Civil Wars Pt. 2 - The Art of War
I. Introduction The most costly war in our history in loss of life was the Civil War. Estimates put the death toll of the Civil War somewhere between 650-850,000 men. These were not soldiers from a foreign invader. These were not troops from some external conquering force. Father's taking aim and shooting at sons. Sons lighting fuses on cannons that would kill their father. Brothers impaling brothers on the steal of their bayonets. The civil war was not civil. Households were divided. Families were torn apart. Sides chosen.
The Civil War that took place in the Garden of Eden that disrupted utopia and the Civil War in our nation reveals that we don't navigate relationships well. Even though from day one we have been designed and created for relationship we have reverted to what we were trained to do in middle school . . . we either hit back or vacate. In taking either of these actions we allow isolation to imprison us and as we said last week we block our prayers, our power, our presentation and our we leave our God assigned posts. It is time to learn to fight fair so that when we have the inevitable wars they are civil.
So let's continue today as we discuss "The Art of War!" There is an art to having civil wars. I want to remind you of a few pointers today.
TEXT: 2 Kings 6:8-14, 18-23 Now the king of Aram was at war with Israel. After conferring with his officers, he said, “I will set up my camp in such and such a place.” The man of God sent word to the king of Israel: “Beware of passing that place, because the Arameans are going down there.” So the king of Israel checked on the place indicated by the man of God. Time and again Elisha warned the king, so that he was on his guard in such places. This enraged the king of Aram. He summoned his officers and demanded of them, “Tell me! Which of us is on the side of the king of Israel?” “None of us, my lord the king,” said one of his officers, “but Elisha, the prophet who is in Israel, tells the king of Israel the very words you speak in your bedroom.” “Go, find out where he is,” the king ordered, “so I can send men and capture him.” The report came back: “He is in Dothan.” Then he sent horses and chariots and a strong force there. They went by night and surrounded the city. As the enemy came down toward him, Elisha prayed to the Lord, “Strike this army with blindness.” So he struck them with blindness, as Elisha had asked. Elisha told them, “This is not the road and this is not the city. Follow me, and I will lead you to the man you are looking for.” And he led them to Samaria. After they entered the city, Elisha said, “Lord, open the eyes of these men so they can see.” Then the Lord opened their eyes and they looked, and there they were, inside Samaria. When the king of Israel saw them, he asked Elisha, “Shall I kill them, my father? Shall I kill them?” “Do not kill them,” he answered. “Would you kill those you have captured with your own sword or bow? Set food and water before them so that they may eat and drink and then go back to their master.” So he prepared a great feast for them, and after they had finished eating and drinking, he sent them away, and they returned to their master. So the bands from Aram stopped raiding Israel’s territory.
2 Samuel 2:17-23 (highlights) The battle that day was very fierce, and Abner and the Israelites were defeated by David’s men. The three sons of Zeruiah were there: Joab, Abishai and Asahel. Now Asahel was as fleet-footed as a wild gazelle. He chased Abner, turning neither to the right nor to the left as he pursued him. Abner looked behind him and asked, “Is that you, Asahel?” “It is,” he answered. Then Abner said to him, “Turn aside to the right or to the left; take on one of the young men and strip him of his weapons.” But Asahel would not stop chasing him. Again Abner warned Asahel, “Stop chasing me! Why should I strike you down? How could I look your brother Joab in the face?” But Asahel refused to give up the pursuit; so Abner thrust the butt of his spear into Asahel’s stomach, and the spear came out through his back. (Do I need to stop and say there are some confrontations you should not pursue and too often we run right past the repeated warning signs to our own demise?) He fell there and died on the spot. And every man stopped when he came to the place where Asahel had fallen and died.
2 Samuel 3:1 - The war between the house of Saul and the house of David lasted a long time. David grew stronger and stronger, while the house of Saul grew weaker and weaker.
12-13 - Then Abner sent messengers on his behalf to say to David, “Whose land is it? Make an agreement with me, and I will help you bring all Israel over to you.” “Good,” said David. “I will make an agreement with you. But I demand one thing of you: Do not come into my presence unless you bring Michal daughter of Saul when you come to see me.”
23 - When Joab and all the soldiers with him arrived, he was told that Abner son of Ner had come to the king and that the king had sent him away and that he had gone in peace.
27 - Now when Abner returned to Hebron, Joab took him aside into an inner chamber, as if to speak with him privately. And there, to avenge the blood of his brother Asahel, Joab stabbed him in the stomach, and he died.
32 - They buried Abner in Hebron, and the king wept aloud at Abner’s tomb. All the people wept also.
1. Ask before you strike. I have read to you two very interesting accounts in Scripture that teach us the art of war. The first is an account that shows how Elisha thwarts the king of Aram. The king is upset and sends a massive army to capture Elisha but the tables are turned and the army is struck blind. Elisha leads them into certain death. But I want you to notice the first thing we must learn if we are going to war right. The king of Israel does something that Joab did not do in the second account. Joab is angry and wants to get revenge because Abner had killed his brother. His thirst for blood caused him to fail to do what the King of Israel did.
To fight right you have to ask before you strike!
If we are going to fight right, then we must have an authority in our life like God and often someone He assigns to our life that we ask before we strike. Why? We often want to respond with fist when we should respond with feast. You certainly need someone in life who can point out places of ambush so that you can avoid war. However you also need someone you can turn to and say I know there is an ambush coming or I have been attacked, someone has declared war on me, they have me surrounded so what should I do? Should I fight back or feed them?
