Philemon: An Appeal to Forgive
by, Tony Thomas
Sr. Minister, Woodland Heights Christian Church, Crawfordsville, IN
No. 57 in a series called, Route 66, a Road Trip Through the Bible
Several TV mini-series were popular during the 80s. For example, some of my favorites were The Blue and the Grey (1982), The Winds of War (1983) ... Anne of Green Gables and The Civil War (1990).
But the No. 1 series of all-time was Roots, based on Alex Haley’s 1976 novel. It received 37 Emmy Award nominations (won 9), and it also won a Golden Globe and Peabody award. The series revolved around Kunta Kinte, played by Levar Burton and John Amos.
That story opened in 1750. Kunta Kinte grew up in Gambia, West Africa, and he was trained to become a Mandinka Warrior. But, he was captured by black collaborators, sold to a slave trader, chained in the hold of a slave ship and transported to Colonial America.
A plantation owner named John Reynolds purchased Kunta Kinte and changed his name to Toby. But Kunta Kinte dreamed of going home, so he ran away. When he was captured he was whipped, and when he healed up he ran away again. Eventually some bounty hunters caught him, tied him to a tree and severed one of his feet in half!
To give you some idea of how popular that series was, it aired for eight consecutive nights on ABC, it was watched by 140 million Americans (that represents nearly 80% of the total viewership), and more than half of all Americans!
Kunta Kinte passed on his dream of freedom to his daughter Kizzy and his grandson Chicken George. Six
generations later, when Alex Haley discovered his legacy, he wrote a book that inspired an entire generation! African American’s from one coast to the other began naming their children after the characters on Roots, names like Kunta, Kinte, Bell, Kizzy, George, Fiddler and Fanta.
We’re in a series called Route 66 and today we’re covering the shortest New Testament book (25 verses). It’s from Paul to Philemon, a first century slave owner. And Paul encourages Philemon to forgive his runaway slave, Onesimus.
I want to break these 25 verses down into four parts: the background, the historical setting, the book and the application. If you’re a child or if you dread the routine of your factory job, you might feel like a slave. But all of us have been offended and we need to forgive.
No one is born with that ability. It is a learned behavior that requires your deliberate choice. I hope you will pray and listen carefully to what God teaches. As the Psalmist writes, “May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O lord my strength/Redeemer” (Psalms 19:14).
I. The Background
About 5-6 years before he was executed, Paul wrote a brief letter to a friend who lived in Colossae. His name was, “Philemon, a dear and fellow worker” (Philemon 1). His wife was Apphia and his son was Archippus. And, the church met in his home.
The other person who made up the household of Philemon was Onesimus, a slave. Onesimus means, “profitable, or helpful.”
Paul wrote Philemon, asking him to accept back, forgive and restore his runaway slave. Why did Onesimus run away? Apparently, Onesimus was guilty of theft. When his dastardly deed was discovered, he fled to Rome to blend in with the city’s slave population.
In the providence of God he somehow crossed paths with Paul who was under house arrest. Guess what happened? Onesimus was converted to faith in Jesus Christ! This is what we call a God thing! His conversion, however, wasn’t the end of his story, it’s just beginning:
A second pastor named Epaphras showed up in Rome to check on Paul. Epaphras preached in Colossae, and guess where Onesimus fled from? Yep. Colossae!
We read earlier that the church met in Philemon’s house. One of the blessings of a small church is that you know everybody. And one of the disadvantages of a small church is that everybody knows you!
When I began my youth ministry in Harrison, OH, the church was still small. I think the attendance on my first Sunday was somewhere around 150. It would eventually grow to an average of 475 each week, but when it was 150 it was easy to know everybody.
I knew everybody’s name, what kind of car they drove, where they worked, what they ate. I even knew the names of their pets!
Paige Hudson is the eldest child of John and Angie Hudson, and last fall she showed up at church wearing a Bears’ jersey. So I asked, “Do you like the Bears? Or does your Dad?”
Paige thought about that for a second and said, “I do.”
So I asked who her favorite player was. She thought about that and said, “The quarterback.”
I knew she didn’t know the name of the quarterback but I was impressed that an eight-year-old knew about the position. So I asked, “What’s his name?”
Paige thought about that for a second and replied, “Bob?”
