“Soul Talk: What’s My Test Score?”
Ps. 139:23-24)
We’re all familiar with test scores. I remember the pre-computer days at college. Test scores were posted outside the professor’s office; students went to the office to look at the postings to see their score. High school students take college entrance exams, and anxiously await the test score. Your doctor runs you through several tests; at your follow-up appointment your first question is, “What are my test results?’ Checking our test scores is a common experience. In Psalm 139 David is asking to see his test score – the only difference is that he asks God. “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”
Psalm 139 is a beautiful, overwhelming Psalm. David says that God knows every action we take, every thought we think, every place we go, and every word we speak before we speak it. We can’t get away from God; there’s no hiding from Him. To top it off, God knit us together in our mother’s womb, so He knows us better than we know ourselves and has laid out a plan for our lives. Such knowledge is either unwelcome and frightening, or welcome and comforting – depending on our faith. David welcomes it with a sincere, intense prayer for self-examination. We need to learn this prayer.
David begins, “Search me, God, and know my heart…” The first petition is SEARCH ME. Having just asked God, in verses 19-22, to judge the wicked enemies of God, he turns the desire to judgment upon himself. It’s the spirit that one of our church fathers, Athanasius, stated in the 4th century: “You cannot put straight in others what is warped in yourself.” (1) David appeals to the Divine Judge to STATE THE EVIDENCE FOUND IN HIS LIFE; it’s an appeal to the supreme doctor to probe into the depths of his life to see how healthy he is.
And what a powerful request it is. Search me. Dig deep; cut away; lay bare; turn over and up; uncover; probe. Many pictures come to mind. Think of the activities involved in searching for a missing person or for a lost possession. I remember when we moved from Kalamazoo to Grand Rapids – we lost all our slides from our trip to the Holy Land. We had people search the parsonage and church in Kalamazoo and we frantically searched in and under everything in our new house, turning over and up. It’s like drilling for oil or digging for gold – going deep, cutting away, uncovering. Picture the surgeon looking for disease – laying bare, cutting away, probing. A great summary of what searching means was spoken on September 15, 2001, by President Bush: "We will find those who did it; we will smoke them out of their holes; we will get them running and we'll bring them to justice. . . . They will try to hide, they will try to avoid the United States and our allies — but we're not going to let them. They run to the hills; they find holes to get in. And we will do whatever it takes to smoke them out and get them running, and we'll get them.” (2) David was asking God to pursue him and bring him to justice.
Are you willing to pray that? Research says fewer people are willing to look at and change themselves. According to Dr. Linda Gottlieb, the practice of psychotherapy in the United States is losing its client base. In 11 years (from 1997-2008) the number of patients receiving psychological interventions plummeted by 30 percent. The reasons for this decline are complex, but Dr. Gottlieb focuses on one trend: psychotherapy involves the long, hard work of facing our own issues, but many people today would rather blame others for their problems. In other words, psychotherapists used to see patients who were unhappy and wanted to understand themselves. Now they see more patients who come in "because they wanted someone else or something else to change."(3) Are you willing to face the evidence?
God will DEAL WITH OUR HEARTS. Proverbs 21:2 says, “A person may think their own ways are right, but the Lord weighs the heart.” God searches, not so He can know – He already knows; but HE SEARCHES SO THAT WE CAN KNOW. God did the same thing in Genesis 3, when He came to Adam and Eve who were trying to hide from Him because of their sin. God asked “Where are you?” not because He didn’t know but because He wanted them to know where they were in relationship to Him. The Bible tells us that our hearts are full of evil and deceit – therefore they need work.
