When Honoring Your Father Has an Impact
Genesis 50 - Father’s Day 2016
Turn with me this morning to the first book of the Bible, the book of Genesis, chapter 49. Today is Father’s Day, and it is a day that we think about honoring fathers. I think for the most part we do a pretty good job of honoring our fathers when we are young. We draw pictures for dad’s office - we make hand-painted ties with little hand prints on them - we make cardboard pencil holders - or if your child is creative like Joy - you get little giraffe swimming pools. But as we become adults and have our own families, it can become harder to honor our fathers, especially when they age. Often our aging parents frustrate us or they do things to irritate us.
Today, as we look at the scriptures, we want to see a beautiful picture of honoring an aging parent in the example of Joseph here in the end of the book of Genesis. I’ll be reading today from the NIV, and I’ll begin at 49:29. Read 49:29 - 50:14 PRAY.
How far will you go to honor your father? In Joseph’s case, it was about 1,000 miles and a couple months of his life just for the funeral! In our culture we often take 5 minutes once a year on Father’s Day to call up dad, wish him a happy Father’s Day, and think we have done justice to the command of God to honor our father. But that 5 minute phonecall falls FAR short of what we should be doing.
Father’s Day is really a day to remind ourselves of what we should be doing 365 days a year. God calls us to live a life of honoring our fathers. The fifth of the 10 commandments tells us “Honor your father and mother”-- and Paul elaborates on it in Ephesians where he says --which is the first commandment with a promise--“that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” Of the 10 commandments, this is the only one that has a promise - if you honor your father, God will bless you! If you wonder why things aren’t going as well for you as you would like - you might want to pause and reflect on the question, “How well am I doing at honoring my father?”
So, to learn about honoring our fathers, we want to look at the example of Joseph. A few of these ideas I’ve shared before in the past - but then we’re going to add a few more layers to our understanding. First, on the basic level, the ground level of the story, when we simply look at Joseph’s actions, what does he teach us? First,
I. He Honors His Father In Life - Turn back to chapter 46 if you would. Here we find the account when Joseph brings Jacob his father down to Egypt in the second year of the famine. Joseph is 39 at the time; his father Jacob is 130. How does Joseph honor his father?
* Joseph provides Comfortable Care -
- he provides good housing - 46:31 - Then Joseph said to his brothers and to his father’s household, “I will go up and speak to Pharaoh and will say to him, ‘My brothers and my father’s household, who were living in the land of Canaan, have come to me. The men are shepherds; they tend livestock, and they have brought along their flocks and herds and everything they own.’ When Pharaoh calls you in and asks, ‘What is your occupation?’ you should answer, ‘Your servants have tended livestock from our boyhood on, just as our fathers did.’ Then you will be allowed to settle in the region of Goshen, for all shepherds are detestable to the Egyptians.”
47:5 - Pharaoh said to Joseph, “Your father and your brothers have come to you, and the land of Egypt is before you; settle your father and your brothers in the best part of the land. Let them live in Goshen.
Joseph sees to it that his father is given the best part of the land for his home.
- he provides for his father’s transportation - 46:5 - Then Jacob left Beersheba, and Israel’s sons took their father Jacob and their children and their wives in the carts that Pharaoh had sent to transport him. Joseph and his brothers make sure their father is transported safely.
- he provides for his father’s surroundings - 46:6 - They also took with them their livestock and the possessions they had acquired in Canaan, and Jacob and all his offspring went to Egypt. As Jacob is relocated, Joseph makes sure his father is able to bring along the things that are precious and meaningful to him.
Joseph provides comfortable care for his aging father. He also
II. He honors his father in his death - turn over to chapter 50 to see this. How does Joseph show honor once his father is dead?
• He doesn’t withhold emotion - 50:1 - Joseph threw himself upon his father and wept over him and kissed him. When his father Jacob finally dies, Joseph, 57 at the time, weeps openly and strongly. Mourning is a way of showing honor. In fact, the Jewish culture had an established system of mourning. It was often accompanied by dressing in burlap, called sackcloth, by weeping, fasting, ripping one’s garments. But in our culture we want to “get over it” as fast as possible, because often people are uncomfortable being around someone who is grieving, who is in mourning. Mourning is actually a way of showing honor.
