BOOK OF RUTH:
“GOD OF OUR CHOICES”
Ruth 1:1-22
INTRODUCTION READ Ruth 1:1-22
“In the days when the judges ruled, there was a famine in the land, and a man from Bethlehem in Judah, together with his wife and two sons, went to live for a while in the country of Moab. 2 The man's name was Elimelech, his wife's name Naomi, and the names of his two sons were Mahlon and Kilion. They were Ephrathites from Bethlehem, Judah. And they went to Moab and lived there. 3 Now Elimelech, Naomi's husband, died, and she was left with her two sons. 4 They married Moabite women, one named Orpah and the other Ruth. After they had lived there about ten years, 5 both Mahlon and Kilion also died, and Naomi was left without her two sons and her husband. 6 When she heard in Moab that the LORD had come to the aid of his people by providing food for them, Naomi and her daughters-in-law prepared to return home from there. 7 With her two daughters-in-law she left the place where she had been living and set out on the road that would take them back to the land of Judah. 8 Then Naomi said to her two daughters-in-law, "Go back, each of you, to your mother's home. May the LORD show kindness to you, as you have shown to your dead and to me. 9 May the LORD grant that each of you will find rest in the home of another husband." Then she kissed them and they wept aloud 10 and said to her, "We will go back with you to your people." 11 But Naomi said, "Return home, my daughters. Why would you come with me? Am I going to have any more sons, who could become your husbands? 12 Return home, my daughters; I am too old to have another husband. Even if I thought there was still hope for me-- even if I had a husband tonight and then gave birth to sons-- 13 would you wait until they grew up? Would you remain unmarried for them? No, my daughters. It is more bitter for me than for you, because the LORD's hand has gone out against me!" 14 At this they wept again. Then Orpah kissed her mother-in-law good-by, but Ruth clung to her. 15 "Look," said Naomi, "your sister-in-law is going back to her people and her gods. Go back with her." 16 But Ruth replied, "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. 17 Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me." 18 When Naomi realized that Ruth was determined to go with her, she stopped urging her. 19 So the two women went on until they came to Bethlehem. When they arrived in Bethlehem, the whole town was stirred because of them, and the women exclaimed, "Can this be Naomi?" 20 "Don't call me Naomi," she told them. "Call me Mara, because the Almighty has made my life very bitter. 21 I went away full, but the LORD has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi? The LORD has afflicted me; the Almighty has brought misfortune upon me." 22 So Naomi returned from Moab accompanied by Ruth the Moabitess, her daughter-in-law, arriving in Bethlehem as the barley harvest was beginning.”
Life is full of choices. Each and every day we make choices large and small which impact ourselves, our families, our work, our finances, our health, and dozens of other aspects of our lives. Every choice we make has a ripple effect on us and those around us. Chapter 1 of the Book of Ruth is a historical record of the choices one particular family makes. In this chapter we find five choices that this family makes which impact their lives in huge ways.
