Introduction:
A. A man was sitting in the living room and wondered what time it was, so he called to his young son in the kitchen and asked, “Bobby, what is the little hand on?”
1. After a short pause, little Bobby replied, “A chocolate chip cookie.”
2. Little Bobby got caught with his hand in the cookie jar, and he was feeling guilty, and so he confessed.
3. That’s actually a pretty good model for all of us.
B. If we could somehow step on a guilt scale – one that measured the weight of the guilt we are carrying – I’m guessing that it would show that some of us are carrying a heavy weight of guilt.
1. We are in a series called “Extreme Makeover – God Edition” and we are addressing some of the things in life that cause us the most difficulty.
2. Last week we talked about lust, and in previous weeks we have talked about worry, anger, bitterness and substance abuse.
3. The interesting thing about today’s issue is that it can be the result of any of the other things we have been addressing.
4. The guilt that we might be carrying may be in association with our struggle with anxiety, anger, bitterness, alcohol abuse or pornography use.
C. Just what is guilt?
1. Guilt is a feeling that everyone is familiar with. It can be described as a “bothered conscience” or a “feeling of culpability for offenses.”
2. This is what we might call “true guilt.” True guilt or genuine guilt comes as a result of violating one’s moral beliefs.
3. The opposite is what we might call false guilt. It is derived from misconceptions or feelings gone astray. In the case of false guilt, the individual feels guilty without having committed any violation.
4. Dr. Paul Tournier, a noted Christian physician, wrote, “false guilt is that which comes as a result of judgments and suggestions of men. True guilt is that which results from divine judgment.”
5. God uses genuine guilt to stir our conscience when we act irresponsibly and sinfully. Genuine guilt is meant to be a positive motivator that brings us to our knees before God’s throne of grace and mercy.
6. False guilt, on the other hand, can be deadly to our lives.
D. Many people feel a sense of guilt and they cannot define the reason for their guilt.
1. Sadly, many people who are the innocent victims of another person’s immoral actions often feel guilty for that which is not their fault.
2. People who have been physically, mentally, emotionally and sexually abused are prime candidates for false guilt.
3. They often carry huge burdens of guilt that they should not have to bear because their abusers told them repeatedly that it was all their fault.
4. False guilt is not from God. It is Satan’s way of keeping us from becoming all that God desires
5. False guilt can take many forms – there can be guilt over not meeting parent’s expectations, or assuming responsibility for your parent’s divorce, or not meeting other’s standards.
6. Some people feel guilty if their house is untidy or the lawn isn’t mowed, and Satan takes delight in imprisoning us in guilt over trivial things.
7. People who suffer from false guilt face a never-ending barrage of messages that shout, “you’re a failure”; “you are bad”; “you’ve disappointed everyone around you.”
E. How do we try to deal with guilt?
1. Some people try to deny it or rationalize it – they say, “Well it wasn’t really wrong, and lots of other people do the same kinds of things. So, I’m not really guilty.”
2. Some people try to ignore it – they stop listening to their conscience. This, of course, is a very dangerous thing to do.
3. Some people try to deaden it – they try to sooth their conscience by eating, drinking, inhaling or injecting something to make their pain go away.
4. Some people try to blame others for it – saying, “It’s not my fault. They are the guilty party.” Sometimes that’s true, but other times it is not.
5. One other way that people try to deal with guilt is to try to compensate for it – They try to do something good to make up for the bad thing they have done. They try to be overly nice or unreasonably self-sacrificing.
6. As you can plainly see, none of these approaches to dealing with guilt are good, healthy, or spiritual ways to handle the problem.
F. The Bible has many stories about guilt, regret and forgiveness. Perhaps the best known is the story of David.
1. What makes David’s story so helpful is that it is not only the most famous sin in the whole Bible, it is also a great example of the wrong way, initially, to deal with our sin and guilt – that is cover it up.
2. Another thing that makes the story so helpful for us, is that after David dealt appropriately with the situation, he wrote in the Psalms about the feelings he had at different points in the situation
G. This part of King David’s story is found in 2 Samuel 11 and it’s a sad story of lust, adultery, deception, murder and cover-up. Most of you know David’s story pretty well.
1. In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, when David should have been out with his armies, who were at the time fighting against the Ammonites, David was at home with time on his hands.