One preacher said, “Pestilence breathes in the unventilated, unlighted, uncleansed recesses of a neglected nature. It is only on condition of the light of God's convincing Spirit being cast into every part of our being that we shall be able to overcome and annihilate the creeping swarms of microscopic sins that are there, minute but mighty in their myriads to destroy a man's soul.” (4) To ask God to search our hearts is to ask Him to bring light into the dark places of our hearts, much like we use flashlights to help us see in the darkness. “Holy Ghost, with light divine, Shine upon this heart of mine; Chase the shades of night away, Turn my darkness into day.” (5) Dan and Chip Heath, the team of brothers who wrote the best-selling book Made to Stick, tell the following story about a doctor who was trying to get his colleagues to practice proper hand-washing techniques: Dr. Leon Bender became frustrated when he took a South Seas cruise and observed that the crew was more diligent about hand-washing than the staff at his own hospital. Frequent hand-washing by doctors and nurses is one of the best ways to prevent patient infections, and studies estimate that thousands of patients die every year from preventable bacterial infections. Numerous techniques failed to improve upon the 80% of staff who did wash hands. One day, a committee of 20 doctors and administrators were taken by surprise when, after lunch, the hospital's epidemiologist asked them to press their hands into an agar plate, a sterile Petri dish containing a growth medium. The agar plates were sent to the lab to be cultured and photographed. The photos revealed what wasn't visible to the naked eye: The doctor's hands were covered with gobs of bacteria. Imagine being one of those doctors and realizing that your own hands—the same hands that would examine a patient later in the day, not to mention the same hands that you just used to eat a turkey wrap—were harboring an army of microorganisms. It was revolting. One of the filthiest images in the portfolio was made into a screensaver for the hospital's network of computers ensuring that everyone on staff could share in the horror. Suddenly, hand-hygiene compliance rose to nearly 100 percent and stayed there. The Heath brothers conclude that we usually won't change our behavior until we see and even feel how we contribute to the problems in our world and in our relationships.(6) Are you willing to face the evidence?
Larry Schoonover wrote, “I have a very good friend who recently shared with me that on one occasion she, out of sincere concern over sin and desire to be what God wanted her to be, she prayed, "God, show me the sin in my life. Show me what I really am." She said that in a couple of weeks she began to pray, "Lord, I’ve seen enough! Please, Lord, don’t show me anymore. I can’t stand myself!"”(7) Remember that classic line from the moves, “You can’t handle the truth!” Can you handle the truth from God? Are you willing to face the evidence? “Search me, God, and know my heart…”
David’s second petition is TEST ME. “…test me and know my anxious thoughts.” David understood that it’s one thing to see our hearts as God sees them. It’s another thing entirely to work at changing. Are you willing to change? TO SUBMIT TO THE TESTING OF GOD IS TO GIVE GOD PERMISSION TO CHANGE US – to do what He wants and wills to do to bring about that change. The heart is God’s workshop and the product is our behavior and thoughts. So David asks God to test him – to put him thorough whatever is necessary to bring about change in his life. David is asking to be like metal in the fiery furnace, to have the dross melted out of his life and swept away.
Think about the significance and impact of David’s prayer. Recall some of God’s tests. Remember Abraham, who was asked to sacrifice His Son. Recall Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego who had to walk into the fiery furnace. Consider Daniel who needed to sleep in a den of lions. Reflect on Peter who went through a triple denial of knowing Jesus .It’s much easier to pray a prayer for testing than it is accept the testing. Are you willing to change?
The stark reality, the bold truth is that IT IS BETTER TO BE TESTED, CRIPPLED AND REFINED AND SAVED THAN TO BE UNTESTED, UNCHANGED, AND FILLED WITH DROSS AND LOST. Peter wrote eloquently about this (1 Pt. 1:6-9 GNT): “Be glad about this, even though it may now be necessary for you to be sad for a while because of the many kinds of trials you suffer. Their purpose is to prove that your faith is genuine. Even gold, which can be destroyed, is tested by fire; and so your faith, which is much more precious than gold, must also be tested, so that it may endure. Then you will receive praise and glory and honor on the Day when Jesus Christ is revealed. You love him, although you have not seen him, and you believe in him, although you do not now see him. So you rejoice with a great and glorious joy which words cannot express, because you are receiving the salvation of your souls, which is the purpose of your faith in him.” Are you willing to change?
