"The Adornment that Attracts" Pt. 2
1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.
8 Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.
9 Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing.
Intro: First, let me make sure that we understand what kind of adornment we are talking about and where it's at. Peter is speaking of spiritual adornment and he tells us where this adornment is at. It is in the "inner man of the heart" What can we find in this passage to learn about adornment that is attractive? I am going to focus on just three things although there are many more here.
I think I'm safe in saying that the word "...likewise..." is the key our understanding of this passage. Basically, Peter is saying what is "good for the goose is good for the gander!" Men are to have spiritual adornments too. They are to adorn the "...inner man..." and make this inner man as attractive as possible for Christ.
I. Adorn Yourself with Respect
To "...dwell..." is to live together qualified by the phrase "...according to knowledge..." There must be honor given unto the wife and we have several reasons given for the foundation of that honor. But the word τιμη honor, signifies maintenance as well as respect; - maintain, provide for the wife. This relationship should be characterized by the recognition of:
a. The spousal consideration
The phrase "...according to knowledge..." involves what one writer referred to as "intelligent recognition." The husband is to live with his wife with consideration for her. Both men and women are "vessels" and both are weak in the sight of our Creator but the wife is generally speaking the weaker of the two and the husband should take that into account.
It is a saying of the Jews (s),
"if thy wife be short of stature, bow thyself, and whisper to her.
The meaning of the proverb is, that he ought to suit himself to her capacity and weakness:
Weaker does not mean she is weaker intellectually or even spiritually and the next phrase speaks to that issue.
b. The spiritual consideration
Joint-heirs of the grace of life (sunklēronomoi charitos zōēs). Late double compound found in an Ephesian inscription and the papyri, in N.T. only here, Romans 8:17; Ephesians 3:6; Hebrews 11:9. God's gift of life eternal belongs to woman as well as to man. In the eyes of God the wife may be superior to the husband, not merely equal. Robertson's Word Pictures
c. The supplicants' consideration
Hindered: The word means, literally, to knock in; make an incision into; and hence, generally, to hinder or thwart Galatians 5:7; 1 Thessolonians 2:18. Some, however, read ἐκκόπτεσθαι, to cut off or destroy. Vincents Word Studies
How many of you have ever had a dropped call, or got cut off while you were on the phone or if you are like us, lost your cable signal during a storm? The prayers of a man who does not given due consideration to his wife will find that his prayers go unanswered. Not giving your wife due consideration "short circuits" your prayers. We could say that the success or failure of your prayer life is in direct relation to the spousal and spiritual consideration you give to your wife.
II. Adorn Yourself with Righteousness
"Finally, be ye all of one mind... Not that the apostle was about to conclude his epistle; but having finished his exhortations respecting the obedience of subjects to magistrates, and of servants to their masters, and the duties incumbent on husbands and wives, he proceeds to sum up what he had further to say, in general rules; which regarded all sorts of Christians, magistrates and subjects, masters and servants, husbands and wives, parents and children, old and young, rich and poor, of whatsoever state, age, sex, or condition; and so the Arabic version renders it, "the sum of the commandment is"; and the Ethiopic version, "the sum of all is this"; namely, what follows; "be ye all of one mind"; whatever difference there might be in their natural and civil relation and character; and which is to be understood not of the sameness of affection to one another, or of an humble and condescending spirit, disposition, and carriage to each other, for these are expressed in some following exhortations; but of sameness of judgment with respect to the doctrines and ordinances of the Gospel, in which saints should be perfectly joined together in the same mind, and in the same judgment; for as the church is but one body, of which Christ is the head, there should be but one mind in it; even as there is but one Spirit of God, who convinces, enlightens, and leads into truth; and but one heart and way, given to fear the Lord; and there is but one hope of our calling, or to which we are called; and one way to it, and therefore ought to agree in everything respecting the way, the truth, and the life; though in things which do not, should bear with one another; and there is but one Lord, who gives the same laws and ordinances to one as to another, and which are to be kept a like by all; and there is but one faith, one doctrine of faith, which is uniform and all of a piece, and but one rule and standard of faith, the sacred Scriptures, and but one baptism, to be administered in the same way, and upon the same sort of subjects, and in the same name of the Father, Son, and Spirit; and but one God and Father of all; all belong to the same family, and therefore should preserve a unity of spirit and mind, and speak the same things; which is necessary to carry on the worship of God, honorably and regularly, to the glorifying of him, and for the peace, comfort, and safety of the churches of Christ, having compassion one of another; or sympathizing with each other, both in prosperity and adversity, whether in temporal or spiritual things; rejoicing with them that rejoice in Christ, make their boast of him, and have communion with him, and who are also blessed with health of body, and a competency of the good things of this life; and weeping with them that weep for the loss of goods, relations, &c. and being in bonds and afflictions; or because of sin, the absence of Christ, and the temptations of Satan; and being concerned also for such who are fallen into immorality, or error, and heresy; endeavoring to restore them out of the one or the other, in a spirit of meekness and tenderness: to all which they should be engaged by the example of Christ, the sympathizing high priest; by the consideration of the divine compassion to them, both in a providential way, and in a way of grace; and on account of their union and relation to each other, as members of the same body: Gill's Exposition of the Entire Bible
Many of these qualities can be summed up in the same way that Dr. Warren Wiesbe wrote his "Be" series of books. We are exhorted to:
a. Be compassionate verse 8a
The Bible makes it plain that compassion is what separates us from others. We are told in Jude 1:22 "And of some have compassion, making a difference:" This word is often translated sympathizing.