First, we find that Israel was experiencing a drought which meant no rain, little crops, and hardship in living day-to-day. Elimelech, the head of this particular family, makes a choice to leave his home in Bethlehem and seek refuge in a foreign land where the drought and hardship was less. I am not sure how he made this decision, but I am sure the physical wellbeing of his wife and two sons was heavy on his heart. (verses 1-3)
Second, we find that the two sons of Elimelech, Mahlon and Kilion make a huge life choice and choose to marry while they are in the foreign land of Moab. They meet two girls, Orpah and Ruth, and proceed to fall in love and get married. They choose to marry from the girls that are around them rather than wait to marry once they returned to Israel. (verses 4-5)
Third, after the death of her husband and two sons, Naomi hears that the drought in Israel has come to an end and life is not so difficult. In fact, the Book of Ruth shares with us the God provided for His people and relieved their suffering. Naomi makes the decision not to stay in Moab where she has made a home for more than 10 years, but to return home to Bethlehem and forge a life there. (verses 6-7)
Fourth, Naomi realizes that she has two devoted young daughters-in-law who need not experience widowed life in Bethlehem. Daily life for widows in this time was extremely difficult. Naomi encourages both young women to return to their family homes and marry someone else. She encourages them to seek out another man who would love them and care for them. She tells them that their lives can take another path than the one that she is trodding. Orpah decides, for whatever reason, to leave Naomi and return home. Ruth decides, for whatever reason, to stay with Naomi and make a home with her in Bethlehem. (verses 8-18)
Fifth, and perhaps most controversial as a ‘choice,’ when Naomi returns home to Bethlehem, we find her absolutely angry and bitter with God. She has made a choice to hate God for the loss of her husband and two sons. In fact, her unforgiveness, anger, and bitterness has sunk so deep into her heart and bones that she asks them to call her “Mara” and not “Naomi.” Call me a name that means “Bitter” and not the name that means “Pleasant.” (verses 19-22)
So we have five choices in Chapter 1 of Ruth that are the background for the events of the rest of the book. We are not going to look at all of the choices this week, but we are going to focus on two of the choices presented in Chapter 1 which are very different in nature. I’d like us to look at one choice that is clear and a choice that is unclear.
I. THE CLEAR CHOICE: Mahlon and Kilion Get Married
One of the choices presented in Chapter 1 is the choice of Mahlon and Kilion, sons of Elimelech and Naomi, to marry Moabite women while they are away from their homeland rather than wait until they returned to their homeland of Israel. We don’t know how it happened…
… perhaps it was a chance meeting at the local well
… perhaps they were next door neighbors
… perhaps Naomi was in a knitting group with the mothers of the two girls
However Mahlon and Kilion met Orpah and Ruth, the relationship progressed to marriage. Now, as we look at the situation, was this a good or bad decision? Was is ok for Mahlon and Kilion to marry when they did or should they have waited? If you happen to know how the rest of the book (the rest of the story) plays out, did these two boys make a good decision or a bad decision?
[ASK CONGREGATON]: What do you all think?
Was this a good decision? (raise hands) Was this a bad decision? (raise hands)
Mahlon and Kilion made a clearly wrong decision when it came to marrying Orpah and Ruth. How can I say that? How can I possibly judge that? How can I say that a decision these two young men made was clearly wrong? I can say that solely based on God’s Word because God has already spoken on this matter and given His Divine opinion.
Deuteronomy 7:1-4 is a passage in the Old Testament which bears directly on the situation that Mahlon and Kilion find themselves in. In fact, Genesis 24:3, Genesis 34:14, Joshua 23:12, 1 Kings 11:2, and Ezra 9:14 all say exactly the same thing. Deuteronomy 7:1-4 says, “When the LORD your God brings you into the land you are entering to possess and drives out before you many nations-- the Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites, seven nations larger and stronger than you-- 2 and when the LORD your God has delivered them over to you and you have defeated them, then you must destroy them totally. Make no treaty with them, and show them no mercy. 3 Do not intermarry with them. Do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons, 4 for they will turn your sons away from following me to serve other gods, and the LORD's anger will burn against you and will quickly destroy you.”
The Lord was quite clear on several occasions in the Old Testament what His will was with regards to marriage and the choices the people of Israel would make in their lives. God laid down a warning over and over in the Scriptures that His will for them was to marry someone of “like faith” which at that time happened to be those who were Israelites. God gives this command for one reason. Danger is present because the person without faith will negatively influence the person who has faith. To say it another way, the person who has a different faith other than one that focuses on God, will influence a person away from God. God knew that intermarriage would lead to turning away from Him and it makes Him angry. God knows human nature and the pervasiveness of doubt and so commanded His people to remove the temptation of not marrying someone outside of their faith.