There was a day in our society, granted, it was a generation or two ago, when those who lost a loved one dressed in black or work a black arm band. Look in 50:3 - And the Egyptians mourned for him seventy days. Two and a half months of mourning. After 2 and a half HOURS we expect the person to move on! Now look down in 50:10 - When they reached the threshing-floor of Atad, near the Jordan, they lamented loudly and bitterly; and there Joseph observed a seven-day period of mourning for his father. After 2.5 months of mourning, they have the funeral. And as they do, they take ANOTHER week to mourn the death of Jacob. Joseph doesn’t rush his father’s funeral ceremony. Our society is so different - I saw there is a funeral home in Saginaw that has a “drive through” viewing - you pull up to a window, a curtain opens and you see the body, and after you pull away or three minutes later the curtain closes again - and THAT is how you are supposed to “pay your respects” to the deceased.
• He embraces ceremony - 50:2 - Then Joseph directed the physicians in his service to embalm his father Israel. So the physicians embalmed him, taking a full forty days, for that was the time required for embalming. What this is literally saying is they made a Mummy out of Jacob! Somewhere in the Middle East there is a sarcophagus with a mummy inside that is Jacob’s remains. It was a special process reserved for the Pharaohs and the elite of society. And I’m sure it didn’t come cheap!
What do we hear today - “just bury me in a pine box” - pick the cheapest coffin - save your money and just cremate me. But Joseph doesn’t cut costs to provide a funeral to honor his father. We see the same thing in the life of Jesus. Remember the story in Mark 14 of the woman who comes with the alabaster box of perfume to pour on Jesus, anointing him for his funeral. It could have sold for a year’s wages - in our day today $40K - $60K. And she poured it out as a way of honoring Jesus.
Joseph embraces ceremony as a way of honoring his father. Then look in 50:7
• He involves others in the ceremony - So Joseph went up to bury his father. All Pharaoh’s officials accompanied him--the dignitaries of his court and all the dignitaries of Egypt— besides all the members of Joseph’s household and his brothers and those belonging to his father’s household. Joseph doesn’t grieve privately, but he brings together a great ceremony to honor his father Jacob. The next thing he does:
• He follows through on commitments - Joseph made some commitments to his father before he died. It can be easy once your father is dead to disregard all those commitments. But not Joseph! 50:12 -
So Jacob’s sons did as he had commanded them: They carried him to the land of Canaan and buried him in the cave in the field of Machpelah, near Mamre, which Abraham had bought as a burial place from Ephron the Hittite, along with the field.
Jacob told Joseph what he wanted done - and Joseph followed through. He honored his father by fulfilling his father’s wishes. And then
• He goes on with his life! 50:14 - After burying his father, Joseph returned to Egypt, together with his brothers and all the others who had gone with him to bury his father. After the three months of mourning and embalming and traveling and ceremony, Joseph goes back to Egypt and goes on with his life.
So this is the basic lesson we learn about honoring our fathers. I could pray, say a benediction, and we would be good to go. But I want to take this to another level this morning. You’ve seen those pictures that when you first look at them you see one thing - an old lady or a rabbit - but the longer you stare, you see a young lady or a bird. We’ve looked at the basic level of Joseph honoring his father, but let’s look at a deeper level of honor. Joseph also teaches us about honoring our fathers through a
• Commitment of Identification - Look with me over in 47:29 - When the time drew near for Israel to die, he called for his son Joseph and said to him, “If I have found favor in your eyes, put your hand under my thigh — now THERE’S a unique way to give a promise - no shaking on it, it’s grab a thigh! — and promise that you will show me kindness and faithfulness. Do not bury me in Egypt, but when I rest with my fathers, carry me out of Egypt and bury me where they are buried.” “I will do as you say,” he said. “Swear to me,” he said. Then Joseph swore to him, and Israel worshipped as he leaned on the top of his staff.
Think about this - Jacob is 147 years old - and he calls his son Joseph to him to talk about his death. Joseph is the son who has been his favored son, the one with the coat of many colors - the technicolor dreamcoat, if you will - I love that musical - Joseph is the second in charge, the one who is above his brothers. And after all Joseph has done in bringing his father to Egypt, moving the family, giving them the best land, and caring for them for the last 17 years, — if Jacob had any doubts about his son’s love, they should have vanished long ago - but in spite of all this, when Jacob asks Joseph to bury him in Canaan, Joseph says “Yes, I’ll do it” - notice Jacob says SWEAR to me! If we were Jacob, Joseph says I’ll do it - we say Thanks! I knew I could count on you. But not Jacob, he says SWEAR to me! Why does he make Joseph swear? Why isn’t his word good enough? There is something deeper going on. And I’ll share my thought of what it is in just a minute. But notice the next thing that happens. Joseph swears, and Jacob, also called by the nickname of Israel, worships on the top of his staff, or as some translations say, bows in worship at the head of his bed. Jacob is almost blind, largely bed-ridden, after all, he’s 147 years old! But when Joseph swears he will bury him in Canaan in the family grave plot, Jacob worships. I can picture him kneeling on his bed as he praises God.
