Conquering Criticism
Nehemiah 4:3
Tonight I would like to speak a message entitled "Conquering Criticism"
In reality, you and I don't like criticism. Criticism can be crippling and the fear of being criticized can be catastrophic.
Criticism can prevent you and I from taking risks that lead to greatness - Criticism can also hinder us from reaching your full potential if we do not handle it right.
Everyone experiences criticism – and our ability to handle criticism oftentimes “makes us” or “breaks us” in life. We can either allow criticism to inspire us or immobilize us.
Everyone who decides to step out and do something for God will be criticized that's just the way it is.
Quote: If you are a Christian...
If you are a Christian, you can expect folks to criticize you, but you ought to live so nobody will believe them.
Ok lets take a look at a few things about criticism and then we will be done.
1- The cause of Criticism
What is the cause of Criticism?
We need to understand something. The cause of criticism to a person is not because the one being criticized is a bad person. The criticism Nehemiah received was not directed at him, it was directed at what he was doing.
Nehemiah just happened to be the one to step out and do something about the walls being burned down.
So it wasn't because Nehemiah was a bad person and people didn't like him, No it was because he chose to do something about the situation.
It could've have been anybody and they would have gotten criticized.
You and I must remember, that when ever we step out to do something for God, when someone comes against you, they are not coming against you because they don't like you and you are a bad person, but they are coming against you because of what you have decided to do.
Most of the time, it is not who you are that people criticize, it is what you do.
They are not coming against you as a person, but they are coming against what you represent.
They are coming against your courage, they are coming against your boldness, and they are coming against your radicalness.
Why? Well maybe because they know they should be stepping out and doing something, but somehow they have let critics steal their boldness, radicalness, or courage. So they come against the ones who have it...
Quote:
Let the man who says it cannot be done not disturb the man doing it.
Chinese proverb
See their goal is to pull you down. Because if they pull you down they don't have to deal with the conviction they get by seeing you stepping out and doing it - why, because they got you to stop.
Look at Eliab Davids brother.
He came against David not because David was a bad person, but because David made him look bad.
Eliab knew he should have been bold enough to fight the giant, but since he was scared and didn't have heart, He came against the one who did.
Why did he come against him? Well like I said earlier- if he can discourage David from stepping out, He will no longer have to deal with the conviction David brought to him by stpepping out - when he know he should have doing it.
Quote:
Fault finding is not difficult. Isaac Murray illustrates this in his story on how a dog hitched to a lawn mower stopped pulling to bark at a passerby. The boy who was guiding the mower said, "Don't mind the dog, he is just barking for an excuse to rest. It is easier to bark than to pull the mower."
Isaac Murray.
So remember one of the reasons why people criticize you, is because you are convicting them by your actions.
So rather than respond to the convictions and get on track, they try to pull you down and make you stop.
They are not made at you - they are mad at what you represent.
* Side note - have you ever been mad or hated on someone that you haven't ever talked to before?
Have you ever been mad at someone you haven't ever met, but just because of the way they walked into the room you didn't like them..., or just because the way they sang that song you didn't like them..., or just the way they dressed you didn't like them, or just because the way they testified you didn't like them....why not?
It isn't because you think they are a bad person you haven't ever met them, why because maybe they represented something you didn't have.
Such as - Boldness - Self Confidence - Self Esteem - Radicalness -
So don't take it personal if someone hates on you, its probably you represent something they don't have...
They are not mad at you - they are mad at what you represent. You are convicting them by your actions -
Quote:
To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.
Elbert Hubbard.
2 - The company of Criticism
Keep on shinning
The story is told of a judge who had been frequently ridiculed by a conceited lawyer. When asked by a friend why he didn't rebuke his assailant, he replied, "In our town lives a widow who has a dog. And whenever the moon shines, it goes outside and barks all night." Having said that, the magistrate shifted the conversation to another subject. Finally someone asked, "But Judge, what about the dog and the moon?" "Oh," he replied, "the moon went on shining--that's all."
Source Unknown.
Tell your neighbor to keep on shinning...
Here is a list of people who were criticized.
- Nehemiah - In Nehemiah 4:3 Tobiah the Ammonite, who was at his side, said, "What they are building--if even a fox climbed up on it, he would break down their wall of stones!"
He kept on shinning.
