Starving Sons
Dying to Self, Part 2
(Vineyard Pen)
If you have your bible, turn to Genesis chapter 25.
We’re continuing our series,
based on the life of Jacob.
Last week we talked about letting go
of who we think we’re supposed to be,
so we can become who God created us to be.
Lets read the story we’re looking at today.
Gen 25:24-34
24 When the time came for her (its talking about the mother, Rebekah) to give birth, there were twin boys in her womb. 25 The first to come out was red, and his whole body was like a hairy garment;
Now, imagine you show up at the maternity ward,
and your wife or daughter just had a baby boy,
and they want to show you how precious he is,
and they hand you the baby all wrapped up in the blanket,
and he’s so cute,
but when you fold back the blanket,
it looks like a little gorilla, its whole body is hairy.
Wouldn’t that be kinda weird.
It’s a little chewbakka baby.
so they named him Esau. 26 After this, his brother came out, with his hand grasping Esau's heel;
We learned last week that the name Jacob means
“heel-grabber” or deceiver.
so he was named Jacob. Isaac was sixty years old when Rebekah gave birth to them.
27 The boys grew up, and Esau became a skillful hunter, a man of the open country, while Jacob was content to stay at home among the tents.
28 Isaac, who had a taste for wild game, loved Esau, but Rebekah loved Jacob.
29 Once when Jacob was cooking some stew, Esau came in from the open country, famished. 30 He said to Jacob, "Quick, let me have some of that red stew! I'm famished!" (That is why he was also called Edom.)
31 Jacob replied, "First sell me your birthright."
32 "Look, I am about to die," Esau said. "What good is the birthright to me?"
33 But Jacob said, "Swear to me first." So he swore an oath to him, selling his birthright to Jacob.
34 Then Jacob gave Esau some bread and some lentil stew. He ate and drank, and then got up and left.
So Esau despised his birthright.
This has to be the worst negotiation
in the history of the world.
Because Esau’s birthright meant that
when the dad, Isaac, passed away,
Esau would get double the inheritance
that Jacob would get.
Now some of you might say,
What’s the big deal about that?
If I got double my parents inheritance,
it would still be zero.
Two times zero is zero.
But Jacob and Esau’s parents were loaded.
They were wealthy.
So this was a big deal,
Esau made a really bad trade,
the double inheritance,
for a bowl of lentil bean stew.
Let me illustrate this for you.
Who in here has a really nice car…
This is not a trick question,
whose got an expensive car that the rest of us might lust after.
Don’t raise your hand if you’ve got a Ford Taurus,
it might be nice to you,
We’re not gonna make fun of you, I promise.
You won’t go to hell if you have a really nice car,
you just might get to heaven faster.
“How would you like to trade this Vineyard pen, for your _______?
Yeah, you’re like, no way,
I steal the pens every week anyway.
I don’t need to trade for it.
That would be a really bad trade wouldn’t it?
That’s what Esau did,
he made a really bad trade.
In fact it was so bad,
its hard for us to believe this story would even be true,
why would anyone ever do that,
why would anyone make such a bad trade.
But then you realize that people all around us,
are making horrible trades every day.
In fact many of us in this room
have made some really bad trades,
and some point in your life.
So I want to look at several lessons from this story.
Here’s the first lesson, if you’re taking notes.
Beware of mistaking growth for maturity.
Verse 27 it says…
The boys grew up,
Now I know this is talking about,
they grew in age and grew up physically.
But even though they grew physically,
we watch them in this story fight like 5 year olds.
Can I have some soup?
No I’m not sharing, go get your own.
If you want some of mine, you gotta gimme your birthright.
I’m about to die of hunger, and I want it right now,
so who cares about a birthright.
The bible says they grew up,
but did they really?
You and I meet people everyday,
and they look grown up,
but are they really?
I have a hard time watching reality shows,
because they look grown up,
but they act like 5 year olds.
My kids by the time they got to 5th grade
had more maturity
then most of the people on TV.
Anybody here know some people
that have grown up,
but they haven’t really grown up?
