God in the Ebb & Flow of Life:
Dysfunction, Division & Dreams
Scripture Text: Genesis 37.2-11
INTRODUCTION
Do you every wonder where-in-the-world God is? ~ …Events unfold and stuff happens, …and sometimes we just can’t see God in any-of-it! Have you ever wondered where God is ~ …cause you can’t feel Him, …or sense His presence, …or see His fingerprints anywhere-at-all~ …have you ever-wondered where God is?
Well, I can say with absolute-certainty that God wants to be involved in our lives. He loves His children ~ …and if you’ve received Christ-as-Savior, …then God is working in your life.
And I hope that as we take a look at Joseph’s life, …that you’ll not-only-see that God was involved in the ebb-and-flow of Joseph’s life, …but-that, He also-is-present in the ebb-and-flow of your life!
TRANSITION
Let’s start-off by reminding ourselves of who this-guy is…
His great-grand-father was Abraham ~ …the guy that left his homeland because God promised him a new-land and lots of descendants. Oh-yea… and he’s the one who became the first-time daddy at 85 years-old!
Abraham’s son, Isaac, was Joseph’s grandpa. Isaac married Rebekah and they continued to live in the land-of-Canaan ~ …the place that God had-told Abraham would-be theirs.
Isaac had a couple-of-boys: Esau and Jacob. They were a couple-of-characters ~ …but each-as-different as two-people could-be! As-a-matter-of-fact, even-though Isaac favored his-oldest-son, Esau, …Jacob pulled-a-switch-er-roo to get his father’s blessing. This made everybody in-the-house spittin’-mad ~ …so-mad, that Jacob had to get-outta-Dodge!
While Jacob was exiled from the land of Canaan, he got married. Actually, Jacob got married a couple-of-times; …and he also ended-up having a boat-load of kids!
Joseph was one of them. He was the eleventh-son born to his daddy. But, the thing-about-it-was, Joseph was the first son born to Jacob’s favorite wife! Guess what that did for Joseph!?! ~ He was special in his daddy’s-eyes. His ten-brothers born-before-him were loved by dear-ole-Dad; …But, the Bible says that Jacob loved Joseph more-than all-the-rest!
BODY
I. Dysfunction
Now… you’ll notice that the first word of the sermon-title is: “dysfunction”. I’m using that-term loosely because I’m not a licensed therapist or counselor; …and I’m not-sure of the technical definition of ‘dysfunction’ ~ …at-least, as-far-as the American Psychiatrists Association. However, I know what Webster says about it:
Abnormal or unhealthy interpersonal behavior or interaction within a group. (mirriam-webster.com)
And, I know what dictionary.com says about it:
A consequence of a social practice or behavior pattern that undermines the stability of a social system.
And-so, …according to these common-definitions, I think we’re safe to make a general-diagnosis about Joseph’s family-life: It was dysfunctional!
The ways that these brothers interacted was not healthy… They hated Joseph! And as the story unfolds ~ …even-here, in the early verses of their family-life ~ …as the story unfolds, we find that the level-of-hate keeps getting stronger and deeper! Verse 4 says: “they hated him”; …verse 5 says: “they hated him all the more”; …and verse 8 says: “they hated him all the more” (emphasis added). And-as-though we weren’t really-clueing-in-to how-bad-things were between the brothers, …the Bible tells us,
“…they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him.” (v.4)
The Hebrew phrase, there, can-mean that they wouldn’t-even greet their younger-brother! No, “Hello!”; …no, “How ya doin’?”, …or “How’s life been treatin’ ya, lil-bro?” No. They hated him. They ignored him. They shut him out and didn’t even give him the decency of a greeting! Things aren’t right, between Joseph and his brothers! ~ …And this isn’t the way a family is supposed to relate! This hate is undoing Jacob’s family…
But-wait! Joseph’s brothers aren’t the only-ones who carry the dysfunctional-blame! Joseph has his share of dysfunction, too!… Very early-on, we’re told that Joseph tattled on his older brothers! Now, when he did this, …he was 17 years-old. Seventeen… Joseph, grow-up! Your brothers are grown men, by-now. His older brothers must’ve been well into their 30’s. Joseph-himself was now-old-enough to act more-like-a-man. They’re in the family-business together ~ keeping herds and flocks. If there’s a problem, …don’t go-tattle like a 5-year-old. Go-to-your-brothers and work-it-out with them!
