A Father’s Blessing
Intro: There is a crisis in our world today. Way too many Dads are MIA. Whatever the cause (and sometimes the cause is noble), the problem is what happens to the kids who miss out on what only a Dad can offer. When Fathers are involved in their kids’ lives in a loving healthy way, those kids are blessed indeed! But even among those who have a Dad in their lives, sometimes they are still missing something they need very much from him – His blessing.
-Now a blessing from a Dad could come in many forms (other than the car keys):
Words (Affection, Direction, Encouragement/Hope, Wisdom. Don’t undo the power of good words by harsh criticism, name calling, or neg. imprinting. Don’t ridicule to motivate. One Dad shared the 4 most powerful words you can say to your kid: I believe in you!)
Approval (Comes thru words, facial expressions, body language, responses. It is possible to approve of a person while not nec. approving of certain actions). Living without a sense of approval from one’s father leaves them searching for the approval elsewhere.
Touch (Physical touch is vital! The lack of it can send daughters seeking it elsewhere)
Time (presence, proximity- there is no substitute for being there!)
Life Example (Your kids will be more impacted by who you are and how you live consistently than by occasional words or actions. Start where you are, but allow God to transform you from the inside out by calling on Him and trusting in Him. That will produce the greatest diff. in your life and in your family!)
-I’d like to focus on a father and son in the Bible, and take a look at the blessing the dad passed on to the son.
Genesis 27:25-34
-Our story comes from Genesis 27. Isaac & Rebecca had twin sons, Esau & Jacob, who were not anything alike. Esau was an outdoorsman with hairy arms & hands & he loved hunting & fishing. Jacob was more of a homebody, & spent a lot of time with his mother.
In the 27th chapter of Genesis, their father, Isaac, has grown old & blind, & he decides it is time to pass on the blessing to his oldest son.
-Now a Jewish father’s blessing was a formal delegation of the father’s leadership & authority to his oldest son. And since the oldest son was assuming the leadership responsibilities of the family, he also received a double share of his father’s possessions. So the bestowing of the blessing was a very important event indeed.
In vs’s 2 4 Isaac tells Esau, "I am now an old man & don’t know the day of my death. Now then, get your weapons your quiver & bow & go out to the open country to hunt some wild game for me. Prepare me the kind of tasty food I like & bring it to me to eat, so that I may give you my blessing before I die."
-So Esau leaves, & while he is gone, Rebecca, his mother, seizes the opportunity to secure the blessing for Jacob, who was her favorite. She quickly prepares some tasty food & tells Jacob to put on Esau’s best clothes. To help fool blind old Isaac, she puts goatskins on Jacob’s hands & arms to make them feel hairy. Then she sends him in with the food to ask for the blessing.
-Listen to vs’s 19-20, "Jacob said to his father, ‘I am Esau, your firstborn. I have done as you told me. Please sit up & eat some of my game so that you may give me your blessing.’"
-Now Isaac was suspicious because Jacob’s voice didn’t sound like Esau’s. So he asked, "How did you find it so quickly, my son?" Jacob replies, "The Lord your God gave me success."
-Then vs’s 21-23, "Isaac said to Jacob, ‘Come near so I can touch you, my son, to know whether you really are my son Esau or not.’ Jacob went close to his father Isaac, who touched him & said, ‘The voice is the voice of Jacob, but the hands are the hands of Esau.’
-“He did not recognize him, for his hands were hairy like those of his brother Esau; so he blessed him."
-The blessing that was given is found in vs’s 27-29. "So he went to him & kissed him. When Isaac caught the smell of his clothes, he blessed him & said, ‘Ah, the smell of my son is like the smell of a field that the Lord has blessed.
‘May God give you of heaven’s dew & of earth’s richness an abundance of grain & new wine. May nations serve you & peoples bow down to you. Be lord over your brothers, & may the sons of your mother bow down to you. May those who curse you be cursed & those who bless you be blessed."
After he received the blessing from his father, Jacob left. Shortly after, Esau came in with the game that he had killed & prepared, & was ready to receive his father’s blessing.
Listen to vs’s 33 34. "Isaac trembled violently & said, ‘Who was it, then, that hunted game & brought it to me? I ate it just before you came & I blessed him & indeed he will be blessed!’
“When Esau heard his father’s words, he burst out with a loud & bitter cry & said to his father, ‘Bless me me too, my father!’”
