SERMON OUTLINE:
(1). Singles are better able to cope with troubles (vs 25-28).
(2). Singles are better able to maintain spiritual priorities (vs 29-31).
(3). Singles have fewer distractions (vs 32-35).
(4). Singles have the option of marriage (vs 36-40).
SERMONBODY:
Ill:
What do these people all have in common:
Helen Keller, Amy Carmichael, Robbert Murray MacChenne, Basilea Schlink,
Gladys Aylward, David Brainerd, Florence Nightingale, Helen Roseveare,
Sadhu Sundar Singh, Henrietta Mears, Mary Slessor, Jackie Pullinger, Corrie Ten Boom,
If you need a few more names try these:
Joseph, Miriam (Moses sister), Mary, Martha, Lazarus, Jeremiah, Ezekiel, Nehemiah,
John the Baptist and of course Jesus Christ!
• The answer is that they were all single people;
• None of them as far as we know ever found a partner to marry;
• Or they were not looking because they chose to live a single life.
Quote: Lou Nicholes – Missio.
• I don’t know how accurate these statistics are;
• But the point they make is valid, even if the stats vary.
“Statistics tell us that 37% of adults over 18 are single.
During the average person’s lifetime, a significant portion of their life will be spent single.
Typically the first 25 years of life and perhaps the last 10-15 years will be spent as a single person. “
• TRANSITION: So what the Bible says here about singleness;
• Does draw in a wider audience than we might at first think.
In our passage this evening we have some insight from the apostle Paul:
• Now regarding Paul as to whether he was a single or married man;
• The experts are divided!
• Some say quite adamantly that Paul was married;
• Because in his day it was required for a Pharisees &Jewish Rabbi to be a married man.
• Others are convinced he was a single man;
• And the two groups of experts happily or unhappily argue their case.
What we do know is at the time of 1 Corinthians the apostle Paul was a single man:
• For the duration of his ministry he appears single.
• The book of Acts omits any mention of Paul having a wife,
• And the apostles own letters seem to indicate the same.
• In this letter 1 Corinthians chapter 7 verse 8 he writes:
• “I say to the unmarried and to widows that it is good for them if they remain even as I.”
• So the apostle Paul puts himself in the category of being “unmarried”;
• And his words are from one single person to another.
• In this chapter he will suggest that being single;
• Remaining unmarried has a number of advantages.
Note:
• While many of these advantages list here can be universally true,
• And have an application for us today.
• We must always be careful to understand what Paul is saying;
• In the context of his letter to the Corinthians.
• He is writing to a specific Church who have a specific set of circumstances.
• That awareness may well make a difference;
• To both our understanding and application of this passage.
(1). Singles are better able to cope with troubles (vs 25-28).
“Now about virgins: I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy.
Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for a man to remain as he is.
Are you pledged to a woman? Do not seek to be released. Are you free from such a commitment? Do not look for a wife.
But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.”
ill:
• I recently heard the story of a lady who wanted to marry four different men in her lifetime.
• Each one would help her with the four things she needed most.
• First she wanted to marry a banker.
• Second a movie star.
• Next a clergyman.
• And finally a funeral director.
• When asked why, she replied:
• “One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready and four to go!”
• TRANSITION: In these verses (25-29);
• The apostle Paul informs us not everyone is in need of one or even four husbands!
• In fact he suggests that being single isn’t as bad as some people think.
The apostle recommends that engaged couples should consider remaining single.
• So in these verses,
• He is focusing on those who are engaged to be married.
Ill:
• We have some engaged couples in our Church fellowship,
• I am not sure they would be too keen to listen to this sermon;
• Or to read these verses!
• Please notice his use of words in verse 25:
• “I have no command from the Lord”
• And again in verse 40: “ In my judgment”
• The apostle Paul makes it clear that he is giving us his “opinion”;
• And not a divine command.
Then the apostle Paul then gives us the first reason why it is an advantage to be single.
• In verses 25-28: the apostle Paul recommends:
• Singleness in light of upsetting circumstances.
• Notice in verse 26 he speaks of “the present distress”
• And in verse 28 he refers to “trouble in this life.”
Now remember these verses are set in New testament times:
• The apostle Paul’s conviction is that Christians are called to suffer:
• He appears to say, “It’s only a matter of time – just wait and see”.