Ya-know, it reminds me of the wise advice that Jesus gave to His followers:
If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. Matthew 18.15
It’s good-advice for every generation; …and Joseph would’ve-done-well to resolve-the-matter with his bothers, …rather-than going-and-tattling to dear-old-Dad!
But-hold-on! Joseph-and-his-brothers aren’t the only-ones who carry the blame for all this dysfunction! Sure, all-eleven of them have a big-part-to-play in-all-this, …but, their parents also deserve some of the blame. We don’t have time to go through all the examples, …but if you go home and read the earlier chapters ~ …you’d find that the mothers treated their children like trophies-in-a-competition.
Leah and Rachel ~ especially ~ trying to out-do the other one, …in-terms-of how-many sons they bore for their-husband, Jacob! And Jacob is involved in-this-mess, too! He favored one wife over the other. And he favored Joseph above all his children. Maybe it was because Joseph was the first son born to his favorite wife. Maybe it was because Joseph was the baby of the family. Maybe it was because Joseph was born to him later-in-life… But-whatever the reason, …Jacob loved Rachel and Joseph more than the rest of the household. And that favoritism was a recipe for messed-up-relationships within the family.
Granted, …they didn’t have the big-fancy-word, ‘dysfunction’, like we have, now. But, we know-it when we see-it, don’t we!?!
You-betcha! Because Jacob loved Joseph more than the rest of the boys, …this was a recipe for rivalry and competition and resentment. And I-think-you-can-see that the stage is being set ~ …there’s gonna-be-problems in Jacob’s house!
II. Division
I think it’s important for us to step-back at-this-point, and ask a couple of questions: Is it possible to love all your children equally? Well… if-that-means that each one is treated exactly-the-same as the others ~ …then the answer is: No! Each child is unique in it’s personality and needs. I cannot treat my sons in exactly the same way. They are two-different people. They have two very-different personalities. And because they have different personalities and different life-experiences, …they need different expressions of love. Our children are different ~ …and because of those differences, …love is expressed with different nuances.
So, …just-because love takes different-shapes for the children, …that, …in-and-of-itself, …doesn’t-mean that one child is loved more-than the others. Is it possible to love all your children equally? Not-if that means that parental-love is expressed exactly the same!
But, it is possible to love them equally if-that-means that we love them with the same depth of loving-concern for their well-being. How it gets expressed may be different; …but the goal-and-desire is the same: …that they be safe and healthy; …that their needs are met; …that they grow up to be responsible-citizens; …that they learn-early-in-life to honor-and-love the Lord ~ …These are the goals that Christian parents have for their children ~ So, it’s o.k. if the relationship that a parent has with one-child is different-from the relationship he has with another-child. The problem-comes when favoritism enters-the-picture. Favoritism is the attitude that says, one is more-important, …more-special, …one is better than the rest. And that’s just-what-Jacob did for Joseph. Jacob showed favoritism toward his youngest-son. How did he do this?... He gave him a gift… a coat. Sounds innocent-enough… but-wait… In the NIV, this coat is described as a “richly ornamented robe”. The Message says it was “an elaborately embroidered coat”. The King James says Jacob’s gift to Joseph was “a tunic of many colors”. And the Amplified Bible describes the gift as, “a distinctive, long tunic with sleeves”.
I-think-you-can-see that there’s wide-variety in these translations… Why? Why such-big-differences in the way this phrase is translated? Well… to-put-it-plainly: the Hebrew words that are used here are very rare and scholars are uncertain about what they mean, precisely. It’s-as-though his kind of garment was an absolutely-extraordinary gift. It’s a one-of-a-kind; …and the ornamentation-on-it, …or the elaborate-embroidery-work ~ …in all the Bible, there’s no other example of something like this. And-so, we could get-distracted by all-kinds-of-questions: …did Joseph’s robe have pretty-needle-work around the sleeves and collar?; …was it made of some rare-and-expensive material, like-silk?; …or, was it as-colorful-as a rainbow!?! ~
We could get-lost in these-kinds-of-questions, …but the reality is: we don’t need to know the particulars. What matters is this: Whatever-the-shape or color of Joseph’s robe (or coat or tunic) ~ …everybody-knew that it was a very-special-garment. It was not a garment that you’d wear out in the fields, while watching sheep for weeks-on-end. It was not a garment that you’d wear while sheering-the-sheep, …or herding other animals. This was the kind-of-thing that you’d wear on special-occasions, …in the company of special-guests, …while you lounged around the house eating grapes and bon-bons!
