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Sermon: "Sexual Sanity In a Morally Broken World"
Series: "Wise Living in a Foolish World"
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REV. BILL BOWDLE
Preached at Bethel UM Church, Bethel, OH 02/05/2011
Posted 2/6/2018 - Retired since 06/2014
Today’s Superbowl is biggest football game of year
Last year's Super Bowl drew largest audience in American television history, averaging 111 million viewers and 163 million people who watched at least part of the game.
Average cost of SuperBowl Advertisements this yr. $ 3.5 million dollars for 30 second ad..
Many of you will be in television audience for that game.
But there’s another game going on in our world. Bigger than the SuperBowl. Oldest game in existence.
Most passionate game on planet. You’re not just in the audience in this game. You’re a player in this game even if only in your mind.
If the statistics I read are correct some of you are having the battle of your life playing this game.
It’s the game of Human Sexuality..
This Game began for you when your biological parents kicked off your life with successful sexual activity.
From the very beginning you were either male or female in genetic makeup.
Terri Fisher, PhD, professor of psychology at The Ohio State University at Mansfield in the January 2012 issue of the Journal of Sex Research studied how often men and women think about sexual matters each day.
Results: men average 19x / day
women averaged 10x / day
God created first human parents male and female; He called his creation very good. God created and commanded
sexual activity between Adam & Eve “Be fruitful and multiply.”
If you think God doesn’t like sex just read the OT book of the Song of Solomon
It is is a very sexual book celebrating love between a man a woman.
Funny story: A father asked his son, aged 10, if he knew about the birds and bees.
"I don't want to know!" The child said, bursting into tears.
father asked son what was wrong.
His son cried out: "dad,at age six I got the 'there's no Santa' speech.
At age seven I got the 'there's no Easter Bunny' s speech.
Then at age 8 you hit me with the 'there's no Tooth Fairy' s speech!
And now you’re ready to give me the “There’s no Sex speech, and I don’t want to hear it.
He needn’t worry: Sex it here to stay...
Sex is God’s idea, God’s creation, part of God’s plan for his world.
The game of boy friends / girl friends, romantic attraction, courtship and marriage, sexual relations, childbirth and family is the oldest, most exciting, most universal game on the planet.
Very clearly in scripture, God created sexuality to enable a man and a woman to come together and to unite in physical and emotional intimacy as husband & wife.
Sexual intimacy is completely human, (But It is clear in scriptures that singles are fully human w/o sexual intimacy.
Jesus was fully human, but lived as a single w/o marriage.
So single people are completely and fully human whether or not they are married, or even if they never marry.)
God chose to use sexual intimacy as his opportunity to create new children in this world.
He has entrusted this gift of sexual capacities to human race expecting us to guard it carefully and to preserve
our sexual behaviors for the marriage relationship.
Sex is not Satan’s creation. But Satan has invaded the playing field of human sexual behavior, and he has intercepted God’s good gift so he can use sex as a tool of temptation to tackle and sack you to shame and defeat you, to kill your life with God and to destroy the oldest and most impt. institution on earth, MARRIAGE & THE FAMILY.
Satan is doing everything possible to disconnect sexuality from God’s
intended purpose.
He tempts singles to sexual intimacy before marriage
He tempts married partners to adulterous relationships outside marriage with unlawful partners
He tempts some people to sex for hire with prostitutes He tempts some people to homosexual relationships
with same sex partners. He tempts other people to incestuous relationships within families. He tempts people to impose sex on others in rape or sexual abuse.
He tempts a huge % of people to solo sexuality by inciting their desire for printed or media pornography
He tempts a few people to perverted sex in relationships of bestiality with animals.
I tell you, the SuperBowl is small stuff compared to the game of Super Sexuality I’m talking about today.
I want to give some halt-time hints from the word of God, to help you manage your game.
Many chapters of Proverbs were written from caring father, Solomon, to his son.
Chap. 2,3,4,5,6,7 - open: To my son or sons
Chap. 5,6,7 - written esp. to warn about sexual entanglements with a partner outside marriage.
Though written from a father to his son to help him avoid being sexually captured by any seductress, the principles for sexual victory apply equally well for females who are struggling for sexual discipline.
So here are some halftime instructions written in God’s word that I want to post on the halftime board before we send you back out into the game.
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1. ? PREPARE IN ADVANCE
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Get prepared for temptation before it hits
Superbowl players enter game prepared!! Study the plays, Practice their moves.