Ill:
• Now the apostle was not a negative, depressing person like Private Frazer;
• The fictional Home Guard character in the BBC television sitcom Dad's Army.
• Who was always saying the phrases "we're doomed!"
• TRANSITION: The apostle Paul’s conviction is that Christians are called to suffer:
• And he was right because just ten years after he wrote this letter;
• The Roman emperor Nero falsely blamed Christians for setting the imperial capital ablaze.
• Nero slaughtered Christians of all ages;
• His persecution soon spilled over Rome’s city limits to the rest of the empire.
• It was a dangerous and a horrific time to be a Christians.
Quote: Foxes Book of Martyrs.
“They were punished with stripes and scourgings, drawings, tearings, stonings, plates of iron laid unto them burning hot, deep dungeons, racks, strangling in prisons, the teeth of wild beasts, gridirons, gibbets and gallows, tossing upon the horns of bulls. Moreover they were thus killed, their bodies were laid in heaps, and dogs there left to keep them, that no man might come to bury them”.
While many of our brothers and sisters still face persecution:
• We saw that earlier in the World Watch List DVD Clip from Open Doors.
• (Youtube: https://youtu.be/FD6Ocb1J6qQ)
• We still face problems and difficulties:
• i.e. the loss of a job, or health, or a partner, or a child
• Suffering alone is difficult enough;
• But watching a partner or a child suffer can be unbearable.
So to summarize this first section:
• The apostle Paul’s advice is stay on your side of the fence.
• If you are already married stay married.
• But if you are single, remember with the very real threat of persecution and hardship;
• It might be best to remain single.
(2). Singles are better able to maintain spiritual priorities (vs 29-31).
“What I mean, brothers and sisters, is that the time is short. From now on those who have wives should live as if they do not;
those who mourn, as if they did not; those who are happy, as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep;
those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this world in its present form is passing away.”
Ill:
• William Booth was the founder of the Salvation Army;
• You might say he was unconventional – I prefer one of God’s originals!
• One Sunday evening, William Booth was walking in London with his son, Bramwell,
• Who was then 12 or 13 years old.
• The father surprised the son by taking him to a tavern!
• The place was crowded with men and women.
• Some of them were drunk. Some of them were loud.
• And the air was filled with the smell of alcohol and tobacco.
• And Bramwell said to his dad, "Can we go now? Why did you even bring me in here?"
• And Willaim Booth said,
"Son, these are our people; these are the ones I want you to love. These are the people I want you to live for. These are the people I want you to bring to Christ."
• Years later, Bramwell wrote,
• "That was a lesson I never forgot."
During the early days of the Salvation Army:
• William Booth and his associates were bitterly attacked in the press;
• By religious leaders and government leaders alike.
• Whenever his son, Bramwell, showed Booth a newspaper attack,
• William Booth would reply,
"Bramwell, fifty years heance it will matter very little indeed how these people treated us; it will matter a great deal how we dealt with the work of God."
• TRANSITION: Like William Booth the apostle Paul believed that life is short.
• The apostle Paul challenges us to live with the end in mind.
• That could be the end of life or the return of Jesus Christ!
• Notice that twice he stresses this:
• Verse 29: “The time has been shortened”
• Verse 31: “This world is passing away”.
Ill:
• It is a reminder of the brevity of life.
• No one lives forever on planet earth.
• You may live 30 or 40 or 50 years. Who knows? You may live 80 or 90 years,
• But sooner or later you’re going to die.
• And no matter how long you live,
• You’re going to be dead a lot longer than you’re going to be alive.
• If you doubt that, just check out the nearest cemetery.
• Every grave is proof that the time is short.
• Quote: Matthew Henry says that we should live with “holy indifference”;
• To the things of this world.
In fact the apostle Paul fleshes this out in five different ways:
• FIRST: With regard to our intimate relationships (vs 29):
• “From now on those who have wives should live as if they do not”
• Now there’s a verse you don’t hear quoted at many weddings.
• It simply means, enjoy your marriage…
• But don’t make your marriage the most important thing in your life.
• SECOND: With regard to afflictions (vs 30a):
• “ those who mourn, as if they did not”
• In other words mourn and weep but do not be so overcome with grief;
• That you forget and act as if God doesn’t have the final word.
