Friends
Pt. 4 - Pianos and Pushing
I. Introduction
Welcome to "Friend Day". Over the last few weeks we have been discussing the value and importance of friendship. We know that Jesus valued His friends. Like us, Jesus had relationships that progressed to the level of friends. In John 15, we discover that at some point Jesus called His disciples servants but due to the incremental nature of intimacy He progresses to calling them friends. He also tells us why He graduated to this level. He says He could do that because they knew how to handle His business. Jesus knew that although we owe everyone love we only owe those who have proven themselves access. So, associates get your gift but friends get your life (your business).
So we have established that it is essential to choose the correct people as friends and also that we know how to be good friends. To find the right people and to be the right kind of friend we must look for character, honesty and reliability.
In the 1990's we were taught lessons (good and bad) from Ross, Monica, Joey, Phoebe, Rachel and Chandler. Let's see what they help us learn today.
Friends understand and know the power of encouragement. In this clip, we see that power on display. Although they use the power in less than honest manner they push Ross to take a chance and a risk.
The Bible very clearly states, in Proverbs 18, that the tongue is so powerful that it has the ability to produce life or death in the person we speak to. I submit to you today that this power is never more powerful than when words are spoken from friends. Think about that a second . . . when someone I don't know or have no relationship with says something about me bad I can blow that off cause they don't know me. If they say something good I appreciate it but since they don't know me it doesn't cause me to rise up and take a risk. But when a friend speaks bad it is devastating. However, when a friend fills their mouth with encouragement their knowledge of me coupled with their belief in me is an incredible God fused power that pushes me past failure, doubt, fear, and hesitation.
The background is after spending an evening of eating and enjoying each other's company Jesus in Matthew 26 looks at His friend Peter and declares before the rooster crows you will deny me 3 times. Peter protests and miserably fails. Before day break, accused of being a follower of a soon to be crucified Jesus . . . Peter, emphasizing with a curse, says no way. I don't know him. Then Scripture says that Peter remembered what Jesus had said and he weeps! When Jesus needed Peter, His friend, the most Peter fails Him. Thankfully Jesus was a better friend that Peter. After His death on the cross and resurrection, women approach the tomb of Jesus unaware that He is risen. He appears to them and speaks to them. Listen to what He says!
TEXT: Mark 16:6-7
“Don’t be alarmed,” he said. “You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him. But go, tell his disciples and Peter, ‘He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.’”
Did you hear the push? Did you hear the encouragement? With 2 simple words Jesus throws Peter a lifeline. With 2 simple words Jesus lets Peter know he hasn't been disqualified by his bad day! With 2 words He lets Peter know that although he failed he isn't a failure!
Jesus singles him out and calls his name! Peters denial takes place and the Word says that he went and wept. Now with two words despair is dispelled.
A. Encouragement dispels despair.
We need to single some people out and encourage!
Encouragement causes us to believe the best about ourselves even in the middle of our worst moment. A friend's encouragement pulls the best out of us.
Was that 2 word push important? Did it have an impact? Fast forward to what we as Pentecostals point to as the pinnacle day of our experience Acts 2 and who is center stage? Who takes the mic and with power and confidence preaches a message that causes 3000 people to run to Jesus?
The one and only scared, distancing, less than best friend Peter!
The reason encouragement is such a crucial characteristic to find in a friend and to exhibit as friend is because . . .
B. Encouragement produces courage (just ask Ross . . . just ask Peter . . . just ask anyone who has risked due to the push of a true friend.)
Encouragement is the seed that births courage.
Too many of us keep and allow friends to remain dis-couraged. Our world is full of discouraged people. It is time for us to intentionally open up our mouths and pour in massive doses of courage! In-courage! Push! You aren't just causing someone to feel good you are pouring life into them!
In fact, I don't know if you realize this or not because for some reason some of us have come to the conclusion that we our spiritual gift is to be a wet blanket, dream killer when in fact . . . .
C. We are appointed & anointed to encourage!
Hebrews 3:13 tells us this is our daily task and also speaks to the power of encouragement!
Hebrews 3:13 - But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.
In a society that is obsessed with the negative, tabloids and facebook filled with accusations, rumors, the dirt and the critical we are on an assignment from God to insert courage so that our friends aren't hardened and lose hope! This isn't about gifting. This is about anointing and obeying our God appointed role in people's lives.
Are you on assignment? Have you allowed that anointing to operate in you?
In her fictional piece, written in 1976, Elizabeth Ballard composed the story of Jean Thompson, a 5th grade teacher who stood in front of her class on the first day of school and told her students a lie. She looked at her pupils and told them that she loved them all the same, and that she would treat them all alike. And that was impossible because there in front of her, slumped in his seat on the third row, was a little boy named Teddy Stallard.
Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed he didn't play well with the other children, his clothes were wrinkled and he constantly needed a bath.
It got to the point during the first few months that she would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, marking bold X's and marking the 'F' at the top of the paper biggest of all. Teddy was a sullen little boy, and nobody seemed to enjoy him.
At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's records. She put Teddy's off until the last. But when she opened his file, she was in for a SURPRISE. His first-grade teacher had written: "Teddy is a bright, inquisitive child with a ready laugh. He does work neatly and has good manners.... he is a joy to be around." His second-grade teacher wrote: "Teddy is an excellent student and is well-liked by his classmates - but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."
His third-grade teacher recorded: "Teddy continues to work hard but his mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."
Teddy's fourth-grade teacher wrote: "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and sometimes sleeps in class. He is tardy and could become a problem."
By now Mrs. Thompson realized the problem. Christmas break was approaching. As is the tradition,her students brought her presents, all wrapped in ribbon and bright paper, except for Teddy's, which was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper of a cut up grocery bag. Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents and some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet, with some of the stones missing, and a bottle of cologne that was one quarter full. She stifled the laughter. Then she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and she dabbled some of the perfume behind the other wrist.
At the end of the day, as the other children joyously raced from the room, Teddy stayed behind, just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my mom used to." As soon as Teddy left, Mrs. Thompson knelt at her desk and cried for a least an hour. On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and spelling. Instead she began to teach children.
Jean Thompson paid particular attention to one they all called Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she ENCOURAGED him, the faster he responded and, on days that there would be an important test, Mrs. Thompson would remember the cologne that Teddy had given her. By the end of the year Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class. He had also become the "pet" of the teacher who had once vowed she loved of her students exactly the same. A year later she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that of all the teachers he'd had in elementary school, she was his favorite. Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He wrote that as he finished high school, third in his class, and that she was still his favorite teacher. Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, that he'd stayed in school, and would graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson she was still his favorite teacher. Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. He told her that she was still his favorite teacher but that now his name was a little longer. The letter was signed, "Theodore F. Stallard, M.D."
The story doesn't end yet. There was another letter that spring. Teddy said that he had met a girl and was to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit in the pew usually reserved for the mother of the groom.
Who is your Teddy? Who are you assigned to to look past failure and the dirt of their life and speak life/courage and hope into? Until we encourage they will remain devoid of courage.
That is why we wanted you to join us on "Friend Day!" We wanted you to know we believe in you. We encourage you to rise up to your best! We wanted to thank you for encouraging us.
The greatest encouragement we can give you is to share what we have found with you. We want to encourage you to know Jesus!
