Topic: It's a Good Thing....1
Pro 18:22 says;
"Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD".
Note 3 - simple thoughts as we take this marital journey:
(a)- love & marriage were designed to add colour to life!
(b)- when what is meant 4 good, is not working out good, somebody may be working it wrongly!
- you can do what you know & what you don't know will still undo you!
Pro 14:1 says;
"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands".
(c)- a little adjustment in approach can sponsor a major breakthrough in marriage!
The AIM of this SERIES = help you to make your marital journey a testimony!
1st Week.... Dealing with "The Power of Love"
1st Service: I am or am I in love?
2nd Service: why some good people don't get the right people.
3rd Service: using courtship to set the marriage pattern.
4th Service: sometimes you just have to walk away.
1st Service: I AM OR AM I IN LOVE?
- love places another persons heart @ the centre of your heart!
Songs 8:6-7(NLT)
- but marriage goes beyond the feeling of love; marriage is about the covenant of love!
How do you know if this "love" thing will last?
Note 3 things to take home:
1. If it doesn't wow you, it's not Gods will!
- a lifetime is a long time & only good quality can qualify!
- if it is packaged 4u; it will be perfect in your eyes!
2. If your visions differ, you will suffer division!
- it's not everything you like that you can live with!
- Incompatibility in marriage is rooted in conflicting interests!
3. If it is of God, it cannot be ungodly!
- any passion that provokes God was not generated by grace!
- nothing that defiles is divine!
What do you do?
- pray this simple prayer: Lord I surrender my heart to you = lead it to where it will find rest!
- make a commitment to yourself to make your 1 choice your best choice!
2nd Service: WHY SOME GOOD PEOPLE DON'T GET THE RIGHT PEOPLE
- marital decisions are destiny determining decisions!
- the wrong foundational decision will affect your life's fundamental direction!
- a person can be very sincere & be sincerely wrong!
Note: 1 Sam 16:6-7(CEV)
Why do people make regrettable marital decisions?
Note 3 things to take home:
1. If you choose only by the natural; the unnatural will mess up your choice!
- you can have whatever you want, if you want it desperately enough to fight 4 it!
- but then, you can get what you want and not want what you get!
Pro 31:30(CEV)
- marital choice is not about the best option: it is about the right portion!
Pro 19:14(GNT)
2. If you allow your heart to overrule your head; your passion will overturn your purpose!
Jer 17:9
- your heart can hinder your discernment!
- when passion is not properly managed, it can poison perspective!
- you engage with the heart; but you examine with the head!
In 1 Thess 5:21 says;
"Prove all things; hold fast that which is good".
- you must use both your heart & your head!
What do you check?
- commitment to God
- character content
- course of destiny
3. If you don't resist strange forces; you will be forced into strange decisions!
There are 3 evil parties you must deal with in marriage:
- well intentioned but misguided family & friends!
- manipulative prophets & spiritual confusionists!
- demonic bondages & immoral addictions!
How do you get it right?
- ask God 4 guidance!
- after you've prayed; look into your own spirit 4 discernment!
3rd Service: USING COURTSHIP TO SET THE MARRIAGE PATTERN!
- courtship is critical to the foundation of any marriage!
- when you get it right @ the beginning, if things go wrong later, it will be easier to right them!
Lk 14:28-30
- when unforeseen circumstances stop you, it's called fate but when circumstances you can foresee stops you, it's called foolishness!
How do I use courtship to pattern my marriage?
Note 3 things to take home:
1. Whatever you negotiate is what you will navigate!
- without communication there will be no common ground!
2. Whatever you refuse to confront at the beginning, you cannot conquer as you journey!
- if you ignore NOW what you should rebuke; your LATER rebuke will be ignored!
3. Whatever you settle in foundational praying, will be settled in your family future!
Ps 127:1.... except The Lord build!
Important: Set out time to pray together!
What to do?
- pray together for clarity & direction.
- set a life pattern of discussing your life together.
4th Service: SOMETIMES YOU JUST HAVE TO WALK AWAY
- if you don't walk away from what is uncomfortable, you may not walk into your comfort!
Heb 11:24-26
In life, your values determine your decisions, and your decisions determine your destiny!
- when life victimises a man with a choice, you don't call him a victim; he is a volunteer!
Note 3 things to take home:
1. If the signs are there, use your intuition.
In Heb 5:14.... maturity is ability to discern!
What signs?
- no living relationship with Jesus Christ
- lack of trust & emotional or physical abuse
- lazy & dependent
- immoral tendencies
2. If the sins are evident, run an intervention.
- if you don't settle it, it will unsettle you!
- it's not everything you handle alone, sometimes you involve family life & pastorate!
3. If the solution is resisted, intentionally terminate it!
- it's better to be a happy single, than be singled out for an unhappy marriage!
What to do?
- prayerfully discern your relationship direction
- seek counsel when you need to make decisions