• He does!
• THIRD: With regard to pleasure (vs 30b):
• “those who are happy, as if they were not”.
• Do not get so caught up in joy that you forget suffering is right around the corner.
• In everything you do, don’t forget about eternal realities.
• FOURTH: With regard to purchases (vs 30c):
• “those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep”.
• When you do make purchases, be a wise steward.
• Don’t spend carelessly on the world’s toys and trinkets.
• And what you do purchase, hold loosely.
• Be careful, lest the things you possess end up possessing you.
• FIFTH: With regard to all earthly concerns (vs 31a):
• “those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them.
• for this world in its present form is passing away.”
• Use the world, enjoy the world, live in the world,
• Work in the world, buy and sell in the world, but do not let the world rule your life!
• The message is clear and unmistakable.
• You won’t be here forever.
• Enjoy life, live it to the fullest, take advantage of every moment,
• But don’t indulge yourself so much that you lose your focus on what really matters.
So to summarize this second section:
• Single Christian men & women;
• Are better able to maintain spiritual priorities.
Ill:
• Two years ago I was at a very large conference in London;
• And during the lunchtime break I sat next to a man in his early twenties.
• Apologies because I can be exact about which country he came from;
• I think he was born and grew up in an Iranian family.
• But he was with about six other young men;
• Working among Iranians living in London.
As we chatted I asked the usual questions, including:
• “Are you married?”
• His answer was, “No, we have chosen not too!”
• These young Iranian men had made a conscience choice;
• A decision to given themselves fully to reaching Iranian people with the gospel.
• I said to him, “That’s tough but self-sacrificing”
• And who knows what might happen in ten or twenty years time”
• Straight away he said;
• “No! This isn’t just for a few years, we have given the whole of our lives for this!”
• TRANSITION:
• This is what the apostle Paul says inn these verses;
• I guess that is further illustrated in the next section.
(3). Singles have fewer distractions (vs 32-35).
“ I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs – how he can please the Lord.
But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world – how he can please his wife –
and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world – how she can please her husband.
I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.”
Ill:
• Have you ever wondered why animal trainers;
• Carry a stool when they go into a cage of lions.
• They have their whips, of course, and their pistols are at their sides.
• But invariably they also carry a stool.
• Which is not for show, it is the most important tool of the trainer.
• He holds the stool by the back and thrusts the legs toward the face of the wild animal.
• Those who know maintain that the animal tries to focus on all four legs at once.
• In the attempt to focus on all four, a kind of paralysis overwhelms the animal,
• And it becomes tame, weak, and disabled because its attention is fragmented.
• TRANSITION:
• Married couples are rightly preserved with cultivating their marriages;
• For marriage to work well much it requires immense sacrifice,
• Of time, and energy.
• In order to meet the needs and desires of the other partner.
• So a married persons interests are divided.
• i.e. They must balance their commitment to their partners, children, and God
• But if you are single you are free from those concerns.
• One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord,
• And how they may please the Lord;
So to summarize this second section:
• Married people will be distracted by the other partner and by children etc.
• Single people have the opportunity to be fully focused on the things of God.
(4). Singles have the option of marriage (vs 36-40).
“If anyone is worried that he might not be acting honorably towards the virgin he is engaged to, and if his passions are too strong and he feels he ought to marry, he should do as he wants. He is not sinning. They should get married.
But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion but has control over his own will, and who has made up his mind not to marry the virgin – this man also does the right thing.
So then, he who marries the virgin does right, but he who does not marry her does better.
A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.
In my judgment, she is happier if she stays as she is – and I think that I too have the Spirit of God.”
Ill:
• Pastor & Author Chuck Swindoll tells this story,
• He said there was a recently married woman in his church;
• Who had been single for years and she said,
• "Pastor, I just want you to know that for a year;
• I've been praying for my future husband;
• And God just led me to him and here's what I did.
• Every night I would hang a pair of men's pants beside my bed;
• And I would pray this prayer.
'Oh dear God, please hear my prayer
and answer if you can.
I've hung a pair of trousers here.
Please fill them with a man'.
The apostle Paul is a realist:
• He knows that it is not easy being single.
• In these verses he talks about one of the most difficult part of being single;
• The pressure of sexual temptation.