KEEPING COMPASSION
ILL - Finding his newly-appointed pastor standing at his study window in the church weeping as he looked over the inner city's tragic conditions, a layman sought to console him: "Don't worry. After you've been here a while, you'll get used to it."
Responded the minister, "Yes, I know. That's why I am crying."
SOURCE: David DeWitt in "Is Jesus Still Weeping?" on www.sermoncentral.com.
b. Be caring verse 8c
We are told to "...love the brethren..." or literally love as brethren
HOW CHRISTIANS ARE DIFFERENT
ILL - A Second Century believer, in a letter to his friend, Diognetus, described how Christians are alike and different from others. He wrote, "Though they are residents at home in their own countries, their behavior there is more like transients...Though destiny has placed them here in the flesh, they do not live after the flesh; their days are passed on earth, but their citizenship is above in the heavens. They obey the prescribed laws, but in their own private lives they transcend the laws. They show love to all men--and all men persecute them. They are misunderstood and condemned; yet by suffering death they are quickened into life. They are poor, yet making many rich; lacking all things, yet having all things in abundance...They repay [curses] with blessings, and abuse with courtesy. For the good they do, they suffer stripes as evildoers."
(James Bryan Smith, The Good and Beautiful Community, IVP, 2010, pp.28-29. From a sermon by C. Philip Green, Living Stones, 5/19/2011)
c. Be comforting verse 8d
On here in the NT and basically it means to be tender-hearted.
Ephesians 4:32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
COMPASSION'S REWARD
Born over sixty years ago in Yugoslavia, she responded to God's call on her life while still a teenager. A missionary's strong challenge to give her life to teaching in India resulted in her appointment to the city of Calcutta. Some months later she saw a sight which completely revolutionized her life, and would ultimately bring her world-wide fame as Good Housekeeping magazine's "Most-Admired-Woman" selection. What was the sight? A homeless, dying woman lying in the gutter, being eaten by rats. Compassion compelled her to beg an abandoned Hindu temple from the government, and convert it into a crude make-shift hospital for the dying. A comment of her's became her life's thrust: "If there is a God in heaven, and a Christ we love, nobody should die alone." This woman who established colonies for over 10,000 lepers in 28 cities was interviewed by Malcolm Muggeridge from the BBC News. "Mother Teresa, the thing I noticed about you and the hundreds of sisters who now form your team is that you all look so happy. Is that a put-on?"
She replied, "Oh no, not at all. Nothing makes you happier than when you really reach out in mercy to someone who is badly hurt.
Service is its own reward. True mercy begets genuine joy.
SOURCE: Robert Schuller, The Be-Happy Attitudes, pages 135-137. Bantam Books, Reissue edition (July 1, 1987).
d. Be courteous verse 8e
Courteous -- genuine Christian politeness; not the tinsel of the world's politeness; stamped with unfeigned love on one side, and humility on the other. But the oldest manuscripts read, "humble-minded." It is slightly different from "humble," in that it marks a conscious effort to be truly humble. Jameson, Fausset and Brown Commentary
THE GENTLE GAIN
ILL - "In our rough-and-rugged individualism, we think of gentleness as weakness, being soft, and virtually spineless. Not so! ... Gentleness includes such enviable qualities as having strength under control, being calm and peaceful when surrounded by a heated atmosphere, emitting a soothing effect on those who may be angry or otherwise beside themselves, and possessing tact and gracious courtesy that causes others to retain their self-esteem and dignity.... Instead of losing, the gentle gain. Instead of being ripped off and taken advantage of, they come out ahead! "
SOURCE: Charles R. Swindoll.
ILL - Small courtesies, small considerations, habitually practiced in our daily lives, give a greater charm to the character than any display of great talents or accomplishments. M.A. Kelty
DEALING WITH DIVISIVE PEOPLE
Ray Stedman said, "Some people for the sake of their point of view would destroy the unity of your church. How do you deal with them? Avoid them. We must keep our eye on them and turn away from them. In other words, we don't listen to them. We're never obligated to hear a person out when what they're saying is not consistent with Christian speech. If they are tearing down the church, tearing down the pastor, tearing down the leaders or Sunday School teachers or any believer, we should not listen. Because even out of a misguided sense of courtesy, our listening to them would make it seem that we agree, while what we're doing is giving them another chance to vent their verbal poison."
(From a sermon by Bob Joyce, Paul's Missionary Heart, 8/3/2011)
e. Be conciliatory verse 9
Don't retaliate when someone does evil to you, don't revile someone who reviles you, but just the opposite, be a blessing knowing that God will bless you or has blessed you. Be a peacemaker, be a blesser and not a blaster!
WHO AM I HURTING?
ILL - When we hate our enemies we give them power over us - power over our sleep, our appetites, our happiness. They would dance with joy if they knew how much they were worrying us. Our hate is not hurting them at all, but it is turning our days & our nights into hellish turmoil.
Dale Carnegie
1 Peter 3:10 For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile:
ILL - In the NT, the word for peace means "to reconcile or join." Some missionary Bible translators were working very hard to find a word for peace in a particular tribal language. At last, a native who was working with them found a combination of words that captured the concept--"a heart that sits down." When the heart sits down with Jesus--when we join with God through his Son--there is peace.
Conclusion: Verses 10-13 are a restatement of truths already mentioned in this message:
10 For "Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit;
11 let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it.
12 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil."
