Mark 2:7-11 (Wey) "Why does this man use such words?" they said; "He is blaspheming. Who can pardon sins but One--that is, God?"... Jesus asked them, "Which is easier?--to say to this paralytic, 'Your sins are pardoned,' or to say, 'Rise, take up your mat, and walk?' But that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to pardon sins"--He turned to the paralytic, and said, "To you I say, 'Rise, take up your mat and go home.'"
Conditional Forgiveness
Mat 6:12 (TEB) "Forgive us the wrongs that we have done, as we forgive the wrongs others have done us."
Luke 6:37 (NIV) "...Forgive, and you will be forgiven."
Mat 6:14-15 (NIV) "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But, if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."
• Assuming the teaching of Mat 6:15 and other such verses is understood and acknowledged as true, rather than emphasize the need to forgive in this Bible study--i.e., the law--we will instead look at five cheap substitutes or impediments to forgiveness, and then at what real forgiveness is, how to attain it, and how to remain in it. And we may find that forgiveness is more difficult, and more easy, than we first thought.
Sin Is Only Human...
• What is natural to "the flesh" (the carnal nature) when we have been hurt or abused or insulted is to strike back, to plot revenge, or to simmer in bitterness. This is "only human". But God requires forgiveness, else He will NOT forgive us. If we are unwilling--or unable--to forgive, then there is no use asking God for what He has told us He will not give. For believers, dealing with the sin of unforgiveness is first priority.
Mark 11:25 (NIV) "And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."
• As a way to test the veracity of the following points, let us consider forgiveness in the most radical sense we can. Think of something truly wicked that has been done to you or someone you love, not by accident or error but deliberately and with malice--where you have come right up against evil and the pain caused by it in your own emotions.
1) What Forgiveness Is Not: Play Acting For Show...
• Remember when as a child you were forced by some adult to "forgive" someone who was first forced to "say sorry" to you? Is this really repentance by the perpetrator... or forgiveness by the victim? Well, perhaps so--in a few rare cases. But let us be honest and acknowledge that this charade by children is more often a temporary cessation of hostilities for the sake of the grown-ups, with the full intent to do more of the same violence (and not get caught) and/or get revenge later--when beyond the adult's watchful eye.
• Adults force children through this ritual because strife in a family or group of kids is an unbearable pain; and they want to teach. Play-acting does give at least a temporary reprieve. But God's pain is more acute when He sees our strife with each other, and His solution aims a little deeper than mere words or mimicry or delay or coating over. For He is aiming not at hypocritical play-acting, but at truth from the inside out.
• This childish pantomime of "forgiveness" often carries into adulthood as a superficial substitute for the real thing. We think by "saying so", it is so. But is God fooled by such? Is there ever a place where we can escape His penetrating gaze? Does He not see the secret meditation of revenge or the bitter hatred behind the nice smile? Since when is He impressed with mere words when hearts do not match?
Mark 7:6 (Phi) Jesus replied, "You hypocrites, Isaiah described you beautifully when he wrote: 'These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.' These teachings are but rules made by men."
2) Is Denial Forgiveness?
• The inability to really forgive is often due to a false concept that "forgetting is forgiving". Forgetting is NOT forgiving. To be sure, if we forgive we will forget as a result. But the reverse is not true: forgetting is not forgiving--it is denial.
Ps 51:6 (NAS) Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being...
• If we attempt to achieve a bogus forgiveness by deliberately putting "out of mind" the offense, we might be fooling ourselves and others that we have "forgiven". But all of the emotions and plots and hurt are still there--only held back by force of will in deliberated denial. But then we see "that person" again and all the bitterness and pain rise up again within us. Or, in the off moment--when such mental gymnastics cannot be maintained--we catch ourselves in an elaborate meditation of revenge or fit of rage and anger. Then we see just how deep and effective this sort of "forgiveness" is.
• A mind "bent" by denial has a nasty habit of "snapping back" in the worst of moments.
1 Jn 2:9 (Wey) Any one who professes to be in the light and yet hates his brother is still in darkness.
• Denial is merely a delusion: flimsy, fake, and shallow. Forgiveness is real: robust and solid and deep. It is not an avoiding of the truth, but a dealing with it squarely, however painful.
