Counting the Cost of Finance
Acts 4:32-37
Dave Ramsey tells the story of feeling as lost as a ball in tall weeds. He felt that life was out of control, he had no sense of power and there was a deep sense of dread creeping over him like shadows on a cold wintry day. He found himself sitting at his kitchen table paying bills with “too much month left at the end of his money.” He was very afraid, afraid of this month’s bills, this month’s mortgage and absolutely terrified when he thought of the future. They had too much debt, too little savings and no sense of control over their life. No matter how hard he worked, it seemed he couldn’t win. The next car purchase, the next house, the kid’s college seemed out of reach. The hopelessness was overwhelming. And every time he and his wife talked about money, they ended up fighting. “I felt like a gerbil is a wheel- run, run, run, no traction, no ground covered…All the money came in, all the money went out…Oh. Some months everything seemed to work, and I thought we were going to be OK….but deep down I knew we weren’t….I was good at real estate but I was better at borrowing money…Then we went through financial hell and lost everything over a three year period of time.”
$11.83 trillion - that’s not our national debt, that’s the total U.S. consumer debt, including mortgages, credit cards, auto loans and student loans. The average person is carrying $7,281 in credit card debt. Only 41% of families spend less than they earn. Over 60% don’t pay the balance each month on their credit cards. With an average interest rate of 13.02%. Americans have a debt problem. And making more money isn’t the answer. Here’s a brief list of celebrities who made 10’s of millions and some 100’s of millions only to declare bankruptcy: NBA star Allen Iverson, Billy Joel (3 times), Kim Basinger, MC Hammer, Michael Vick, Mike Tyson, Nicolas Cage, Terrell Owens. And a whopping 70% of lottery winners go broke.
Why bring this subject up as we conclude a series on marriage? Because there’s 3 major reasons couples get divorced: communication problems, infidelity but money tops the list. In fact, one study found that 70% of divorces were directly or indirectly caused by financial issues. It’s like the vows have been changed to “Til debt do us part.” Our culture tells us that money and material possessions are the key to happiness and that all we need to do is make more. But God has a lot to say on this subject of money as well. The Scriptures talk about faith over 700 times throughout the entire Bible, while on the other hand, money is talked about over 2,100 times. Jesus spoke more about money than He did about heaven or hell combined. Eleven of 39 parables are about money, and 1 out of every 7 verses in the Gospel of Luke talk about money. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus spends an entire half chapter on money (Matthew 6), while only spending a few verses on every other subject.
Now here’s what often happens in church - sometimes you’ll hear a message about how we need to tithe and give God 10% because Deuteronomy 14:23 says, “The purpose of tithing is to teach you to always put God first in your life.” Tithing isn’t about giving money to God. Contrary to what many of the TV preachers say, God isn’t broke and heaven isn’t in foreclosure. Tithing teachs us to put God first in our life. Why? Because our spending reveals our values. But what about the other 90%? Our Scripture today is a very odd story in the New Testament but within it, we’re going to ask 4 financial questions that could save your marriage. First, who does this money belong to anyway? (v. 1-2) I believe if you want God to bless your finances, you need to honor him with your finances by first recognizing that everything comes from God. That means putting God first in your finances. This is what the Old Testament says, “Honor the LORD with your wealth and with the firstfruits of all your produce.” Proverbs 3:9 To give God the first fruits means to give God the first of what you earn. If we give back to God from what He has given to us, we will break the cycle of greed and possessions that so marks our culture.
And amazingly, God promises to bless those who obey Him. In fact, he wants us to test him in this promise. God calls us to step out in faith and see if he’ll follow through on his promises. In Malachi 3:8-10, God asks: “Bring all the tithes into the storehouse so there will be enough food in my Temple. If you do,” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies, “I will open the windows of heaven for you. I will pour out a blessing so great you won’t have enough room to take it in! Try it! Put me to the test!” (Malachi 3:8-10) This is God’s challenge - to test Him in the area of our finances by putting Him first through tithing. In all my years of ministry, I have never had one person who tried tithing for 3 months and doing finances God’s way and then stopped. Why? Because they experienced God’s blessings and the fulfillment of His promises when they tithe. There are tons of followers of Christ who have decided to trust God with the tithe and would never dream of not giving God 10% because He has a way of making 90% last longer than 100%.