I’m a Colts’ fan so I don’t know anything about the Bears, but I was fairly certain that the Bears didn’t have a quarterback named Bob! But given their record in recent years, the chances are pretty high that they’ll eventually land a quarterback named Bob.
The day Paige graduates from high school I’m still gonna remember that Bob, the QB, is her favorite Bear! In a smaller church, you get the chance to know most of your members.
When Onesimus saw Epaphras, what are the chances that Epaphras recognized the slave of Philemon? I’m guessing pretty high, and I’m guessing that Onesimus lost his spit, too! If I know that Paige Hudson likes Bob the quarterback of the Bears, Epaphras recognized Philemon’s slave in Rome!
But it gets worse for Onesimus! He met a third pastor in Rome named Tychicus. Paul wrote the Colossians to say, “Tychichus is coming back with Onesimus, our faithful and dear brother” (Colosians 4:7).
So, the whole church knows about Onesimus running away, Epaphras showing up in Rome, and Paul appealing to Philemon to extend grace and forgive his runaway slave.
II. The Setting
Write down the word slavery. Slavery in the first century was very different than slavery in America prior to the Civil War. I’m not defending slavery! But I am saying that Roman slavery was not as abusive, degrading or sub-human as American slavery.
We know that because of Edward Gibbon who wrote The Decline & Fall of the Roman Empire. In his book he reveals the nature of Roman slavery. For example …
1. Slaves accounted for about 85% of Rome’s population.
2. Roman slavery was not based on ethnicity.
3. They were educated: doctors … teachers … architects … artists … philosophers … writers.
Slavery was a career choice. The educated sold themselves to learn a trade or to go into business.
Slavery was a way out of poverty for the average Roman.
While slaving away, they earned wages and saved their money. Normally, slavery lasted no more than seven years. Under Roman law, slaves had to be freed by age 30. And for the disciplined, they could buy out of slavery early.
Do you see the difference? Now that you know about first century slavery, think about Onesimus. If slavery was voluntary, why run away? Onesimus didn’t steal in order to flee; he fled because he had stolen from his master!
Let me take you on a quick tour of Pompeii. In your mind’s eye you can see Mt. Vesuvius in the distance. On August 4, 79 AD, Mt. Vesuvius erupted, burying everything and everybody in Pompeii. It spewed molten rock and pulverized pumice at a rate 100,000 times greater than the thermal energy of Hiroshima.
The only surviving eyewitness account of the event consists of two letters by Pliny the Younger to the historian Tacitus. Over time the ash hardened. When the bodies decomposed, air pockets were left.
Archaeologists filled those air pockets with plaster, allowing us to see their reaction as they died.
There are all kinds of images available on the internet. I found one of a guy who seems to be praying, another of a mother and child lying together, and one of a slave. We know he’s a slave because he wearing a common slave belt.
Having sold ourselves into the slavery of sin, we’ve all stolen and run from the Master. We are all God’s Onesimus! And when Jesus Christ reconciles us to the Father, we are no longer slaves, but sons and daughters!
You believe that, right? Every Christian has a before and after story, and each of us needs to be willing to share that story with friends, neighbors and family.
III. The Book
1st, Paul’s Commendation. Paul begins this letter like he begins most:
4 I thank God as I pray for you, 5 because I hear about your love for all of his people and your faith in the Lord.
6 I pray that your partnership with us may be effective in deepening your understanding of the things we share for the sake of Christ.
7 Your love has given me great joy and encourage- ment, because you have refreshed the hearts of the Lord’s people.
Notice the good things Paul recognized about Philemon:
1. He loved people …
2. He had a great faith that he shared with others …
3. He supported Paul financially …
4. He encouraged other believers.
Vs. 7 (NIV) says, “You have refreshed the hearts of God’s people.” I can’t remember who said it, but I heard once that there are two kinds of people in the world: you are either a balcony person, or a basement person. People either run toward you, or away from you. And people ran toward Philemon!
Please don’t gloss over Paul’s approach. He doesn’t start the conversation w/a confrontation; he starts with a compliment. That’s good advice for parents, teachers and for bosses. Whenever correction is needed, it helps to recognize the positives before discussing the negatives. Mary Poppins once sang, “A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down!”