• Consider God's perspective. Nothing is hidden from His sight: the evil intent, the hidden lust, the damage done, the choosing of that which is wrong, etc. And yet He is the author and originator of forgiveness. If we are going to really forgive, we are going to have to do it His way: with our eyes open.
• For those God chooses to forgive, He will "forget" their sins, "remembering them no more". But let us not accuse the omniscient God of not knowing something or of being ignorant of any fact. He has told us that nothing is beyond His sight. Rather let us understand the "figure of speech" and spiritual dynamic of how God forgives.
Heb 8:12 (NIV) "For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more."
• The order here is essential. Forgiveness first, forgetting second. Until real forgiveness takes place, the offense is "in our faces" as regards that person, and it is the same with God. The sin comes between us, and cannot be "forgotten" until dealt with. If and when we enter into true forgiveness, we can then regard the person without the "offense" looming first and foremost between us.
Isa 43:25 (NIV) "I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more."
3) Impediments To Forgiveness: The Lure Of Sin
• Another impediment to forgiveness is that bitterness, revenge, hatred, etc. have a perverted sort of appeal. Who has not felt the intoxicating lure of a grandiose meditation of scorching retribution? While we know this is wrong, it sure is great fun in the moment to fondle such thoughts.
Eph 4:26-27,31 (NIV) "In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold... Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.
4) Vengeance Is The Lord's... But Only If He Acts As My Agent?
Rom 12:19 (NIV) Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord.
• Surely God has more power to pour wrath on our enemies than we do, and He surely sees the evil done all to clearly. So the thought may strike us to let Him do the dirty work. But when we think this through, it may not turn out as the carnal man within us might like. For let us face the plain fact that God has this habit of forgiving people and extending great mercy, at least for the time being.
• So... we may not see fire from heaven come down to consume those we wish would receive God's vengeance. It is not that He is letting them off by some magic or deflection of mind, it is just that He may take the painful punishment Himself.
Prov 24:17 (NAS) Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, and do not let your heart be glad when he stumbles.
Mat 5:44-45 (NEB) "But what I tell you is this: love your enemies and pray for your persecutors; only so can you be like children of your heavenly Father, who makes his sun rise on good and bad alike, and sends the rain on the honest and the dishonest. If you love only those who love you, what reward can you expect? Surely the tax-gatherers do as much as that. And if you greet only your brothers, what is there extraordinary about that? Even the heathen do as much. There must be no limit to your goodness, as your heavenly Father's goodness knows no bounds."
• Let us "count the cost" of letting God deal with our "enemies". He may bless them, prosper them, and save their eternal souls, rather than strike them dead with a lightning bolt. For this is what God is like, and what He is "up to" just now. And this may not satisfy our sense of what should happen. If we "let go and let God", He may well forgive and bless and love those we have plotted against and smoldered in hatred for, and even give us this same "foolish" (1 Cor 1:25) mindset.
Luke 17:3-5 (Phi) "So be careful how you live. If your brother offends you, take him to task about it, and if he is sorry, forgive him. Yes, if he wrongs you seven times in one day and turns to you and says, 'I am sorry' seven times, you must forgive him. And the apostles said to the Lord, 'give us more faith.'"
5) Is Real Forgiveness Humanly Possible?
• It has been said, "To err is human, to forgive divine." There is a truth in this.
Luke 7:49 (GLT) And those reclining with Him began to say within themselves, "Who is this who even forgives sins?"
• For what "seems right to a man" (Prov 16:25) is revenge. If the offense is not avenged, will not the perpetrator be sanctioned in his behavior to do more of the same? What about justice and fairness? Does forgiveness even "work" at a mere human level? What would happen to our society if everyone REALLY did this? Is "loving our enemies" something that appeals to our sensibilities? Does it even make any sense to the natural man?
Which Is Easier?
• Perhaps the greatest impediment to forgiveness is the idea that we could actually do it on our own, that it is a human quality. Consider that we are as capable, and likely, to supernaturally heal someone in our own strength... as to be able to forgive them. For which is easier?
Mat 9:5-6 (NIV) Which is easier: to say, 'Your sins are forgiven,' or to say, 'Get up and walk'? But so that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins..." Then he said to the paralytic, "Get up, take your mat and go home."