In our Scripture today, we have the story of a couple who decided to give, but they held back in their giving. God’s spirit was moving in the early church that there were no needy persons among them because everyone responded to whatever need was presented. Many of the church members sold land or houses and brought the money from the sales to the apostles’ and it was distributed to anyone who had need. Now Ananias and Sapphira sold their land but held money back for themselves. They gave, but they gave out of a scarcity mindset and a fear that they would not have enough. And what made it worse was they came before the apostles and let them think they were giving it all. God wants love to be our motive in giving and in that trust in Him rather than fear. When I realize all God has done for me, my response is to give to God out of a heart of gratitude. “Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” (2 Cor. 9:6-7) So the first step to making sure finances don’t ruin your marriage is to invite God into your finances, let Him guide you because it really all belongs to Him.
Second, do we have a vision for our Finances? (v. 3-6) One of the greatest gifts you can give your marriage is the gift of a common vision that you and your spouse have for your finances. Author Hugh Prather tells the story of working on his Ph.D in Psychology and being forced to drop out for health reasons. While he was convalescing, it occurred to him that he could write books without a Ph.D. So he asked his wife Gayle if she would be willing to work and support them while he wrote and tried to get published. Within two years, he had enough income for them to live on and Gayle stopped working. As more books were published and income increased Gayle’s contribution dwindled in his mind. His debt to her had been paid many times over. They began to argue over large purchases, how their wills would read, should Gayle get a job and should she have an allowance. Even the discussion of a post marital financial agreement came up. They became miserable as a lack of vision for their finances gripped them. The turning point was when they both decided together that they didn’t want to be unhappy. So they began to put together a plan of not only how to handle their money but also a vision of what they wanted to accomplish with it.
But it’s not just about having a vision for your finances, it’s also about having a good vision. Because a bad one will kill you. That’s what happened to Ananais. His hypocritical vision killed him. And don’t think that a bad financial vision can’t hurt you. It’s why people go bankrupt. It’s why many marriages break up because each person isn’t on the same page. Couples need to be in agreement on how money is spent and their financial goals? You need to make decisions about money that allow for checks, balances, and freedom. How much can each of you spend without consulting one another? Will you use credit cards? If you use them, will you pay them off at month’s end? What is acceptable debt? What is your savings plan? Will each of you have an allowance each month? How much will go towards retirement? How much toward your kid’s college fund? How much for entertainment? And will you tithe?
These are conversations you need to have to get on the same page. If not, you’re going to assume that the other has the same vision you have and that’s where problems start and marriages eventually end. Instead, put together a budget and talk specifically about your goals and your spending patterns and guidelines.
Third, are we willing to face reality? (v. 7-10) Dave Ramsey continues: After losing everything over a three year period of time, “we were sued, with a brand new baby and a toddler, we were bankrupt. Scared doesn’t begin to cover it. Crushed comes close but we held on to each other and decided we needed to change…That led me to a really, really uncomfortable place- my mirror. I came to realize that my money problems, worries and shortages largely began and ended with the person in the mirror. I realized also that if I could learn to manage the character I shaved with every morning, I could win at money. That quest, the one that ended with me staring at myself in the mirror, led me on a new journey…” It caused Dave to change his ways.
Sapphira had an opportunity to face reality and come clean, but instead she chose to keep living the lie. Our biggest challenge financially is to face reality and stop living a lie. You have to own up to your financial situation and the measures it’ll take to bet ahold of your finances. You have to find out exactly what debt you have, how much you make, how much you spend and the steps you need to take to either right your financial ship or achieve your goals. Financial freedom is 20% education and 80% behavior. But you have to know where you’re starting from. With this knowledge comes wisdom. Proverbs 24:3-4 says, “By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.” You can’t build your future until you know how much of the past you need to pay - write it all down and both of you talk about it.
Fourth, am I willing to pay the price?----- (v. 11) Whether you need to get out of debt or align your spending with God’s priority or step up to the tithe, there’s a price to be paid. And it comes through sacrifice and changing your priorities. Most people don’t want to pay it because it requires a lot of self control. For some, it may mean you have to simplified your life. For others, it might mean you need to implement austere measures. For still other, it might mean you have to give up some things to accomplish others. Your spending reveals your values. So what is your spending saying to you? What are the things it reveals about what’s important to you? Our attitude towards money is a statement of faith - it’s revealing what we believe. And it reveals whether we trust in money or God. And it’s revealing if we think the money is ours or God’s. But the Bible teaches that all of it really belongs to Him, we’re all just managing it. The Bible calls us stewards or money managers. In our Scripture today, we see a great contrast bwteen Ananias and Saphira and the rest of the church. Ananias and Saphira were ruled by fear in their finances. But when we see the people of the early church giving, great joy and grace was upon them. So which would characterize you?
“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” (Matt. 6:28-33)
God wants to be gracious and bless you, but you need to put Him first in your marriage and first in your finances. Your marriage can be filled with trust, grace and hope, but you both have to get on the same page so you are moving in the same direction and under the same priorities.
