FOUR-PART HARMONY
1 PETER 3:8-17
INTRODUCTION
The passage that we are going to read today has at minimum about 10 different sermons in it. This morning I am going to preach all ten sermons to you so get comfortable! I locked the doors and ordered in lunch. The passage is rich with meaning and with commands from the Apostle Peter to us:
Live in harmony Be humble Set Christ as Lord Keep a clear conscience
Be sympathetic Repay with blessings Be prepared
Love Keep away from evil Be gentle
Be compassionate Seek peace Be respectful
That is a whole lot in one passage! That is a whole lot to think on and pray over and make a part of our lives if we want to be serious about the Apostle’s teaching as the first century church was. Preaching 10 sermons in one morning would not be helpful, but we are still going to dive into this passage and see what God has for us. I want to admit to you right away that I do not like this sermon one bit. This is one of those sermons that as I am preaching to you… I wish I was sitting in the pew listening because each and every single point, every passage, and every application applies directly into my own life. I have looked into the mirror and I know exactly who I am and exactly how I sometimes react to the people around me. I guess I am asking that you do that with me this morning… look into the mirror and look on yourself with honesty. I am and it hurts.
Let’s read this morning from this challenging passage and as we read, we are going to get caught up in verse 8 which is the first verse we read:
READ 1 Peter 3:8
“Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble.”
I. HARMONY (VERSE 8)
As I was reading this passage over and over, I noticed so much in verse 8. The Apostle Peter tells us first thing in this passage that we are to live in harmony with others around us. I have to tell you that personally I do not always find that easy to do. In walking through this life, we sometimes struggle on doing the right thing, feeling the right way, or having the right attitude when confronted with other people.
When someone lies to us or about us, that makes us angry.
When someone lies about us, we feel the need to set the record straight immediately with everyone we know.
When someone mishandles their money on purpose and then wants help, we are less inclined to help.
When someone insults our husband, wife, or children, we distance ourselves from them.
When someone causes division in a church body, we feel they need to go to protect the rest of the people.
When someone is rude to us, we often get rude right back.
When someone is mad at us, we often get mad right back.
When a good person suffers, we sometimes wonder why and wonder about God’s plan.
When a bad person suffers, we sometimes feel justice is done.
When someone is completely inconsistent in their faith, we want to judge them and distance ourselves.
If any of those things I just said describe you then I do not think you are alone. Many times when we are faced with difficult people, we respond in like attitudes and actions because that is what they deserve. Those things are exactly why the Apostle Peter is writing this passage. Those attitudes and reactions are normal human reactions that most people will experience.
We need to understand that God through Jesus Christ calls us to be more than normal.
We need to understand that God through Jesus Christ calls us to be a holy priesthood building a spiritual house.
We need to understand that God through Jesus Christ calls us to be a people who belong to Him.
We need to understand that God through Jesus Christ calls us to have an authentic relationship with Him where we take His teachings serious and we toss out normal when God says we need to be more or different.
In verse 8, God commands us to “live in harmony with one another.” What does that mean exactly? Fortunately for us, the rest of that verse breaks into four phrases which explain the harmony we are to have with the people around us.
SYMPATHETIC
First, “be sympathetic.” Another way of saying “sympathetic” is “accompanying in sufferings.” Sympathy means that you try your best to walk along side someone when they are suffering. I have always thought sympathy includes empathy which is sharing the feelings of someone as well. The Apostle Peter is commanding us that when in a conflict or uncomfortable situation with someone, we are to put ourselves in their place and work towards harmony with them. The idea is that if we can put ourselves in their “shoes” that we might understand them better.
A great example of sympathy in the Bible comes from Job 2. Job was a man who lost his children, wealth, and health. Job 2:11-13 tells us, “When Job's three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. 12 When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. 13 Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.” Notice what the sympathy entailed in Job 2. Comfort. Weeping. Feeling for him. A gift of their presence over time.
LOVE
Second, we are to “love as brothers.” I have to admit when I was looking at this verse, the love that Peter uses is not the unconditional kind of love we associate with God, but a love that means more “loving like a brother or sister.” I could not figure out why Peter would switch up these terms, but I know he did it for a divinely inspired reason. I came to the conclusion that the Apostle Peter is commanding us to specifically love people we are in conflict or discord with like we would family. Family does not give up on one another. Family loves no matter what. Family sticks together through thick and thin and Peter is commanding us to have this same perspective about those with whom we struggle with.
This command to love each other as family is not just here in 1 Peter.
Romans 12:10 commands “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.”
1 Thessalonians 4:9 reminds, “Now about brotherly love we do not need to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love each other.”
