Marriage, By the Book
Genesis 2:18-24
Intro: Children were asked some questions about marriage and dating and such. Here are some of their answers.
.HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?
. Alan age 10 says this: You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
. Kristen age 10 says this: No person really decides before they grow up who they’re going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you’re stuck with.
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
. Camille age 10 said this: Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
. Derrick age 8 said this: You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
. Lori age 8 said this: Both don’t want any more kids.
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
. Lynette age 8 said this: Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
. Martin age 10 said this: On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that Usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
. Craig age 9 said this: I’d run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
. Pam age 7 says: When they’re rich.
. Curt age 7 says: The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn’t want to mess with that.
. Howard age 8 says: The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It’s the right thing to do.
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
. Anita age 9 says: It’s better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN’T GET MARRIED?
. Kelvin age 8 says: There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn’t there?
And the #1 Favorite is........
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
. Ricky age 10 gives us this advice: Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck.
.Soon after our last child left home for college, my wife was resting next to me on the couch with her head in my lap. I carefully removed her glasses. "You know, honey," I said sweetly, "without your glasses you look like the same beautiful young woman I married."
"Honey," she replied with a grin, "without my glasses, you still look pretty good too!"
This morning we are back in Genesis.
. We have looked at creation and the word of God in Chapter 1
. Chapter two gives us a synopsis of the creation again and then the narrative gets into some specifics.
. Lets read our scripture. Genesis 2: 18-24
. 18Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.”
19So the LORD God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and the man chose a name for each one.
20He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals. But still there was no helper just right for him.
21So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the LORD God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening.
22Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man.
23“At last!” the man exclaimed.“This one is bone from my bone,
and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman, ‘because she was taken from ‘man
. 24This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
. Since the beginning, God knew that man could not be happy alone.
. Look at verse 18 again:
. 18Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.”
. God wanted a helper for man so God made all the animals and all the bir5ds trying to find a helper that the man would like.
. Verse 19 & 20 tell us that God brought the animals and the birds to Adam to name and to also see if they would be suitable to him for a helper.
. Look at 19&20 again.
. 19So the LORD God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and the man chose a name for each one.
20He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals. But still there was no helper just right for him.
. In my mind I see God making a bird and sending it to Adam and Adam says you look like a bird so I will call you a bird. The next one looks like a dog so Adam says I will call you dog. The next one looks like a hippopotamus so Adam calls it a hippopotamus. So on and so on.
. Adam spends all day looking at and naming things but at the end of the day, Adam looks at God and says none of these will work. They are not like me. Adam looks at God and asks if He could make someone who was like him. Someone who had the same attributes that God had given to him.
. God gave Adam the first dose of anesthesia;
. Look at verse 21 again:
. 21So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the LORD God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening.
. God put Adam into a deep sleep and performed the first operation. He opened him up, took out a rib and closed him back up.
. God then used that to make a helper for Adam. Someone who would be on an equal basis with him. Someone who would have the same attributes as Adam. God made them both in His image.
.Look at what happens in verses 22&23 again.
. 22Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man.
23“At last!” the man exclaimed.“This one is bone from my bone,
and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman, ‘because she was taken from ‘man
. Adam was ecstatic. At last he says. I looked at all these other creatures and I just knew that they were not suitable as a helper for me.
. But God, you have hit the jackpot right here.
. She is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. I have a partner. A helper and someone to share everything with.
. Matthew Henry in his commentary on these verses said it better than I ever could. He wrote:
. Eve was “not made out of his head to top him, not out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be beloved”.
. There she was, the perfect partner or help meet as the KJV says.
. I gave this running commentary in order to get to verse 24 here in Genesis. I want to spend the rest of our time this morning right here in Verse 24..
. You see, right here we see Marriage by the book. Exactly what God has intended and expects from a marriage.
. Look at verse 24 again with me.
. 24This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
. The first thing we see here is that when a man and woman get married they are to:
. Leave
. Folks when two people get married they are to leave the family that they were born into.
. God is not talking about automatically leaving the house that your parents have.
. In fact, neither before Moses, the one who penned this scripture, nor after Moses was it ever the custom to literally leave the parents home.
. The man would actually build a room onto his fathers house for him and his new bride to live in. The new wife came into the family unit.
. That’s why the betrothal period was so long back in Jesus’ day.
. It was normally a year or more to give time for the man to build suitable space for him and his bride.
. This command to leave his family was a command to place a new priority in their lives.
. While they are still part of the old family that they were born into, now they have a new family and this new family is the priority.
. We never forget our parents, in fact we are commanded to honor our fathers and mothers; but when a man and a woman get married, there is a new family, one of their own making and that family has the priority.
. I goggled divorce rates in America and this is what I found.
. 50% of all marriages in the United States end in divorce.
. Sadly, if you look at Christians overall, the rates are almost the same.
. I believe that much of the problem is that so many today never leave their parents. They never establish their first loyalties.
. They allow their old family to interfere with their new family.
. That is not how God created the family unit.
. When we marry, we are to leave the priorities of our birth family and make our new family the priority in our lives.
. Next we see that we are to:
. Cleave
. The KJV version of this verse translates this way.
24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
. We are to cleave to each other.
. Men you are to cleave to your wife.
. The word cleave here is the word for glue. As you cleave to one another through good times and hard times, you grow closer.
. Your bond needs to become like super glue.
. When they were getting ready to put the sign in out front here, the sing man told me that we needed to dill some holes in the footing and place some metal rods in there to keep the sign from blowing over. I said that I wished that he had told me this before we poured the the footing because I would have anchored them into the footing and we would have had more stability. He showed me something though that would solve the problem. He has an epoxy that you put into the hole to strengthen it. He said that the footing would rip out of the ground before the epoxy or glue would break. The epoxy would cleave to the concrete.
. That’s what God is telling us here. Everything else can be torn up, all the way down to the foundation and it can crumble but you need to cleave to your spouse.
. Nothing should be able to pull you apart.
. We must leave our old lives and cleave to our spouses and start a new life together.
. Not a only are we to Leave and cleave to our spouse, we are also supposed to:
. Weave
. Look at vs 24 again
. . 24This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
. We are to be united into one.
. Now I’m not a weaver or a crocheter but I understand the concept. You take separate parts and weave them together to create something. You unite these different parts and they become united together as one.
. That’s what God is telling us. Yes you are two different people but now you are united as one.
. You weave this marriage into one cohesive unit by leaving the old life that you had and uniting to form a new life by cleaving to your spouse.
. There is some good news in the divorce statistics that I looked at.
. When you take out those Christians that say they attend church on a regular basis, the rate among them drops by more than 20%.
. When we look to God on a regular basis for our strength and guidance, He will make a difference in our lives.
. God’s word has all the answers folks.
. Here in Genesis, He tells us how to be Married by the book.
. His word also tells us how we can live with him in eternity through the blood of Jesus Christ.
. Invitation.
*** To my Christian brothers and sisters, thank you for taking the time to read this sermon. I ask that you take another second and score this for me. I am always open to feedback so that I can continue to grow in the proclamation of God’s word.
May God bless you as you continue to strive to walk worthy of His calling.
Sources: The Holy Bible, NLT
Illustrations from sermon central
Genesis, Beginning and Blessing, R. Kent Hughes
Matthew Henry, Commentary on Genesis