Okay, quit looking at your husband…
It says, the boys grew up
and Esau became a skillful hunter, a man of the open country
so he got really good at killing his dinner,
but he never got good at controlling his appetite.
Don’t mistake growth for maturity.
and Don’t mistake age for wisdom.
There are some of you here
that are really good at making money,
you’ve developed that skill,
just like Esau developed the skill to hunt.
you’re good at making money
but you’ve never learned to manage it,
so you’ve made some bad decisions,
and you never have enough.
Some you are really good at making friends,
but you can’t keep a friend.
Why?
You know how to hunt em and bring em home,
but you don’t know how to return phone calls,
and be faithful in a relationship,
So don’t mistake external growth for inward maturity.
In fact,
why don’t you turn to the person next to you and ask,
did you really grow up?
I mean, really?
Going on with our story,
it says,
…while Jacob was content to stay at home among the tents.
We talked last week about how he was the momma’s boy.
28 Isaac, who had a taste for wild game, loved Esau,
Because Esau could hunt and bring him tasty game…
so Isaac is a picture of the selfish father,
who loves one kid more because
he brings home the trophies,
he’s the football star,
he has a lot of accomplishments,
And a selfish father loves a kid more
for what they do,
than for who they are.
But then Jacob had a special relationship with his mom.
But Rebekah loved Jacob.
So mom is like,
Don’t worry Jacob baby,
I know dad likes your brother more,
but that’s just because he’s a buffoon,
he and Esau are both hairy,
and so you and I can stay together,
So Jacob spent more time with her,
and developed indoor skills like cooking.
In Verse 29
Once when Jacob was cooking some stew, Esau came in from the open country, famished.
So Esau was out hunting, and he was a good hunter,
but even good hunters have bad hunting trips,
and he came home empty handed,
and he is hungry.
30 He said to Jacob,
Just a quick note:
be careful who you talk to
when you’re in a weakened state,
when you’re susceptible,
when you’re vulnerable.
Esau is famished, he’s weak with hunger,
and he immediately goes to talk to Jacob,
but Jacob has his own agenda,
he doesn’t have Esau’s best interests at heart.
When you’re weak,
you’ve gotta be careful who you talk to,
because if you reach out to the wrong person,
and hear the wrong voice,
you’ll make the wrong choice every single time.
So Esau says…
"Quick, let me have some of that red stew! I'm famished!"
He says, Quick,
you can hear the impulsiveness in his voice.
I see it, I want it, I gotta have it.
Give it to me now, Quick”
Verse 31
Jacob replied, "First sell me your birthright."
What?
What are talking about, I just want a bowl of beans.
Jacob, you’re being ridiculous.
You know, I read this, and I’m thinking,
Esau, wake up, think about this…
You’re a hunter, you’re hairy, you’re tough,
Jacob is a cook.
Beat him up, and take the stew.
You don’t have to trade him anything.
Take the little momma’s boy,
throw him across the kitchen,
and you take all the stew.
But you see,
Esau is weak, he’s hungry, he’s not thinking straight,
he doesn’t remember his own strength.
So in verse 32,
Notice how Esau turns from a big hairy man,
into a drama queen.
32 "Look, I am about to die," Esau said. "What good is the birthright to me?"
Come on Esau, you’re not about to die.
If you were about to die you couldn’t even stand up,
much less argue with your brother.
But Esau says,
"Look, I am about to die,"
That leads to our next lesson from this story:
Beware of unsatisfied appetites, that become exaggerated emotions.
Unsatisfied appetites can lead to exaggerated emotions.
Because of that,
you need to be very careful that in your life,
you don’t get too hungry.
And in case you haven’t realized it yet,
we’re not talking about food here.
Food is just an example of our other appetites.
We’re really talking about your heart here.
Esau was in trouble because he was hungry,
he was weak because he was hungry,
he compromised because he was hungry,
When I was going through Navy flight school,
one of the requirements before you deployed on a carrier was,
you had to go through Survival school.
The survival school taught you to survive if you got shot down in enemy territory.
