Marks of a God Pleaser
1 Thessalonians 4:1-8
Intro: How important is it for a person to please God? The Bible really has a lot to say about this. First, we know that without faith or trust in God, it is impossible to please Him (Heb. 11:1). Most people don’t worry about pleasing God unless they believe that He is real and that He rewards those who seek Him wholeheartedly. Is there anything else that pleases God? We could wrap several related ideas up together and say that love, obedience, purity or holiness, goodness, generosity, humility, and more, are pleasing to God! Doing the right thing for the right reason pleases God!
-Now Paul writes in 1 Thess. 4:1-8 about a specific area in which we should all please the Lord. It has to do with our desires, more specifically with sexual desires. You don’t have to read very far into the Old Testament to see that sexual desire was actually a gift from God when used correctly within the marital relationship. However, the 3rd book of the OT, Leviticus, goes into great detail about what kinds of sexual desires and activities are offensive to God and are considered immoral. Unfortunately, many cultures, including our own, have redefined what is okay and what is not. In fact, just about the only sexual boundary our culture protects and feels strongly about (and rightfully so) is in the areas of incest or rape.
-God has called us to please Him in all areas of our lives! And He offers to help us live a life that honors Him and does no harm to ourselves or others. What’s more, God is ready and willing to forgive those who have fallen into the trap of sexual sin, giving in to sinful desires. However, they must reach a place where they are willing to fully repent, confess their sins, and more often than not, seek help to overcome sexual addictions.
-So let’s take a look at 5 marks of a God Pleaser relating to the area of sexual purity.
1. God Pleasers avoid sexual immorality
1 Thessalonians 4:1-3 1 Finally, brothers, we instructed you how to live in order to please God, as in fact you are living. Now we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus to do this more and more. 2 For you know what instructions we gave you by the authority of the Lord Jesus. 3 It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality;
-In Greek and Roman cultures, such practices as premarital sex, intercourse with slaves and prostitutes, and male homosexual behavior were allowed. However, the Jews, who had the Law of God, reserved sex for marriage, even though there were always some who deviated from this standard.
-When Paul visited Thessalonica and shared the good news about Jesus, he taught the believers that sex was to be reserved only for marriage. Apparently, when Timothy visited there, he became aware that some were not reserving sex for the marriage relationship, but continuing in their formerly pagan ways, and possibly committing adultery (v.6). That is why (presumably) Paul wrote this passage in 1 Thess. 4. It might be good for us to take a quick look at the Biblical foundations Paul was standing on as he so strictly confined the release of sexual passion to the marriage relationship.
-The 7th commandment gives us the most familiar instruction: Exodus 20:14 “You shall not commit adultery.” Adultery means having sexual relations with someone else’s spouse, or with anyone besides your spouse if you are married. And even pre-marital sex can be considered adultery b/c it involves someone else’s future spouse.
-Fornication – ðïñíåßᾳ (PORNEIA) – any form of illegitimate sexual activity, unbridled passion, prostitution. Fornication generally applies to unmarried persons, since adultery implies a married person.
• 1 Corinthians 7:2 “But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.”
• Galatians 5:19 “Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality….”
• Leviticus 19:29 "Do not defile your daughter by making her a prostitute, or the land will be filled with prostitution and wickedness." (NLT)
-Homosexuality
• Leviticus 18:22 You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination.
• Romans 1:26-27 26 Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. 27 In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.
• 1 Corinthians 6:9 Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders.
-So, without needing to go any further into what sexual immorality means, the most important thing for someone who wants to please God is to avoid it! Now how can we avoid it? After all, it is accepted as normal on TV, at school, at work, in pop songs, in movies, and in many books. It even creeps into the political arena with many voices saying it’s okay. And yes, there are churches who attempt to redefine and modify what God has said about it in His word, saying that God gave people their passions so they must be okay. Let me just say that you can always find someone to agree with you, no matter where you stand. But that doesn’t make you right!
-How do we avoid sexual immorality? Well, some of the main thoughts of these verses will help us, but let me throw out a couple of thoughts before we move ahead. 1.) Guard your heart! Keep your love for God alive and thriving! Stay connected with Him! Talk with Him daily. Ask Him to keep you pure! Also, if you’re married, keep your marriage alive. Love your spouse! Learn to communicate openly. Talk about temptations you have. 2.) Guard your influences! Cut off any known access you have to relationships or habits that would steer you toward sexual immorality. Pornography is dangerous and can pull you into bondage and temptation. Be careful what you look at! Jesus said in Matthew 5:28 “…everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” The point is, don’t feed it, because it has a voracious appetite which will always demand more! Starve it out! Do not give it any kind of foothold in your life.
-I know it is easy for me to stand up here and say these things, but I’m as human as anyone and can say that I’ve had to fight hard and learn to trust the Lord to help me please Him, not myself in these areas. Let’s look at v.4 which speaks of the process of becoming a God pleaser.
