Have you ever felt like life never goes the way you plan it? In my life, I had plans to do different things. When I was young, before even being a teen I wanted to be a professional football player. I used to play backyard football with all my friends and with my favorite cousin, Tim. We would win all the time against my oldest brother and his best friend. I thought for sure I would be a pro football player. I didn’t realize there was so much pain involved until I joined the midget football team. Boy did that help me to realize that it wasn’t my calling in life!
I played football all the way through high school on the football team but the reality is that I was never one to look for and enjoy the full-contact part of the sport. At one point, I wanted to be a rock star lead singer. At the time I idolized the lead singers from groups like Foreigner, Styx, Loverboy and even Queen. Then I wanted to be an artist… and low and behold I did end up doing that.
But life takes funny turns sometimes. There were things that happened in life that weren’t what I would consider… the things in life that I wanted to happen. There was physical abuse, sexual abuse and divorce in my family growing up. There was alcoholism and other things that I don’t need to mention any more about but you get the idea. Life is not perfect. Life is messy and actually very much NOT perfect.
As I read through our scriptures this week I was reminded that the scriptures don’t hold anything back. I guess what I am saying is that even though God is the creator and made things perfect; the whole reality is that when Adam and Eve took of the apple in the garden. Things REALLY got messed up for us many generations later.
Let’s take a look at what was going on with Joseph’s older brother Judah in the book of Genesis 38. And keep in mind that Judah grew up in a home of his father Jacob, one of the great patriarchs of our faith.
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1. Life never goes as planned (by us!)
Judah and Tamar
1At that time, Judah left his brothers and went down to stay with a man of Adullam named Hirah. 2There Judah met the daughter of a Canaanite man named Shua. He married her and lay with her; 3she became pregnant and gave birth to a son, who was named Er. 4She conceived again and gave birth to a son and named him Onan.
5She gave birth to still another son and named him Shelah. It was at Kezib that she gave birth to him. 6Judah got a wife for Er, his firstborn, and her name was Tamar. 7But Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the LORD’s sight; so the LORD put him to death.
Let’s take a break in the reading for a moment to recognize exactly what has happened here ok? First of all we see that Judah, a son of Jacob leaves his family to hang out with a friend of his instead of attending to the flocks of his father.
I am wondering in my heart if Judah didn’t meet with this woman some other time before this coincidence. Judah left his family, moves down and now is all of a sudden married to a Canaanite woman. Do you remember how Abraham and Jacob felt about Canaanite people? Not good! So I am sure Judah didn’t get permission from dad. So, probably against the wishes of his Godly father and relatives, Judah marries a woman of no or not good faith. And then he sleeps with her and gets married. Do you see where things are going here?
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Listen to what is says in Gal. 6:7-9
“Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. 8The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that naturea will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. 9Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”
You know how sometimes God allows us to reap what we sow? Well, Judah was not doing the Lords will and look what happens. Shua has a baby and what is he like? Yep, he is wicked and the Lord kills him! I am sure the mother of his son and the people around him were influencing him and not in a good way. So, he loses his first son because he is not in the Lords will in many ways.
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2. When not following the Lord we reap what we sow.
So now Judah has a daughter-in-law to take care of right? Let’s continue on…
8Then Judah said to Onan (which is Judah’s second son), “Lie with your brother’s wife and fulfill your duty to her as a brother-in-law to produce offspring for your brother.”
9But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so whenever he lay with his brother’s wife, he spilled his semen on the ground to keep from producing offspring for his brother. 10What he did was wicked in the LORD’s sight; so he put him to death also.
So here we are again! This is starting to look like something that would show up on one of those shows that has all the drama and people spilling all their dirt all over the TV.
So now, Judah has lost his second son, why? So let’s make sure we have this straight…
Judah left his family behind to go to a place where his buddy was and we know his family wouldn’t approve of. And secondly, he married a woman that we know his family and the Lord as well… wouldn’t approve of. Do I have this right? And what are the results?
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3. Not following the Lords will in life, makes bad things happen.
Now, let me pause just for a minute to talk to the young people ok? In my life I have seen many youth who when they grew up wanted nothing more to do than to run from their parents, their home… and their church and do whatever they wanted. They were finally free and they were going to live it up baby!
Well let me tell you the rest of the story… each of those parents prayed without ceasing for their children. The parents followed their children by calling them or talking to friends and neighbors to find out how their children were really doing. As a pastor I hear about what those children are doing. Some are getting divorced, some are hooked on partying and alcohol… and some are so miserable they will do anything to get away from how hard life is.
But do you know where life truly is? It’s not out there in the world and in the flesh as these young adults found out. Remember what I said a couple of weeks ago about Jesus? Jesus said, I am the way, the truth and what? That is right the Life! Jesus is the life that all these people want but they are so caught up in having everything for themselves that they pass up the most important thing they could find… and some of them already had found in church. They can have eternal life in heaven, with Jesus! With Angels and streets of gold.
So kids, if you ever find yourself as an adult, mad at the world and how it never, ever goes how you want it to no matter how hard you try. I am telling you that Jesus is going to be calling you and reminding you… I am the way, the truth and the life.
Can you do me a favor? Answer yes if you will listen to him and say yes… and come back to church. Come back to God and live the life you were meant to live. Not perfect but with God, all things are possible.
Let’s continue on with our reading:
11Judah then said to his daughter-in-law Tamar, “Live as a widow in your father’s house until my son Shelah grows up.” For he thought, “He may die too, just like his brothers.” So Tamar went to live in her father’s house.