In case you were wondering, the New Testament says exactly the same thing in 1 Corinthians 7:29 and 2 Corinthians 6:14. These verses echo the Word of God from the Old Testament. 2 Corinthians 6:14 says, “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”
May I submit to you this morning that if God says “No” or “Thou shalt not” and we do it anyway, that is at the very core of it a “bad decision.” It also happens to be a “sin.” God said “No” and they did it anyway. God said, “Thou Shalt Not” and they did it anyway. I can clearly say based on God’s Word alone that Mahlon and Kilion made a clear mistake in their lives because they married women outside of their faith. It is a bad decision and wrong for a person of faith to marry a person who has no faith or is of a different faith. That is not my opinion. That is Old Testament and New Testament Truth.
II. THE UNCLEAR CHOICE: Orpah and Ruth Go or Stay
The other choice we will look at this morning presented in Chapter 1, is the choice of the two daughters-in-law to either stay with Naomi and leave for Bethlehem or leave her and stay in their homeland. The sense we get about Orpah and Ruth from Naomi’s statements in Chapter 1 is that the two women are still of the age that they could be eligible bachelorettes if they let the men know they were interested. Naomi encourages both young women to return to their family homes. So here we have a choice. Should Orpah stay with Naomi or go home? Should Ruth stay with Naomi or go home? Is it a good decision to go home and stay in Moab or a good decision to stay with Naomi and go to Bethlehem?
In the course of the chapter, we discover that Orpah “kissed her mother-in-law good-by” (Ruth 1:14) and Ruth decided to stay. In fact, Ruth makes a wonderful declaration of faith in her decision to stay with Naomi. Ruth 1:16-17, “Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. 17 Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me." One lady left. One lady stayed.
[ASK CONGREGATON]: What do you all think?
Was this a good decision for Orpah? (raise hands) Was this a bad decision for Orpah? (raise hands)
Was this a good decision for Ruth? (raise hands) Was this a bad decision for Ruth? (raise hands)
As I look at the choices in Chapter 1, I honestly cannot tell. There is a passage in the New Testament that summarizes the Law in the Old Testament that bears directly on this decision that Orpah and Ruth make. Romans 7:1-2 says, “Do you not know, brothers-- for I am speaking to men who know the law-- that the law has authority over a man only as long as he lives? 2 For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage.” We see clearly in the Bible that the relationship of marriage ends at death. The responsibility of the partner who is still alive ends at death. This is why Naomi did not require these two ladies to go with her back to Bethlehem.
Neither Orpah nor Ruth was under any sort of obligation to Naomi. As I look at the choice of Orpah and Ruth, it is honestly an unclear decision that could go either way… and it does go both ways. Orpah leaves. Ruth stays. There are no moral issues in play. There are no loyalty or integrity issues at play because Naomi genuinely wants the ladies to return home.
III. PRINCIPLES OF MAKING GODLY CHOICES
As we think about the choices of the folks in Ruth Chapter 1, I’d like us to think about our choices. I want us to think about the choices that we have made in the past. Think about some of the choices that we are faced with right now. As we do that and as we look at Ruth Chapter 1, we will discover how to make good Godly decisions in the future. You see, when it comes to our choices, there can be only one God. It is either us… or Him. We are the god of our choices or He is the God of our choices.
Moving Education Job Changes
Surgeries Marriage Issues Debt and Finances
Hobbies & Free time Dating Relationships Buying and Selling
Vacations Repairs Discipline of Children
As people of faith, we all face choices that are clear and those that are unclear. I believe in Ruth Chapter 1 we find a few principles that will help us as we navigate the waters of life.
Principle 1: Always Look to God’s Word. You will notice that in each of the decisions that we talked about, the Bible had some kind of direction. For Mahlon and Kilion, the Bible told them “not” to proceed with their relationships. For Orpah and Ruth, the Bible told them that they were free from moral responsibilities to their mother-in-law. The Bible is our inerrant divinely given guide for this life.