Why does Jacob worship? Because it is at THIS point that he sees that Joseph is choosing to honor HIM, Jacob, as his father. Was there ever a question about this? Evidently there was. Because if you look at the moment Jacob dies, what takes place? Joseph weeps, and then you’d think if he hadn’t already talked to Pharaoh that he’d go to Pharaoh, get permission to leave for the funeral, and take his father back to Canaan. But NO, that’s NOT what happens.
The first thing that Joseph does is to embalm his father. They make a mummy out of him. Let’s remember that this is NOT something that Jews do - this is an Egyptian custom. Egyptians viewed the dead body as the vehicle to take you to some other world beyond our own. And now, consider what it was that Jacob wanted done to his body. He wanted it buried in the earth - he wanted it to go back to the dust of the ground. Think about it: Burial and embalming, they aren’t just two different ways of relating to a corpse – they are exact opposite ways of relating to a corpse. Burial, the Israelite custom, facilitates the body’s return to dust. As the OT states: You are dust, and to dust you shall return! (Genesis 3:19). Egyptians, then, would be horrified at the notion of burying one of their royalty. Why would you do such a thing? You are destroying his vehicle to the afterlife!
So the first thing Joseph does is embalm his father. Following the 40 days of grieving and embalming, there follow 30 more days of grieving - not just by Joseph, but by ALL Egypt! Joseph is a favored son - and so his father is a loved figure in Egypt. His burial was going to be a state funeral - full of pomp and circumstance. So how do you think Pharaoh would respond if Joseph said, we’re going to bury the body - and we’re going to bury it in this little backwater spot in Canaan.
But during those 30 extra days, Joseph still says nothing. Only after the 70 days are up does Joseph go to Pharaoh - and then he goes the round about way. He tries to avoid a direct confrontation. Look at verse 4 - When the days of mourning had passed, Joseph said to Pharaoh’s court, “If I have found favor in your eyes, speak to Pharaoh for me. Tell him, ‘My father made me swear an oath and said, “I am about to die; bury me in the tomb I dug for myself in the land of Canaan.” Now let me go up and bury my father; then I will return.’” What’s going on here? Joseph is trying to keep from ruffling any feathers - he wants to take the least confrontational approach possible. He pleads with his friends in court, and then says “tell Pharaoh I’m doing this because I promised my father. Why does he do this?
Because in reality Pharaoh has become a father to Joseph. Joseph, remember, had been kidnapped and sold off as a slave to Egypt when he was a mere 17 years old. There, in that foreign land, he had languished in prison for many long years until suddenly, a surprise benefactor pulled him out of the dungeon, asking if he perhaps knew how to interpret some dreams. That man was Pharaoh.
After Joseph successfully interpreted those dreams, not only did Pharaoh make Joseph’s life dramatically better than it had been before – he made it better in certain, crucial ways. He gave him a wife. He gave him a new name. He gave him a job. What kind of person helps you find a wife, gives you a name, and can give you a job in the family business? A father does those things for you.
And speaking of a father, let’s talk about how Pharaoh first gets to know Joseph. What was their topic of conversation? Could you interpret my dreams please? What was the last topic of conversation Joseph discussed with his own father? It was his own dreams and their meaning. Jacob had angrily denounced the implication of Joseph’s dreams about the sun and moon and stars bowing to him. It seemed as if Joseph was thinking he would have a kind of ultimate power. But now, a new kind of father would come on the scene and, in another conversation about dreams, that new father would be so enthralled with Joseph that he would in fact gift him the very power that Joseph had once dreamed about. He would make his dreams come true! He would make Joseph second in charge to the most powerful person in the world.
Second in charge…. this is the same position in Pharaoh’s household that he had occupied at home. He was second in charge to his father. Now, in Egypt, he has a new father, Pharaoh. It seems like Joseph really did have a father-son relationship going with Pharaoh. Which is all fine and well. Except that Joseph, of course, has a real father, too. And eventually, that real father, Jacob, shows up in Egypt, and re-enters Joseph’s life. So, for Joseph, everything is fine as long as the interests of those two men – those two fathers – Jacob and Pharaoh, aligned with one another. But what would happen if they ever didn’t? That’s what happens when it comes time for the funeral. And that’s why Jacob has Joseph swear - not because he doubts his son’s intentions, but because he knows the position he is putting Joseph in, in taking a stand for Jacob’s wishes instead of the plans of Egypt.