12After a long time Judah’s wife, the daughter of Shua, died. When Judah had recovered from his grief, he went up to Timnah, to the men who were shearing his sheep, and his friend Hirah the Adullamite went with him.
13When Tamar was told, “Your father-in-law is on his way to Timnah to shear his sheep,”
14she took off her widow’s clothes, covered herself with a veil to disguise herself, and then sat down at the entrance to Enaim, which is on the road to Timnah. For she saw that, though Shelah had now grown up, she had not been given to him as his wife.
The custom of levirate marriage, that is marrying your deceased brother’s wife, which is first mentioned in this chapter, and is found in different forms among Indians, Persians, and other nations of Asia and Africa, was not founded upon a divine command, but upon an ancient tradition, originating probably in Chaldea. Although later in the Bible in Deuteronomy it is specified to be important for the early believers.
Wow, now remember a moment ago Judah told Tamar to go back and live with her family in her father’s house? Well now it is years later and she still doesn’t have a husband as she is waiting for Judah to call her and tell her that she is now going to be the wife of his youngest son Shelah. Well, apparently that call never came.
And it says in Verse 14 that she even wore clothing that a widow would wear and I am sure no guy would be interesting in marrying her with that situation in her life. What a bad situation that Judah has but Tamar in. Well let’s continue on with our reading…
15When Judah saw her, he thought she was a prostitute, for she had covered her face. 16Not realizing that she was his daughter-in-law, he went over to her by the roadside and said, “Come now, let me sleep with you.”
“And what will you give me to sleep with you?” she asked.
17“I’ll send you a young goat from my flock,” he said.
“Will you give me something as a pledge until you send it?” she asked.
18He said, “What pledge should I give you?”
“Your seal and its cord, and the staff in your hand,” she answered. So he gave them to her and slept with her, and she became pregnant by him.19After she left, she took off her veil and put on her widow’s clothes again.
20Meanwhile Judah sent the young goat by his friend the Adullamite in order to get his pledge back from the woman, but he did not find her. 21He asked the men who lived there, “Where is the shrine prostitute who was beside the road at Enaim?”“There hasn’t been any shrine prostitute here,” they said.
22So he went back to Judah and said, “I didn’t find her. Besides, the men who lived there said, ‘There hasn’t been any shrine prostitute here.’”23Then Judah said, “Let her keep what she has, or we will become a laughingstock.
After all, I did send her this young goat, but you didn’t find her.”
24About three months later Judah was told, “Your daughter-in-law Tamar is guilty of prostitution, and as a result she is now pregnant.” Judah said, “Bring her out and have her burned to death!”
25As she was being brought out, she sent a message to her father-in-law. “I am pregnant by the man who owns these,” she said. And she added, “See if you recognize whose seal and cord and staff these are.”
26Judah recognized them and said, “She is more righteous than I, since I wouldn’t give her to my son Shelah.” And he did not sleep with her again.
27When the time came for her to give birth, there were twin boys in her womb. 28As she was giving birth, one of them put out his hand; so the midwife took a scarlet thread and tied it on his wrist and said, “This one came out first.” 29But when he drew back his hand, his brother came out, and she said, “So this is how you have broken out!” And he was named Perez.a 30Then his brother, who had the scarlet thread on his wrist, came out and he was given the name Zerah.
Is Judah… in the line of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, so much better than Tamar?
Judah just asked for her to be burned alive didn’t he? But what does the end result indicate about Judah? He slept with a prostitute (or whom he thought was one) and he was a liar. This is not exactly a stellar reputation to be a leader of his family and what do you think about him becoming a leader in the early stages of believers in God?
But Judah isn’t alone in blowing it as a believer in God:
Let’s look at some great people of the Lord and how they were perfect as well.
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How about Noah? Tell me about Noah ok?
Great and righteous man right? Created the Ark, chosen by God to sustain everything on the earth right? Both man and animal… and care for the plants as well right?
Read Genesis 9:21
The reality is that he might not have even known it was wine with alcohol in it. But whether he knew or not, that is not the point. We are not perfect and sometimes we fall into things that we don’t expect or want to happen.
What about Abraham? Tell me about Abraham ok? How many times did he lie about his wife being his sister?
What about Paul? Tell me about Paul from the NT now ok?
Before the road to Damascus… he killed Christians for a living!
Are you getting the picture here about some of the best people of the Bible?
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4. In everyday messy life, God is still there
This chapter gives an account of Judah and his family, and such a messy situation that it is, that it seems amazing and unexpected that of all Jacob's sons, our Lord Jesus comes from the lineage of Judah. Look with me at Matthew Chapter 1.
But God will show that his choice is of grace and not of merit, and that Christ came into the world to save sinners, even the chief. Also, that the worthiness of Christ is of himself, and not from his ancestors. How little reason had the Jews, who were so called from this Judah, to boast as they did, John 8:41. What awful examples the Lord proclaims in his punishments, of his utter displeasure at sin! Let us seek grace from God to avoid every appearance of sin. And let that state of humbleness to which Jesus submitted, when he came to put away sin by the sacrifice of himself, in appointing such characters as those here recorded, to be his ancestors, endear the Redeemer to our hearts.
As studied and read these scriptures over and over again this week. The Lord was impressing upon my heart that God loves me and just as Judah and others weren’t perfect. God knows that we aren’t perfect. And yet, He wants to use us, just as we are. Did you hear that?
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5. God wants to use us, just as we are!
No matter how bad you have blown it, no matter how far you have strayed. God, the Father loves you. And He is waiting for you! As the title of the message says… Perfect, you’re NOT perfect… God. God doesn’t want perfect people because it is through our imperfection that God is made perfect.