- David - I Samuel 17:28 - When Eliab, David's oldest brother, heard him speaking with the men, he burned with anger at him and asked, "Why have you come down here? And with whom did you leave those few sheep in the desert? I know how conceited you are and how wicked your heart is; you came down only to watch the battle."
David kept on shinning...
- Jesus - Jesus was criticized severely, and if our lives are Christ-like, we will be criticized as well - The crowds tried to kill Him and many members of the public were outraged by both His teachings and His behavior.
John 8:52 -Then said the Jews unto him, Now we know that thou hast a devil. Abraham is dead, and the prophets; and thou sayest, If a man keep my saying, he shall never taste of death.
Jesus kept on shinning...
- It is not what they call you, it is what you respond to...
3 - The Change of Criticism
1. Learning from criticism allows you and I to improve.
Almost every critique gives you a tool to more effectively create the tomorrow you visualize.
2. Criticism opens you and I up to new perspectives and new ideas you may not have considered. Whenever someone challenges you, they help expand your thinking.
3. Your critics give you an opportunity to practice active listening. This means you resist the urge to analyze in your head, planning your rebuttal, and simply consider what the other person is saying
Criticism can be good if we allow it to grow us and make us better.
*** Steak ***
We should treat criticism like a steak - eat the meat and throw away the bone.
Quote:
Advice from Dr. Mitchell's life: Someone in his congregation pointed out several faults in him and his preaching. Instead of retaliating, or trying to defend himself, he looked at the woman and said, "If what you say is true, would you mind praying for me?"
Adversity is what makes you and I great.
See what makes the weightlifter stronger is the resistance he faces when lifting the weight.
If you and I learn how to handle criticism it can actually make us better.
Criticism comes from the word Critique.
Criticism is not always a bad thing. There is what you call destructive criticism and then there is constructive criticism.
Everybody needs to be critigued in their life, if not then we would stay at the same level and not grow.
Its like a rugby player, a golfer, a tennis player or a businessman. They don't become great overnight.
You don't become a great athlete over night, a great singer overnight, a great preacher overnight, or a great businessman overnight. It takes someone investing in your life and critiquing you and helping you to get better.
In the same way, when you and I know how to handle criticism it can help us get to the next level.
Adversity can be good for you and I - if we allow it to make us stronger.
The psalmist said in Pslams 119:71 - It was good for me to be afflicted
so that I might learn your decrees.
*** Criticism can actually benefit us ***
Time:
If you improve how you operate after receiving criticism, this will save time and energy in the future. When you think it about from that perspective—criticism as a time saver—it’s hard not to appreciate it
The more time you and I spend dwelling about what someone said, the less time you have to do something with it.
Being Positive about criticism:
Being criticized is not a problem if you develop a positive way of dealing with it. Winston Churchill had the following words of Abe Lincoln framed on the wall of his office: "I do the very best I can, I mean to keep going. If the end brings me out all right, then what is said against me won't matter. If I'm wrong, ten angels swearing I was right won't make a difference.
When you and I learn to embrace criticism it will take us to new levels.
Criticism is always difficult to accept, but if we receive it with humility and a desire to improve our character it can be very helpful.
Several years ago someone wrote a helpful article on this subject. It stated that when we are criticized we ought to ask ourselves whether the criticism contains any truth. If it does, we should learn form it, even when it is not given with the right motivation and in the right spirit.
The article then offered these four suggestions:
(1) Commit the matter instantly to God, asking Him to remove all resentment or counter criticism on your part and teach you the needed lessons.
(2) Remember that we are all great sinners and that the one who has criticized us does not begin to know the worst about us.
(3) If you have made a mistake or committed a sin, humbly and frankly confess it to God and to anyone you may have injured.
(4) Be willing to learn afresh that you are not infallible and that you need God's grace and wisdom every moment of the day to keep on the straight path.
One thing I try to practice in my life, instead of criticizing I try to make it better.
Writing Hymns
A young boy complained to his father that most of the church hymns were boring to him--too far behind the times, tiresome tunes and meaningless words. His father put an end to his son's complaints by saying, "If you think you can write better hymns, then why don't you?" The boy went to his room and wrote his first hymn, "When I Survey the Wondrous Cross." The year was 1690, the teenager was Isaac Watts. "Joy to the World" is also among the almost 350 hymns written by him.
It is time to step out and do something for God and don't let criticism stop you -Start your own Bible Study, Write some new songs, Design your own flyer - Whatever God has placed upon your heart, go for it and don’t let criticism stop you…