One Bible commentator says that the problem is not that a father gave his son a gift; …and it’s not that it’s a nice-gift; …but the problem was:
…that Jacob was doing more than simply giving Joseph a nice gift; he was raising the boy to a level above that of his brothers. (Claus Westermann)
Maybe there is a warning to all-parents in this story: …as we watch Jacob’s fatherly-love move from: …love for his son; …to favoritism for one-son; …to preference-for-that-son, over all-the-others; …to partiality-of-that-son, in exclusion of-the-others. And it was the robe that triggered the deepest feelings of hated, because
“The gift of the robe was an event for witnesses to see, and having seen it, the brothers finally knew where they stood.” (Westermann)
This family is deeply divided. Family members are choosing up sides ~ Dad, Rachel, and Joseph, are on one side; …the ten-other-brothers on the other. It’s an ugly picture ~ …and frankly, …I’m not sure that Jacob even saw it! He really does appear to be clueless in this-whole-thing. And you’d think that he’d have learned from his own family-life! His father felt a special-connection with his brother, Esau. And-so, …you’d kinda-expect that Jacob would’ve known-from-personal-experience how it felt to be the odd-son-out! Or, …maybe he entered into his parenting-years with the same kinda-baggage that we all carry: …the blessings and the mistakes that our parents bestowed on us!
But, as desperate-and-divided as things seem-to-be in this family ~ …a dream is given, …a seed is planted, …a hope is sparked that will eventually change the face of the world ~ …and it’s given to Joseph.
III. Dreams
This may be the first-time that you’ve really-imagined how messed-up the relationships were within Jacob’s family. And when you see the dysfunction and the hatred and the contempt that brews-between these-brothers ~ …you might feel like despairing over whether anything good could-have-come from this crazy-collection of family-members. But, if our attention becomes fixated on the problems that they have, …and how wrong things-are-between the family-members, …we would miss the point. And it’s an important-point. Without this point, we’re wastin’ our time looking at Jacob’s family and Joseph’s life. What’s the point?... It’s simple: God doesn’t wait for us to get our act together; …God doesn’t wait for us to get our relationships straightened-out before He begins working in-and-through us! And the evidence of this is that God gives Joseph a dream. It’s a big-dream. It’s a dream-that-carries a big-punch. And in the weeks-to-come, we’ll see that this dream is a game-changer for this nomadic-band of sheep-herders. To a family that is filled with hatred, …and division, …and dysfunction ~ …to this family God speaks.
The dream is given specifically to Joseph. It’s not hard to get the point of the dream. It has to do with his brothers bowing and submitting to him. Frankly, …it doesn’t-surprise-me one-bit, …the way that his older brothers responded to his dream! They were astonished. They were indignant. They were flabbergasted that their younger-brother would presume to suggest that one-day he’d be the top-dog.
But ya-know-what?... Ultimately, this is not about Joseph. And-so, the question is not whether Joseph handled things-correctly… And the question is not whether Joseph could’ve been more tactful. The question is: What is God up to!?! How is God gonna unfold and accomplish His plans in-and-through this immature teen-ager, …and this messed-up family!?!
And God decided that one dream wasn’t-enough! He gave Joseph a second-dream ~ …but, it essentially made-the-same point as the first dream. And his brothers despised him for telling them the dream. And his father rebuked him for the dream.
Did Jacob detect arrogance in Joseph?, …did he pick-up-on an attitude of superiority?; …was Jacob afraid that Joseph had let the special-treatment go-to-his-head!?!
We’re not-really-sure what Jacob thought of Joseph’s dream ~ …other than, he rebuked him; …and… the Bible tells us that Jacob “kept the matter in mind”. Kinda-sounds-like-when Mary treasured things in her-heart about Jesus. But, Jacob kept the matter in mind ~ …Maybe he heard echoes of God’s promise to his grand-father Abraham ~ …that God would make his descendants a great-nation. Maybe he heard echoes of God’s own-promises to him, next to the river, many-years-before. Who knows!?! ~ but I suspect that Jacob had some-kind-of-inkling that God works in surprising, and often-unexpected ways. And if God is behind these dreams of Joseph’s, …what-kinds-of-surprising things are in-store for him and his family!?!
CONCLUSION
In his second letter to the Corinthian church, Paul talks about the call-of-God ~ that God chooses to use and to work through broken, fragile, very-human beings. He says it this way:
We have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.
