Desperate Housewives and Too Many Husbands
Matt 5:27-32
7/7/2013
Introduction
It was another interesting week in national news. The Huntingpost carried a story about a number of actresses.
* Jessica Simpson
* Scarlett Johansson
* Megan Fox
* Sarah Jessica Parker
* Cameron Diaz
* Reese Witherspoon
* Jennifer Garner
* Jessica lab
Why was newsworthy? The Huntington Post was running and article examining why these actresses among others refused to do Nude scenes. It was newsworthy that a group of successful woman had taken a moral stand that at least in some ways honor the sanctity of marriage.
P. S. Taking the Leap to something higher this summer will require embracing the hard sayings of Jesus.
This week we continue with 2 "Hard Sayings" that deal with love and marriage, lust and divorce.
Desperate Housewives and Too Many Husbands
* There are too many desperate housewives seeking fulfillment in an intimate connection outside of their marriage. There are too many husbands who have embraced lust for love and it's having an impact upon us.
The Forgiver considered these truths important enough that addressed them in early messages on the kingdom. Both of these hard sayings have to do with the significance of and sanctity of marriage, critically important.
How we honor the sanctity of marriage is supposed to set us apart from the world.
But does it?
In the USA,
Most Americans get married at some point in their life: just one out of five adults (22%) has never been married.
Marriage Is the Norm
In addition to finding that four out of every five adults (78%) have been married at least once, the Barna study revealed that an even higher proportion of born again Christians (84%) tie the knot. That eclipses the proportion among people aligned with non-Christian faiths (74%) and among atheists and agnostics (65%).
BUT, among those who have said their wedding vows, one out of three have been divorced at least once, according to a new study from The Barna Group.
Born again Christians who are not evangelical were indistinguishable from the national average on the matter of divorce: 33% have been married and divorced.
"downscale" (meaning no college and household income under $20,000), 39 percent of those who've ever married have also gotten divorced.
Among "upscale" marrieds (college graduates and household income of $75,000-plus), just 22 percent have done so.
George Barna, who directed the study, noted that Americans have grown comfortable with divorce as a natural part of life.
"There no longer seems to be much of a stigma attached to divorce; it is now seen as an unavoidable rite of passage," the researcher indicated. "Interviews with young adults suggest that they want their initial marriage to last, but are not particularly optimistic about that possibility. There is also evidence that many young people are moving toward embracing the idea of serial marriage, in which a person gets married two or three times, seeking a different partner for each phase of their adult life."
How do we strengthen our witnesses on the issue of marriage?
T.S. The Hard Sayings of Jesus give us two great starting places.
Matt 5:27-32
27 "You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully (to covet, desire, fain, fantasize about) has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.
I. Blinders and Kevlar
Matt 5:27-32
28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully (to covet, desire, fain, fantasize about) has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
ILL: Jesus locates adultery in the eye and heart before the outward act. There were two pertinent rabbinical sayings:
* "Passions lodge only in him who sees."
* "The eye and the heart are the two brokers of sin."
A. Men to guard their eyes
Matt 5:27-32
29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.
B. Women to guard their hearts
Appl: Do drastic things to avoid the trap. The proverbs about plucking out eyes and lopping off limbs stresses the seriousness of this issues in Jesus teaching. It will be better in the long run.
II. Preventative Maintenance and Roadside Assistance
31 "It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' 32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.
Judith E. Brandt, a woman in her 40s, has written a book called The 50-Mile Rule: Your Guide to Infidelity and Extramarital Etiquette. Here is an excerpt of an interview Brandt did with the Chicago Tribune:
* Q: What about the ethics and morality of extramarital affairs?
* A: There is a simple answer. Affairs are immoral and wrong. But the reality is that people are having them anyway. So you have to meet people where they are. For a lot of people, morality doesn't end up in it. So if people are doing it anyway, you have to try to mitigate the hard edges.
* Q: You say [in your book], don't feel guilty. That doesn't seem realistic.
* A: Guilt is basically something built into society to keep you in line. If you are going about your business in a discreet way and you are continuing to take care of your wife and, most importantly, your children, there is no reason to feel guilt.
"'Miss Manners' of Adultery," Chicago Tribune (5-10-02)
A. Invest in marriage to ensure the keeps running smooth
B. When in crisis reach out for help before you want to junk the ride.
What is beyond dispute is that Christ expects that the sanctity of marriage will be exemplified in the lives of his followers. If he raised the standard dare we lower it?
III. Now what?
A. Evaluate -- Have you given up ground?
We are told in Ephesians 4:27 possible to "give the enemy a foothold."
The word place refers to an area of jurisdiction. In warfare, opposing sides gain jurisdictional area whenever ground is surrendered
T.S. three ways that "ground" in the soul can be given to the devil:
1. Immorality --
Eph 4:19 Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.
2. Bitterness --
Eph 4:26 Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry (held on to anger against your spouse).
3. Unwholesome talk --
Eph 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
B. Reclaim the Ground?
1 John 1:9-10
9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
1. Repent
2. Confess
3. Claim
