Three of Life's Greatest Blessings
Suggested Scriptures: Genesis 1:26-28; 2:20 – 25; Exodus 2: 1– 10.
On this Mother's Day I want to share some thoughts about three of our world's greatest benefits.
The greatest Institution – Marriage & the Family.
The greatest Stewardship – a Child
The greatest Construction – a Christian home.
People of all persuasions recognize that the family is the basic unit of society. As goes the home, so goes the nation. A country is only as strong as the homes & families that make it up. Today, as never before in the history of this country, the home, marriage and the family are in serious trouble. Here in Nova Scotia, since 1968, when the laws were relaxed, there's been a tenfold increase in the number of divorces and broken homes. Some are even asking, can the family survive? Is marriage obsolete? Even though I don't want to dwell on the negative side, what is taking place in our world today offers great reasons for concern. Because history shows that no civilization has ever survived the disintegration of its home and family life.
This morning I do want to be sensitive to the needs of individuals. When Carol and I were married, 59 years ago, there were no cases of divorce in either of our families, for several generations. But now we have two nieces, two nephews and one son who have gone through painful divorces. So we know something about the heartaches and the hurts that need to be healed. We also have nine grandchildren and some of them are getting married and we wonder what kind of a world they are facing. In the USA it is estimated that the average length of a marriage is only 9.4 years. In almost every family today there are those who can identify with stories of broken marriages, single parent families or even family violence. So please understand that I'm not speaking with any judgemental attitude. And I'm sure that as a church and as Christians here this morning, we want to reach out to those who are hurting and demonstrate the love of Christ.
By the way, if you're planning to get married, I give you a word of advice. Don't marry for money, because you can borrow it cheaper! Someone asked a couple down in Arkansas the secret of their 50 years of a happy marriage. His answer was, I rule the roost and his wife added – I rule the rooster.
So the first subject we deal with this morning is the greatest institution in all the world – marriage and the family. I believe that marriage originated in the mind and heart of God. God himself performed the first marriage ceremony in the Garden of Eden. In Genesis 1:27, 28 we read God created man in his own image, male and female created he them. And God said in Genesis 2:18, it is not good for man to be alone, I will make a helpmate for him, for this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and be joined with his wife and the two shall be one flesh. Verse 25 we read the man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame. These words affirm the purity of sexual intimacy in marriage.
Christianity has glorified marriage more than any other religion and nearly all the greatest love poetry in the world has been produced by Christian's. If anyone says that sex itself is bad, Christianity contradicts him at once. Sex is a beautiful gift from God. Before sin ever entered the world, God said, bear children and multiply. The maker's instructions of purity before marriage and faithfulness in marriage, are safeguards to protect us rather than rules to punish us.
Remember when we were young, how we read fairy-tales about Cinderella or sleeping beauty being rescued by Prince charming. Usually, there were all sorts of problems during the courtship stage. But once they were married all their problems were solved and the story would end with the words, “They lived happily ever after.” I fear that many people today are going into marriage with that fairytale mentality. We've been so brainwashed from Hollywood and television, that we expect marriage to be a perpetual honeymoon with no problems whatsoever. Then when we discover that our heavenly angel has feet of clay we feel that we must have made a tragic mistake and so we have the right to throw it all over and start again. Like the lady who said, “I thought marriage would be the ideal, it turned out to be an ordeal and now I want a new deal” We need to be reminded of the fact that marriage may be made in heaven, but all the maintenance work has to be done right here on earth. And to have a good marriage you have to work at it continually.
According to some people, faithfulness in marriage is as rare as a three dollar bill and happiness in marriage is a the thing of the past. I believe both of those statements are false. Let me add some words of encouragement. Just a few years ago there was an extensive survey on marriage in North America and also a book by Andrew Greenly, with the title Faithful Attraction. These researchers worked independently of one another and they both discovered that the institution of marriage in North America, on the whole, is in much better shape than most people think. 91% of the women and 89% of the men surveyed said that they had only one sexual partner during the duration of their marriage with no hint of adultery. 74% agreed strongly that faithfulness is essential to a happy marriage 81% said that if they were doing it over again, they would marry the same person and 78% said that their spouse was their best friend.