The reason we need to learn the right way to do it from the king and the wrong way from Joab is that very often your treatment of an enemy determines your future. The king did it right and rather than sharing a fist he gave them a feast and Scripture says they never bothered the Israelites again. Some of us perpetuate war when if we would ask before we strike we might just broker a life-long peace and avoid a life-long curse.
We don't do that because we have convinced ourselves that God is upset with who we are upset with. In our mind we have convinced ourselves that God is ok with you being on the outs with someone. We convince ourselves He is mad with who we are mad with.
That is what Joab did. Even though he got word that David had just signed a peace treaty with Abner he thought David would still be just as upset as he was and therefore would approve of his ambush. Instead he discovered a truth we need to know . . . just because he had a grudge didn't mean the King held the same grudge.
So many of us are in love with David's cries for God to kill our enemies. We read the Psalms and land on His cries for justice and retribution and we believe God is as mad at them as we are. The only problem is that those folks are at home praying same prayers about you. And it is a good thing God doesn't cut off everyone we beg him to cut off. Because if He did we would end up in mourning and in trouble because some of the people we want Him to destroy He will reposition later as a bridge we need to cross to our blessing/destiny/future! (i.e. Moses kills Egyptian and Israelites want him cut off. Good thing God didn't agree.)
Quit praying for God to kill folks He wants to use for your good! Ask before you strike!
2. Bless rather than battle. The King blessed his enemy rather than battle his enemy. The art of war is to respond like The King. We think because we have kept our hands to ourselves we are good. We didn't physically strike. We have been hands off but we can't keep our mouth off.
The wise man told us in Proverbs 15:1, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words cause quarrels." In other words, we talk ourselves into wars that we wouldn't have to have. Notice that we always focus on soft and forget answer. We focus on soft as giving in. Just cave and take the slap. Soft speaks to demeanor and attitude but notice an answer is still given. We often cause people to miss a correct and resolving answer because we fail to add soft and use harsh instead. Too many of us know don't know how to answer soft because we just want to be right at all cost! And in the win you are in a constant state of offense and war. There are casualties everywhere you go. Fall out at home. Fall out at work. Fall out at church. You may be right but you may also die lonely and bitter. Sometimes you need to prepare a meal in the presence of your enemies. If you would bless you wouldn't have to battle.
Paul affirms this when in Ephesians 4:2-3, 31-32 he says, "And mark that you do this with humility and discipline—not in fits and starts, but steadily, pouring yourselves out for each other in acts of love, alert at noticing differences and quick at mending fences. Make a clean break with all cutting, backbiting, profane talk. Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you."
Too many of us keep wars alive simply because we won't shut our mouth. The offense has fixated and stagnated you. Can't move past it. You quit operating on B.C. and A.D. and started living on B.O. and A.O. (Before offense and after offense). Your future is attached to and altered because you can't move past and resolve! We know that because you keep talking about it.
Learn to bless and you will discover that the battle will end. There is another reason that we must deal with our mouth and that is because . . .
The only thing more deadly and imprisoning than an offense is a shared offense.
If you read the entire account in 2 Samuel you discover that after Joab kills Abner David pronounces a curse on Joab's entire family and says his family forever will have someone who has a running sore or leprosy or who leans on a crutch or who falls by the sword or who lacks food.” Notice Joab's family even into future generations share the cost and impact of holding that grudge.
If we don't learn to get over offense only two things can and will happen. 1. We either forgive or fester and if we choose to fester then we 2. spread offense.
I have noticed that offended people like offended people. They rally and they infect one another.
One of the most dangerous offenses is not your offense it is the one you pick up or the one you give to someone else.
It is dangerous for you to share an offense because when you finally move past the offense they stay in bondage to it. If you share an offense you are literally putting someone in bondage and impacting their future.
We see this in young married couples. Husband offends wife by forgetting to lift lid. Fight ensues. Make up is great. The dilemma is she ragged on him to mom and dad. So now mom and dad pick up offense and wedge is placed between and their new son. Old "sprinkle" over there don't even care about my little baby doll. If he really loved her and was a good man he would lift the lid.
Listen . . . don't offload your offense and don't let someone offload their offense to you. Refuse to carry it. It's not your circus and those aren't your monkeys. (Someone left church cause someone here hurt their friend and the friend offloaded on them.) I know you love them but just cause they are hurt doesn't mean you have to be.
Proverbs 17:9 - Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.
If you share your offense you can be the cause of someone missing their blessing. You cause them to vacate the very relationship they needed for promotion, destiny, and blessing.
Forgiveness is how God transforms our pain, so we don’t transfer our pain.
If you don't deal with your rival you will pass down grudges, pain and bitterness. Bitterness is deadly! Since you can only control your healing if you share your offense, then you may find healing but be responsible for making others sick!
Paul in 2 Corinthians 2 is addressing an offense that a brother has caused in the Corinthian church and so in verse 9-11 he says, "The focus of my letter wasn’t on punishing the offender but on getting you to take responsibility for the health of the church. So if you forgive him, I forgive him. Don’t think I’m carrying around a list of personal grudges. The fact is that I’m joining in with your forgiveness, as Christ is with us, guiding us. After all, we don’t want to unwittingly give Satan an opening for yet more mischief—we’re not oblivious to his sly ways!
Offense gives an opening to Satan! You can choose to join forgiveness or join offense. If we share offenses we are giving our enemy an opening for destruction.
How do we fight fair? Ask before you strike! Bless rather than battle. Guard your mouth and keep your offenses to yourself and operate in forgiveness.
Prayer - You want to strike or have struck. You have picked up a shared offense. You need to find forgiveness.