(2 Cor 4.7)
Ya-know... Paul might have been talking-about the call-of-ministry and proclaiming the gospel-of-Christ, …but, this same-principle is true for every aspect of God’s work in-and-through human-beings. Joseph was very-much a jar-of-clay. Joseph’s family ~ with all their problems and issues and unhealthy-relationships ~ …Joseph’s family was a whole-collection of clay-pots. God’s work stands on shaky-ground because He chooses to do much-of-His-work through fragile-pottery! Cracked pots, …chipped-jars, …leaky-faucets ~ And-you-understand that we’re not-just-talkin’-about Jacob and Joseph and the rest-of-their-family ~ Right? We’re talkin’ about people who bear-names like Connie, and Milt, and Amy, …and Brian, …and Tom, …and Jeremy, …and Heather, …and Josh.
It would be great if God chose to work through people who were perfect and had-it-all-together! It would be wonderful if God only picked folks who never make mistakes. But He doesn’t! He chooses to work with people who are broken, …confused, …mixed-up. I love to hear stories from missionaries about transformed lives. These who used to be drug-addicts and alcoholics ~ …people whose lives are a wreck, …the bottom-of-the-barrel, as-far-as society is-concerned ~ …these people are being reclaimed by the kingdom-of-God; …and God ~ in His providence and grace ~ …God is calling these broken-people into His-ministry! And He’s been doing this almost-since the beginning of time ~ …choosing unlikely-characters, …surprising-personalities, …people who wouldn’t make the “A-list” by a human-resource-manager.
Folks… t here are so-many-points of application that emerge from this introduction-to-Joseph’s-story! There’s a lesson for every-parent ~ we must love our children; …but don’t show favoritism or partiality toward one, over the others! There’s a lesson for every-sibling ~ love your brothers-and-sisters; …and when there’s difficulties, …don’t let hatred get a foothold in your heart! There’s a lesson for every church; …and we should ask ourselves whether we have relationships in our church-family that are as messed-up as the relationships in Joseph’s family!
God doesn’t wait for us to get our act together before He gets involved in our lives.
Every-single-one-of-us is a cracked-pot, …a clay-jar, …a broken-vessel. But, God is redeeming us, God is transforming us, God is healing our hearts and He wants to heal relationships so that His love takes-hold in our family.
I wish that there were never mis-understandings between church-members. I wish that we all got-along-swimmingly and ne’er a harsh word was spoken. I wish that we would never make a mistake and hurt someone’s feelings. But ya know what?... We’re all a work-in-progress. God chooses us and God calls us and God places us in positions of ministry to accomplish His goals ~ …even though we are unpolished, imperfect, broken! Our focus must be on the One who calls, rather than the ones that are called. People make all-kinds-of-messes. …’cause the moment we get our eyes on people, we’ll get disillusioned and disgruntled and side-tracked.
God gave Joseph a dream. Did Joseph handle it correctly?... Was he bragging, when he told his brothers the dream? Yea… He could have done a better-job in how he handled the whole-deal. But, that doesn’t take-away from-the-fact that God was at work; …God chose to work through him in a special way; …and, whether the other-brothers realized it-or-not, …the way that God was going to work through Joseph would be their salvation!
We sell God short when we get focused on one-another’s faults; …and we do terrible-damage, when we hold onto hatred or resentment or jealousy.
God’s family is to be characterized by love. How many times did Jesus say, “Love one another”? “As I have loved you, so you are to love one another”. “By your love for one another, the world will know that you are my disciples”. Love is at the heart of relationships between God’s children.
Sadly, …in Jacob’s family the only time ‘love’ is mentioned is-when we’re told that Jacob loved one-of-his-sons more than the others. It’s messed-up. It’s not a healthy-kind-of-love. It’s a warped kind of love that’s called favoritism. There’s no-love mentioned between the brothers… Just hatred, and more-hatred, …and deeper-hatred, …and jealousy.
May God help us not to let hatred or jealousy take-hold in our hearts! May God forgive us when our attitudes toward one another are shaped by ungodly-attitudes, …rather than by love. May God give us patience with one another ~ …understanding that each of us is a work-in-progress; …and-that we’re jars-of-clay and cracked-pots and broken vessels that are being restored, healed and transformed by His grace! But-more-than-anything-else, let’s look to see God at work in the ebb and flow our lives… God doesn’t wait for us to get our act together before He starts working! We’re all a bunch of cracked-pots ~ but filled with treasure!... For God is working in us and among us!