In the game of super sexuality, if you don’t prepare for victory before you enter
the playing field, the devil’s got you tackled before the opening kickoff.
A. Train yourself in God’s word
Pr 6:20-24 My son, keep your father's commands and do not forsake your mother's teaching. {21} Bind them upon your heart forever; fasten them around your neck. {22} When you walk, they will guide you; when you sleep, they will watch over you; when you awake, they will speak to you. {23} For these commands are a lamp, this teaching is a light, and the corrections of discipline are the way to life, {24} keeping you from the immoral woman, from the smooth tongue of the wayward wife.
(Prov 7:1-5 NIV) My son, keep my words and store up my commands within you. {2} Keep my commands and you will live; guard my teachings as the apple of your eye. {3} Bind them on your fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart. {4} Say to wisdom, "You are my sister," and call understanding your kinsman; {5} they will keep you from the adulteress, from the wayward wife with her seductive words.
B. Live life in full connection with God.. you can’t hide from God. He knows what you’re doing
Prov 5:21-23 For a man's ways are in full view of the LORD, and he examines all his paths.
Seek vibrant connection with God and to be filled with God.
We’re rarely successful in driving out negatives form our lives, unless we’re simultaneously filling our lives with the positive.
Our God, who knows all and who knows you best, wants to fill you most.
His full presence in your life is the key to defeating sexual temptation.
C. Learn to Accept discipline, correction & teaching
Solomon warned his sons, if they gave in to sexual temptation, they’d confess w. regret:
Pr 5:12-13 You will say, "How I hated discipline! How my heart spurned correction! {13} I would not obey my teachers or listen to my instructors.
Get you live in the habit of accepting guidance from God’s word.
D. Cultivate a healthy relationship with your own spouse
Solomon gets very picturesque, and frankly, quite graphic:
Prov 5:15-20 Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. {16} Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? {17} Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers. {18} May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. {19} A loving doe, a graceful deer-- may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love. {20} Why be captivated, my son, by an adulteress? Why embrace the bosom of another man's wife?
Cultivating a healthy relationship at home is a great preventative for being attracted to an unhealthy
relationship outside the home.
E. Don’t intentionally go near temptation
Prov 5:7-8 Now then, my sons, listen to me; do not turn aside from what I say. {8} Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house
Pr 7:6-9 At the window of my house I looked out through the lattice. {7} I saw among the simple, I noticed among the young men, a youth who lacked judgment. {8} He was going down the street near her corner, walking along in the direction of her house {9} at twilight, as the day was fading, as the dark of night set in.
Pr 7:25 Do not let your heart turn to her ways or stray into her paths.
Means
there are some TV programs, you just can’t turn on.
Some search terms, you don’t intentionally type into Google search or Bing.com
Some people, you should not go near.
Some flirtatious conversations, don’t ever begin.
Don’t flirt with temptation by intentionally putting yourself near an opportunity for sexual temptation.
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2. ? Beware Satan’s Strategy for Your Sexual Failure
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A. Satan will pursue your sexual weaknesses aggressively
Pr 6:26 ... the adulteress preys upon your very life.
Pr 9:14-17 She sits at the door of her house, on a seat at the highest point of the city, {15} calling out to those who pass by, who go straight on their way. {16} "Let all who are simple come in here!" she says to those who lack judgment.
Pr 7:13,15 She took hold of him and kissed him and with a brazen face ....{15} So I came out to meet you; I looked for you and have found you!
B. Satan smooth talks you into submission
Prov 7:21 With persuasive words she led him astray; she seduced him with her smooth talk.
Prov 5:3 For the lips of an adulteress drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil;
Prov 6:24 keep you from the immoral woman, from the smooth tongue of the wayward wife.
Prov 7:5 keep you from the adulteress, from the wayward wife with her seductive words.
Satan’s smooth words....
“You deserve these pleasures...”
“It’s only natural”
“Do what YOU feel like”
“Do whatever feels natural..”
C. Tempter appeals to your ego..
Temptress said to young man: Pr 7:15 So I came out to meet you; I looked for you and have found you!
Beware the temptation of flattery ... the power of someone who builds you up. In your weak ego,
you may feel very flattered by someone who makes themselves intimately available to you.
Makes you feel impt.
Makes you feel significant
Makes you feel wanted
Sexual tempation is often more about this potent appeal to our ego than it is the sheer power of physical pleasure.