Please bear in mind that these surveys were conducted by secular interests. But here's another surprising discovery. Religion, especially prayer has by far the most powerful influence for good upon marriage attitudes and behavior. 76% of those who often prayed together and 72% of those who attend church together say that their marriages are very happy which is a much higher percentage than the population at large.
This is one reason why the early Christian church made such a strong impression on the Roman empire. There standards for marriage and the family were so much higher, and more meaningful than the world around them that the Christian institution of marriage stood out like a diamond in a weed patch or an oasis in the desert. People were drawn toward Christ and the church because those early believers outlived, out loved and out died the pagan world around them. The world says, in marriage, two is company, threes a crowd. That is true in terms of human relationships, but the Bible says-- it takes three to make a great marriage. Yes, marriage is for three – a man, a maid and God. Leave God out and you let trouble in. This is a strange paradox but absolutely true that the more love a man has for God the more love he will have for his wife and family. Someone has said that if we worked half as hard at keeping our marriages alive and well as we did at courtship before marriage, how different life would be.
We've all heard the expression, the family that prays together, stays together. I know this is true from our own experience. I must confess that Carol..................certainly deserves a medal for putting up with me for almost 60 years. There have been times in our marriage when we were so emotionally disturbed that we found it very hard to talk to one another. But together, we could talk to God in prayer and that made all the difference. When both husband and wife surrender to God they will stop trying to conquer one another. And here's a seven word prayer they can change any marriage. “Lord change this marriage, beginning with me.” Dr. Lewis Evans, who has counselled thousands of couples over the years, has this to say. “I challenge you to give me the name of any couple who went to the divorce court, and who prayed together, I said together, a week before they went. God is the great adhesive, the holder together of two hearts, the preserver of our partnerships. So, start praying together, keep praying together. Hearts close to God, never stray far from each other. Pray together and stay together always. And so may the great institution of marriage grow in strength and fulfillment in the days and years to come.
And now we consider the greatest Stewardship – a Child. You can put a monetary value on your house, your car or your business. But who would put a price tag on a child? And yet it is true that many times the most priceless member of the family is the most neglected. God never intended the home to be a boarding house, a hotel, or just a baby sitting service. Children need to be brought up lovingly in the nurture and knowledge of the Lord.
A child is the greatest Stewardship because it makes the greatest demand upon us. Children can consume more time, money, love and care than everything else combined. But let me add that I believe it is time well spent, especially in the early years. Psychologists agree that the first seven years of a child's life are the most important in terms of character and personality development. Many times we don't realize this until this its late. Today we are witnessing a strange contrast. We hear or read stories of the actions of the worst kind of parents. But at the same time there are some very good marriages and wonderful parents. In fact, I believe that some of the very best parents that ever existed are living right now. In fact some of them are here in our church. It warms my heart to see these young families in our midst.
In the Scripture that was read this morning from Exodus 2:1-10, we find a beautiful story for Mother's Day. You remember how Pharaoh, the king of Egypt, passed a law that all Hebrew boy babies must be drowned in the river Nile. Moses mother, Jockabed, could not bear to give up her child and so she hid him as long as she dared. Then one day she made a basket of reeds, waterproofed it with tar, added a soft mattress and made a lovely ark for the baby Moses. Then she placed it near the river bank with his sister Miriam close at hand.
You know the story how Pharaoh's daughter found the baby in the bulrushes and it was love at first sight. She took the baby home to the palace and wanted to adopt him as her own son. And Moses own mother became his nursemaid. A beautiful example of the providence and love of God at work in the lives of those who trust him. But I call your attention to verse nine especially. Pharaoh's daughter said to Moses mother, “Take this child and nurse him for me and I will pay you your wages.” And so here we have Moses mother doing the very thing she wanted to do and she was getting paid for it. And here we have the first example of government sponsored day care.
But there is a deeper truth expressed here. I believe that God will hold parents responsible for the way in which they bring up their children. God says, take this child and raise it for me. Not for the world, for me! Not for the tavern or the nightclub but for me! Not to marry someone with money and no morals but for me! And then notice the outcome-- I will pay you your wages. God pays good parents as no one else can pay them.