2. So, one night when David could not sleep, he got up from his bed and took a walk on the roof of the palace.
3. He happened to witness a woman named Bathsheba taking a bath. Lust took hold of him and he inquired about her.
4. He discovered that she was married to Uriah the Hittite, one of his faithful fighting men.
5. But that did not deter him. He called for her to come to him, and he, as king, had to be obeyed.
6. As the result of their affair, Bathsheba became pregnant, and this is where David began to try to cover-up his guilt.
7. He brought Uriah home from war and tried several times to get him to spend the night with Bathsheba, his wife, but Uriah would not since all of his buddies at war were living in hardship and danger. How could he sleep in comfort and pleasure with his wife.
8. Since this didn’t work, David moved to stage two of the great cover-up – he devised a plan for Uriah to die in battle.
9. The plan worked perfectly, and David immediately married the widowed Bathsheba.
10. It looks like the cover-up worked. He’s home free. No one will ever know about the adultery and murder. Eight months later the child is born and everyone’s happy.
11. End of story, right? Wrong!
12. 2 Samuel 11:27 says, “But the thing that David had done displeased the Lord.”
H. Do you think that David had a guilty conscience during this time?
1. Do you wonder what was going on in David’s head? Had he really forgotten about his sins? Did he actually think that God had not seen it all?
2. No. I believe David knew that God knew.
3. But remember the ways that people try to deal with guilt that we just talked about?
4. David was trying to ignore it. He was trying not to think about it at all.
5. But God would not let him alone. God’s hand was heavy on David the entire time. And finally God sent the prophet Nathan to confront him.
I. Once David was confronted with his sin, he said six crucial words that changed everything.
1. 2 Sam. 12:13, Then David said, “I have sinned against the Lord.”
2. In the end, David did the only thing that can make a difference with guilt – he took it to God.
3. Our Scripture reading for today tells us to do that, “Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near. Let the wicked forsake his way and the evil man his thoughts. Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him, and to our God, for he will freely pardon.” (Isaiah 55:6-7)
4. When we are guilty before the Lord, we must do three things: (1) repent (forsake his way), (2) confess (admit our guilt), and (3) request God’s mercy.
J. Turn to Psalm 32 and let’s notice how David describes his experience with guilt and forgiveness.
1. “Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the LORD does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit. When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the LORD ‘—and you forgave the guilt of my sin.”
2. Notice how David describes the pain of guilt and how it weighed him down, until he finally turned to the Lord and acknowledged his sin.
3. But after he did so, he experienced forgiveness and he said that forgiveness is blessed.
K. Now let’s look at Psalm 51 and notice that this Psalm was written specifically in reference to David’s sin with Bathsheba. It’s like we get to peek into David’s personal journal as he spills his guts to God.
1. Notice the heading: “For the director of music. A psalm of David. When the prophet Nathan came to him after David had committed adultery with Bathsheba.”
2. David wrote: “Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions. Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight, so that you are proved right when you speak and justified when you judge. Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. Surely you desire truth in the inner parts ; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place. Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice. Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity. Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will turn back to you. Save me from bloodguilt, O God, the God who saves me, and my tongue will sing of your righteousness. O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.”
3. There are three Hebrew words for sin and David used them all to describe his situation.
4. The one translated “transgressions” convey the meaning of rebellion against God.
5. The second word translated “iniquity” has to do with perversity or sexual sin.
6. The third word is translated “sin” and has to do with any sin that required a sacrifice.
7. David wanted to cover all the bases and be sure to confess all his sin before the Lord and the result was the gift of God’s mercy.
L. We tend to use the words “mercy” and “grace” interchangeably, and even though they are similar in meaning, there is a difference.
1. In reference to God, mercy has to do with withholding the punishment we deserve.
2. And in reference to God, grace has to do with receiving a blessing that we do not deserve.
3. So, mercy is withholding the negative punishment, and grace is giving the positive reward.
4. We do not deserve either, but because of God’s love and justice shown in the sacrifice of Christ, then they are both offered to us.
M. One of the most encouraging passages about sin, guilt and forgiveness is 1 Corinthians 6:9-11.
1. “Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.”
2. One of the most beautiful things about the gospel is that it shows that a person’s present and future does not have to be based on their past.
