FAMILY. WE REFER TO EACH OTHER AS BROTHER AND SISTER, AND PAUL GIVES US THE PRIMARY REASON WHY WE MARRY IN EPHESIANS.
EPHESIANS 5:32-33:
32 THIS IS A PROFOUND MYSTERY—BUT I AM TALKING ABOUT CHRIST AND THE CHURCH. 33 HOWEVER, EACH ONE OF YOU ALSO MUST LOVE HIS WIFE AS HE LOVES HIMSELF, AND THE WIFE MUST RESPECT HER HUSBAND.
HERE PAUL IS TELLING US THAT THE MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP, IS A PHYSICAL EXAMPLE OF THE LOVE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN CHRIST AND THE CHURCH. THE WAY THAT CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH, SACRIFICING HIMSELF FOR IT IN LOVE AT CALVARY, IS TO BE THE EXAMPLE FOR CHRISTIAN MARRIAGES TODAY. HOW’S THAT FOR SETTING THE BAR HIGH.
OUR SCRIPTURE READING TODAY IS A PARABLE ABOUT A MAN WHO SET HIS PRIORITIES. AS A PARABLE I WANT YOU TO REALIZE THAT ALL OF THE FACTS OF THE STORY ARE NOT GIVEN TO US, ONLY THOSE THAT ARE NEEDED FOR JESUS TO PROVE HIS POINT.
JESUS HAS BEEN APPROACHED BY A MAN TO SETTLE A DISPUTE ABOUT AN INHERITANCE. WE DON’T KNOW THE SPECIFICS OF THE DISPUTE, AND HIS CLAIM MAY HAVE BEEN LEGITIMATE, BUT JESUS USED THE QUESTION TO TEACH ON THE ISSUE OF PRIORITIES.
THE MAN IN JESUS’ PARABLE WAS VERY WELL OF. FOR SEVERAL YEARS HE HAD BOUNTIFUL HARVESTS, WITH THIS LAST ONE BEING THE BEST OF ALL. HIS LAND PRODUCED SO BOUNTIFULLY THAT HE HAD NO PLACE TO STORE HIS CROPS.
WE ARE NOT TOLD WHAT HE DID WITH HIS CROP, WHETHER HE SHARED IT WITH PEOPLE OR NOT. WE ARE TOLD THAT HE BUILT BIGGER BARNS TO STORE THE CROPS, AND THAT HE HAD ENOUGH FOR HIMSELF TO LAST SEVERAL YEARS.
THE KEY TO THE RICH MAN’S ATTITUDE IS FOUND IN VESE 19.
LUKE 12:19: AND I’LL SAY TO MYSELF, “YOU HAVE PLENTY OF GRAIN LAID UP FOR MANY YEARS. TAKE LIFE EASY; EAT, DRINK AND BE MERRY
THIS ATTITUDE DISPLAYS SELFISH PRIORITIES. NOTE THE MANY PERSONAL PRONOUNS USED IN THE PARABLE. HE BUILT HIS LIFE ON WHAT HE COULD DO AND POSSESS.
THERE ARE RICH MEN TODAY WHO’S ONLY PRIORITY IS THEIR MONEY AND FAME. THEIR ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FINISH THE DAY ONE DOLLAR RICHER THAN THEY WERE AT THE BEGINNING. ALL OTHER THINGS, FAMILY, GOD, THEIR HEALTH, TAKE SECOND PLACE TO THE MIGHTY DOLLAR. IT IS LIKE THIS UNTIL SOMETHING HAPPENS THAT MONEY CANNOT FIX.
WHEN JESUS SPOKE OF THE MAN’S UPCOMING DEATH, HE SHOWED HOW WRONG THE MAN’S PRIORITIES WERE. HIS MONEY COULDN’T HELP WHEN IT CAME TO ETERNAL CHOICES. THE OLD SAYING IS TRUE, “THERE ARE NO U-HAULS IN BACK OF HEARSES.”
THE ISSUE HERE IS NOT THAT IT IS WRONG TO HAVE NICE MATERIAL THINGS, BECAUSE IT ISN’T, BUT NOT TO MAKE THE ACQUISITION OF MATERIAL THINGS THE ONLY PRIORITY IN YOUR LIFE.
