One of the winter events.... that I often did as a Youth Group leader .....at Saint Andrew ....in Mentor Ohio ....was a snowball toss .
You would pick a partner ....and start ....about 3 feet apart.
You would throw... or toss the snowball ....to your partner.
If they caught the snowball ....you would each take ...one step backward.
The winner would be the pair ...who caught the snowball ....at the farthest distance.
Well ....after about 45 minutes of this game ....it deteriorated ....into a new game called ..... kill the youth group leader
Thirty to one ....are not very good odds ....though I did not go down.... without a fight.
Snowballs though small ....have the ability to cause delight ....or destruction.... depending on.... how they are used.
Beloved .... Likewise, ....our words have the same power .... they can bring joy..... or cause despair.
Proverbs 18:21 puts it this way: (Slow) "The tongue has the power of life and death..." NIV
The stakes are high.
Your words can either speak life, ..... or your words ....can speak death.
Our tongues ....can build others up, ....or they can tear them down.
It has been said .....that great minds discuss ideas,... average minds discuss events, .... and small minds.... discuss people.
The church that James is writing to ....was full of small-minded people..... who gossiped about each other ....and tore one another apart .....with their tongues.
We are quick to avoid murder,... stealing,.... and drunkenness,.... but we often assassinate fellow believers ....and leave destruction in our wake ....by the way ....we use our tongues.
Husbands have stabbed their wives ....with words that are as sharp as daggers.
And wives ....have lashed out with tongues.... that cut and pierce.
Parents have devastated their children.... by repeated blasts..... of venom.
Children have exploded at their parents..... with volleys that have leveled the family..... like a bomb.
Listen to what is written in the first chapter of James letter: BIBLE 19 You must understand this,.... my beloved:..... let everyone be quick to listen,.... slow to speak, ....slow to anger;...... 26 If any think they are religious, ....and do not bridle their tongues.... but deceive their hearts, ...their religion ....is worthless." END James 1:19 James 1:26 NRSV
If you and I launch verbal snowballs of destruction, .....they will have devastating consequences .....on others. (Pause)
Notice how James connects sins of the tongue ..... with sins .....of the body.
He does this...... because our words.... usually lead ... to corresponding deeds.
Proverbs 21:23 says "He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity." ASV
The tongue can express or repress; ......offend or befriend;...... affirm or alienate; ......build or belittle; ...comfort or criticize; .....delight or destroy.
In verses 3-12, .... James uses a number of different word pictures of the tongue .....to help us see ......how small, ....yet how powerful ...it is:
Four of them are:... A bit .....A rudder ..... A fire .... A spring
(1 finger) The first metaphor is the bit that is put into a horse's mouth by its owner....or its trainer.
This relatively small piece of metal ....can control a very powerful animal, .... directing the horse ....to the right.....to the left...... or to stop.
When the bit is pulled back by the rider,..... it presses against the horse's tongue..... causing it ....to stop.
(2 finger) ......James also compares the tongue.... to a rudder.... on a boat.
Just as a small rudder ...can control the direction of a large ship.... so too, ....the tongue... can control our lives.
The bit controls the wild nature of a horse; .....the rudder must fight the winds ...and currents ....that would drive ....the ship ....off course.
Both the bit and the rudder ....must be under the control .... of a strong hand.
After speaking to ....the power of a bit ....in the mouth of a horse, .....and the power of a small rudder.... to steer a large ship, ......James goes on to uses the image of (3 fingers) ....fire James 3:5-6
Just like a small spark can ignite ....an entire forest, ....so too words that flow out of tongues ....can corrupt lives ......and shipwreck families.
James is pretty strong here.... as he tells us ....that our tongues ....are set on fire..... by hell ....itself.
When I was in 4th grade ....a few of my friends and I.... were out behind the neighborhood grocery store ....where we built a .....magnificent fort.
We decided it needed a fireplace.... So we started a nice fire ....that proceeded not only to burn the fort to the ground ....but to also bring ....the fire department..... to the scene.
A little spark ....had caused much damage ....not only to the fort......but to my backside ....after my parents .....were finished!
Like a careless match thrown on dry wood, .... so to ....our words ......can consume people.
When sparks fly ....in our homes,.... firestorms can erupt ..... creating a blazing inferno..... that leaves deep scars .....and lasting pain. (Pause)
Just a small word ...can be so very..... devastating.
The singer Karen Carpenter died of heart failure at the age of 32 .....brought on by years of fighting an eating disorder, .....afterwards
It came to light.... that her fatal obsession with her weight ....was triggered by a single reviewer's comment.
When referring to Karen, .....this man called her ...."Richard's ....chubby sister."
While I am sure ....there were other factors ....attributing to Karen Carpenter's struggles, .... this one comment .... unleashed a flurry.... of self-doubt. (Pause)
Remember the saying,.... "Sticks and stones may break my bones,.... but words ....can never hurt me?"
I do not know who came up with that line .... but we all know ....that it is simply.... not true.
Words can break our hearts. ....Words can break ....our spirits.
Broken bones can heal with time, ....but a broken spirit ..... caused by words of death, ..... is not so quickly ....repaired.
How many people have you maimed or killed .....with your words?
Beloved.... Is your tongue .... To quick to criticize?