The west coast survival school was in San Diego,
and they’d take you out in the California desert for 3 days.
The first day and a half was training,
in living off the land, land navigation, and evading the enemy,
The rest of the time you were actually in a mock Prisoner Of War camp, where they actually used some moderate forms of torture on us, to see if we’d break.
For example, you may have heard of the torture called waterboarding, its become pretty controversial in recent years,
In 2007 news reports came out that the CIA was using waterboarding on certain captives,
But then in 2009 Obama stopped the practice.
Well in my survival school class, they were waterboarding guys, not everyone, and I’m glad I didn’t get it,
but one of my friends did,
so this survival school was not a fun experience,
it was way too realistic to be fun.
PICTURE (right after we got back…)
But the torture wasn’t the worst part,
The worst part was,
they didn’t feed you anything for the whole 3 days.
And you’re hiking around the desert,
doing lots of physical activity, for 3 days,
with no food in your stomach.
And believe me, we were hungry.
We were hungry enough that we’d eat almost anything.
We killed a rattlesnake in our camp,
and we made rattlesnake soup.
We killed a rabbit,
and had to divide it among about 120 guys.
I ate part of the liver, raw, because I was hungry,
and I thought it was good.
If you gave me a raw rabbit liver right now,
I would not eat it.
and I would not think it was good.
But when you’re really hungry,
you’ll compromise,
you’ll do things you wouldn’t normally do.
Any good nutritionist will tell you,
if you need to lose weight,
the worst thing you can do is starve yourself all day.
I want to lose weight,
so I’m gonna skip breakfast,
I’m gonna skip lunch,
well what’s going to happen about 9:30pm,
when from within the refrigerator,
there is a calling,
there is a voice, calling your name,
and its not the broccoli,
it’s the Breyers ice cream.
When you’re hungry and weak,
beware of the quick fix.
And again, we are not really talking about food, are we.
The food is just an analogy to talk about your heart,
to talk about your spiritual condition.
A lot of times the reason that we make bad deals in life,
and bad deals with people,
and bad compromises,
and bad choices and decisions,
is not because we’re bad people,
but because we got too hungry.
We didn’t feed ourself good spiritual food,
so we went after the junk food.
and bad food leads to bad results.
Let me tell you,
There is no excuse for you to be spiritually hungry,
You say, well, I have to work Sundays,
I can’t come to church very often.
We have small groups that meet all through the week,
you can go to our website
and listen to any sermon preached at our church since 2007,
plus there’s all kinds of bible study books you can get,
that will help you read the bible
and study it on your own,
there is an unbelievable amount of good food around,
you can stuff yourself with good food any time you want.
You don’t have to go around starving.
But what happened to Esau happens to us,
you’re walking around feeling empty,
you’re not filled with God’s word,
you’re not filled with worship,
You’re not spending any time with God Monday through Wednesday,
so by the time Thursday comes around,
you’re famished, you’re falling apart,
and then you get into a situation
where you see something you want,
and you suddenly realize how hungry you are,
you’re famished,
in fact, you tell yourself you’re about to die,
and we can laugh at Esau the drama queen,
but we can also all relate, about how
your emotions get exaggerated
when you get too empty.
and then you start looking at people who love you,
and taking offense about what they didn’t give you.
and because you’re so hungry,
you try to get the people around you
to give you something, or be something for you
that only God can be.
And you wonder why it all falls apart.
Maybe you let your relationship with God starve,
and then you get too lonely,
and you feel like you need love
and you’re not getting it from the right places,
Because God is supposed to be
the primary source of love in our lives,
But since you’re not getting your source of love
from God and God’s people,
you’ll go to a bar or club
and get something that looks like love,
and you’ll settle for sex
but what you were hungry for was love.
And you didn’t get love from the right stream,
so now you’re drinking from a polluted pond,
because you went around hungry.
And when you get too hungry,
you start talking yourself into forfeiting your faith.
Its like, I’m about to die,
so what good is my birthright?