MATTHEW 6:19-21:
DO NOT STORE UP FOR YOURSELVES TREASURES ON EARTH, WHERE MOTHS AND VERMIN DESTROY, AND WHERE THIEVES BREAK IN AND STEAL. 20 BUT STORE UP FOR YOURSELVES TREASURES IN HEAVEN, WHERE MOTHS AND VERMIN DO NOT DESTROY, AND WHERE THIEVES DO NOT BREAK IN AND STEAL. 21 FOR WHERE YOUR TREASURE IS, THERE YOUR HEART WILL BE ALSO.
WE NEED TO SET OUR PRIORITIES FOR OUR LIVES, BASED ON THE WORD OF GOD, SET THEM AS EARLY AS POSSIBLE, AND STICK WITH THEM.
PROVERBS 4:26: GIVE CAREFUL THOUGHT TO THE PATHS FOR YOUR FEET AND BE STEADFAST IN ALL YOUR WAYS.
POINT ONE: ESTABLISHING GUIDELINES FOR PRIORITIES:
WHAT ARE SOME GUIDELINES WE CAN USE TO HELP US ESTABLISH PRIORITIES TO LIVE BY.
1. LOVE GOD: OUR RELATIONSHIP TO GOD IS FOUNDATIONAL TO OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH OTHERS. A PROPER RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD HELPS YOU ESTABLISH AND SUSTAIN ALL OTHER GUIDELINES. IT IS ESSENTIAL THAT GOD HAVE FIRST PLACE IN ALL THINGS.
DEUTERONOMY 6:5: LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL AND WITH ALL YOUR STRENGTH
JAMES MacDONALD WRITES:
“FOLLOW CHRIST FIRST, ABOVE EVERYTHING – ABOVE YOUR SPOUSE, YOUR CHILDREN, AND YOUR FAMILY. PROVE TO THEM THAT YOU CAN LOVE THEM BETTER WHEN YOU LOVE CHRIST FIRST.”
2. PUT FAMILY FIRST: NEXT TO YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD, YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO YOUR FAMILY SHOULD BE YOUR MOST PRECIOUS POSSESSION.
MATTHEW 22:36-37:
JESUS REPLIED: “ ‘LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’ I 38 THIS IS THE FIRST AND GREATEST COMMANDMENT. 39 AND THE SECOND IS LIKE IT: ‘LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.
JESUS TEACHES US HERE THAT WE ARE TO LOVE OUR NEIGHBORS, AND OUR FAMILY IS OUR FIRST CIRCUMFERENCE OF NEIGHBORS.
3. WORK HARD: THIS IS A PRIORITY THAT BUILDS SELF RESPECT FOR THE INDIVIDUAL, AND FOR GOD.
4. TELL THE TRUTH: GOD CAN DO A LOT WITH ANY SITUATION AND WITH YOUR HEART AS LONG AS YOU TELL THE TRUTH.
5. BE POSITIVE AND KIND: THINK OF OTHERS AND THEIR FEELINGS BEFORE YOURSELF. DO THE THOUGHTFUL THING.
POINT TWO: I CANNOT FAIL AT FAMILY
THE FAMILY IS ONE OF THE MAJOR SPIRITUAL BATTLEFIELDS IN SOCIETY TODAY. SATAN KNOWS IF HE CAN DESTROY THE FAMILY HE CAN GREATLY INHIBIT THE WORK OF THE CHURCH. THAT IS WHY YOU AND I CANNOT FAIL AT FAMILY. PEOPLE WATCH US TO SEE IF WE STAND BEHIND WHAT WE SAY WITH OUR ACTIONS. THEREFORE:
1. OUR FAMILY MUST BE OUR TREASURE: WHERE YOUR TREASURE IS, THERE YOUR HEART WILL BE ALSO. BUT BE CAREFUL. WHEN YOU PLAN A FAMILY NIGHT PLAN AN ACTIVITY OF SOME KIND. YOU ARE NOT BONDING IF YOU ARE CONSTANTLY JUST WATCHING TELEVISION, ARE ON THE COMPUTER, OR TALKING ON THE PHONE.
BE PASSIONATE ABOUT YOUR FAMILY. MAKE YOUR TIME WITH THEM THE SUBJECT OF YOUR GREATEST PRAYERS AND PLANNING. PROTECT THIS TIME AND TREAT IT AS AN APPOINTMENT YOU HAVE TO KEEP.
2. EXPRESS YOUR COMMITMENT: A MAJOR WAY TO COMMUNICATE VALUE TO YOUR FAMILY IS TO FIND CREATIVE WAYS TO EXPRESS YOUR COMMITMENT TO THEM.
