Last Sunday I told you about a seminar for children entitled: A Volcano In My Tummy. The program description reads in part: “This course will teach children…how to handle their anger using the anger rules; anger can then become a motivating force that will help them build healthy relationships and lead successful, happy lives.” We asked the question whether anger can be managed, even harnessed to build healthy relationships and happy lives, as stated in the course aim. That led us to ponder this sermon theme: Anger Management or Anger Banishment? What does Jesus say? Today is part 2 of that sermon since Jesus had a lot to say about anger, more than I could fit in last week’s sermon. Give me your full attention now because to ignore what Jesus has to say about anger is way more dangerous than ignoring the stop signs on your way home from church this morning. You might, by God’s grace, make it home safely should you blow through all the stop signs, but if you despise God’s grace and ignore what Jesus says about anger, you will not make it to your heavenly home.
Last week we heard Jesus tell us that the sin of anger is just as dangerous as the sin of murder (Matthew 5:21, 22). Therefore Jesus urges us to banish sinful anger from our hearts as quickly as a parent would remove a rattlesnake from a baby’s crib. Jesus then went on to say: “…if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift” (Matthew 5:23, 24).
What strikes you as odd about that statement? How would you have worded it differently if you had spoken those words? I would have said: “If you are angry with another, do something about it before worshipping your Lord.” Instead Jesus said that if someone else has righteous anger in their heart against you, be reconciled to that individual first before you worship the Lord. Wow. Jesus doesn’t just want me to banish anger from my heart; he also wants me to work at banishing anger from the hearts of others!
How does that compare with the world’s way of thinking? How often haven’t we heard this kind of “apology”? “If anyone was offended by what I said or did, I’m sorry.” I can’t of course look into the hearts of those who speak words like these, but it always strikes me that the message being relayed is really: “I don’t know why you have such a problem with what I said or did, but sorry…I guess.”
Compare that attitude with a close look at what Jesus said. “…if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you…” (Matthew 5:23). The word translated as “something” could just as well have been translated as “anything.” In other words, if there is anything your brother is angry with you about, no matter how small, then go and be reconciled. Do we do that? Or do we instead say things like, “I was just joking. I don’t know why he’s so upset. He’s just got to get a thicker skin.” No, says Jesus. It’s not your brother who has the problem, the problem is yours. You have said or done something to upset and hurt another. Out of love for that individual you need to go and set it straight. Offer a heartfelt apology without making any excuses.
Dads, I wonder if we don’t especially need to work at this. In the guise of equipping our kids to face a cruel world we’ll often criticize their efforts and make light of their shortcomings. We don’t mean to hurt but we often do. The thing is we are to be a safe haven. We are to be the one adult male that our children are not afraid to make a mistake around. That doesn’t mean we won’t offer constructive criticism, but we don’t need to do it by belittling or being sarcastic. Banish such attitudes so that there is no question in the minds of our children that we love and support them.
But does this mean that we should never say anything to hurt the feelings of another? No. The Apostle Paul was very clear when he urged the younger Timothy, “Preach the Word…correct, rebuke…” (2 Timothy 4:2a). When we are warning another away from sin we will have to rebuke and say things that may hurt that person’s feelings. But just as a parent is not afraid to annoy a child by warning him away from playing on a busy street, so we cannot be afraid to rebuke sin. But we need to be careful the way we do it. That truth comes out in the rest of the passage where Paul said, “Preach the Word…correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction” (2 Timothy 4:2). “Encourage with great patience.” These are words that are good for me to hear often because when I see sin or false teaching that needs rebuking, it’s easy for me to get annoyed because this is more “work” for me, the pastor. You can pray that the Lord would banish that kind of sinful anger from my heart.
But let’s go back to our text from Matthew 5. Why do you think Jesus urged reconciliation with a fellow sinner even before approaching God in worship? What do your brother’s attitudes and feelings towards you have to do with your relationship with God? Everything! If matters are not right between you and me, they cannot be right with God either. Bringing God a gift and spending time singing his praises doesn’t give you the right to treat others any way you want. Think of what Jesus said were the two greatest commandments: love God with all our heart soul, and mind, and love our neighbor as we love ourselves (Luke 10:27). These commands are like two wings on an airplane. Chop one off and you will crash and burn.
David understood well this truth. Do you remember how he demonstrated it in our Old Testament lesson this morning? Although he had done nothing to hurt King Saul, Saul was eager to capture and put David to death. Why? Because he was jealous of David. The people loved David more than they loved Saul. God had also made it clear that he was going to take the crown from Saul and give it to David. You would think that David would start to hate Saul for constantly hounding him. And yet when David had the chance to kill Saul, he didn’t. Instead he took the opportunity to assure Saul that he was still very much his loyal subject. David did his best to be reconciled with Saul even though he wasn’t guilty of anything that Saul should have been angry with him about.
Is that how we live? Do we go out of our way to be reconciled with others? That takes work. It’s usually just easier to shrug our shoulders and say, “I don’t know what her problem is, but I can’t waste my time or energy worrying about it.” It’s true, David never managed to fully convince Saul that he wasn’t a threat, but at least he made a genuine effort at reconciliation. That’s what Jesus is telling us to do this morning too and look at how urgent the message is. Jesus said, “Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still with him on the way, or he may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. 26 I tell you the truth, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny” (Matthew 5:25, 26).
The time for reconciliation must always be right now, not later when it is more convenient or easy. Now is the time to settle matters, even before you worship. Why is Jesus so adamant about this? Because tomorrow may be too late! Judgment Day could come or the person you have hurt may be called to glory.
The most obvious application of Jesus’ words for us is to Holy Communion. When we come forward to receive his body and blood with the bread and wine, we’re expressing our sorrow over sin and need for the forgiveness that is offered in the sacrament. We’re also stating our unity with one another. But how can we express that unity if we’re at odds with one another? How can we come to Communion when we have hurt our brother and sister and think, “They had it coming,” or “They started it”? That should not be! In this regard Jesus calls for anger banishment – not just in your heart but in the heart of your brother or sister.
So does that mean you shouldn’t come to Communion next Sunday if you know that someone has righteous anger in their heart towards you? Not necessarily. Come if you’re attitude is this: “Lord, I know I’ve hurt this person. I’m sorry that I’ve done that but I don’t have the words to say or the courage to go and speak to this person. I need your help. I need your power.” You will receive that courage and power through the blessing of Holy Communion. Come and get fueled up to set things right, then go and be reconciled.
We don’t want to put off reconciliation with one another because we are all on our way to see the judge. Every second of our life that ticks away takes us one step closer to the judgment throne. Isn’t that a scary thought? It is considering we don’t pursue reconciliation as thoroughly as God demands. What excuse will we offer for this failure? None. Instead we will offer what God first offered us: the perfect life and death of Jesus. It’s only this sacrifice that makes us confident of forgiveness.
Because God has reconciled himself to you through Jesus, go now and set matters right with any person you may have hurt. Banish all anger, not just from your heart, but to the best of your ability, from the heart of your brother and sister. God will give you the strength to do this. Amen.
SERMON NOTES
How do we know from our sermon text that Jesus wants us to banish anger not only from our own hearts, but also from the hearts of others?
“I was just kidding!” That’s often what we say to someone who was hurt by our comments. How does our sermon text show that such an attitude is not acceptable?
Jesus teaches us that we should be reconciled with one another before we approach God in worship. Why?
Agree or disagree? (Explain your answer.) We should not go to Holy Communion if someone is angry with us.