2. God Pleasers learn self-control
1 Thessalonians 4:4 that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable,
-The fact that they needed to learn to control their bodies in a way that honored God speaks of process. It may not happen all at once when you pray your first prayer. Our habits in life are made up of many smaller decisions. We need to learn to turn what may seem like smaller decisions over to God if we want to honor Him.
-We don’t have to give in to every desire that occurs to us! In fact, Jesus said that His followers must be willing to deny themselves, not just doing what they feel like doing. That brings us to self-control.
-Galatians 5:22-23 says, 22 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control.” When we come to the Lord in faith, asking for His grace and forgiveness and receiving His free gift of eternal life, God the Holy Spirit comes and lives in us. And because He is changing us to be more like Jesus, our lives will be filled with more and more love, joy, peace… and self-control. So if you are a Christian, you do have self-control. You may just need to exercise it more and ask God for His help. And He will help you!
-And there is something else that will help. It is called accountability. If you are willing to make yourself accountable to someone else regarding what you watch or read or do, it will help you. Why? Because you will ask your accountability partner to ask you a few questions every week when you meet or talk on the phone:
1.) Have you been in a compromising situation with a member of the opposite sex anywhere this past week, or been exposed to sexually explicit material?
2.) Have you lacked integrity in your financial dealings, or coveted something that does not belong to you?
3.) Have you lived with your wife/husband in an understanding way and been proactive in your child's development?
4.) Have you damaged another person by your words, either behind their back or face to face?
5.) Have you succumbed to a personal addiction? Explain:
6.) Have you continued to remain angry toward another?
7.) Have you secretly wished for another's misfortune so that you might excel?
8.) Have you just lied to me?
-When you know these questions are coming, you are a little more motivated to exercise self-control because you will either have to lie and lose your integrity, or you’ll have to confess your failures and find help and healing. Sounds scary, but it is something a God pleaser would do to gain control and honor God.
-Hebrews 13:4 “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”
3. God Pleasers do not live by their sensual desires
1 Thessalonians 4:5 not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God;
-This is really the flip side of self-control. It is the person who says, “I know what I want and I’m going after it. I’ll do what I want when I want with who I want.”
-The main thing to consider here is that this is how a person lives who does not know God! This is not the description of a God pleaser.
-The person who lives life based on their own desires will not produce love, joy, peace, or self-control. Galatians 5:19-21 19 When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, your lives will produce these evil results: sexual immorality, impure thoughts, eagerness for lustful pleasure, 20 idolatry, participation in demonic activities, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, divisions, the feeling that everyone is wrong except those in your own little group, 21 envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other kinds of sin. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.
-Knowing God and living for yourself do not go together. To know Him is to love Him and to love Him is to obey Him, which will result in living a pure, holy life.
4. God Pleasers do not defraud others through immorality
1 Thessalonians 4:6 and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you.
-Adultery in the Roman culture of the NT times was a punishable offense also known as wife-stealing. At the very least a man was expected to divorce an unfaithful spouse, or he could be charged with pimping. Adultery is wrong on so many levels. Families are destroyed. Kids are caught in the middle. There is betrayal and anger, and sometimes murderous rage.
-King David was a wife-stealer who defrauded one of his soldiers of his wife and then orchestrated his death to try and cover up his sin. God was not pleased and David paid dearly for his sin. But, God also showed mercy and forgave him when he repented wholeheartedly. You can read his prayer of repentance in Psalm 51.
-God sees and knows and He will punish those who indulge in this kind of living. It may be glorified and dramatized on TV, but it is still wrong in God’s eyes!
5. God Pleasers choose to live a holy life
1 Thessalonians 4:7-8 7 For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. 8 Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit.
-God does not want us to be impure, living a lustful, cheating, sinful life. He has called us to live a holy life! Without holiness we will not see the Lord. And just to be sure he had their full attention, Paul tells them that if they reject his teaching which is from the Lord, they are in essence rejecting the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit will not live in a person who is unwilling to surrender to God! Part of King David’s prayer of repentance was, “Do not take your Holy Spirit from me.” And because he was repentant his prayer was answered. He chose to turn to God and return to a life of holiness.
Conclusion: As we wrap this up, let me be clear. If you’ve ever been involved in sexual sin, God will forgive you if you ask Him to. 1 John 1:9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from every wrong. If you haven’t confessed those sins to God and received His forgiveness, please take care of that today. You don’t need to live under the guilt of the past. Jesus doesn’t want you to carry that burden. Get rid of it! Confess it. Renounce that way of life and return to God! He is not shocked or surprised by your sin. That’s why He died, so you could live and be forgiven!
-The word of God to every person in our church today: Avoid sexual immorality! It will destroy your faith, taint your testimony, and ruin many lives. It is never worth it! That’s God’s word! Let’s live it!