One of the great scenes in Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland, has Alice standing startled before the questioning caterpillar. He asks her, “Who are you?” Puzzled by all that had recently happened to her, Alice stammers out, “I – I hardly know, Sir!” But once she collected her wits she turned the question back to the caterpillar: “Who are you?” He shrewdly sidesteps the question by changing the subject.(8) It is important to know who we are in the depths of our hearts because if there is any sinful, offensive way, we need help. So David prayed, “SEE IF THERE IS ANY OFFENSIVE WAY IN ME…” We cannot change unless we know our test score – unless we recognize the ways in us that stifle and block our relationship with God, that are an offense to God. The word ‘offensive’ can also be translated ‘wicked’, or ‘forced labor.’ It’s another great picture. Forced labor is that which is laid upon people at the command of authority; and then, because forced labor is grievous labor, it came to mean sorrow. So the 'way of wickedness', the offensive way that DAvid feels is in him is the way that leads to sorrow. So he turns to God and asks Him that He would show him what these fatal ways are. 'See if there be any way of wickedness in me; search and test me so I can change those attitudes, thoughts, and behaviors that spoil my intimacy with you.’ Are you willing to change?
David’s third petition lifts up his motive for the prayer of self-examination: LEAD ME. “…lead me in the way everlasting.” David knew that greater awareness of his sins and offensive ways would put his life on THE WAY EVERLASTING. It brings to mind what Jeremiah spoke (6:16 AMP): “Thus says the Lord: Stand by the roads and look; and ask for the eternal paths, where the good, old way is; then walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.” But God’s people did not listen (Jer. 18:15 GNT), “Yet my people have forgotten me; they burn incense to idols. They have stumbled in the way they should go; they no longer follow the old ways; they walk on unmarked paths.” David was willing to go through this self-examination from God because he wanted to walk the rest of his life on the eternal, everlasting path that would lead him into the presence of God. The big question for you this morning is, do you want to walk the rest of your life on the eternal, everlasting path that will lead you to the presence of God?
Thank God, we know something more about this way than David did. We not only know the way – we know the One who is the Way, and the Truth and the Life! He is JESUS CHRIST. HE IS THE ONLY WAY INTO THE PRESENCE OF GOD. As the Divine Judge God searches and tests us, but He balances our test score by looking at us through the sacrifice of His Son, Jesus. As the Supreme Doctor God probes the depths of our hearts to make room for healing, peace-filled presence of Jesus.
As the letter to the Hebrews so graphically portrays, JESUS IS OUR GREAT HIGH PRIEST. (Heb. 4:16 & 10:22-23): “So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most… let us go right into the presence of God with sincere hearts fully trusting him. For our guilty consciences have been sprinkled with Christ’s blood to make us clean, and our bodies have been washed with pure water. Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise.”
A businessman in a service industry grew weary of being yelled at. He tired of getting sprayed with angry spittle from dissatisfied customers who expected five-star service at Motel 6 prices. One day, he became oddly detached during yet another customer tirade; he felt as though he were watching a movie. In fact, he couldn't help but think that the angry woman's antics made her look like a monkey. That observation gave him a brilliant idea. He posted a giant mirror behind the front desk—and the customer tirades all but ceased. When people saw how rude and hateful they looked while yelling and screaming, they stopped yelling and screaming. (9) Do you want to walk the rest of your life on the eternal, everlasting path that will lead you to the presence of God? Are you willing to ask God to put a mirror in front of your life? Are you willing to face the evidence? Are you willing to change? Then come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. Come to the Table of our Lord. There we will receive His mercy, and we will find grace to help us.
(1) Athanasius, in On the Incarnation; submitted by Kevin Miller, executive vice president, Christianity Today International- from Preaching Today
(2) Provided by Doug Searle, Dallas, TX, in Preaching Magazine
(3) Matt Woodley, managing editor, PreachingToday.com; source: Lori Gottlieb, "What Brand Is Your Therapist?" The New York Times (11-23-12)- from Preaching Today
(4) Expositions of Holy Scripture - Expositions of Holy Scripture – Psalms 50-145 .
(5) Holy Ghost, with Light Divine, by Andrew Reed
(6) Dan Heath and Chip Heath, "Why Emotion, Not Knowledge, Is the Catalyst for Change" Fast Company (1-12-11); submitted by Van Morris, Mt. Washington, Kentucky-from Preaching Today
(7) Sermon Central
(8) I am grateful to James Earl Massey for this thought – from Sundays in the Tuskegee Chapel, Abingdon Press, Nashville, © 2000 by Abingdon Press, p. 20-21
(9) Gary Thomas, The Beautiful Fight, (Zondervan, 2007), p. 63- from Preaching Today