Hebrews 13:1 commands, “Keep on loving each other as brothers.”
COMPASSION
Third, we are to “be compassionate.” Compassion means to be “tender hearted.” Compassion means that we act in a manner that is loving. Love is often a feeling or a choice… compassion is the resulting action. For some reason the word “be” stuck out when I read this phrase and I realized that Peter is not making a suggestion, but it is a command. Compassion is a way of life for us as believers in Jesus Christ. We are to be tender-hearted no matter the situation. We are to have pity on those around us. We say we are believers… then we are to act like it!
Over and over in the Gospels we see that Jesus exhibited the action of compassion. In each and every case, Jesus had love in His heart, but did not allow it to stop there, but to move Him to action:
Matthew 9:36: “When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.”
Matthew 14:14: “When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them and healed their sick.”
Matthew 20:34: “Jesus had compassion them and touched their eyes. Immediately they received their sight and followed him.”
Mark 1:41: “Filled with compassion, Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. "I am willing," he said. "Be clean!”
HUMILITY
Fourth, Peter includes a command in verse 8 that we should “be humble.” I think the Apostle Peter lists humility at the end because it is the key to make harmony work. Humbleness means to be “lowly in thoughts” and to put others before you. Humbleness is a quality that fights against the idea that we are #1, we get what we deserve, our rights are paramount, and we are the most important person in any relationship. Humility fights against those sinful attitudes. Humility often gives up our rights to be wronged and allows the other person control or forgiveness or grace when they do not deserve it.
The Bible has much to say to believers in Jesus Christ about humbleness:
Matthew 18:4: “Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”
Ephesians 4:2: “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”
James 3:13: “Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.”
James 4:10: “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.”
1 Peter 5:5-6: “All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.”
SUMMARY
So the Apostle Peter commands us to “live in harmony with one another” and then further explains what that looks like in four parts… four-part harmony. He explains that it involves sympathy. He explains it involves brotherly love. He explains it involves the action of compassion. He also includes the key of humility which makes harmony possible. Peter does not stop in verse 8 in helping us, but goes on to describe issues and situations we might find ourselves in as we live our lives. I saw in the rest of the passage three possible people we might encounter and we need to apply “liv[ing] in harmony with one another” with all these people we meet.
II. HARMONY WITH INSULTING IRENE (VERSES 9-10, 16)
READ 1 Peter 3:9-10
“Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 10 For, "Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech.”
READ 1 Peter 3:16
“keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.”
The first one that I saw for us is having harmony with “Insulting Irene.” Verse 9 describes us being insulted. It describes in verse 10 someone speaking evil and even lying. In verse 16, Peter further describes someone who speaks maliciously against us to hurt us or our families.
How are we to behave towards someone who insults us, lies to us or about us, and tries to ruin our reputation with others? Are we supposed to respond just like them? Are we supposed to insult them in return with an even better cutting insult? Do we defend ourselves when we are attacked verbally or maybe through an email or social media posting?
* Sympathy means we prayerfully place ourselves in the shoes of the person who is doing the insulting and the lying. When we do that, we arrest judgmental attitudes we may have and might see a reason of why they are acting the way they are. Not an excuse, but we can understand and may find a way to encourage peace with them.
* Love means we do not respond in the same way they have attacked us. Love means when we think of them, we ask God to change any anger, hate, resentment, or short-tempers we have with someone to love that will persevere through the problem.
* Compassion means we actively do something loving. Complement them. Send a gift. Return their hostility with a blessing. By the way, this can be fun. Proverbs 25:21-22 says, “ If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. 22 In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you.” Just knowing every time you bless someone when they curse you hurts them might be a weird way to get back at them. Plus we get a reward from God. Win win.
* Humbleness means we give up our rights to get back at someone or to make the insults or lies even. Humbleness means we submit to God’s will in conflict even if it seems like we get the raw end of the deal and it is unfair.
ILLUSTRATION… Insulting (p)
I once told someone they were a “bitter old evil man” in the presence of his family after he got done berating me and telling me I was not a Christian.
I once stood silent in a room with 60 people after listening to 10 minutes of someone insulting me for something I had not even done. Not one person defended me or challenged the insults even though they knew the truth.
I have a choice. I want to be who Jesus calls me to be. I want to practice four-part harmony.
III. HARMONY WITH NOT FAIR NORMAN (VERSES 12-14, 17)
READ 1 Peter 3:12-14
“For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil." 13 Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? 14 But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened."
READ 1 Peter 3:17
“It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil.”
