The Genesis of Relationships
Genesis 3:1-13
How many of you have seen the TV show, “Modern Family”? It’s a representation of the diversity of the American Family today with a father and his second wife and blended family, his adult daughter and her husband and kids, and his son and his male life partner and their adopted Asian daughter. It’s about how they share life together as a family but more importantly how they love one another. When you think about the evolution of family sitcoms, we see a growing embrace of the diversity of families: from “I Love Lucy” “Ozzie and Harriet” and my childhood favorite, “Leave It to Beaver.” In the 1960’s, there was the Brady Bunch about a blended family. In the 1970’s, it was the “Jeffersons” and “All in the Family” In the 1980’s it was “Families Ties”, “Different Strokes” and my favorite, “The Cosby Show.” In the 1990’s, it was “Rosanne” and “Married with Children” and “Family Matters.”
Families! They come in all shapes, sizes and expressions. I used to think that my family was pretty normal but not anymore. I had a dad who was a double amputee from diabetes and eventually died from that horrible disease. I have a brother and sister-in-law who are estranged from their oldest son because his wife’s psychological issues and she won’t let them see her grandkids or her husband see his parents. My oldest niece married an abusive, control freak and divorced him within a year. Her brother married a girl who ended up having psychological issues and they divorced. My other sister is a recovering alcoholic and has a two boys, one of whom has was in and out of juvi, has two kids out of wedlock and is involved in drugs. He and his brother don’t even talk to each other. And then there’s my family: they have to deal with me. So much for normal!
What is normal today for the American family? More importantly, what does God want for us as families? To answer that, we’re going to focus on the first families of the Bible in Genesis. Genesis is a book about relationships. And what we’ll see is that none of them were normal. In the midst of their brokenness, we see God’s grace, healing and calling at work. In this series, we are going to be talking about all kinds of families and relationships. But today, we’re talking about our primary relationship, the most important relationship of all and that’s with God. If we don’t have a good relationships with God and we’re not working on it on a daily basis, all our relationships flat-out just don’t work! Jesus said the greatest commandment is this: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your mind, all your strength.” But then the second was this, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Those two are connected to each other. Until you build a great relationship with God, you can’t truly love your neighbor as yourself. The first precedes the latter and makes the latter possible. Our relationship with God impacts every other relationship we have. So until we have a healthy, growing and close relationship with God, we’ll never be able to demonstrate God’s love in our other relationships.
God is relational. God wants to be in relationship with us. That’s why He created us!
Second, we’re created for relationship. We are created in God’s image. And because of that, we are relational. Genesis 1: 27 says, “So God created human beings in his own image, in the image of God he created them, male and female he created them.” God doesn’t just want relationship with us. He wants relationships for us. For God said “it is not good for human beings to be alone.” Our relationships not only feed our soul but they help us become who we are. You become like who you hang out with. That’s the power of connectedness. This is why developing the primary, personal relationship with God on a daily basis is so important. We’re not only created in God’s image, He wants us to become like Him.
We are not only created to be in relationships, we need relationships with others. But we know that when we don’t have connections with others, we’re not healthy. I don’t know about you, but I’m a broken person. Can any of you identify with that? And it only gets worse when we’re separated from others. The state of Mississippi has recently closed most of its solitary confinement cells where inmates would spend 23 hours a day and only one hour outside. Why? Because they learned that separation from others just led to more problems and mental health issues. That speaks to the fact that we’re meant to be in relationships with others. And when we are together, even in our brokenness, we are better off because through relationships, we can heal and grow. When we, who are struggling and broken, are connected to other believers, we are not only healthier but we can grow in our faith as they speak God’s purpose in our life, pronounce God’s grace in us, correct us and cheer us on in living for Christ. This is why the writer of Hebrews says, “Let us consider how we may spur one another towards love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another.”