-Dr. Gary Smalley wrote a book entitled, "The Blessing." In it he examines the blessing that Isaac bestowed upon Jacob & he says, "The blessing contains 4 ingredients that ought to be present in every home today.”
“And when those 4 ingredients are present, & practiced consistently, then our children grow up solid, secure & confident of themselves, able to go out into the world & function normally."
But if those ingredients are absent in the home, then too often the child ends up like Esau, steeped in bitterness & anger.
PROP. So let me share with you the 4 ingredients of Isaac’s blessing.
I. MEANINGFUL TOUCH
-Notice vs. 22, "Jacob went close to his father Isaac, who touched him." Vs. 26 says, "Then his father Isaac said to him, ‘Come here, my son, & kiss me."
Now this is not an isolated incident in scripture. Almost every time a blessing is bestowed in Hebrew culture, it involves touching the laying on of hands, a kiss, an embrace something that conveys acceptance & love.
-The 10th chapter of the Gospel of Mark says that people brought children to Jesus so that He could touch them. Jesus took them & placed them on his knee, & laid His hands upon them, & the scripture says, "He blessed them."
Jesus knew exactly what children need to feel loved & accepted. So He touched them & blessed them.
-It’s important to do that in our homes, too. When children are very small you can’t communicate love with words because they don’t understand words yet. But the best way to communicate love to a very small child is by touching them, & holding them close.
-Jacob was 40 years old when Isaac touched & kissed him to convey his blessing. No matter your age, personal contact – a handshake, a hug, a kiss, an embrace – is important to communicate love & acceptance.
-So the first ingredient of the blessing is a meaningful touch.
II. SPOKEN MESSAGES OF AFFECTION & LOVE
-Speak life! Listen as Isaac blesses his son in the last part of vs. 27, "Ah, the smell of my son is like the smell of a field. . ."
-That may not seem like a compliment to some, but to an outdoorsman like Isaac, who thought he was speaking to Esau, the smell of a field about ready for harvest was a great smell. It was a compliment, a positive message that communicated his love.
-You see, too often parents are quick to criticize & remind children of their mistakes. "You dummy, why did you spill the milk?" "You’re lazy." "You can’t do anything right." Words of criticism that really don’t accomplish much. All they do is cause a child to withdraw.
-There is room for constructive criticism. But it’s more important to communicate love through words that say, "You’re worth something. I’m glad that God gave you to us. You’re better than any present I could ever receive."
-Those are words that communicate acceptance & love. And they need to be spoken over & over again, even when our children stumble & fall. Don’t wait until the last minute to do it.
III. REASSURANCE OF THEIR VALUE
-Notice what Isaac says in vs. 28, "May God give you of heaven’s dew & of earth’s richness an abundance of grain & new wine."
-He’s saying, "You’re special, so God will give you the best He has to give." And it is especially important to teach your children, "You’re so valuable that God even came into our world & died on the cross for you."
-But it’s not just by words. We teach this in a number of ways. A lot of times when a child comes, we’re so busy. We have one eye on the TV & one eye on them, & we can’t concentrate on what they’re saying.
-So when a child comes to talk to you, turn off the radio or TV set. Lay aside the newspaper, & listen to what they have to say!
-That communicates value. "You’re worth something. You’re more important to me than the ballgame or newspaper. You’re a valuable part of our family. I’m glad God gave you to us. And whenever you have something you need to talk about, I’m here to listen."
IV. THE HOPE OF A GLORIOUS FUTURE
-In vs. 29 Isaac says to Jacob, "May nations serve you & peoples bow down to you. Be lord over your brothers, & may the sons of your mother bow down to you. May those who curse you be cursed & those who bless you be blessed."
-Isaac is helping him to raise his sights & see that his future is bright.
That is an important responsibility of parents, isn’t it? Maybe you’ve heard Proverbs 22:6: "Train a child in the way he should go, & when he is old he will not turn from it." We’ve always made a spiritual application there, "Teach them the things of God & when they’re old they will not forsake them."
-But there is another application. We’re to help our children find their niche, discover who they are, & why they’ve been made. God made them special.
-So as they’re growing up, help them understand their gifts & talents, & what they’re best suited to do in life. Counsel & guide them to become the kind of person God wants them to be.