Quote: The Message paraphrases verses 36-38 this way:
“ If a man has a woman friend to whom he is loyal but never intended to marry, having decided to serve God as a “single,” and then changes his mind, deciding he should marry her, he should go ahead and marry. It’s no sin; it’s not even a “step down” from celibacy, as some say. On the other hand, if a man is comfortable in his decision for a single life in service to God and it’s entirely his own conviction and not imposed on him by others, he ought to stick with it. Marriage is spiritually and morally right and not inferior to singleness in any way, although as I indicated earlier, because of the times we live in, I do have pastoral reasons for encouraging singleness.”
This final section of Paul’s discussion of sex and marriage:
• Is quite ambiguous for us.
• Doubtless his readers at Corinth knew exactly what he was talking about.
• But we do not.
• Bible scholars and Bible translators;
• Admit their uncertainty and give various interpretive views.
The apostle Paul is speaking here to one of two groups:
• FIRST: To parents of daughters.
• Who did all the arranging of marriges in that culture.
• (this is the slant taken by Jerusalem Bible; and the NEB)
• SECOND: To engaged couples:
• (this is the slant taken by the ESV, RSV, NRSV, NIV, TEV, and Phillip)
• Engaged but not yet married and so still at this point in time single.
• So the apostle says; “I would say stay as you are - single”
But whatever view you take the gist of the argument is:
• If as a single person you are finding it difficult to keep your passions under control;
• Then you would be better off marrying.
• But not every single person is;
• So note the, "whoever is firmly established in his heart"
• Many a single Christian has learned to control their passions;
• And they are secure in themselves and their situation.
• They have learnt and we need to remember that:
• Singleness, like marriage, is a gift from God!
• So the apostle Paul writes:
• Everyone likes to have the freedom to choose,
• So here the apostle Paul leaves the choice up to engaged couple.
• He reminds them that BOTH options (singleness or marriage);
• Are viable and permissible.
So to summarize this second section:
• Not every marriage that is scriptural is necessarily sensible;
• We should not rush into marriage because of fear of being lonely.
• Being single does not mean you are ‘left on the shelf’.
• Because singleness is as much a gift from God as marriage is.
• Remember that not every marriage is a blessing:
• Quote: “Success is not so much marrying one who makes you happy;
• As escaping the many who could make you miserable!”
In Conclusion:
• Paul concludes this chapter and his section on marriage and singleness;
• With these words found in verses 39-40.
“A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.
In my judgment, she is happier if she stays as she is – and I think that I too have the Spirit of God.”
In these verses the apostle gives advice to widows:
Paul concludes this section on marriage, divorce, and remarriage;
With an emphasis on his two most important thoughts:
• FIRST: Marriage is for life.
• Verse 39a: “A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives.”
• ill: Wedding vows; “’til death us do part”
• Therefore if your partner dies then you are free to remarry.
• If you so choose.
• SECOND: Christians should only marry Christians.
• Verse 39b: “but he/she must belong to the Lord.”
• Quote: I like the saying regarding finding a partner:
• "Run towards Jesus are fast as you can and if someone keeps up, introduce yourself"
Prayer:
Loving God and Heavenly Father,
We thank you for your Word and pray you will apply to each and every one of us. May day deepen our resolve to be devoted in the service of Jesus Christ!.
We do pray for the single people in this congregation, for those unmarried, once married now single, for those widowed, we pray that you will lead and guide them as to how they respond to the teaching of your word.
We pray for the single people in this church, we are thankful for their faithful, loving service as they serve you with a whole heart, we pray for those who have been divorced and have to struggle with the issues of singleness and even being single and raising a family, Lord please be gracious towards them.
We pray for those single people who desire to be married, and are waiting for that partner to come along that you would have them marry. I pray to that end that you will make them the men and women they ought to be so that they will recognize your will as it unfolds in that right person for them.
Lord, in every case, whether married or single, fulfill Your purpose and Your will in every life. Whether we are, married or single, divorced or widowed, we ask, Lord, that we would just be all you want us to be that you might use that temporal state for your own glory, for we ask these things in name of Jesus Christ. Amen
SERMON AUDIO:
https://surf.pxwave.com/wl/?id=Mvci1eQ1EnZ7xkV3MmAGpRXX6BJ1odws