WHEN I DRIVE MY WIFE TO WORK, ONE OF THE LAST THINGS WE TELL EACH OTHER IS “I LOVE YOU.” WE DON’T KNOW WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN DURING THE DAY, BUT IF SOMETHING BAD SHOULD HAPPEN, OUR LAST WORDS TO EACH OTHER WILL BE WORDS OF LOVE.
SOMEONE SAID TO HER ONE DAY, “I DON’T TELL MY WIFE EACH DAY “I LOVE YOU”. DOES THAT MEAN THERE’S SOMETHING WRONG WITH MY MARRIAGE?
THE FACT THAT HE DID NOT SAY HE LOVED HIS WIFE EACH DAY DID NOT MEAN THERE WAS SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE MARRIAGE. THE FACT THAT HE DIDN’T RECOGNIZE THIS AND HAD TO ASK THE QUESTION INDICATES THAT PRIORITIES ARE NOT WHERE THEY SHOULD BE.
3. COUNT THE COST OF LOVING YOUR FAMILY:
LUKE 14:28: SUPPOSE ONE OF YOU WANTS TO BUILD A TOWER. WON’T YOU FIRST SIT DOWN AND ESTIMATE THE COST TO SEE IF YOU HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO COMPLETE IT?
TO TRULY LOVE SOMEONE IS GOING TO COST YOU, AND YOU MUST COUNT THAT COST BEFORE YOU ENTER THE RELATIONSHIP. THE LITMUS TEST FOR PAYING THE COST IS TO BE ABLE TO STAND WITH YOUR SPOUSE AFTER 20, 30, 40, 50, OR 80 YEARS OF MARRIAGE AND SAY “I STILL DO.” THAT POWER WILL FLOW TO YOUR CHILDREN AND GRAND AND GREAT GRAND CHILDREN.
4. LOVE YOUR FAMILY BY FINISHING THE COURSE: IN A WORLD FULL OF QUITTERS, JESUS IS LOOKING FOR FINISHERS. PEOPLE AND FAMILY WILL KNOW WHAT YOU PROFESS AND ARE WATCHING TO SEE IF YOU KEEP YOUR COMMITMENT.
CONCLUSION:
I WANT TO CONCLUDE BY POINTING OUT THAT LOVE WILL ALWAYS CONQUER SELFISHNESS IN OUR LIVES. IT IS AGAPE LOVE THAT WILL ALLOW US THE STRENGTH AND POWER TO PUT OUR FAMILY FIRST.
OUR RESPONSIVE READING TODAY IS KNOWN AS THE LOVE CHAPTER (1 CORINTHIANS 13). IN IT WE LEARN TO OVERCOME SELFISH DESIRES, AND THINK AND ACT FOR OTHERS. CONSIDER THE CHARACTERISTICS OF AGAPE THAT IT MENTIONS.
LOVE DOES NOT: ENVY
BOAST
INSIST ON IT’S OWN WAY
IS NOT: RUDE
IRRITABLE OR RESENTFUL
LOVE IS: PATIENT
KIND
LOVE WILL ALWAYS CONQUER SKEPTICISM AND BELIEVES THE BEST IN A PERSON AND PATIENTLY WAITS FOR GOD’S AGENDA TO BE ACCOMPLISHED IN THAT PERSON.
LOVE PRACTICES PATIENCE
LOVE BEARS ALL THINGS. IT DOES NOT KEEP SCORE BUT KEEPS MOVING FORWARD.
LOVE BELIEVES AND BEARS ALL THINGS.
LOVE DOES NOT SETTLE FOR THE STATUS QUO. IT DOESN’T TRICK ITSELF INTO THINKING EVERYTHING WILL AUTOMATICALLY BE ALL RIGHT. LOVE ADMITS PROBLEMS CAN EXIST AND COOPERATES WITH GOD TO SOLVE THEM AND MAKE TRANSFORMATION HAPPEN. LOVE IS AN ACTION BEFORE IT’S A FEELING.
KEEP DOING THE THINGS THAT DRAW YOU CLOSE, AND IF YOU HAVE STOPPED DOING THEM, START AGAIN. WHEN YOU START DOING THE LOVING THINGS, THE GIVING THINGS, THE SELFLESS THINGS AGAIN, THEN YOU ARE CHOOSING YOUR FAMILY AS YOUR HIGHEST HUMAN PRIORITY.
CHOOSE TO MAKE AND KEEP YOUR FAMILY AS YOUR HIGHEST HUMAN PRIORITY AND WATCH GOD TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE AND YOUR FAMILIES LIFE AS A RESULT.