I feel for Esau and how he felt,
because sometimes its hard to honor God
who I can’t see,
when I see a bowl of beans in front of me
that I can see,
and that bowl of beans may be a terrible choice,
and maybe in the back of my mind
I know its not the right thing to do,
but if I’m famished
then almost anything smells good,
If you get hungry enough
you’ll start craving things
you’d never even look at.
When I was in that survival school,
about two days into it, they took all 120 of us into the woods,
and told us we had 5 minutes to disappear,
and then the enemy was going to show up,
and try to capture us, and take us to the POW camp.
But, there was a possible reward.
They told us that about a mile away directly east of us was a safe house, and if we made it there without being captured, we got a huge reward --- it was half a peanut butter sandwich.
Normally, I would not be motivated by half a peanut butter sandwich. But I was so hungry, I was dreaming about PB&J.
So we all took off.
and I’m hiding in bushes, crawling behind trees, and guys all around me start getting captured, but I’m still free. And I’m working my way closer and closer to that safe house, I go a half mile, and by this time I can’t hear or see anybody around me, they’ve all been captured, I go about ¾ mile, then a mile, but I don’t see the safe house, I keep going and going, thinking this has got to be over a mile. And then I got captured.
What had happened is my direction was a little off,
and I went right by the safe house and missed it.
Out of our 120 guys, only one made it to the safe house, but I was about the last one captured
And I’m going, oh no, my sandwich,
I’m not gonna get my sandwich,
it was a traumatic loss,
its still painful today…
When you’re hungry enough,
unsatisfied appetites exaggerate your emotions,
and you start feeling like…
well maybe I’m never gonna get married,
maybe nobody’s ever gonna love me,
so since I can’t get real love,
I’ll settle for a temporary fix,
Maybe some of the young women here,
you have a guy who’s trying to persuade you
to do things and go farther…
and he tells you its because he loves you,
And I want to tell you,
walk away from that bowl of beans.
You don’t need that,
it’s not real love at all,
you don’t need a bowl of beans to fill you up,
In fact, for you women here that want to be pure
and know who you are in Christ,
and respect yourself,
the next time some guy tries to push you,
you tell him, boy, you aint nothing but a bowl,
and I don’t eat out of bowls,
I’m a daughter of the king,
and I’m waiting on some fine china
and white linen tablecloths.
You see, when you’re famished, the bowl of beans looks good,
but what a horrible trade you’re making.
“Jacob, I’ll give you my inheritance for a bowl of bean soup.”
Are you kidding?
Now, I could understand if it was extra chunky,
But its bean soup.
Beans for your birthright, it’s a bad deal.
And yet we do it every day.
Our immediate need starts to seem so urgent,
and we start to think we’ll never get that need met,
if we don’t get it right now,
so we make a really bad trade,
and give away our birthright.
Anybody ever been to a Mongolian BBQ restaurant?
Kathy and I go to one called BD’s Mongolian, in Mason,
and the way it works, is they give you a bowl,
and you fill your bowl with anything you want,
then you take it up and they cook if for you.
But see, I know how they work,
they want me to fill my bowl with starches…
fill you up on the cheap stuff…
But I don’t want the cheap stuff,
I’m going straight for the shrimp and beef,
I want to fill my bowl with the good stuff.
Let me tell you,
When your life is empty,
you’ll let people fill your bowl with anything.
Maybe there’s somebody sitting here today,
and you’ve been trading your birthright for a bowl,
or maybe you haven’t done it yet,
but you’re thinking about it.
But God is saying to you right now,
walk away from the bowl.
Its not worth it,
I know you’re being tempted to compromise,
but your integrity is worth more than the bowl,
walk away from the bowl.
Lesson #3
Beware of the temptation to give up what you want most, for what you want now.
That’s what happened to Esau,
and that’s what happens to us.
We say, of course I want to be around to raise my kids,
of course I want to be there for them,
and make something good of my life,
and be respected by people,
and leave a good legacy,
Of course I want all that,
but right now, she looks really good.
Be careful that you don’t give up what you want most,
for what you want now.