Do your words build up .... or do they tear down? (Long Pause)
James now draws another word picture to help us see ....that it should be impossible for us .......to both bless and blast.... out of ...the same mouth.
He asks this penetrating question "Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?" James 3:11
James is saying .... that just as it is impossible for a spring to have both sweet and sour water,
So too ....it is inconceivable ...for the tongue of a mature believer ...to send forth both.... righteousness and rumors; ...... blessing and blasting, ...... compliments and cursing.
James is calling us .... to be consistent.
What comes out of our mouths ....is a reflection.... of what ....is in our hearts.
Beloved .....Here are some actions ....that will help us..... tame the tongue.
(1 Finger) The Book of Proverbs has 31 chapters, one for each day of the month.
Why not make a decision .... to read a chapter each day, ....along with a chapter..... from James letter?
After one month, ....you will have read through the entire book of Proverbs once ..... and the book of James .....Six times!
Almost every chapter in Proverbs .....has something about the tongue:
Make a Commitment ....to be ....in God's Word.
(2 finger) Think First. .... "Are your words flames.... or are they ....flowers?"
Using the acronym.... THINK, T-H-I-N-K......try to ask these 5 questions before you speak.
"T" Is it True?
Remember this rule about gossip: ...."The more interesting it is, ...the more likely it is .....to be false."...... "T" is it true!
"H" Is it Helpful?
Will your words..... help bring about a solution.... A resolution to the problem?..... H ....is it Helpful.
"I" ......Is it Inspiring?
Will your words build up ...or will they tear down? Are Your Words ....inspiring?
"N".... Is it Necessary?
Do we have to say anything at all?
Is the comment really .....Necessary?
"K" ....Is it Kind?
Are your words based ...on a heart that truly cares for others?
Is your heart filled with Kindness?.... Is it Kind.
THINK.... "T" Is it True? - "H" Is it Helpful? - "I" Is it Inspiring? - "N" Is it Necessary? -"K" Is it Kind?
T-H-I-N-K..... before you speak.
(3 fingers) Talk Less. REPEAT
Your chances of causing destruction with your words .....are directly proportional .....to the amount of time ....you spend ....with your mouth ....open.
Abraham Lincoln said, ....."It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, .... than to open your mouth .....and remove all doubt."
President Calvin Coolidge said,.... "I have never been hurt by anything..... I did not say."
Proverbs 10:19 puts it this way: "When words are many, sin is present, .... but he ....who holds his tongue .....is wise."
I read about a woman ....who had a very serious throat condition.
The doctor told her ....that her vocal cords needed total rest .... she was forbidden to talk ....for Six months!
With a husband and 6 children, ....this seemed impossible, ..... but she did ...as the doctor instructed.
When she needed the kids ....she blew a whistle.
Whenever she needed to communicate ....she wrote it out ....on pads of paper.
After six months, ....her voice returned.
When asked what it was like to communicate only in writing, .....she said this:
"You'd be surprised how many notes I crumpled up and threw into the trash..... before I gave them.... to anyone.
Seeing my words ....before anyone heard them ...had an effect ...that I do not think ....I can ever forget."
While we might not be able to stop speaking for six months, ....we can learn to talk less ....by putting a muzzle ....on the muscle .... in our mouths.
(4 Fingers) Build up others.
The Scriptures constantly remind us ....to encourage one another .... with our words.
Someone once said ....that we shouldn't complain about our spouse's faults .... because if it weren't for those faults ..... they could have married someone ......so much better!
Beloved ....Do you find yourself speaking words of life.... or are you speaking words of death?
Chuck Swindoll tells the story about a man he went to seminary with.
This man had a bright red birthmark ....that covered ....half his face.
After Chuck got to know him,.... he finally had the courage ...to ask him ....what had happened.
His friend answered ...by telling him what his dad ....had told him:
"Son, that birthmark ...is where an angel kissed your face.
You have it ...so that I can always pick you out .....of the crowd."
Swindoll's friend ...then turned to him and said, "You know,.... I almost feel sorry ...for those.... who don't have.... a birthmark."
That Father spoke words of life to his son .... and those words ......transformed a life.
If you want to be a dispenser ...of life words ....instead of a dispenser of words of death, ....you need to be right ....with God.
Paul tells us how to be right with God: BIBLE "If you confess with your mouth ....Jesus is Lord ....and believe in your heart ...that God raised Him from the dead, .... you will be saved. For it is with your heart ...that you believe ...and are justified, ...and it is with your mouth (Repeat).... that you confess ....and are saved." END Romans 10:9-10:
Are you speaking words of death ....or are you speaking words of life?
Beloved .....Choose life....Speak life.
Is it True? - Is it Helpful? - Is it Inspiring? - Is it Necessary? - Is it Kind?
Beloved Think! .....Speak Life.
It is time..... to be mature men and women ... of the cross.
To Be open to the transforming power of the Holy Spirit.
To Be conformed to the image of Christ
It is time ....to Think
It is time.... To speak Life!!
Amen and Amen
Much of this Message is based off a Sermon by Brian Bill titled ' Taming the tongue" and I commend it to you.
Help: I retired in November 2017 and am attempting to supplement my income by sharing on Sermoncentral. If this Message has been helpful to you, please consider a nominal donation: Send to The Rev. Jeff Smead 11725 Regent Park Drive Chardon Ohio 44024. Blessed To Be A Blessing.
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