So in Joseph we also see a commitment of identification - Joseph chooses to hold fast to the culture, beliefs, and heritage of his true family, even though he is so ingrained in the culture of Egypt. He tries to make it easy for Pharaoh, he tells about his oath to his father, and then he says I’ll return. Pharaoh agrees to the funeral trip, and we might think that is the end. But it is FAR from over. Look at 50:7 - So Joseph went up to bury his father. All Pharaoh’s officials accompanied him--the dignitaries of his court and all the dignitaries of Egypt— besides all the members of Joseph’s household and his brothers and those belonging to his father’s household. Only their children and their flocks and herds were left in Goshen. Chariots and horsemen also went up with him. It was a very large company.
So all the officials of Egypt come in procession for this funeral march. I saw on the news last week the official birthday of Queen Elizabeth - it’s called the Trouping of the Color - and they have a massive parade bringing out all the royal troops in all their decorative garb to celebrate. That’s what they did for Jacob. They even bring the chariots and archers - an honor guard to accompany them. In verse 11 we see the Canaanites looking on.
The story of Jacob’s burial, in the end, is the story of two heroes. The first is Joseph. Joseph risked everything to bury his father according to his wishes. He risked the loss of power, prestige, and perhaps most of all, his good standing in the eyes of his adopted father, Pharaoh. But the second hero, unlikely as it may seem, is Pharaoh himself. He resisted the urge to impose upon the venerated Jacob an exclusively Egyptian identity. He allowed Jacob to be who he was – Israelite, not Egyptian – and still, he and the populace would cherish him; still, he and Egypt would regard Jacob as royalty. They would accord him all the honor of a king, a national father, notwithstanding Jacob’s rather public decision that Canaan was his true home.The humility evinced by Pharaoh’s stance is nothing short of remarkable.
So not let me bring in one other aspect of the story:
• Honoring our Fathers Gives a Witness - there is one other time we see an exodus from Egypt - hundreds of years later when Moses leads the Jews out of captivity. And there are some amazing parallels there that I won’t get in to today: if you want more information, I can refer you to some excellent resources. In both exodus accounts - the funeral and the deliverance, we see details about the children and the animals - when Moses first comes and asks to go worship, they discuss the children and animals - in both accounts they take a similar route - they don’t go straight up to Egypt, but they travel around the bottom of the Sinai peninsula and enter Israel from the East - that’s the significance of the location in verse 10 - in both accounts the Canaanites are watching the events. In many ways, the burial of Jacob sets a pattern for Moses’s Pharaoh to follow. Joseph’s Pharaoh humbles himself and acknowledges that Joseph has another father, a higher allegiance, and he allows Joseph to leave and sends an honor guard to accompany him. Moses’s Pharaoh resists the call to let the Jews leave and worship for three days.
If you remember in the Exodus account, Moses doesn’t declare that he wants to take all the Jews away from Egypt - he simply asks for permission to go into the desert for three days to worship God - Exodus 5:1. If Pharaoh said yes, would Moses have run away with all the Jews when they were in the desert — or is there another possibility, that if Pharaoh had humbled himself, and agreed to the three days to worship God, that God would have continued to work on Pharaoh’s heart to bring the nation of Egypt to a place of following Him, the one true God.
After all, God’s desire is not to destroy Egyptians, but that the Egyptians might be saved. Peter reminds us, God is not willing that any should perish. One day in the future when Christ sets up his kingdom on the earth, Egypt will worship the Lord. Isaiah 19 says, In that day there will be an altar to the LORD in the heart of Egypt, and a monument to the LORD at its border. It will be a sign and witness to the LORD Almighty in the land of Egypt. When they cry out to the LORD because of their oppressors, he will send them a savior and defender, and he will rescue them. So the LORD will make himself known to the Egyptians, and in that day they will acknowledge the LORD. They will worship with sacrifices and grain offerings; they will make vows to the LORD and keep them.
So on a deeper level, the faithfulness of Joseph in honoring his earthly father Jacob, was also a way of honoring his heavenly Father, and was a faithful witness to Pharaoh, which also set an example for others for years to come. And in the same way, when we honor our earthly fathers, it sets an example that points others worship the Lord. As Jesus says in the sermon on the mount, In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven. May God help us to do that this week. May God help us as we honor our fathers. Let’s pray.