-And don’t make the mistake some make as parents by trying to get our children to become what we want them to be, instead of being what God made them to be. I wonder how many people have tried to force their children into becoming something God never equipped them for, or intended them to be.
-Our responsibility as parents is to help them see themselves for who they really are, & to help them prepare for a glorious future.
-A meaningful touch, a spoken message, assuring them of their value, & picturing a glorious future.
CONCL. This morning, God is the perfect parent who has conveyed to us all the ingredients of His blessing in just one verse of scripture. "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son. Whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life."
ILL. I think you are all familiar with the parable that we call the “Story of the Prodigal Son.” Well, I want us to consider it again with a little different twist. Listen to the story in a modern setting as told by Philip Yancey in his book “What’s so Amazing about Grace?”
Yancey tells of a prodigal daughter who grows up in Traverse City, MI. Disgusted with her old fashioned parents whom she believes overreact to her nose ring, the music she listens to, & the length of her skirts, she runs away. She ends up in Detroit where she meets a man who drives the biggest car she’s ever seen.
The man with the big car – she calls him “Boss” – recognizes that since she’s underage, men would pay premium for her. So she goes to work for him. Things seem good for a while – at least no one is trying to get her to change.
But then she gets sick for a few days, & it amazes her how quickly the boss turns mean. Before she knows it, she’s out on the street without a penny to her name. She still turns a couple of tricks a night, & all the money goes to support her drug habit.
One night while sleeping on the metal grates of the city, she began to feel less like a woman of the world & more like a little girl. She begins to whimper. “God, why did I leave? My dog back home eats better than I do now.” She realizes that more than anything in the world, she wants to go home.
Three straight calls home get three straight connections with the answering machine. Finally she leaves a message. “Mom, dad, it’s me. I was wondering about maybe coming home. I’m catching a bus up your way, & it’ll get there about midnight tomorrow. If you’re not there, I‘ll understand.”
During the 7-hour bus ride, she’s preparing a speech for her father. And when the bus comes to a stop in the Traverse City station, the driver announces a 15-minute stop - 15 minutes to decide her life.
She walks into the terminal not knowing what to expect. But not one of the thousand scenes that have played out in her mind prepares her for what she sees. There in the bus terminal in Traverse City, MI, stands a group of 40 brothers & sisters, aunts & uncles, cousins & a grandmother, & a great-grandmother to boot.
They’re all wearing party hats & blowing noise-makers, & taped across the wall of the terminal is a computer-generated banner that reads – “Welcome Home!”
Out of the crowd of well-wishers breaks her dad. She stares out through the tears quivering in her eyes & begins her memorized speech. He interrupts her, “Hush, child. We’ve no time for that. No time for apologies. We’ll be late. A big party is waiting for you at home.”
This morning we offer God’s invitation. A loving Father reaches down to touch us, speak to us, tell us how valuable we are, & help us see the glorious future that we have in Him.
(Sermon Adapted from Melvin Newland, sermoncentral.com)
-I’d like to read a Blessing that a Father wrote for his kids: Maybe your blessing over your kids would sound something like this. As you listen to this, imagine your own Father speaking these words over you. Even if you can’t quite make that connection, you can be sure of this: Your heavenly Father is speaking blessing over you right now! Do you have any idea how much love God has in His heart for you? Listen to this. It might help.
My child, I love you! You are special. You are a gift from God. I thank God for allowing me to be a father to you. I bless you with the healing of all wounds of rejection, neglect and abuse that you have suffered. I bless you with overflowing peace, the peace that only the Prince of Peace can give, a peace beyond comprehension. I bless your life with fruitfulness—good fruit, much fruit and fruit that remains. I bless you with success. You are the head and not the tail; you are above and not beneath. I bless you with health and strength of body, soul and spirit. I bless you with overflowing prosperity, enabling you to be a blessing to others. I bless you with spiritual influence, for you are the light of the world and the salt of the earth. You are like a tree planted by rivers of water. You will prosper in all your ways. I bless you with a depth of spiritual understanding and a close walk with your Lord. You will not stumble or falter, for the Word of God will be a lamp to your feet and a light to your path. I bless you with pure and edifying relationships in life. You have favor with God and man. I bless you with abounding love. You will minister God’s comforting grace to others. You are blessed, my child! You are blessed with all spiritual blessings in Christ Jesus.
Amen! (Billy O’Neal)