Where did Moses get his faith? Where did he get the backbone and the courage to suffer affliction with the people of God rather than enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season? I believe from his real parents, especially his mother. Moses had the right start in life. God is still saying to parents in the words of Scripture, Take this child and train it for me and I pay you your wages. The loan of a life, that precious child is not yours, he or she has been given to you by God for a few years in trust. Your child represents the greatest Stewardship, the greatest responsibility that you will ever have in this life. Someday you will be held accountable for the example you set the training you gave. So, as parents and grandparents here this morning let us make sure that our names are on God's payroll.
We've looked at the greatest institution – Marriage. The greatest Stewardship – a Child. And now the third and final truth. The greatest construction, a Christian Home. First of all we need to ask what constitutes a Christian home? Does it make any difference to have one? I used to think that if both parents were professing Christians, with some involvement in a local church, they would automatically have what the Bible calls a Christian home. I now know that it's not that simple. What about things such as daily prayer, Bible centered discipline, setting some loving limitation's. What about sacrificial love and training in moral and family values? There are thousands of children growing up today who have never, never, heard their parents pray. We make arrangements for air-conditioning why not give a few min. a day for prayer conditioning. T
A few years ago, Dr. Merville Vincent, a well-known and highly respected Canadian psychiatrist from Guelph Ontario, presented a document to the Ontario Psychiatric Association wherein he examined the merits of the biblical standard for marriage and the family. He pointed out that as we study history, we find that down through the years people have tried every conceivable experiment with sexual relationships – polygamy, trial marriages, common-law liaisons, homosexual relationships, premarital and extramarital affairs. But there is nothing new about this so-called new morality. It is as old as Sodom and Gomorrah. These excursions into the sexual wilderness have been tried many times and rejected because they simply will not work.
Dr. Vincent points out that in all of this experimentation a simple behaviour pattern, like cream, continually rises to the top as the ideal for human well-being and happiness. And that is the biblical pattern of husband and wife loving each other so much that they do not care to love anyone else in the same way. A father and mother building a permanent home that places around the children the strong security of an unbroken affection. This brings us to a very crucial question. What is the best and most helpful thing a father can do for his children? The answer – love their mother, his wife! What is the best thing a mother can do for her children ?– love their father, her husband. Why? Because when the children know that mommy and daddy love each other this gives them a sense of security and warmth that cannot be found in any other way.
With some money and hard work you could build a house. Add love to that house and you have a home. Add GOD to that home and you have a Temple. And made in the image of God as we are, we will never be truly happy or fulfilled until our homes become Temples for the living God. I thank God that his plan includes marriage, the home and family. I know I have failed many times to be the kind of man, the kind of husband and father that God would have me be. I'm thankful for his grace and forgiveness. Perhaps right now, deep down in your heart, you know that your marriage or home and family relationships are not what they should be. We need to return to the maker's instructions. Remember, God is able to mend broken hearts and even broken homes if we are willing to give him all the pieces. Amen, God bless you everyone.
Let us pray –Oh God our father, we thank you for your plan for marriage and the family. Everyone here today, without exception, is part of a family somewhere. Lord, if ever there was a time in history when families needed your help, it is now. We confess that many of our problems today, stem from the fact that we have gone our own selfish way and have departed from our Makers instructions. And we will never find true joy, peace and fulfillment until we return to your plan and purpose.
We thank you for all parents in our midst today and for single parents and grandparents. We pray also for those mothers who are laid aside in hospitals and nursing homes. We thank you for their unselfish devotion over the years and in many cases their godly example. We ask you to strengthen those marriages that are sagging under the pressure of emotional, financial and sexual problems. We think two of those who do not have a mother's prayers to follow them through life and of those who do not have the memory of a good home.
May there be a willingness in our hearts today to return to the faith of our fathers and mothers and to those principles of truth, purity and justice that made this country great in the beginning. We believe that Christ is the answer to our needs. May we allow Him to be the Lord of our hearts and homes. This we pray in his blessed and holy name. Amen