2nd, Paul’s Request: Verse 8 begins with the word, “… therefore.” Whenever you see that word you need to ask, “What’s it there for?”
Because you love people and embrace a deep faith, because of who you are:
8 Therefore, although in Christ I could be bold and order you to do what you ought to do,
9 yet I prefer to appeal to you on the basis of love.
10 I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, who became my son while I was in chains.
11 Formerly he was useless to you, but now he has become useful both to you and to me.
Several observations jump out at you:
1. Paul could have ordered – but he appealed.
2. He refers to Onesimus as his son in the faith.
3. There’s a play on words.
Paul uses the same root word twice in vs. 11 for the words, “useless” – and “useful.” Onesimus willingly sold himself to Philemon but he made himself useless! But there’s been a change of heart! With Jesus Christ in his heart, suddenly he is useful!
So what was Paul’s request to Philemon?
17 So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me.
Last December, a high school student from Russiaville made the national news. He donated a pint of blood sponsored by the Colts’ cheerleaders. Afterwards, he and a friend posed for a picture with two of the cheerleaders.
When he left, he posted that picture on snapchat with this tag: “Of course (name of friend) put me next to the African-American cheerleader.” But he didn’t write “African-American,” he used the N-word!
A screengrab of the photo was posted on Facebook and the picture went viral! That student immediately apologized, but it was too late. His friends (Western HS) didn’t think it was very funny. And then he was the unwanted recipient of threats. That’s when his principal, Rick Davis, intervened.
Davis contacted the Colts and they arranged for the cheerleader (who graduated from Crawfordsville High School), to meet with the student and his mother. He brought flowers! He offered the sincerest apology of his life. And Leanna, who is Christian, hugged him!
Then she addressed the media:
“I hope that people look at themselves and realize everybody makes mistakes; nobody’s perfect. Kids make silly mistakes because they’ve grown up with technology at their fingertips. If it had to be somebody, I’m glad it was me.”
Like Joseph when he discovered that Mary was pregnant, Onesimus had options. Under Roman Law, Philemon could’ve had Onesimus put to death!
So Paul appealed for reconciliation. By faith, Onesimus returned to his master. By faith, Paul appealed to Philemon’s better angels. And vs. 11 reads, “He was useless to you, but now he has become useful to both of us!”
Paul was asking Philemon to do three things: to accept back, forgive and restore his runaway slave. Vs. 17, “Welcome him as you would welcome me.” This is the only time in the Bible this word is used, and it’s as rare as the act of complete forgiveness.
If someone has offended you, your Biblical responsibility is to forgive: to accept back, forgive and restore. That’s hard – even for Christians!
Melvin Newland preaches at the Ridge Chapel CC in Kansas, OK. He tells about an incident that took place at a Golden Coral. A server accidentally dumped two gallons of thousand island dressing on a customer.
There stood a guy in a brand new suit wearing salad dressing on almost every inch of his once beautiful suit. The server apologized immediately, but the man went postal! He shouted! He cursed! He demanded to see the manager!
The server ran to get the manager and it didn’t take long for him to make an appearance. So picture this: here’s a guy wearing a brand new suit, but that new suit is covered with thousand island dressing. The manager walks up and asks, “Is there a problem?”
I’m fairly certain that didn’t settle the man down. He demanded to be reimbursed the price of a new suit and he set the price at $300. The manager wrote a check on the spot.
Question: who wears a suit on Sundays? Golfers? Fishermen? Mechanics? Something tells me that he’d been to church but he didn’t know the first thing about practicing forgiveness.
3rd, Paul’s Promise:
18 If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me. 19 I will pay it back.
What does that sound like? Sounds like the Parable of the Good Samaritan!
IV. The Application
Everybody here knows what we ought to do, right? Ray Stedman tells about a friend who needed to forgive someone who had wounded him. He said to Stedman, “I’ve been a Christian for years, but I just can’t forgive him!”
Can’t? Or won’t?
Listen to the words of Jesus found in Matthew 6:
14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
There’s one more verse that needs highlighting:
21 Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I ask.
So what happened between Philemon/Onesimus? No one knows for sure, but an early bishop named Ignatius wrote a letter to the Ephesian church. He addressed that letter to their pastor who went by a slave name: Onesimus. Our once run away slave was now the pastor of the church in Ephesus!