We get stirred by that notion that someone finds us attractive and desirable.
D. Tempter offers the thrill of the forbidden
The temptress said: (Prov 9:17 NIV) "Stolen water is sweet..."
There’s a certain “electric power” in the appeal of the forbidden.
E. Tempter Offers Secrecy
“No one will ever know..”
The temptress in Proverbs said: Pr 9:17 ...food eaten in secret is delicious!"
Pr 7:19-20 My husband is not at home; he has gone on a long journey. {20} He took his purse filled with money and will not be home till full moon."
But the reality is:
God knows,
You know,
Your spouse will know ...
F. Tempter Paints an enticing visual picture
Pr 7:16-20 She took hold of him and kissed him and with a brazen face she said: {14} "I have fellowship offerings at home; today I fulfilled my vows. {15} So I came out to meet you; I looked for you and have found you! {16} I have covered my bed with colored linens from Egypt. {17} I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes and cinnamon. {18} Come, let's drink deep of love till morning; let's enjoy ourselves with love! {19} My husband is not at home; he has gone on a long journey. {20} He took his purse filled with money and will not be home till full moon."
G. Tempter tried to push you past the point where you have the power to resist ...
Pr 7:21-23 With persuasive words she led him astray; she seduced him with her smooth talk. {22} All at once he followed her like an ox going to the slaughter, like a deer stepping into a noose {23} till an arrow pierces his liver, like a bird darting into a snare, little knowing it will cost him his life.
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3. ? Be Aware of Consequences of Sexual Failure
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Prov 5:4-5 NIV) but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword. {5} Her feet go down to death; her steps lead straight to the grave.
Death of current relationship
Death of trust
Death of opportunity
Many a political figure lost their political
opportunity thru sexual misadventure
e.g., Herman Cain
e.g., John Edwards
Note the powerful descriptive words Solomon uses to describe the outcome of sexual indiscipline.
Prov 5:8-14 NIV) Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house, {9} lest you give your best strength to others and your years to one who is cruel, {10} lest strangers feast on your wealth and your toil enrich another man's house. {11} At the end of your life you will groan, when your flesh and body are spent. {12} You will say, "How I hated discipline! How my heart spurned correction! {13} I would not obey my teachers or listen to my instructors. {14} I have come to the brink of utter ruin in the midst of the whole assembly."
Prov 5:22-23 NIV) The evil deeds of a wicked man ensnare him; the cords of his sin hold him fast. {23} He will die for lack of discipline, led astray by his own great folly.
Prov 6:26-29 NIV) for the prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread, and the adulteress preys upon your very life. {27} Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? {28} Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched? {29} So is he who sleeps with another man's wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished.
Prov 6:32-35 NIV) But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself. {33} Blows and disgrace are his lot, and his shame will never be wiped away; {34} for jealousy arouses a husband's fury, and he will show no mercy when he takes revenge. {35} He will not accept any compensation; he will refuse the bribe, however great it is.
Prov 7:22-23 NIV) All at once he followed her like an ox going to the slaughter, like a deer stepping into a noose {23} till an arrow pierces his liver, like a bird darting into a snare, little knowing it will cost him his life.
Prov 7:26-27 NIV) Many are the victims she has brought down; her slain are a mighty throng. {27} Her house is a highway to the grave, leading down to the chambers of death.
Prov 9:18 NIV) But little do they know that the dead are there, that her guests are in the depths of the grave.
Prov 22:14 NIV) The mouth of an adulteress is a deep pit; he who is under the Lord's wrath will fall into it.
Conclusion
If we don’t want to fail in the hotly contested game of human sexual behavior, we need God’s help to equip us for sexual sanity in this morally broken world.
1 -Prepare for Temptation In Advance
2 - Know The Tempter’s Strategy to Defeat You
3 - Know the Consequences of Defeat..
I share these half time instructions from scripture, not in the manner of a condemning prophet, but with the spirit
of a compassionate pastor. We all have fallen and failed in these matters, in mind and spirit at minimum.
But just as I have compassion for any among us who struggle deeply with following God’s word in these matters,
I must also offer the clear counsel of God’s word. He is the author and creator of human sexuality, and we will only find ultimate peace and fulfillment in these matters when we bring our lives under the discipline and instruction of God’s word.
(Rom 8:1 NIV) Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,