I see Christians everywhere sell out their birthright,
for a bowl of beans.
A couple weeks ago I was having lunch with some pastors,
and there was a new guy there, a Baptist pastor,
and I asked him what happened to the previous pastor
at that church,
and he said, he got fired.
And I immediately knew,
Oh no, not another moral failure.
Sure enough.
Another guy that sold his birthright,
sold everything that was precious to him,
sold it for a bowl of beans.
Sometimes I want to shake people and tell them,
Don’t you know,
A bowl of beans for a birthright is a bad deal.
It’s a bad deal.
That bowl isn’t gonna satisfy you.
That bowl isn’t gonna fulfill you.
Don’t do it.
Don’t ruin your life and your legacy,
don’t give away your birthright.
Don’t do something that’s going to scar your kids,
for decades after you’re dead.
What are you thinking?
Now some of you might be saying,
well Ken, it’s a nice story,
but I don’t have a birthright,
so Ken your sermon,
while somewhat entertaining,
is not applicable under my circumstances.
Well maybe you didn’t know it,
but you do have a birthright.
Every believer has a birthright.
Scripture says,
we have an inheritance
that is kept for us that will never perish, spoil or fade
You have a spiritual inheritance,
you have a birthright,
and I don’t care how rich your parents are,
and how much dough they’re gonna leave,
your spiritual inheritance is way, way better than that.
As a child of God there are things that God has
set aside for you
and planned for you,
and designed for you,
that have your name on it,
You have an inheritance and a birthright.
And you see, the devil can’t take away your birthright,
He has to get you to give it up.
During OT times
there were only 3 things that could happen with a birthright,
It could be doubled, (which is pretty cool)
or it could be given away,
or it could be transferred.
In this story we see Esau giving away his birthright,
and we’re going,
what a bad deal, a bowl of beans for a birthright,
don’t do it.
But we see people do this all the time.
Let me give you a few examples.
For instance, God has given us peace.
When you pray to ask for peace,
God says, I already put it in you.
In John chapter 14 Jesus is talking to his disciples
about what’s going to happen after he leaves them,
and he says,
I’m gonna send the Holy Spirit to be with you,
and then he says, in verse 27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
He says, My peace I give to you,
Its part of your inheritance,
that you’ve already received,
Its your birthright.
Jesus says,
If you’re my follower, I’ve given you peace,
so you can be at peace even in the middle of the storm,
peace, even in the middle of problems,
peace, even in the middle of
loss and heartache and loneliness,
I give you my peace.
But the devil has a bowl of worry,
and he wants you to wake up in the morning,
and eat those beans.
Some of you are eating a bowl of beans for breakfast,
and you’re sick to your stomach all day,
sick with worry and stress.
You’ve traded your birthright for a bowl.
God has also given you joy.
Peter says
1 Peter 1:8
…you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
Maybe you’d say,
well Ken, I don’t know about that,
I don’t have a whole lot of joy right now.
Did you know that the devil cannot take your joy?
God gave it to you, and the devil can’t take it,
all he can do is try to get you to give it away.
But he knows if he can get you to eat a big bowl
of grumbling and complaining,
then you’ll give away your birthright, of joy.
Don’t give away your birthright.
Don’t trade a pen for a __________________
Don’t give up what you want most, for what you want now.
Some of you might say,
aren’t we being a little hard on Esau,
I mean, he just made a mistake.
Look at Hebrews 12
If you’ve ever read the book of Hebrews,
chapter 11 is sometimes called the Hall of Faith,
because it lists all the great men and women of God,
throughout the bible,
and then in Hebrews 12:15 it says this…
See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God, and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. 16 See that no one is sexually immoral, or is godless like Esau, who for a single meal sold his inheritance rights as the oldest son.
So the writer of Hebrews is going along,
See that no one is sexually immoral, or is godless
Uh, lets see, who’s an example of godless?
Oh I know, Esau.
Wow, how’d you like to be remembered like that?