3. A person can be changed and the past can be forgiven and forgotten.
4. Psalm 103:11-12 says, “For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.”
5. Hebrews 8:12 contains this quote from Jeremiah 31, “For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more." [ Jer. 31:34]
N. So, what do we need to do to deal with our guilt?
1. First we need to turn to God and receive the cleansing that makes us his children.
a. Listen to Titus 3:3-7, “At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.”
2. Second, if we are already a Christian but have guilt because we have sinned as a Christian, then we simply need to confess our sin.
a. 1 John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”
3. If we have done these things, then we are no longer guilty before God and at that point we need to stop beating up on ourselves.
a. Someone has said that “guilt is the gift that keeps on giving.”
b. If God has forgiven us then we need to forgive ourselves.
O. I like the story told of the boy who while visiting his grandparents was given his first slingshot.
1. He practiced in the woods, but he could not hit his target.
2. As he came back to Grandma’s backyard, he spied her pet duck.
3. On impulse, he took aim and let fly. The stone hit the duck and it fell over dead.
4. The boy panicked. Desperately, he hid the dead duck in the woodpile, only to look up and see his sister, Sally, watching. Sally had seen it all, but she said nothing to anyone about it.
5. After lunch that day, Grandma said, “Sally, let’s wash the dishes.” But Sally said, “Johnny told me that he wanted to help in the kitchen today. Didn’t you, Johnny?” She whispered to him, “Remember the duck!” So Johnny, did the dishes.
6. Later, Grandpa asked if the children wanted to go fishing. Grandma said, “Sorry, I need Sally to help me with supper.”
7. Sally smiled and said, “That’s all taken care of. Johnny wants to do it.” Again she whispered, “Remember the duck.” Johnny stayed and helped while Sally went fishing.
8. After several days of doing both his chores and Sally’s, Johnny couldn’t stand it any longer. He went to his grandmother and confessed to killing her duck.
9. His grandmother replied while giving him a hug, “I know, Johnny. I saw the whole thing from the kitchen window. I was angry, but because I love you, I forgave you. I was just wondering how long you would let Sally use guilt to make a slave of you.”
10. God is wondering the same about us. How long will we allow ourselves to be slaves of our guilt. He is willing to forgive us, and in many cases already has, but we won’t forgive ourselves and we allow Satan to lock us up on a prison of guilt.
11. Some of us have been allowing guilt to enslave us unnecessarily for a long time.
P. I want to offer one more word of advice – we need to stop resisting God’s love for us.
1. Guilt only serves one good purpose, and that is to drive us to repentance.
2. After that, nothing else good can come from it.
3. We must not allow guilt to drive us away from God in embarrassment and shame.
4. John 3:16 and 17 says, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.”
5. See, it’s not about what we’ve done; It’s about what God’s done.
6. God knows us and he still loves us! We must stop resisting his love for us.
7. He is like the Father in the story of the Prodigal Son who came running when his disobedient son came home in humility and repentance.
Q. There’s an old story told of a preacher who was riding the train and noticed a young man sitting alone.
1. The boy was obviously nervous and distressed, so the preacher introduced himself and asked if he could help.
2. At first the young man refused to say what was wrong, but then the story came tumbling out.
3. He had quarreled with his father and had run away from home.
4. Homesickness and remorse had overtaken him and now he was returning.
5. He had written to his mother saying, “If it is all right for me to come home, tie a white rag on the limb of the tree in the front yard. I’ll see it as the train goes by. If it’s there, I’ll get off at the next station. If it isn’t there, I’ll keep going to I don’t know where.” The boy said he was afraid to look.
6. The preacher told him to lean back and close his eyes. “I’ll look for you,” he promised. Minutes later they came upon the house and the preacher said, “Open your eyes and look, there is a white rag on every limb of that tree.”
7. The white rags hanging in the tree testified to the love and forgiveness of that boy’s family.
8. When our heavenly Father wanted us to know that He loves us and wants us to come home, He didn’t hang rags in a tree, rather He allowed His Son to hang on a cross for our salvation.
9. The cross of Christ testifies to the love and forgiveness of our Heavenly Father.
R. Why not get off the guilt train and come home to the heavenly Father who loves you unconditionally?
1. If you haven’t yet become a Christian, repent and be baptized.
2. If you are a Christian, repent and confess you sin today and leave here a new person.
3. In Christ a person’s sins are forgiven and forgotten – this gives us the guilt makeover we need.
Resources:
Based on a sermon series by Rick Atchley.