The second one that I saw for us is having harmony with “Not Fair Norman.” Verse 12 describes evil happening. Verse 14 points out directly that it is possible to suffer for doing good. It is possible that things would be unfair or people will be unfair for no reason. Verse 14 also points out that sometimes people act unfairly because of fear.
How are we to behave towards someone who acts completely unfairly? Are we to complain that we are not treated fairly? Are we to get back at someone by being equally unfair to them in speech or in actions? Do we defend ourselves when we are treated unfairly maybe through an email or social media posting?
* Sympathy means we try and figure out why the person is being unfair. What expectations or trials or hurt feelings are they going through that has produced in them the unfair actions or attitudes? Trying to see the world through their eyes and experience will help us to understand the situation better.
* Love when someone is unfair to you means you adopt an attitude on the inside that you will be fair, peaceful, and seek resolution if at all possible. Love means you fight off bitterness because unfairness has been thrust upon you.
* Compassion in this instance means, in my opinion, we have nothing but pity for someone who treats us unfairly. There are times when someone will treat you so unfairly and you need to move to the point that you feel pity and sorrow for them because they feel like they have to treat you poorly. Their life is so miserable they are extending that to you… and that is sad… for them.
* Humbleness means we give up our rights to get back at someone or to make the unfairness fair. Humbleness means we submit to God’s will in the unfair conflict even if it seems like we get the raw end of the deal. God promises us that when we answer unfairness with harmony that we are blessed because of it.
ILLUSTRATION… Not Fair (p)
I once lost my temper once in a room full of people I deeply trusted and wanted their approval once I found out a person under my authority had been undermining my authority unfairly and on purpose.
I once found out that a young woman I cared about had been lied to and the things she had been told about my attitudes and words were out of context and completely unfair. I chose to let her think the best of the people she trusts and to this day have not challenged those unfair statements in anyway.
I have a choice. I want to be who Jesus calls me to be. I want to practice four-part harmony.
IV. HARMONY WITH SEEKING SUSAN (VERSE 15)
READ 1 Peter 3:15
“But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect”
The verse we read earlier, 1 Peter 3:15, is a verse about evangelism and witnessing. Let’s break down the verse briefly.
The third person that I saw for us is having harmony with “Seeking Susan.” Not everyone we come across in our lives will be a believer in Jesus Christ and some of them will be hostile to faith. The Apostle Peter tells us that we should be prepared at all times, in all situations, and perhaps even at the drop of a hat to explain what we believe, why we believe it, and how someone else can believe the same things as us. We are to be ready to answer questions about faith when asked. It doesn’t matter who asks us… the questions could come from family, friends, co-workers, enemies, acquaintances… it doesn’t matter. We are to share with everyone we come across. Our end goal is the communication of faith, not a verbal ‘beat down’ on how awful the person is or a lecture about how hot Hell is this time of year. Our answers to non-believing people around us about faith should be injected with gentleness and respect.
* Sympathy means we try and put ourselves in the life and attitudes of the non-believer we are talking to so that we can explain how Jesus Christ can help. We should try and honestly look at their objections or obstacles of faith to understand.
* Love must be our attitude as we deal with people’s hurts and expectations of God. Our words, attitudes, actions, answers, and even invitations to church should come from a place of love.
* Compassion for a non-believer means we help them even if they have said they reject our God and our Savior. * Humbleness means we realize that we may not have all the answers and that in the end it is God that draws a person’s heart to Him and saves them. We are a messenger. We are the seed planter. We are the sign pointing them to God, but we cannot make them believe.
ILLUSTRATON… Seeker (p)
I once sat in a room with a young lady who was trying to find her way in the world and I let her walk out of my office without fully explaining that by setting God on the back burner of her life she was making a huge mistake. I did not have a ready loving answer for her questions.
I once stayed friends with someone who ridiculed me for being a Christian and actually considered it a character flaw that I prayed to God.
I have a choice. I want to be who Jesus calls me to be. I want to practice four-part harmony.
CONCLUSION
When you look in the mirror, who do you see?
Do you see someone who repays evil with evil?
Do you see someone who replies insult with insult?
Do you see someone who lies about others when you find out they have lied about you?
Do you see someone who when faced with unfairness decides to do whatever is needed to get even?
Do you see someone who when faced with unfairness decides to defend yourself at all costs?
The Apostle Peter commands us to “live in harmony” with the people around us which means we are sympathetic, loving, compassionate, and humble when we want to be and especially when we don’t want to be and the people we deal with don’t deserve it.
Be sympathy.
Be love.
Be compassion.
Be humble.
Be harmony.