There are consequences when we quit working on or ignore our primary relationship. Sin enters the world. Sin is simply not doing the will of God. And that starts first with ignoring God as our primary relationship in life and the impact can be devastating. First, our view and understanding of God becomes distorted. The serpent got Eve to believe that God was holding back his blessings and that’s the reason why God didn’t want her to eat of the fruit of the tree. When we begin to doubt God’s goodness, God’s love, God’s intentions, or we even doubt God’s existence, then we are tempted to be our own god by determining our own destinies, setting our own boundaries and choosing our own path.
Second, we distance ourselves from God. This is sin’s impact in our lives. It distances us from God and His will. Verse 8 says, “Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord as he was walking in the Garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God amongst the trees of the Garden.” God is not the one hiding, we are. We’re the ones who are running from God. Sin isolates us from God and will cut you off from the source of life. Third, it impacts the lives of those around us. After eating, Eve gave some of the fruit to Adam. Not only that, but when God inquires what happened, Adam answers, “She made me do it!” And then Eve blames the serpent. Fourth, when we lose touch with God, we begin to live as sensual persons instead of spiritual persons. Our decisions are made on the basis of our appetites and our passions rather than the desires of God. Eve saw that the fruit looked good and tasty. It was desirable to the eyes and began to want it thinking it would satisfy, so all of a sudden we think we’re going to find life in such things as materialism, self-focus, and selfishness. We confuse spirituality with sensuality, and notice how this spin begins to break down every relationship in our life.
Fifth, we lose trust. “The Lord called to the man “where are you?”, and the man answered, “I heard you in the Garden and I was afraid.” When we are isolated from God because we have sinned, we begin to fear God rather than trust him. Remember the Bible says, “perfect love casts out all fear.” 1 John 4:18 Fear cripples faith. When we are gripped by fear, we cease to take to step into God’s future. We cease to step out in faith and to take great risks for the kingdom of God. The reality is If you aren’t right with God, aren’t immersed in His love and close to him every day, it impacts every other part of our life.
But does God abandon us? No! God comes looking for us when we can’t find our way back. God is a God of grace, mercy and restoration. God is the lover who pursues us when we are running and hiding from God. Isn’t that amazing? God still has a plan for redemption and He seeks to include us in that. God takes broken people who aren’t yet together; and uses them to accomplish His will and plan of salvation. There is always redemption available. I love it. What we see here in Genesis is that whatever we are dealing with, wherever we’re experiencing brokenness in our lives, God’s love is our refuge, our Hope, our strength and our Healing because “There is nothing that can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus.”
So the challenge for us is to work at our primary relationship with God every day. How? Through the Means of Grace, which are five practices we as Methodists follow to grow our relationship with God. First is prayer. Second is daily Scripture reading.. Third is weekly worship and Holy Communion. Fourth is accountability by being in a small group Bible study where we learn God’s Word, His will and God’s ways and share life together as we intentionally seek to live for Christ. Fifth is fasting. The purpose of fasting should be to take our eyes off the things of this world to focus completely on God. Fasting is a way to demonstrate to God, and to ourselves, that we are serious about our relationship with Him. Fasting helps us gain a new perspective and a renewed reliance upon God.
But here’s the catch. Unless you regularly practice the Means of Grace, you limit God’s grace and power in your life and diminish your relationship to Him. God cannot give you what you do not put yourself in a position to receive. It’s kind of like a lamp in your living room that never gets plugged in. It may look good and you can turn the switch but there’s no power. You have to take responsibility for your spiritual journey and your relationship to Christ. No one else can develop your relationship with Christ for you. Only you are responsible for where you are right now spiritually and only you can decide if you want to make God first in your life and your relationship to Him your primary relationship. That means you have to make your relationship to God your first priority and everything else comes second. That means spending time with God every day but also giving him your best time? Relationships are not just about what you commit to or take, they’re also about what you give up. Jesus wants all of you and if you’re going to make Jesus your life, something’s gotta give. You’ve got to reprioritize to make the time available for Him.