Last week we talked about how
he’s the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob…
have you ever thought about how,
since Esau was the firstborn son with the birthright,
it was supposed to go like this…
the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Esau…
but Esau chose the bowl over the birthright.
and now instead of God being called the God of Esau,
Esau is called godless.
because for a single meal he gave up his birthright.
For a single moment,
for something that wasn’t very important,
but he wanted it now.
How many of us for a single moment of satisfaction,
a single moment of pleasure,
a single moment of anger,
a single moment of foolishness,
give up our birthright?
This scripture continues on…
who for a single meal sold his inheritance rights as the oldest son.
17 Afterward, as you know, when he wanted to inherit this blessing, he was rejected. Even though he sought the blessing with tears, he could not change what he had done.
How sad is that?
Even though he sought the blessing with tears, he could not change what he had done.
As I was thinking this week about starving sons
who make bad choices,
I thought about another son in the bible,
who was starving.
You all know the story of the prodigal son,
In that story there were also two brothers,
and the younger brother wanted his inheritance now.
Just like Esau, give it to me now, quick.
He could smell that bowl of beans in front of him,
and he wanted it now.
So he took his inheritance, and set out for a far country,
so he could party and live it up.
And he ate bowls of every kind of beans he desired,
until one day the inheritance was gone,
and so were the beans.
You could say he traded his inheritance, his birthright,
for a bowl of beans,
but then the beans ran out, as they always do.
And now he’s starving, he’s famished.
But this son, when he hit rock bottom,
it says, he came to himself.
That’s what this series is really about,
coming to yourself,
because you’ll never come to God,
until you come to yourself,
And so he came to himself, and said,
how many of my fathers servants are well fed,
and here I am starving,
I’m about to die of hunger,
So he says, I’m going home to my father,
and I’ll tell him I’m sorry,
and ask him if I can just be one of his servants.
But his Father was waiting and watching for him to come home,
and some people say that God’ll meet you half way,
but that is not true.
The Father in this story came running to meet him,
he didn’t meet him halfway,
the moment he saw his son
he came running all the way to meet him,
with joy and love and mercy,
and he’s hugging and kissing and crying,
and he yells to the servants,
go kill the fatted calf,
and somebody start the music,
lets have a party to celebrate,
and somebody else go get him a robe to wear,
and some new sandals,
and get him a ring, a ring is a sign of authority,
it’s a sign that he gets his birthright back,
because my son was dead but now he’s alive,
he was lost but now he’s found,
so we need to celebrate.
When I think about these two stories,
there’s so many similarities,
In each one there’s a son who goes away from home,
and comes back starving,
but in one story he loses his birthright and can’t get it back,
in the other story he comes home and got it all back.
What’s the difference.
Why the difference?
The difference is because of another firstborn son.
Romans 8:29
29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.
Jesus was the firstborn son,
who didn’t take the bowl,
who didn’t sell his birthright,
You see a birthright can be given away,
but it can also be transferred back,
and Jesus the first born of God,
the only begotten of the Father,
will give you your birthright back,
if you’ll just believe.
He’ll give it back.
He bought it,
he paid for it,
he died for it,
but rose again,
so he could give it back to you,
Thank you Jesus, that we have an inheritance,
thank you that we have a birthright,
Thank you that you are our loving older brother,
and that you sacrificed yourself for us,
so that even though we lost our birthright through sin,
you give it back to us,
if we just trust in you.
Lets Stand For Prayer.
If today you’d recognize that, I am that starving son, I am that starving daughter, I haven’t been filling myself with good food so I grow close to God, I’ve been trying to fill myself with the wrong things, or I’ve been wandering,
the good news is, we serve a God of second chances, who wants to fill your life again.
Just pray along with me in your heart, God will hear you…
Heavenly Father,
I admit that I’m a sinner in need of a savior. I believe that Jesus is the son of God and the savior of the world. I believe that he died to forgive my sins and rose to give me new life. I repent of my sins, and I trust in you Jesus as my lord and savior, please put your Holy Spirit in me to give me strength, and I will follow you all the days of my life.