ILLUSTRATION… Who I Should Marry (p)
When I was 16 years old I met a young woman in a Sunday School class in Baumholder, Germany because our dads were both in the Army and both stationed overseas. We were friends, though as I remember it, there was often flirtation. We graduated high school and went our separate ways. She went to school at USF in Florida and I went to Bible College in Tennessee. As we got older in our college years, who we would marry became important to each of us. The Bible was our guide for each of us. As someone going into the ministry, I knew that I had to marry someone who had deep roots in the Christian faith and would be a wonderful helpmate for me in life and in ministry. The Bible was clear that I could not just marry any ‘ol person I wanted… God has a say. She knew she should marry a Christian man through the Scriptures and through prayer God laid it on her heart that she would be a minister’s wife. I happened to be the only minister-in-training she knew. That is providence! Through the guidance of God’s Word and the love of God’s Word, I believe God brought Kelly and I together.
Principle 2: Pray for Understanding. There might be times in your life that you have no idea what the right decision is or which way to turn. Right seems as good as left. Yes is as fine of an answer as no. Up could be a good decision and down could be as well. When you don’t have any idea what to do, then it is important to pray to God for understanding. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” When we don’t know which way to go, praying for understanding or praying that God would help us make the right decision is good.
ILLUSTRATION… School for the Kids (p)
About 5 years ago, Kelly and I were faced with a decision. Our kids were getting older and we were beginning to think past elementary school towards middle school. Middle School years are hard sometimes. To be honest, which school your kid goes to I believe, at least in this instance, was not a “thus sayest the Lord” situation. I don’t think there was a divinely given yes or no. We were trying to do what was best for our kids and there were so many issues that we had to think through. Praying for understanding and discernment was key for Kelly and I as we tried to weigh all the options. As we prayed, a member of the church mentioned a charter school that was opening up downtown, and through prayer, we determined this school was best for us. I truly believe that because of praying, Kelly and I were able to make the right decision for our family that was totally up to us.
Principle 3: Step Out in Continual Love. Something caught my eye as I was reading Ruth Chapter 1. Elimelech decided to move to Moab because he loved his family and wanted them to survive. I noticed that when it came to making the decision to go back to Bethlehem and encourage the women to return to their homes, Naomi was acting in love. When Ruth decided to stay with Naomi, she was acting in love. It is never wrong to act in love.
In Mark 12:29-31 Jesus tells us, “The most important one," answered Jesus, "is this: 'Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. 30 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.' 31 The second is this: ‘ Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these." 1 Corinthians 13:13 reminds us, “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” And Philippians 1:9-10 says, “And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, 10 so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ…”
When you are trying to decide what to do, let honest love be your motivation because the path of love is one that will benefit yourself and those around you. When you are deciding what path to take, let love be your guide because the choice made in love is one that often is best. When you are unsure, act in love. When making decisions, think and act in love.
ILLUSTRATION… https://www.gagenmacdonald.com/2015/when-in-doubt-do-the-loving-thing/
Maril Gagen MacDonald is the founder of a business consulting firm in Chicago which had some interesting thoughts on love. She said: When in doubt, do the loving thing. Whenever I face a tough decision, in work or in life, I fall back on this motto… What does “doing the loving thing” mean in competitive business? It doesn’t mean playing the pushover or dodging hard decisions. It’s also not merely about being nice. I also believe there’s a big difference between being nice and being kind. Being nice can be surprisingly unkind. Too often niceness means taking the easy way out, acting more with an eye towards pleasing somebody instead of helping them move forward in a necessary way… Reminding yourself to “do the loving thing” taps into a deep part of yourself, unleashing powers much stronger than fear. Checking into true-north on your moral compass gives you tremendous courage. It returns you to your best, truest self – and it trumps all those lingering doubts instantly.”
CONCLUSION
NEXT WEEK
I wanted to let you know that next week we will be looking at the life of Naomi in the Book of Ruth. Remember, today we talked about her decision to be mad at God for her life. Next week, we’ll talk all about being resentfully angry with God. Don’t miss it.
